Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
This post was originally run on December 14th, 2014. I think the advice is still good and I hope you enjoy it.
* * *
The inspiration for this list was a discussion between The Producer and me about how kids can light the parental upset fuse by a simple question. We both have asked some and have been asked some.
Top Ten Things You Never Should Have Asked Your Mother
10 You should never have asked your mother, “What meatloaf again?” If you did, at best, you got a cold stare and shoulder. At worst, you were invited to partake of food at the neighbor’s house. (The look told you she meant it but also, you better not.)
9 You should never have asked your mother on her birthday, “How old are you now?” If you did, at best, you got a lecture on poor manners. At worst, you were witness to flying cake and a bedroom door slam that you still see in your nightmares. (The heat from the flaming candles should have been a clue to clam up)
8 You should never have asked your mother once your dad told you no. “Dad says to come and ask you for the car keys.” If you did, at best, you’ll get a response that confirms your dad’s opinion. At worst, you will have been solely responsible for the resultant three months of additional chores once the parental units caught up to your scheme. ( Good luck on ever seeing those keys)
7 You should never have asked your mother, “Don’t you think that dress is a little out of style.” If you did, at best, your mother will go change but not talk to you for the rest of the day. At worst, you will be subjected to a long lecture about all the things your mother gave up so that you could have the most up-to-date clothing. (She is probably right, you ungrateful dependent you)
6 You should never have asked your mother, “Can you and dad leave while my friends come over?” If you did, at best, you will get a firm “No” in response. At worst, you will be delighted to have your parents sitting in the same room where you and your friends are gathering. (Your worst nightmare has come true)
5 You should never have called your mother on April Fools Day asking, “Come bail me out of jail?” If you did, at best, a cold cloth applied by dad worked to revive her. At worst, the joke will have backfired to the point where your mom still thinks there was something behind it. (Not lovely to play high stakes jokes on your worried mom)
4 You should never have asked your mother to bake cupcakes for the soccer team the night before the event. If you did, at best, the cupcakes were made, but you owed your mom big time. At worst, the cakes were made, but you were so tired from helping you had the worst game ever. (Notice the cakes got made in each case?)
3 You should never have asked your mother to give you lunch money instead of packing a lunch since all the cool kids buy their lunch. If you did, at best, you got the money but also a discussion about proper nutrition and peer pressure. At worst, you didn’t get the money and now find your lunch consists of every food you can’t stand, including many fruits. (Mom’s way of telling you to quit trying to be part of the in-crowd.)
2 You should have never asked your mother to tell a fib about where you were when your stood-up date called to talk to you. If you did, at best, your mother simply hands the phone to you. At worst, your mother tells your date that you are not interested in talking. (The truth will ice that relationship. Won’t it?)
1 You should have never asked your mother to babysit your kids. If you did, at best, all had an excellent time. At worst, your mother doesn’t want to return them to you. ( A considerable risk for sure.)
Fiction Favorites 
Reblogged this on OPENED HERE >> https:/BOOKS.ESLARN-NET.DE.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you for the share, Michael. 😊
LikeLike
Thank you for the entertainment, John! You never should ask any woman about her age, or ask if you should buy more candles for the cake. Lol Have a nice Monday! xx Michael
LikeLiked by 1 person
So true. I hope you enjoy Monday too, Michael.😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you very much, John! xx Michael
LikeLiked by 1 person
What? Trying to play one parent off against the other isn’t a good idea?
LikeLiked by 3 people
Item one in every teen’s playbook, I should think.
LikeLiked by 2 people
My brother and I didn’t wait for our teens to start with those machinations.
LikeLiked by 2 people
We kids were blaming each other for everything before then.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yeah, my brother and I figured out that we could get away with more as conspirators than as combatants.
LikeLiked by 2 people
😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahaha
LikeLiked by 1 person
What did you do with them?
LikeLiked by 1 person
We joined forces to unleash a tsnami of mischief. (We were a legend in our own minds.)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sounds great.
LikeLiked by 1 person
😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
It ends up n the between a rock and hard place position. Thanks, Liz.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome, John. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
These are great, John! Happy Monday!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you, Jill. I hope you have a super day as well. 😁
LikeLike
Ah so true
LikeLiked by 1 person
Indeed.
LikeLike
Great tips, John. Especially laughing at number six. 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
I still remember that one from my kids. “We won’t get into trouble, promise.” Yeah sure. 🙄
LikeLiked by 1 person
😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
Loved these, John. I especially smiled over #1. What a sweet response. 💗
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you, Gwen. You know how it feels to return grandkids. Big void for a few days. 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
haha, I had to be careful about anything I told my mother!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think we all did. Thanks, GP.
LikeLiked by 1 person
So many dangerous questions.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Big time. Thaks, Charles.
