Top Ten Things Not to Do at a Corporate Team Building Event

June 30, 2025June 29, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 83 Comments

This post was published on October 20, 2014. Since corporation are still holding these events it might be useful.

10 If your company is having a team building event, do not think your team relationships will last. If you do, at best, you will be seen as weak and someone to avoid. At worst, the next promotion will go to your new friend who explained to the boss how needy you are.

9 If your company has a team building event, do not fall for the old trust building exercise. If you do, at best, your trust will not be reciprocated. At worst, you will place your trust in someone who in the end wants to see you dead.

8 If your company has a team building event, do not get paired with the boss. If you do, at best, you will get low grades for being too subservient. At worst, your boss will think you are not made of the stuff originally thought and will introduce you to the meaning of the phrase persona non grata.

7 If your company has a team building event, do not believe the idea is to have fun. If you do, at best, you will be the only one. At worst, the note taker will immediately label you as someone who does not take work seriously.

6 If your company has a team building event, do not believe the wearing apparel instructions. If you do, at best, you and the company psychologist will be the only ones dressed in jeans and sweatshirt. At worst, the biggest boss on the planet will drop by the exercise to see how it is going and will inquire of your boss, “who’s the other psychologist?”

5 If your company has a team building event, do not try to be the best player in the skill competition. If you are, at best, your boss will believe you have too much time on your hands. At worst, your boss will appoint you as team leader for the next team building event.

4 If your company has a team building event, do not think the free food and drinks are on an all you can eat buffet. If you do, at best, you will be seen as someone who is obviously lacking self-control. At worst, your boss will wonder if you always take advantage of the company expense account and inform finance to conduct an audit of your expenses.

3 If your company has a team building event, do not think the truth hour is for telling the truth. If you do, at best, you and the company psychologist will become simpatico. At worst, your boss will be counting the moments until you and they will be alone so that the longer term franchise you were counting on can be terminated.

2 If your company has a team building event, do not try to bring any new ideas during creative hour. If you do, at best, your peers will poke enough holes in your idea to kill it. At worst, thinking outside the box will only convince your boss that perhaps your belongings should be in a similar container and both of you escorted out by security.

1 If your company has a team building event do not sing along when the psychologist puts the Queen CD in the player and “We Are the Champions”starts playing. If you do, at best, your co-workers will think you are a throwback to the 80s. At worst, your boss loves “We Are the Champions” and your off note singing is making the neck hair stand up which will be a reminder to ask HR to have you transferred to Guam before the next team building event.

Views of the Neighborhood – Lakeway Farmer’s Market

June 29, 2025June 28, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 95 Comments

Today, we are going to check out the Lakeway Farmers Market, which is a once-a-week happening during the summer. We are catered by Acre 41 of Austin. Our entertainment is Annie Ross

Eggs Your Way – bacon or sausage, breakfast potatoes, toast

Spinach & Mushroom Egg White Omelet – havarti, breakfast potatoes, toast

Smoked Ham & Pinmento Cheese Omelet – house pimento cheese, breakfast potatoes, toast

Tres Leches French Toast – strawberries, powdered sugar, whipped cream

Wagyu Flat Iron & Eggs – eggs your way, breakfast potatoes

Huevos Rancheros – sunny egg, crispy tortilla, black bean, avocado, jalapeno, queso fresco

Sausage & Egg Burrito – chicken sausage, queso chihuahua, pepperjack, salsa roja

Thick Bacon Benedict t – hollandaise, english muffin, asparagus, poached eggs

Salmon Poke Bowl l – maitake, edamame, cucumber, avocado, ponzu, sushi rice

14 oz Prime Rib – natural beef jus, horseradish cream, fries

We are taking the minibus today. Don’t worry, there is plenty of room. Let’s go.

This shot gives you an idea of the layout.

Jewelry and other stuff.

These guys sell meat.

Amy’s art glass.

Music to spend money by.

Yum. Fresh bagels.

Authentic Mexican baked goods. (No, she is not selling Dios)

Authentic Mexican salsas.

A 3D printed collectables stand.

Asian Dumplings of all kinds.

Homemade pet treats.

Puzzle candles.

Forever jewelry. A concept I’m still struggling to understand.

Eggs, raw milk, and candy.

