I was waiting in line to use the ATM machine outside my favorite Starbucks. The line was agonizingly slow, and I could feel the little caffeine-deprived miner trying to pickax his way out of the front of my skull. The little pick, pick, pick feeling got stronger as the next customer seemed to be […]

  I was sitting on the front porch this morning enjoying the sun and the long-running chatter of the mockingbird. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I detected some movement. Sure enough, a large truck turned into the cul-de-sac and stopped in front of my house. The driver blew his air horn which, […]

    I was lounging in the backyard, thinking pure thoughts about the world at large. All of a sudden, I heard what sounded like a police whistle, and a guy who looked like the McDonald’s Hamburgerler jumped over the fence and landed flat-footed in front of me. “May I help you?” I said. His […]

  I had just finished my coffee and was looking at an enormous weed that had grown overnight on the lawn. All of a sudden, a  little shadow was starting to spread around the weed. Looking up, I could see a still small square getting larger by the second. My brain finally clicked and realized […]

  I just got up and went to the window to see what all the chirping was about. I looked out on the back lawn, and there was a box sitting in the middle of the yard. There must have been a hundred birds all jumping up and down and all around the box. I […]

Celebrate freedom. Happy Juneteenth. It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again, and I was laying outback on the chaise lounge thinking of what kind of pasta to make for dinner. When the idea of an amatriciana sauce popped into my head, I was also hit in the same spot with a falling box. I […]

  I had just finished digging out my olive tree and sat down to have a cold drink of tea. All of a sudden, the United States Postal Service person leaned on the front doorbell. The bell is right above a sign that says PLEASE DO NOT RING DOORBELL.  I finally got Twiggy off the ceiling […]

    I was walking back from the store and heard the screech of vehicle brakes behind me. I turned around and came face to face with the FedEx van. I have to say maybe a FedEx van doesn’t have a face, but it sure seemed that way to me. Anyway, the driver tossed a […]

  I was having a wannabe productive day yesterday. I was thinking of maybe raking the leaves and mowing the lawn. I got out the lawnmower and gave it a tug. It started in one pull, so I knew something was wrong. As I walked behind (yes, it is self-propelled. I’m 80 years old, so […]