Waiting as usual for the meister of brew to cough up my hot, steaming, frothy cup of joe, a glance toward the newspaper captures a disturbing headline. Customers who have bagged their own groceries are seen as a minimum wage worker threat. Needing more information after the cup is delivered, I grab the paper and head for the back porch.
The story details that the habit some shoppers have of bagging their own groceries is viewed by store bagging employees as threatening their way of life. “Minimum wage phobic,” was how one worker put it. The worker went on to say that a law ought to be passed, making those who have bagged their own groceries guilty of a hate crime.
Sipping my brew and thinking deeply about the issue causes me to miss the first blaring second of the klaxon horn we call a doorbell. Twiggy and Lucy have already gone airborne, so it’s best to see who is there. Then, casting about some turkey treats to turn the dog’s attention to something other than the door, I do the ritual and finally open it.
“I say, boy. This here. I say this here is delivery.” The line came out of Foghorn Leghorn with the velocity to raise my thinning hair. “I say, boy. Don’t. I say, don’t just stand there. I say take this envelope.” It is strange to have someone blowing hot air that has the scent of corn. I take the envelope, and Foghorn Leghorn wishes me a good day and struts off down the street.
Knowing it was from Linda Hill, in no hurry, I watch as the giant chicken disappears around the corner. Turning to the envelope, a quick opening reveals this message. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “bagged.” Use it any way you’d like. Enjoy! If you want to enjoy, visit Linda’s blog and read how easy it is. Here’s the link. https://lindaghill.com/2022/07/15/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-16-2022/
Bagged by John W. Howell © 2022
“No one is going to believe this, you know.”
“It’s fiction. They don’t have to believe it.”
“But you are spreading falsehoods.”
“Happy falsehoods.”
“Huh.”
“Readers like to hear about happy, no-brainer stuff.”
“You certainly have the no-brainer covered.”
“What’s wrong with a little fantasy fun?”
“Well, for one, this is a serious world full of serious problems that should be taken seriously.”
“All the more reason to have a diversion from all that seriousness.”
“This is getting tense. I’m all for getting this discussion bagged and heading for the pub.”
“What about all those serious subjects?”
“You have your fantasy way of coping. I have my barley pop method.”
“It’s good you are buying.”
“Yes, with that in mind, let’s walk.”
“You going to be overserved?”
“Let’s just say it might be a possibility.”
“Walking is good.”
Fiction Favorites 
Hi John , do I detect that Foghorn is visiting quite often, you could be having a potential lodger on your hands….it could be worse it could that Coyote and his Roadrunner sidekick 💜 Great fun as ever 💜💜
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Thank you, Willow. I hope he doesn’t decide to stay. Chicken feed is not priced like chicken feed when you need bushels.
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I know I was a tad worried about that 💓💓
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😁
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🤣🤣
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I can’t even remember the last time I saw someone bag a person’s groceries. Think that stopped around here a few years ago. Not sure why.
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I don’t know why either. Thanks, Charles.
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There are folks hired to bag groceries? We bag all our own groceries in Spain, and I think all of Europe, and have for years. (We also bring our own reusable cloth bags) Of all the cartoon characters, Foghorn Leghorn is my favourite. You should invite him in for a coffee next time.
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I say, Darlene. I say what a great idea.
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😁
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😊
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Foghorn Leghorn is one of my favorites, John. Be careful getting bagged while walking. Pedestrians aren’t safe out there.
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Always careful since I don’t walk very far. Bike riding is my forte
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I love my bike, but I can’t ride very far without upsetting my neck.
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Bad necks and bikes don’t mix
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I keep trying to find ways to make it work, but 20-30 minutes is all I can get.
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Neck pain is awful.
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This goes down my left arm and stays there.
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UGH
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Good old Foghorn! Ya gotta love ’em.
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I say you do. Thanks, GP.
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“Twiggy and Lucy have already gone airborne.” LOL! The only time we bag our groceries is if we go through the self-check out. I stay away from that area…it’s too high-crime! Happy Saturday, John!
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Happy Saturday to you, Jill *Sung to the tune of Tossin’ and Turnin’ by Bobby Lewis
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Oh, dear. I actually believed the “bagging your own groceries is a hate crime” news story. *face palm*
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Oh no. I’m sorry I should have put up a warning, “All so called facts on this post are made up.” Next time. 😁
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Thank you. *embarrassed face*
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Remember this blog is titled Fiction Favorites
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🙂
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😊
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Good old Foghorn Leghorn. Happy Saturday, John. 🙂
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I say boy. I say I like the ‘good’ but maybe. I say maybe the ‘old’ is a bit premature.