A 1937 Pontiac Special Delux.

Hand-dipped incense.

Fresh bread.

And finally, some healthy vegetables and melons.

Time now to relax with the food and music. I hope you have a terrific week.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – “Plug”

June 28, 2025June 27, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 89 Comments

My need for a direct infusion of caffeine was met with a cold, dark touchscreen on the coffee machine. Puzzled, the haze-filled investigation began. Hitting reset-no help. Checking the line trip – no help. Calling the electric company – no help. Sitting on hold at the manufacturer – no help. Finally, speaking with a customer service representative who asked the definitive question, “Did you check the plug?” The plug? Does this person think they are talking to a moron? The plug? How flipping insulting can one get? Reminds me of talking to a WordPress Happiness Engineer. The plug? For crying out loud, of course I checked . . .the . . .plug. “Thank you for your help, customer Service person. I’ve got it from here.”

WHO UNPLUGGED THE COFFEE MACHINE? was the question heard round the block. Of course, there was no answer. Once plugged in, my 8-oz crema-topped brew was available for the inhaling. The first sip was also accompanied by the reverberations of the Westminster chime from the front doorbell. These were instantly joined by the baying of Egor’s hounds, also known as Twiggy and Tempeste. The toss of a knuckle bone into the soundproof room and a door slam brought the sound of silence to this tortured space. Looking at the front door camera, I see something that looks like an Empire Stormtrooper. “State your business,” was the order through the intercom. “Package for Howell,” came the reply. “Just drop it there.” “Sorry, sir, but it needs a signature.”

With a sigh, the security system shutdown process has begun. The SWAT team needs to be put on standby. A quick text to the leader confirms that status. Also, the flight of A-10 Warthogs must be diverted. Another call to the commander puts that worry to rest. The SEAL team needs to be called off, and a call to the leader makes that possible. The control panel makes the shutdown of the security system process simpler. The boiling oil vats are put on standby, the turret mortars disengaged, the Trebuchet on safety, the concertina wire rolled, the Claymore mines reset, the tower Gatling guns on safety, the moat net dropped, the alligators fed, the IEDs and shoulder-held rockets put away. The Proton torpedoes switched off. The locks on the door are thrown. And the door opened.

“What is a Stormtrooper doing delivering packages?”

“A side hustle. Sign here.”

With formalities finished, the stormtrooper jumps on what looks like a motorcycle with no wheels and is gone. The package has a note from Linda Hill and a package of Sweetarts. The note reads: Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “plug.” Use it as a noun, use it as a verb, use it any way you’d like. Have fun!

To see what others have done with the prompt, visit Linda Hill’s post. Here’s the link. https://lindaghill.com/2025/06/27/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-28-2025/

“A stormtrooper?”

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Oh, I don’t know. People like cartoon characters.”

“Well, there wasn’t one there. Your plug for the readers is admirable.”

“I suppose it is funny in a way.”

“Can you imagine seeing one on your porch?”

“Didn’t stay long.”

“You know how those delivery people are. No time for social interaction.”

“I would tell Linda Hill to stop requesting a signature.”

“Maybe some day.”

“We going to the pub?”

“Duh. What do we do every Saturday? Uber?”

“Right over there.”

“Hey, now we are talking.”

“We can put the top down, but there is just one thing.”

“As usual. What is it?”

“We have to go along on a cross-country road race.”

“Road race to where?”

“Not far.”

“How far?”

“Connecticut.”

“We need a different car.”

“Oh, come on. How many road races have you been on?”

“None.”

“Well, it’s time to plug into the sport. Here’s your helmet. Let’s go.”

“It’ll take us a week.”

“Yup, that’s why I have this cooler of VooDoo Rangers. About a week’s supply, I figure.”

“Unless I decide to drink enough to end my misery.”

“I don’t think there are enough VooDoo Rangerson the planet to do that.”

“Alright, I’m in.”

Friday JohnKu – AKA -TGIF – Fri-Yay/Good News

June 27, 2025June 26, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 57 Comments

Experimental farm uses innovative method to save over a billion gallons of water: ‘If we can do it here, we can do it anywhere’

Today’s good news story comes from the TCD newsletter and was sent to me by Noelle Granger

Experimental farm uses innovative method to save over a billion gallons of water: ‘If we can do it here, we can do it anywhere’

Rick Kazmer

A cutting-edge farming technique being implemented on an experimental ranch in Arizona’s Sonoran Desert has already saved a billion gallons of water over five years, according to Civil Eats, a news site covering America’s food system.

