
This post, co-authored by Marie Bailey, ran on November 6, 2013. Since people still commute to work, it should be relevant.
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Top Ten Things Not to do When Commuting to Work by Car
10 When commuting to work by car, do not apply mascara or use an electric razor while driving. If you do, at best, you’ll have smudges or missed spots. At worse, you might wind up with a mascara brush sticking out of your eye or a long shave up the side of the head as you slam on the brake to avoid hitting the car in front of you. (Good luck at the meeting.)
9 When commuting to work by car don’t drive like James Dean in Rebel Without a Cause. If you do, at best, you’ll just wind up stopped at the next intersection. At worst, you’ll wind up alongside the road being attended to by a traffic officer eager to make his quota early and being on display for all the folks you passed.
8 When commuting to work by car, try not to listen to state or national news on your radio. If you do listen, at best, you will need to breath deeply. At worst, your fellow commuters will call the local police thinking all those expletives were signs of a nervous breakdown. (Sitting in the back of a police care sure makes those news stories seem insignificant don’t they?)
7 When commuting to work by car, do not think you are encouraging the driver ahead of you to go faster by following them so closely that you can see yourself in their rear view mirror. If you do, at best, the driver ahead makes no sudden stops. At worst, they quickly step on the brake and cause you to rear-end them. (Don’t even try to argue the point of who’s fault this accident is. You know it’s yours.)
6 When commuting to work by car, do not try to eat your breakfast and drive at the same time. If you do, at best, you’ll just gross people out when they see you stuff a double-Egg McMuffin in your mouth. At worst, the coffee you start to sip will wind up all over your nice white shirt or blouse when you suddenly have to step on the brake to avoid hitting someone pulling out of a McDonald’s in front of you. (Seemed like a good idea while in the drive through.)
5 When commuting to work by car, avoid the temptation to pick your nose, pop a pimple, or check your teeth while waiting for a green light. If you can’t avoid the temptation, At best, no one will see you. At worst, the other commuters viewing your activities will be attending customer meeting that you have scheduled that morning. (Too bad you grossed out your important customers)
4 When commuting to work by car, do not try to read The Wall Street Journal or finish reading the last chapter of the book you can’t put down. If you do, at best, you are fully aware of surrounding traffic. At worst, you’ll never get to finish the book because the traffic cop saw you reading, pulled you over, and then confiscated your book (How were you to know it was on his TBR list?)
3 When commuting to work by car, do not think there will be no traffic when you’re running 15 minutes late for a meeting with the CEO of your company. If you do, at best, you make all the lights. At worse, the city utility vehicles will be out in full force, trimming trees and picking up yard waste on every street that is normally part of your commute. (Your commute time is double and your chances of being fired triple)
2 When commuting to work by car, do check your text messages before you get to your office. At best, you’ll have some near-misses as commuters try to get around you and put distance between your bad driving and theirs. At worst, the same traffic cop that pulled you over in #4 and #9 will be more than happy to pull you over again since you are single-handedly helping the officer meet a quota.
1. When commuting to work by car, do not treat your driving as a right, but rather as a privilege which can be taken away at any moment for bad behavior. If you do, at best, you’ll rack up more fines and fees in a month than you pay in car insurance in a year. At worst, bad driving can lead to bad things happening to other people or to you. (Be mindful. Be aware. Drive safely)




























