The coffee firm in my hand and a stroll to the backyard brings me face to face with Wile E Coyote. “How’s it going?” He looks up from the plunger. “Ready whenever you are.” This causes me to wonder how I got to be in charge of the signal for detonation. Waving my hand, I do a Pontius Pilot maneuver.” It is your job” He goes to one knee again, placing his hand on the t-bar slide. “I just thought you wanted to give the go-ahead.” Turning abruptly, a shout of “no” goes over my shoulder while heading for the house and taking cover under the heaviest sofa.
The sound of the C-4 being set free causes my molars to crack in the subsequent teeth clench. The vibration moves me like a basketball being dribbled in the NBA. The separation between me and the couch is complete just as a deathly quiet settles over the room. There is nothing compelling me to look through the shattered windows other than the distant sound of emergency vehicles sounding like a herd of cats.
Courage restored a look at the backyard brings to mind what a volcano must look like when first being born. A vast hole and at least six feet of dirt and turf surrounding it are where the safe used to be. It looks like Wile’s plan from the standpoint of moving the safe is complete. My mind immediately goes to the question, Where did it go?
To find out, processing through the security shutdown sequence and throwing open the front door is done. Wile is standing next to his flatbed truck which also harbors a smoking safe. My stunned expression must have brought some satisfaction to Wile since he smiles and hands me an envelope. He climbs up into the truck and waves goodbye. As he drives off, I can see the door of the safe open like a hatch on a tank, and Sam’s head slowly appear. Waving to Sam brings nothing in return but an obscene sign with his upraised fist. Sighing with relief and looking forward to being alone in my element, I open the envelope. Inside were two things. The first is Wile’s bill, and the second a note from Linda Hill. It reads. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “element.” Use it any way you’d like. Have fun!
If you would like to have fun, visit Linda’s blog and read how. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2022/10/28/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-29-2022/
Element by John W. Howell © 2022
“You just squeaked that prompt one in.”
“Yes, but don’t tell anyone.”
“Who am I going to tell?”
“Are you kidding me? You have a pack of fans.”
“A pack? Having fans is a little out of my element.”
“Oh, come on. You love it.”
“How do you know I have fans.”
“See the comment section down there?”
“Yeah.”
“Every week, someone wants to know more about you.”
“You’re kidding.”
“No. There is an element of danger in you that some people find attractive.”
“Danger?”
“Yup.”
“Like what kind of danger?”
“You seem to be single.”
“Well, yeah.”
“No visible means of support.”
“Okay.”
“Drinks a lot.”
“Guilty.”
“All in all, a very dangerous fellow.”
“I see what you mean. Folks like that?”
“Hey, any man who drinks all the time can’t be all bad.”
“Who said that?”
“Well, the element of drinking was espoused by W.C. Fields.”
“Sounds like a good element.”
“You finished with the discussion about fans?”
“For now. Let’s turn to VooDoo Ranger.”
“You’re buying?”
“Yup. You got the Uber.”
“On it.”
Fiction Favorites 
Reblogged this on NEW BLOG HERE >> https:/BOOKS.ESLARN-NET.DE.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for sharing, Michael.
LikeLike
Beautiful, John! By the way, i love your great expressive sentences like “The separation between me and the couch is complete just as a deathly quiet settles over the room.” A novel by itself. 😉 Best wishes, Michael
LikeLiked by 4 people
Thank you, Michael. You are very kind. 😁
LikeLike
Great work with the prompt, John and I’m glad you survived the safe removal. Not all of Wile’s plans work out so well. I hope that bill leaves room in the budget for your friend “with no visible means of support.”
LikeLiked by 3 people
Ha ha ha. The friend happens to be in oil so at least for now although invisible he has support. Thanks, Dan.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I read this before coffee so it too me a minute to shake the image of a toilet plunger 🪠 out of my mind. Obviously I am not yet in my element. I am going back to read your last two episodes of SOCS I missed. Have a great weekend, John.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Maggie. I’m not sure where that image came from. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
It is a dark journey trying to understand my thought process.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Usually comes out well though.
LikeLike
The “element of drinking” takes the prompt in places few could have imagined. Very clever, John. I hope the weather elements treat you kindly this weekend, especially with Halloween fast approaching. 🍂🎃 🍂
LikeLiked by 1 person
They are forecasting for sunny and coolish (low 80s) temperatures for Halloween. Should be nice.
LikeLike
C-4 explosion is certainly one way to start the weekend.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, and now no windows in the house.