The water conservation is impressive considering the region was experiencing well over 100 degree heat in spring along with a drought. The National Park Service reported that the average temperature during the three summer months has increased 4 degrees Fahrenheit since 1950 because of the overheating planet.

On the 665-acre Oatman Flats Ranch, the team is using special techniques to sustain wheat, barley, and other crops despite the brutal conditions.

“I joke that this farm is a little better than Death Valley, but I’m not really joking,” farm director Yadi Wang said.

The ranch is implementing regenerative organic farming in answer to drying rivers and arid, nutrient-poor dirt. The goal is to improve soil health and biodiversity as well as to limit water use and capture planet-warming carbon with vegetation. Started in 2021, the project has earned accolades and is considered a learning site by the Regenerative Organic Alliance, per Civil Eats.

Regenerative farming uses a mix of strategies, including Indigenous methods dating back thousands of years, to better manage farmland. They include crop rotation, vegetative cover, rotational grazing, and eliminating toxic pesticides and fertilizers, according to the alliance.

Natural fertilizers, for example, have already proved successful at providing bountiful harvests as part of other projects, including tomato research in Italy.

In the Arizona desert, farmers are also dealing with unprecedented droughts. NASA and other experts have linked planetary warming, caused largely by burning fossil fuels, to increased risks for water shortages and extreme weather events.

That’s on top of the poor soil quality, resulting from decades of neglect and conventional farming practices. As a result, the Oatman team is rebuilding irrigation systems, clearing invasive trees, and using other regenerative practices.

Water-conserving crops were added to combat drought and overdraw from nearby farms that grow acres of alfalfa and corn for feed and fuels. The land also got a healthy dose of manure, all according to Civil Eats.

Sheep are natural mowers that also leave fertilizing droppings. Other species that have long been absent are returning, including dragonflies. Wang said the insects are proof of the advancements in water conservation.

“If we’re going to hold on to farmland, we need a significant change in how we farm and what we farm,” ranch owner Dax Hansen added.

The effort is paying off. In addition to the water gains, the team has doubled healthy organic matter in the dirt.

It’s a mindset that can be applied in any environment at nearly any scale. At home, you can cultivate a sustainable backyard by letting nature take over. Natural lawns with native blooming plants can also boost local pollinator health. Government experts say that 35% of the world’s food supply is reliant on struggling pollinators.

In Arizona, the ranchers also have them in mind. They spent $100,000 on native hedgerows that also help to retain soil and provide habitat for bees, birds, and other species, according to Civil Eats.

The team intends to continue restoring farmland in the extreme conditions. The project has been bolstered by government funds, but the goal is for a sustainable, “financially viable” system, per Civil Eats.

“You’ve seen what the land looks like in five years; imagine it in 10,” Hansen said. “If we can do it here, we can do it anywhere.”

The good news in this story is that regenerative farming methods work. Today’s JohnKu talks about taking care of nature. I hope you have a lovely week.

Nature has a way,

To reward good stewardship . . .

She gives back in spades.

Thursday – A Little Personal – Tempeste takes a dive.

June 26, 2025June 25, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 105 Comments

So Tempeste, I’ve put water in the pool. Get in.”

“Let me take a look. Is Twiggy coming out?”

“Sure, go ahead. It’s just water. No Twiggy, she’d pass.”

“That’s okay. More room for me. Let’s see what we have here.”

“Well?”

“Yup. It’s water for sure. Nice and cool too.”

“Do you want a toy?”

“Mmmm. I don’t think so. There is a leaf in here, and I think I will get it.”

“Why did you get out?”

“I think there should be a little more water in there. Seems pretty shallow.”

“Okay. Have a drink too.”

“This is cute, but I was thinking of way more water than this.”

“How’s that?”

“Now you’re talking.”

“Say when.”

“Yeah, I think that is enough.”

“What are you doing now?”

“What I always do. Testing the strength of the material.”

“Looks pretty strong to me.”

“Mmerfff. I agree. Not going to be able to tear this up today.”

