Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt Mini/Maxi

 

It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again, and here comes Linda Hill carrying a big and little box. I’ll bet she has a surprise for us as far as a prompt goes.

“Hi, Linda. What’s in the boxes?”

“It’s the Holiday, John. It needs to be a surprise. Put these under the tree and open them Christmas Day.”

“What about the prompt?”

“Man, you are type A, aren’t you. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “mini/maxi.” Use “mini” (the smallest of something) or “maxi” (the largest) or both in your post. Have fun!”

“Thanks for the gifts.”

Mini/Maxi by John W. Howell © 2020

“Where’d you get the boxes?”

“Linda Hill gave them to me.”

“Open them up.”

‘She said to wait until Christmas day.”

“Look around.”

“What?”

“You see Linda here?”

“Well, no.”

“So how will she know if you open them or not?”

“It will ruin the surprise.”

“What surprise is that?”

“You know the surprise you get when you open a present.”

“These don’t look like presents. These are cardboard boxes. One has the printing MAXI on it. The other MINI.”

“I know, but she said—”

“Forget what she said. You have got to break the spell she has over you.”

“She has no spell.”

“Prove it.”

“Fine. I’ll open them. The Maxi first. OMG. There is a gift certificate with all my bonus points. It is for a Bentley Turbo Convertable.”

“Wow. Lucky. What’s in the box marked MINI?”

“It’s a note.”

“What does it say?”

Since you opened the box before Christmas, you have voided the certificate.”

“Oh, come on. Just close it back up again, and no one will be the wiser.”

“The note goes on to say not to try that.”

“At least you got the prompt written. Besides, what would you do with a Bentley?”

“Drive you to the Emergency room.”

“I don’t need the emergency room.”

“Just hold on for two minutes.”

“Why two minutes?”

“That’s how long it will take me to get my ball bat.”

“Oh, well, time to go.”

“Good move.”

 

 

52 comments

  1. Bwahaha … a read delivering a smile this morning. Enjoy your Saturday.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, Frank. 😊

      Like

    2. I wasn’t quite sure how to express my delight in this week’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday offering from John. Bwahaha fits the bill quite nicely. Bwahaha!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome, Frank. 🙂

        Like

  2. LOL! Good one, John. Happy Saturday!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Happy Saturday to you Jill *sung to the tune of Me and You and a Dog Named Boo by Lobo.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Ha! Great job on the prompt, John. So close to the prize. Foes that mean you forfeit the bonus points? I’m going to be very careful if that doorbell rings.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think I do but am afraid to ask. 😂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Linda makes a good Santa! Great stream of consciousness John.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Maggie

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Hi,
    I really like this one. It has humor in it. It pays to wait. Sometimes our impatience spoils our best surprises. Great job.
    Shalom aleichem,
    Pat Garcia

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Pat. Shalom aleichem

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Rabirius.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Now you’ve gone and done it! There is a reason we are told to wait… 😉
    Always fun, these Saturday morning exchanges!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes, waiting is the essence of self control. Here take this case of Guinness Extra Stout and don’t drink any till Christmas.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. You. Are. The. BEST!!! 😘😘😘

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Buahahaha!

    I guess there are times when following instructions really is the best idea. And I think a baseball bat is one of those times.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahahha. Yup. Haste makes waste they say. Try not to hit on the trademark.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, that wouldn’t be good For anyone.

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Who was Lee ? And did he have an unfortune encounter with a bat… just like his car ? Put down the stick and step away from the slugger… besides you will really regret it when you discover the timeless eternal wait at the emergency room. Did I mention Promethean wait ? PS you were right about not opening the boxes before Christmas…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes. We shoud all heed the warning about advanced gift pilfering.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. AGP oh my ! Would those be the whispered people at the top of Santa’s naughty list ?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. How did you know?

        Liked by 1 person

  9. Gwen M. Plano · ·

    You wouldn’t…nah…or would you? Hmm, best not to open that box. Good one, John. 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah. I never peek. Thanks, Gwen.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. ImThat’s what you get for being a type a person. 🙄😂 I always enjoy your humorous tales. And the ones with tails also!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. Pam. I’m so glad you do. Tales and tails.

      Like

  11. Laughing out loud, John!! Thanks for the chuckles this morning!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for letting me know I got to your funny bone, Jan. 😁

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  12. ANOTHER ‘PEARL’!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Billy Ray.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Oh John, you are hilarious … an impatient apparently [wink]!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Bummer. Insurance is probably a killer on that Bentley anyway.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah. Good point.

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Hahaha! A good ‘un, John 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Jessica.

      Liked by 1 person

  16. D.L. Finn, Author · ·

    Funny John. Sounds like it was a given to open early.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. At least the temptation, right?

      Like

  17. Really good, John! That Bentley… almost!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well, maybe another time. Thanks, Jennie.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Hey, dreams can come true. 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

      2. If not, in this life maybe the next.

        Liked by 2 people

      3. Don’t give up the ship. Or the car. 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

  18. Linda Hill knows you all too well! Just look on the bright side, though … think how much it would have cost to insure that Bentley!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah, I think that is a good point.

      Liked by 2 people