Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #315 by Keith Channing

In Keith’s words.

“Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.combefore 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next Monday.”

The photo.

Bird on a calculator

The Order by John W. Howell © 2021

“I know you hate to go over budget. That’s why I offered to help.”

“How can you help?”

“Easy. You write down an item and tell me the cost. Then, I plug it into the calculator for you. In the end, we will have a total. and you’ll know if you are over or under.”

“What if I’m over?”

“You simply go down the list and eliminate items until you are on budget again.”

“Seems logical. What if I’m under budget?”

“That is really simple. You add some stuff you always wanted but felt you couldn’t afford.”

“I like this system. It adds a little bit of discipline to the shopping trip.”

“That’s right and gives you control.”

“I can’t believe a bird came up  with this.”

“I’m telling you if more people listened to the advice of birds, this would be a better place to live. Before we start listing, what is your budget?”

“I would say $50.00.”

“Okay, give me the first item.”

“Birdseed $4.50.”

“Got it. The second.”

“Twelve pack of VooDoo Ranger ale, $16.50.”

“Okay. Next.”

“Standing rib roast $22.50.”

“Whew. Next.”

“Bottle of red wine $10.00.”

“Cheap. Next.”

“Used to be two bucks. They called it Two Buck Chuck. Now it should be called Ten Buck Chuck. That’s my list.”

“Okay, let me hit total. Uh oh.”

“Uh oh?”

“Yeah, the total is $53.50.”

“That’s not good.”

“Might have to eliminate something. How about the wine?”

“Lifes blood.”

Vo Doo Ranger?”

“Brain food.”

“Smaller Standing rib roast?”

“Too many mouths.”

“Don’t tell me.”

“What’s the total without the birdseed?”

“Aw, come on. Who thought of this system in the first place?”

“So you shouldn’t be surprised. The total?”

“$49.00.”

“Under budget.”

“Yup. It’s a cruel world.”

“I do thank you for your idea.”

“Yeah, sure. Anytime. As they say, ‘no good deed goes unpunished.'”

“Who says?”

“Who indeed? I’m sure it was a bird.”

 

 

 

59 comments

  1. No good deed goes unpunished. Never was a truer word spoken. Nice one, John.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Keith. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Lol! I always thought we should listen more to the birds. Good one, John!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I agree. They have something to say for sure. Thank you, Jill. 😁

      Like

  3. There goes the accountant’s pay.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Poor bird. The brains of the operation, and look what happened. lol

    Funny stuff, John.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, Staci. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I think he is used to it. Thanks, Liz.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. The Rodney Dangerfield of birds, eh?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Hahaha. Yes.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. That’s what you get for having a bright idea. Poor little guy.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So true. It’s the idea guys who tend to be shortchanged.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. A very good one. Its not easy for birds, these times. 😉 xx Michael

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Or anyone with an idea. Thanks, Michael.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yeah! Thank you John! xx

        Liked by 1 person

  7. We were on the same train of thought today basically. Mine, “Thought you could balance your budget by eliminating Wild Bird Seed, eh? Think again!”

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yup, the same track for sure. Thanks, GP. 😁.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. John you are just lucky you did not run into Jurassic Lark. It could easily have been the voodoo ranger on the chopping block…

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank would be tragic for sure.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Some of your best stuff.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Craig. I appreciate your comment.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. A delightful read, John! Birds are going through hard times. 🙂

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  11. Oh my… that’s what you get for lending a hand! It get’s cut off!
    Fun stuff, John!

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  12. Poor guy! Hopefully that little bird will find someone else who won’t eliminate his food from their budget.
    Highly enjoyable, John!

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  13. Typical. Punish the guy who tried to put you on track.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, very typical.

      Liked by 1 person

  14. I actually like the bird’s way of budgeting, John. I just knew the seed was going to lose out. Lol. The bird brain didn’t quite think that one through. 🙂 A fun story.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No. She was filled with enthusiasm in wanting to help. Thanks, Diana.

      Liked by 1 person

  15. D.L. Finn, Author · ·

    Aw, the poor little bird.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know right?

      Liked by 1 person

  16. Hey, it was the bird’s idea. 🙂 Perhaps next time, try a different budget expert. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. There you go. I agree, the bird needs defending.

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Gwen M. Plano · ·

    Love the little bird! Brilliant dialogue, John, as always. 😃

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Gwen.

      Like

  18. Good one, John, but poor birdie 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Poor birdie indeed.

      Liked by 1 person

  19. Well, the list WAS heavy on priorities so the bird should hope for an increase in the budget at some future time . . .

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, indeed. Maybe his seed will be on the next iteration.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m thinking.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Careful on that thinking stuff.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Small doses, Boss. Small doses . . .

        Liked by 1 person

  20. Ah, poor bird! Maybe he can search the couch and chairs for loose change and get that birdseed back in the budget. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Good idea. He could also get a sign that says, “Will sing for bird food.”

      Liked by 1 person

  21. Two buck chuck! I used to live in New Mexico, and I miss that stuff!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes indeed. We all miss it. 😁

      Like

  22. Glad he kept the wine and the roast! Smart bird.

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    1. Thank you, Jennie. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome, John.

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  23. Very nicely expressed

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. 😊

      Like

  24. […] The Order by John W. Howell © 2021 […]

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