“I don’t think you’ll be able to drag it either.”

“It does weigh a lot.”

“How about just playing in the water?”

“Yeah, sounds good. Watch me dive.”

A Message from Me to You

June 25, 2025June 25, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 74 Comments

I have been blogging for thirteen years and have loved every minute. I originally started because I needed a platform to showcase my novels. Well, I have published eight of them and must confess that I have seldom used this blog to showcase them. Yes, when a blog tour came up, I focused on presenting those gracious enough to host me, but I have resisted the continuous “buy my book” message.

I can honestly say that my blog has been primarily for reader entertainment, not book promotions. So, with that in mind, I’m not going to change my basic blogging philosophy, which is Laughs Are Us. Instead, I have partnered with BookBub and established an Author website. There, I can brag all I want about my fine writing and talk about needing a new pair of shoes without worrying about offending my regular readers.

The site also allows me to trade free stuff for emails, leading to more free stuff and hopefully terrific information.

If you feel inclined here is the link to my author place. https://johnhowellauthor.com/ If you also feel inclined to sign up for my gossip sheet, there is a free Writer’s Digest award-winning short story in it for you. So, come see what it looks like, and sadly, there are no free drinks, but that could change someday.

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Finger Point prompt – Departure

June 24, 2025June 23, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 48 Comments

Today, I opened the second book in the Eternal Road series: The Last Drive randomly to page 119 and pointed with my eyes closed. The word closest to my finger is “departure.” This is our prompt today.

“Do you have everything?”

“I think so.”

“Do we need to do a checklist?”

“Naw. I think I remembered everything.”

“This is a big step in life for you. How do you feel?”

“I’m a little nervous but am looking forward to learning more.”

“It seems like yesterday that you were so small.”

“Yeah, but now I’m fully grown.”

“Well, at least your body has grown. Your brain needs a little more time.”

“This is why you are sending me off, right?”

“Yes, dear. You cannot stay and continue to grow into a responsible adult. You need learning and experience that your dad and I can’t give you.”

“Well, I’m going to miss you both. Where is Dad anyway?”

“I don’t think he could stand to say goodbye, so he went fishing.”

“Yeah, I get that. Well, tell him goodbye, and I’ll see him later.”

“I will do that, my precious. Now spread those wings and get going. Don’t forget you are an eagle,. A bald eagle, so be proud of your heritage.”

“I won’t forget Mama. Goodbye. I love you.”

“I love you, son. Make us proud.”

“Mom, don’t cry.”

“Bitter sweet, my boy. Go now.”

Top Ten Things Not to Do When You Have Allergies

June 23, 2025June 22, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 66 Comments

This post was published on May 12, 2014, and co-authored by Marie Ann Bailey and me. Since allergies don’t seem to go away, I hope you find it useful.

Top Ten Things Not to Do When You Have Allergies

10 When you have allergies, do not offer to house sit for friends with animals. If you do, the best that will happen is that your sneezing will cause the animals to hide from you. At worst, you may find yourself in the ER on a respirator, trying to remember if you left the front door open.

9 When you have allergies, do not accept an offer to go for a nice ride in the country. If you do, at best, your nice ride will turn into a sneezing nightmare. At worst, your companion will leave you beside the road with your address written on a note pinned to your shirt.

8 When you have allergies, do not eat anything out unless you know the ingredients. If you do, at best, you may have to go home early to get some medicine. At worst, you might cause those around you concern as you begin to swell and turn purple as a reaction.

7 When you have allergies, do not volunteer to drive the hay wagon at the school fundraiser. If you do, at best, you will be the source of too many “bless you’s.” At worst, your sneezing will cause the horses to spook, allowing for a runaway wagon and terrified children and adults.

6 When you have allergies, do not leave home without a spare handkerchief or tissues. If you do, at best, you will need to use anything at hand to cover a sneezing fit. At worst, there will be nothing at hand, and you will cause everyone near you to run away in fear since they will assume you have the bubonic plague.

5 When you have allergies, do not think those who do not have allergies will understand your symptoms. If you do, at best, you may get some concerned looks when the sneezing hits. At worst, you might be trying to explain to the EMS team called by a well-meaning person that you are having an allergy attack.