LikeLike
Well, at least the safe is gone from the back yard! A successful Wile E. Coyote endeavor”? Will wonders never cease!
LikeLiked by 2 people
I thought that would be different. Now about those windows.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Oh, right, those shattered windows . . .
LikeLiked by 1 person
Still cleaning up the glass.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Impressive aim! I’m going to miss Sam. You never disappoint my friend. I’m still smiling.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you, Pamela. I’m so glad you enjoyed it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You didn’t play it . . . wait for it . . safe with this prompt, Boss. You should be the next “Most Interesting Man In The World” for Dos Equis and I ain’t kidding.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ha ha ha. Thanks, Pilgrim. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s some major teeth clenching! Good one, John!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Happy Saturday to you, Jill *Sung to the tune of Monster Mash by Bobby Pickett.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Perfect!
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊
LikeLike
Glad the safe hit the truck. I was afraid Sam would wind up in orbit with Duck Dodgers.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ha ha ha
LikeLiked by 1 person
I wonder who will invade your property next. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Tune in next week. I’m sure there will be someone or something.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yippee
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
You know what I’ve been thinking during the evolution of this series? It’s how your fabulously written (seriously wonderful prose here) intros have replaced your Wednesday story. Very smart of you.
Plus, an excellent way of slipping in the prompt. Love it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Dale. You have made me blush. This series allows me to practice a first person narrative without using “I.” 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Blush away, John. I’ve been wanting to tell you for weeks. Your practising has been garnering wonderful results! 🙂
LikeLike
Aww. Big hug for you. 🤗
LikeLiked by 1 person
Right back at ya, my friend. 🤗
LikeLiked by 1 person
😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great finish to the safe house predicament, John, told with an element of craziness. 🙂 I don’t think Daniel Espinosa could match it.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ha ha ha. Thank you, Tim 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
LikeLiked by 3 people
😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank Goodness you finally got rid of the safe and those two retobates 💜💜💜
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes We did. Now for the clean-up.
LikeLike
I send Vlad over to help 🎃
LikeLiked by 1 person
I need him.
LikeLike
He’s on his way now 😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh Good cause 26 windows are blown out. (actually blown in.)
LikeLike
He is bringing his cousin who’s a glazier 🎉🎃
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh good. Thank you, Willow.
LikeLike
🤭🤭
LikeLiked by 1 person
😁
LikeLike
We have met the enemy…and they are gone thank God…so let’s rent a dumpster and get to work getting our house in order.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha ha. Thank you, Bruce.
LikeLiked by 1 person
A Pontius Pilot maneuver—I didn’t see that one coming. 🤣
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s quite an introduction, John. But you seem to be in your element. And your fans agree. 🙂
LikeLike
Thanks, Diana. It is an exercise in trying to get better at first person narrative without using the pronoun “I”
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hard to do!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Does take some work for sure.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Whew! I was worried about the plunger, but it worked to get the safe to the truck. And Pontius Pilot, that was excellent! But, there is a disaster to clean up.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Much glass and plaster.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I imagine so…
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Whew! Finally that safe is gone, and hopefully gone for good. 🙂 Great use of the prompt!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. Yes hopefully gone for good.
LikeLike
Something’s not right? Wile’s plan worked. You were dribbled like a basketball, but no bones are broken, and the safe didn’t crash through your roof and land on you.
I’m not convinced that Wile is going to succeed, in the end, esp. with Sam freed from the safe.
You’d better pay Wile’s bill asap. He’s going to need the cash for the hospital.
You lead a dangerous life, John!
🐂💋🐂💋
LikeLiked by 1 person
I do live a dangerous life for sure. Thank you, Resa 🐂💋🐂💋
LikeLiked by 1 person
🐂💋🐂💋
LikeLike
🐂💋🐂💋💣
LikeLiked by 1 person
WELL!
Although I’m sure you mean that in the good way. Like… She’s da bomb!
🐂💋🍷🍷🍷🍷🐂💋 (drunk on love)
LikeLiked by 1 person
You got the meaning exactly.🐂💋🍷🍷🍷🍷🐂💋
LikeLiked by 1 person
LikeLike
Spill the wine for sure.
LikeLiked by 1 person
So erotic….
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yup. 😁🍷
LikeLiked by 1 person
…. hypnotic…
LikeLiked by 1 person
That too. 🍷 Naked to the world.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am? 🍷
LikeLiked by 1 person
Not sure. The song says so. 🍷
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well, okay….. if it’s in the song! 🍷🍷
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes the song. 🍷🍷🍷
LikeLike
[…] Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – “Element” […]
LikeLike