Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Screen”

 

SOCS

It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again. This week’s prompt is “screen.” Linda Hill in her benevolence says we can use it any way we want. I don’t know about you, but there are only so many ways to use “screen.” I will do my best but am not counting on extra points. If you would like to join this happy crew, go to Linda’s post and read all about it. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2016/10/14/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-1516/

Screen by John W. Howell © 2016

“Don’t slam the screen do—”

“What?”

“Never mind. It’s too late.”

“Too late for what?”

“Slamming the flippin screen door.”

“Oh. Sorry. I’ll try harder next time.”

“Sure you will. Where’ve you been?”

“I was at football practice.”

“So late? How come?”

“We were working on a screen pass.”

“Screen pass? What’s that?”

“Do you know what a shotgun offensive line up is?”

“No.”

“Let’s not get into a screen pass then. Way too complicated.”

“Aw come on. Can’t be that tough.”

“Okay, the quarterback—”

“Who?”

“Aw. Just trust me. It took extra time.”

“I got your application ready for the screening committee.”

“Oh super. Let me look.”

“It says here that I’m an honors student.”

“Yeah. So?”

“I have all C’s”

“You don’t cheat do you?”

“No.”

“You have honor.”

“I don’t think it works that way.”

“Well, it should.”

“You also have me down as a member of the band.”

“You play the guitar, right?”

“How can I be in the band when I play football.?”

“Okay take that one off.”

“I’ll tell you how this screening is going to go. I’m going to be screened out.”

“Who wants that school anyway?”

“I do.”

“Good luck then.”

“It is going to take more than luck.”

“I know that’s why I padded your application a little.”

“How do I get ahead by cheating?”

“Remember the whole idea that anyone can become President ?”

“Sure.”

“Well, there you go. Cheating doesn’t count anymore. Go for it and don’t slam that screen do—”

 

 

43 comments

  1. That football part of the conversation would be me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. se it would. American football is so confusing. 😀 (and so American)

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Gwen Plano · ·

    You are seriously hilarious…. This is a fun piece…perfect for a Saturday morn.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m glad it brought a smile. Thanks, Gwen. 😀

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  3. LOL… I’m afraid I would have been asking all those same football questions. Happy Saturday, John. Mega hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Teagan. Super Saturday to you as well. Hugs

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  4. Well that’s plastered a smile all over my face! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Excellent. 🙂

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  5. LOL! Growing up, I can’t tell you the number of times I heard my mother yell, “Don’t slam the screen.” 🙂 Happy Saturday!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Jill.happy Saturday to you. *sung to the tune of “Happy Days” by Pratt & McClain

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Loved the ‘honor’ part. Nicely done.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Charles. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  7. The screen door thing hits close to home, John. I still do that. The whole college application process has turned into a mind-boggling mess, IMO. I am so glad I don’t have to think about that, or the annual FAFSA financial report, ever again.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes just wait until you qualify for Medicare.

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      1. Thanks John. I think we used to call that a ‘buzz kill’

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  8. They do say that anyone can be president, even, as in Ronald Reagan’s case, a star of the silver screen.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I love it, and remember those screen doors that had a spring that slammed themselves shut.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes. We have one.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Oh my, another side-splitter, John! I love your wit, good sir!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, John

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  11. I thought I was the only one in the whole world who knew nothing about football. I guess I win this time. I’m NOT the only one. Ha ha. An amusing story. You’re so good at these, John. another delightful read 😀 :-).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Tess. Glad you liked it.

      Like

  12. You do so much with so little, John.
    The prompt, I mean!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Whew. I thought you might be talking about my looks. 🙂 Thanks.

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      1. Not a chance!

        Liked by 1 person

  13. Hahaha! Nicely done, John. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Ha! This brings thoughts of the screen door my dad placed to keep out the flies, somehow we kept slamming the poor thing – I think it was the spring attached to it- that’s to blame for all the shouting we got.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha ha ha. Love the memories of childhood. Thank you, Jacqueline. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh thank you. What’s my grade?

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      1. A+ you get the + because you’re always on time and put a lot of thought into your submissions.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. OOOOO A+ Must bring an apple to school tomorrow. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      3. I can’t afford Honeycrisp so it has to be Gala

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  15. Good one, John. The screen door brought back memories. Yep, we used to slam it and Mom would say…don’t slam the … Your dialogue is just about perfect!! Love it! 💛 Christine

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Christine. I have one now.:-D

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