4 When you have allergies, do not leave your medicine at home even for a short time. If you do, at best, you will get by without any symptoms. At worst, you will find yourself curled in the fetal position, praying to be spared another sneezing attack.

3. When you have allergies, do not think you can go on a picnic in the woods. If you do, at best, you will survive with only sneezing bouts. At worst, you will be stung by some strange insect and find you are slowly losing the ability to raise your arms to get your EPI-Pen.

2. When you have allergies, do not offer to deliver flowers on special holidays, no matter how heavily medicated you are. If you do, at best, you could have a reaction to an unknown flower. At worst, you could deliver only the stems after your sneezing caused all the blooms to fly off the bouquet.

1. When you have allergies and are heavily medicated, do not operate heavy machinery. If you do, at best, you may injure yourself. At worst, you may just take down one wall too many and have a boss who expects you to pay for the damage.

Views of the Neighborhood – Art Display at Lakeway City Hall – Char Michelson

June 22, 2025June 21, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 64 Comments

We are heading to Lakeway City Hall again to view a colorful display of Char Michelson’s artwork. We are catered by Hestia of Austin. Our entertainment is Chicago.

So let’s go

Here’s information on the artist.

A shot of the gallery.

None of the paintings is titled, so we will enjoy the work and maybe make up our own titles.

Lovely monuments in sandstone.

Flowers, pitcher, table, and wallpaper.

A rural scene.

Rolling countryside.

A hill that just begs for climbing.

A lovely vase filled with joy.

It is now time to relax and enjoy the music and food. I hope you have an easy week.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – “Jumble.”

June 21, 2025June 20, 2025 ~ John W. Howell ~ 80 Comments

The words on the coffee maker’s touchscreen are a jumble of disassociated letters. It appears as if the machine is having some kind of breakdown. My only thought is to reboot it and see if there is any improvement. The plug is pulled, and an almost imperceptible sigh is released deep inside the black box. Inserting the plug in the outlet brings the machine back to life. The words “Thank you” pop onto the screen briefly before the menu appears normally.

Being reminded of Gilda Radner’s SNL bit about Rosanne Rosanna Danna’s mantra of, “If it’s not one thing, it’s another. It’s always something,” the eight-ounce coffee selection is made. The first sip is heaven and a reminder to call the machine feelings doctor and get an appointment for an examination. The second sip is covered by the Westminster Chime cacophony of the doorbell. A quick toss of a chew toy into the soundproof room and a slam of the door returns the room to silence from the bone-cracking barking of Tempeste and Twiggy.

A look at the porch camera screen confirms that a person looking very much like Mike Tyson is glaring at the camera. “What do you want?” is the message. “Delivery for J. Howell came the answer.” “Just leave it.” A low growl through the speaker convinced me I had better open the door. The security system shutdown process has begun. The SWAT team needs to be put on standby. A quick text to the leader confirms that status. Also, the flight of A-10 Warthogs must be diverted. Another call to the commander puts that worry to rest. The SEAL team needs to be called off, and a call to the leader makes that possible. The control panel makes the shutdown of the security system process simpler. The boiling oil vats are put on standby, the turret mortars disengaged, the Trebuchet on safety, the concertina wire rolled, the Claymore mines reset, the tower Gatling guns on safety, the moat net dropped, the alligators fed, the IEDs and shoulder-held rockets put away. The locks on the door are thrown. And the door opened.

“You, Howell?” “Yes.” “Sign here or I will be forced to squeeze your head like a ripe cantaloupe.”

The letter is from Linda Hill, and after I sign and make a crack about great customer service, the guy turns to leave. “What, no tip?” he says. “Cross only on green,” is my retort. I slam the door and throw the locks. I open the letter, and it reads.

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “jumble.” Use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!

To see what others have done with the prompt, visit Linda Hill’s post. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2025/06/20/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-21-2025/

“No clock again?”

“Nope. History was a jumble of nothing going on. The only thing reported 100 years ago was a baseball game between the Ku Klux Klan of Kansas and a black semi-pro team.”

“Might have been interesting. Who won?”

“The black team.”

“Put a hole in superiority claims, I guess.”

“For sure.”

“Speaking of superior.”

“Let me guess. Time for VooDoo Rangers. Call Uber.”

“Already did. He’s right over there.”