Listening for the last wheeze that indicates the life fluid machine is finished with the ground, hot water soak, and dispensing procedure that has to proceed the soothing effects of the brew. Cup to lips and several long draughts release the brain from fog and rain.
Now enlightened, the first thought turns to the three-and-a-half-ton safe still half buried in the backyard. Google has no response to the typed words, How do I remove a Mosler safe from my back yard? If Google doesn’t have an answer, there may be no good way to get it done. Just at the point of needing another cup, my phone alerts me to a message from the Ring doorbell camera. I peer at the image but realize the sun is at such an angle that recognition is impossible. “Who’s there?” is my inquiry through the speaker system.
“Open the door and find out,” my guest replies.
My sigh carries throughout the house as the unlock procedure begins. Iron gate lifted, Iron bar pulled back, concertina wire coiled, claymore mines unarmed, machine guns shut off, boiling oil disengaged, Trebuchet unarmed, Bolts thrown and locks undone. Finally, the front door is thrown open, and there stands the guy who looks like Yosemite Sam.
“You know how to get that safe out of the backyard?”
“Yup.”
“Can you tell me how?”
“How.”
“Very funny. You some kind of dimwit?”
“Well, I’m not the dad burned city slicker with a safe in my backyard, don’t you know.” With that, he hands me an envelope, turns, and runs around the corner of the house. Too exhausted to follow, I open the envelope and see it is from Linda Hill. It says, Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “ring.” Use it as a noun or a verb. Bonus points if you use it as both. Have fun!
If you want this kind of fun, visit Linda’s blog and read how. Here’s the link. https://lindaghill.com/2022/09/16/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-sept-17-2022/
Ring by John W. Howell © 2022
“When you going to drop this Yosemite character?”
“Why. Don’t you like him?
“Sure I do, but we need some headway here. Week after week of a safe, and Sam don’t ring bells with me.”
“You are just one person.”
“Look out there. A lot of head nodding.”
“We can’t see out there. So why ring my bell today?”
“Well, I guess because it’s the only bell around here to ring.”
“That doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. Why do you have to ring a bell anyway?”
“I don’t know. I just get a ring urge.”
“Since I think we’ve covered the prompt enough what game are we watching today?”
“I want to watch the Baylor Bears ring the bell of the Texas State Bobcats.”
“Who are the Bobcats?”
“Be nice. What about you?”
“Wouldn’t mind checking in with the Notre Dame/California game.”
“Notre Dame took a hit last week.”
“Careful. I graduated from there.”
“Still, talk about a bell ring.”
“Maybe we should tune into the West Virgina University/Towson game.”
“That is pretty obscure.”
“WVU is The Producers Alma Mater.”
“Oh. She going to be with us.”
“No.”
“Hard pass then.”
“Cruel man.”
“I think we better get to the pub and grab a good seat.”
“You buying.”
“Yup I’ll tell the cashier to ring it on my tab.”
“I like the ring of that.”
“Let’s stop now. We are starting to overdo it.”
“I’m calling Uber.”
Fiction Favorites 
It’s a very short leap from caffeine to IPA. Some days that’s for the best. At least nobody caught ringworm.
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Ha ha ha. Good one, Craig. 😁
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Reblogged this on NEW BLOG HERE >> https:/BOOKS.ESLARN-NET.DE.
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Thank you for sharing the post today, Michael.
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Beautiful, John! I also love the introducing story so much. Thanks for sharing, and enjoy a beautiful weekend! xx Michael
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Enjoy a beautiful weekend as well, Michael. Thank you for your thoughts on the post.
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Loved the humor here.
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Thank you, Charles.
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This was great, John! Happy Saturday song to the tune of Ring of Fire 🔥 by Johnny Cash.😉
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Great song. Thank you, Jill. Happy Saturday to you *sung to the tune of Ring my Bell by Anita Ward.