LikeLike
Ha ha! You never disappoint!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m so glad, Pamela. Thanks for the lovely comment. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Definitely #10. I hated my mom’s meatloaf.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahahaha. That means it must have been on the weekly menu too.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good ones, John! Took me back decades and brought back some good memories.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m glad, Tim. Thanks for letting me know.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good ones all, John! My children were guilty of #4 on MANY occasions!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think all kids were guilty. Thanks, Noelle.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This may just be the best list ever, John. Love the cupcake fiasco and yes, the cupcakes got made regardless. Happy Monday!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know I was there too. Thanks, Jan.
LikeLike
All great, but #1 is the best! Mom did give them back to me but not until they were loaded with sugar!
LikeLiked by 1 person
There you go. Wind them up and give them back.
LikeLiked by 1 person
We used to send my baby sister in to ask for almost everything b/c she had, ” the look” that neither of my parent’s could refuse…well, not always but, more times than not! 😂
Baby Girl knows we’d love to keep the boys!! Since we can’t keep them we spoil them. 🥰
LikeLiked by 1 person
Spoiling is a good alternative. You know you are doing your job when your child asks you to stop doing something.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol Great list, John, and a lot of very realistic warnings in this list. I’m pretty sure I asked my mom #1,3,and 4. I wish I’d asked her #5. Do you think it’s too late?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Diana. No, go ahead and ask #5.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I pulled them all, except for #6 and #1. Some things never, ever change!
LikeLiked by 1 person
As they say, the more they change the more they stay the same.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great blast from the past, thanks.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Craig.
LikeLiked by 1 person
My mother got some magazine award for her meatloaf. I remember having to clap not understanding the big deal when to me it was just a very long hamburger. I was about 7 going on 40, at the time.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hahahaha. I can see you going through the motions. My experieince with meat loaf is to douse it with catsup and all is good.
LikeLiked by 1 person
She must have known someone. I mean it. It’s just chopped meat after all.
LikeLiked by 1 person
How good can meatloaf be anyway? 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Agreed!!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
😁
LikeLike
I would never have asked mom for bail money on April 1st when there are 364 other days in which to do so.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahahaha. 🤣
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great list, John, and timeless for all generations! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Lauren
LikeLiked by 1 person
This one brought back a lot of memories. My mom and grandma used to guard their age until they got much older. Then they told others with great pride.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I only opened up about being eighty when I turned eighty. 😁 There is some pride there. Thanks, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I would never have asked my mom for bail money because she would figure I deserved to spend the night in jail. If my dad said yes, I didn’t ask Mom… However, he usually deferred to her so.. nope. As for babysitting my kids? She was always called first. Problem is, she always gave them back!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love that , Dale. (She would always give them back) 🤣
LikeLiked by 1 person
I thought you’d get a kick out of that one 😉 🤣😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
🤣
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on Stevie Turner and commented:
Here’s a funny tale to go with this re-blog:
Back in the 1970 when I was a rather green teenager, I once asked my father why men were walking around wearing tee shirts with the motif ‘I choked Linda Lovelace’. I remember Dad looked quite alarmed for a brief moment, and then said “Go and ask your mother”. I duly did as I was told, and received the reply, “Ask your father.” When I eventually did find out much later on, I cringed at that memory!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, this is hysterical Stevie. I just cringed for you too. Thank you so much for sharing my post and your story. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
It really is cringe-making, lol.
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
It never ends with most moms. does it John. From one “ungrateful dependent” to another.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahaha. So true. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
PS, I didn’t get notification for this one
LikeLiked by 1 person
Stupid WP.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I LOVE #5. Wish I’d thought of it when I was a kid.
LikeLike
Hahaha. Of course yours might not have been a joke.
LikeLiked by 1 person
[…] View the original post. […]
LikeLike
Thank you for sharing my post, Abbie.
LikeLike
Hi John, this post made me laugh. My son, Michael, said I was a ‘helicopter’ mother about 2 days before the Omicron news broke (2 weeks ago). He wanted to go with his school class on an outing into a densely populated area where most of the people would be unvaccinated (I agree, what was the school thinking!) Anyhow, he didn’t go and 2 days later we got the good news and on the Friday the school notified the parents that there had been a outbreak of covid among the boys who went on the outing. The school was closed from Monday as the virus spread very quickly. Omicron seems very contagious but not that severe if you are vaccinated.
LikeLike
This is such an amazing fun read. I love the inate humour that of course stems from real life. Love it 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for the visit and lovely compliment. 😊
LikeLike
I like the April Fool’s prank. Good think I never thought of that when I was young! This was fun, John.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Jennie. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome, John.
LikeLiked by 1 person
In the context of no.1 there is a Hindi saying which translates to “interest is loved more than the principal” which means grandchildren are loved more than children 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
I like that one, Ankur. Thank you.
LikeLike
Hilarious!!! 😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for the visit. I’m glad you like the post, Simi. 😁
LikeLike