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Ha! 🙂
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Well, with a dozen fabric grocery store bags in hand, I give you two chicken wings up for today’s post. Good job, John.
Sincerely yours,
A Self-Checkout and Bagging Phobic/Threat?
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Thank you, Mary. I know you would not care about what these dopes think.
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Well written
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John, you’ve really, I say you’ve really outdone yourself! This is better than Saturday morning cartoons. 😀 Hugs, I say big hugs on the rooster wing.
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By the way, I have the same reaction to the door bell…
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Ha ha ha.
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Thank, I say. Thank you, Teagan I say. 😊
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What’s the saying? “Into every life, a little beer must pour.”? I think someone said that, somewhere at some time . . .
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I agree. A little beer is the difference between life and good life. (Not talking Millers either.)
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You know it Boss.
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😁
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Foghorn Leghorn deserves a little primetime. LOL. And, we deserve/need something to laugh about. Good one, John. Hope your weekend has some cool breezes. 😊
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Thanks, Gwen. Sadly it is just hot. Today is 99 degrees and we are acting like it is a gift. (Which I guess it is)
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The newspaper article is in line with why I insist on going through traditional check-out, as opposed to the check yourself out station.
You should have asked Foghorn in for a coffee!
That would be fun.
Who is this guy you talk to every week, and have a beer with? 🧐
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Yes I should have asked him in for coffee but I wasn’t sure if he is housebroken. The guy is a dear friend of mine who passed in 2012. He continues to try and keep me on the straight and narrow as he did for the thirty years we were friends. He was the best. I dedicated my fourth book to him and still miss his company. I guess I’m fortunate in that once I week we can be together. 😁 Thanks for asking, Resa. (You are the only one who has.)
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You’re welcome!
It’s obvious from the conversations that he is a piece of you, but not you. I sensed something, someone close.
He sounds like an important person in your life, and I too, am glad you are together once a week. 🥰
So, I think you are right about Foghorn. I’m now thinking the reason he was always trying to get that dog out of the dog house (besides watching him choke at the end of the leash), was to use the dog’s bathroom.
Be well, John!
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I loved the phrase “A piece of you buy not you.” You may be right about Foghorn’s motivation. I hope you have a peaceful Sunday.
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Same to you, Dear John!
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🤗
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My friend’s sister called her out recently for refusing to bag her own groceries. She shared a meme to her page of a lil chihuahua dog dressed to the nines with the caption “You’ve mistaken me as someone who works here” lol, too funny that I see that meme and your post on the same day.
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That is a funny meme. Thanks, Jill.
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Ha ha ha! You are right John. We need a little levity in our lives to offset the seriousness. That is not a bad thing.
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I agree.
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This seems like a good evening to have corn on my breath. Or rye, I’m not picky.
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Yeah, I have barley on mine. Sorry about your tree.
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Haha! I remember the good old days when fake news was limited to The National Enquirer.
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Ha ha ha. 😁
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Haha! I knew he would show up 😉
As for the bagging… hell, our grocery stores – well some of them, DON’T have baggers and you have to do it yourself… How about them apples?
Happy Sunday (I’m late!)
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Yes, how about them apples. Thanks, Dale.
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😉
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😊
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John, we prefer bagging our own groceries because, unlike those who have been hired to do so (including cashiers who have been tasked to be baggers as well), very few seem to have grasped the concept of cold food and non-cold food separation. Ice cream and bread in the same bag…that sort of thing. Foghorn is an iconic, all-time comic character!
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I always like all the heavy cans and bottles in one bag that only makes it halfway to the house. Thanks, Bruce.
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A fun post! Most stores no longer have checkers, much less baggers. It’s becoming a DIY world. Great response to the prompt!
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Yes indeed. gotta wonder where they all went.
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I appreciate these conversations. They are like little lessons on character. Makes me wanta dig into my own characters’ pasttimes to see what I can learn.
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Maybe a good idea. Would be interesting I’m sure.
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Serious fun to tamp down the seriousness in our world, John. Thanks for the smiles. And there’s nothing better than “getting this discussion bagged and heading for the pub” right? Cheers!
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Thank you, Lauren.
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Brilliant featuring of Foghorn, John. So does this mean that you made up the bagging introduction or has the world seriously gone that mad?
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Yes unless noted 100% of what I talk about on Saturday is made up. It was a parody on sensitivity.
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I thought so, but just wanted to be sure. The world has gone mad so anything is possible.
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Yeah, It’s good to check the way things are. 😁
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I say, I say there, boy, you nailed Foghorn Leghorn. Yes, serious problems need humor.
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Thank you, Jennie.
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You’re welcome, John.
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😊
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