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No offense, and not that I want a safe to land in my back yard, but I felt very good for Marshall last week. When WVU used to kick off their season against Marshall, the the Thundering Herd often gave us trouble. Good job on the prompt!
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No offense taken.
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I enjoy the Yosemite Sam character. It’s rather like watching Saturday morning cartoons when I was a kid. Great job. I was not clicking on any cylinders this morning.
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Glad you like Sam, Maggie.
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I’ve become quite a fan of Yosemite Sam and that safe, John. Keep going, his name has a nice ring to it and he is running rings around you which is most entertaining.
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Thank you, Robbie. 😁
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Good one, John. Yosemite Sam sure rings a bell with me, revives pleasant memories of Saturday mornings before the chores were assigned. Thanks a heap. 🙂
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Glad I brought up a memory, Tim. 😊
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(Shakes head) John, John, John… LOL. I’d try to contribute but all the rings this morning have my ears ringing. More coffee. 😉 Hugs on the wing.
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They will stop ringing before long. Hugs and thanks, Teagan.
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Whew! After all that, my head is spinning and my ears are ringing.
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I’ll take that as a good thing, Liz. 😁
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Yep, a good thing, 😀
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😊
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I haven’t been here for a few SoCS, but it doesn’t surprise me that Yosemite Sam and a backyard safe are in your post. Makes total sense to me, John. Cheers!
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Ha ha ha. Thanks, Mary.
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He knows how but he’s not helping? I’ll wRing his neck!
Fun, as always.
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Good thing to do. WRing his neck. Thanks, Dale
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A little cheat to stand out…😉
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😁
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Well! Sam has been of no help in regards to getting rid of the safe.
A couple of ideas here. Can you turn it into some type of flower planter? OR What about heaping mud on it and making a small grassy hill with some wild flowers that the puma could hide behind?
Last idea – Can you dig out earth around it, and somewhat under it, until it sinks enough to be covered with faux grass or stones?
I have no degree in engineering, and the only ring around here is the one in my tub! 🐂
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I like that last idea for sure. I think it would be easier than trying to lift it out of the yard. A tub ring is better than no ring.😁
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Well, good luck with that!
Maybe…. but what can I actually do with a tub ring?
Are they worth anything? 💋 Cripes, the O X is right behind the 💋
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Let me think. A tub ring is not worth much except as a reminder of the bath. The 🐂 ought to pass the 💋
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Ya think? The sponge has fallen back.
Of course, when I get my new shipment of sponges to mop up Marina’s dog’s kisses, watch out! That sponge will be all over the 🐂 & the 💋.
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This could be the grand prix of emojis
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You are on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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🇨🇦 🇺🇸
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💋💋⚡️💥🐂🧽 HA!
Don’t count the sponges out! Marina posts tomorrow, and Hera will be there!
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I’ll have to visit.
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I’m going to tell her! She’s not going to be thrilled with 🐂 & 💋 getting ahead of 🧽s!
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I can imagine.
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Ha!!!
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😊
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That made me laugh.
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I’m glad, Pamela.
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LOL! “Can you tell me how?” “How.” this line may or may not have caused a snort laugh. Another great post all around. Go Irish!
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Thank you, Jill. Watching the game now.
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None of the sports references ring a bell for me John, but if you can get the door open again, have fun at the pub, watching the game. 🙂
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That is okay. Thanks for the comment. The game is terrific.
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This was great, John, and Yosemite Sam is always fun! Enjoy the pub, but don’t ring too much on your tab. 🍻😁
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Thank you, Lauren. 😊
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Fun as always.one can never tire of Yosemite Sam.
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He is endearing for sure. Thanks, Denise.
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Another good one, John. I kinda like Yosemite Sam, but then there’s the issue of the safe. Hope your teams won!
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They did. Thanks, Jan
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As soon as I saw the prompt, I knew it was right up your alley, starting with the doorbell. Well done! I for one see no need to push Sam or the safe out of your Saturday post. Did WVU win?
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They did as did Notre Dame and Baylor.
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😀
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😁
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