Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Ham.”

February 18, 2017February 17, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 64 Comments

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It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday and time for another prompt from Linda Hill. This week’s prompt is “ham.” Yeah, you read that right. “ham.” The good news is Linda says we can use the word any way we want. Now let me think of the ways to use ham. Right now I’m thinking ham and swiss on rye. (I need to have some lunch) If you would like to participate in the fun, go to Linda’s blog and read all about how to do it. Here is the link. Oh and by the way, if you go there you will be able to see some other interpretations of the “ham” prompt. https://lindaghill.com/2017/02/17/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-feb-1817/

“Ham, ram, sheep, bull, beef or bear.”

“Huh?”

“You asked what was good on the menu.”

“I know but bear?”

“Hey fella this is the North Country. We love everything.”

“How do I order.? Ask for bear?”

“No silly. You look at the menu and decide what you want. Duh.”

“You are pretty cheeky for a server.”

“Watch it, Buster. See this fist?”

“Now no need for that. I just think servers should be more polite to customers.”

“Okay. I see that. Let me try again. Excuse me, sir?”

“Yes?”

“Would you be so kind as to look at the knuckles on my right hand and then tell me how they feel after meeting your nose.”

“I want the manager.”

“Don’t we all. He went hunting last week and didn’t come back.”

“Is the owner here?”

‘”Sure. Hold on.”

“Yessir, how can I help you?”

“You own the place?”

“Yup. The whole town too.”

“Oh. Well, this server just threatened me with a punch in the nose.”

“You don’t look like you been hit.”

“No, it was a threat, though.”

“Let me tell you, son. You are real lucky. Belle doesn’t usually threaten. Now, what can I get you?”

“What’s good?”

“Ham, ram, sheep, bull, beef, or …wait. We are out of bear.”

“What happened?”

“The manager went out to get some and never came back. I think he might have run afoul of a bear in the end.”

“Oh sorry.”

“Don’t be. We sell a lot of the other meats.

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #110 by Keith Channing

February 14, 2017February 13, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 26 Comments

Keith explains this prompt i n his own words. “Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; and either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithkreates@channing.fr before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here – pingbacks don’t often work.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, next Monday.”

Here is the photo.

Kreative Kue #110

A Trap by John W. Howell © 2107

“Just look at that set of goodies.”

“Sush. That bozo will hear you.”

“Nonsense. He’s too far away.”

“I have to say that is an excellent lineup. Why do you think he has all those bowls of fish on the ground?”

“He thinks we are stupid that’s why.”

“What do you mean?”

“He thinks just because we are cats we’re going to run right over there to try and grab a snack.”

“Well, aren’t we?”

“We need to wait. I have to think this one out.”

“What’s to think. We break out of these bushes and run like hell. Grab a fish and head under that table and out the back.”

“How do you know he hasn’t laid a bunch of traps?”

“I don’t see any.”

“Doesn’t mean a thing. Look at that ramshackle tent. I think it is a front for a trap.”

“Maybe you are right.”

“I mean just look at that fake looking signage on the table. Screams camouflage to me.”

“What should we do?”

“I think I have it. The plan I mean.”

“I hope you hurry my stomach is growling louder, and I’m sure he’s going to hear it.”

“Well, I think he suspects we are here anyway. Look how he is staring.”

“So what’s the plan.”

“Let’s just forget the fish.”

“I’m starving. I don’t like that option.”

“I mean. I count to three, and we rush the guy roaring all the while.”

“Oh, I get it. We scare him off then take the fish.”

“Not at all. We take him and beat it back to the bush and enjoy our lunch. I’ll grab his leg and drag him off.”

“Haven’t had human for a while. might be a good change of pace.”

“So, you in?”

“My mouth is watering already. What about the others?”

“Just show them your fangs and shake that mane while roaring. They’ll back off.”

Okay. Let’s go.’

“One, two….”

Saturday Stream of Consciousness – Prompt “So/Sow/Sew

February 11, 2017February 10, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 26 Comments

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So that you understand the nature of what is going on here, I have to quote Linda Hill on this week’s prompt. “Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “so/sow/sew.” Use one, use ’em all, use ’em any way you’d like. Bonus points if you start and end with any of them. Enjoy! So” I hope everyone noticed I began this post with “so.”

Now I ask you is this freedom or what? If you would like to join in the fun go to Linda’s post. Here is the link.

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Feb. 11/17

“So what are you up to today?”

“You noticed I’m deeply involved in this story.”

“I love stories. What is it?”

“It is about a young man who left his home to seek his fortune.”

“That sounds familiar what it the name.”

“Go West Young Man.”

“Hmmm. I’m familiar with the saying by Horatio Alger, but that title escapes me.”

“Cause I just put it on paper.”

“Oh. I get it. It is a story you are writing.”

“Man. Hard to put stuff past you.”

“Now don’t be contrary. Can I read it?”

“It’s not finished. Maybe when it’s done.”

“Read me a line.”

“Okay how about the opening line?”

“Super go.”

“It was a dark and stormy night.”

“Wait. You’re kidding right?”

“Okay. I’ll read the real first line. Ahem. ‘Jacob felt he could so no further. His bones ached from the fear and weight of what he had to do. All along his father told him not to go, and now that he ignored him, Jacob could feel the karma slide like a wet snake up his back and feel the heat on his neck. He could smell the stench of the payback that was about to be his.”‘

“Go on. This sounds great.”

“He decided to lay his burden down and face whatever was in store.”

“What burden?”

“It’s a metaphor for his guilt. Shall I continue?”

“Please.”

“The sow had to weigh hundreds of pounds, and the yoke of wagon pressed into his shoulders. He must find a place to rest, or surely he will fall to the ground and not be in a condition to escape. He stopped at a tree and there an old man called his name.”

“How did the old man know his name?”

“You sound like a reviewer. Just wait.

‘Jacob,’ he called.

Jacob stopped gazing at the man with his brow furrowed. ‘You know my name, old man.’

‘I do.’

‘How is that possible?’

‘I know your father. He sent me to find you.’

‘For what purpose?’

‘To see if you have finished your foolish task which you set out to do. “Sew your wild oats.” is how I believe you explained it to your father.”‘

“‘Wild oats.’ What the heck does that mean?”

“Experience what life has to offer. I think I’ve read enough.”

“No, I want to hear more.”

“Okay. Let me read one more line. ‘Your father has instructed me to warn you to return to the homestead so. . .'”

“So?”

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #109 by Keith Channing

February 7, 2017February 6, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 39 Comments

Here is Keith Channing explaining this whole deal. “Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; and either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithkreates@channing.fr before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here – pingbacks don’t often work.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, next Monday.” Here is the photo.

Kreative Kue #109

“Would yo look at that.”

“What?”

“Those bike racers.”

“What about them?”

“They are on some kind of contraption. They’re not racing at all.”

“They are too. It is break time is all.”

“Break time? What is that all about?”

“You see these guys on the motorcycle thingy are giving the cyclists a ride while they have a drink and rest a little.”

“Is that in the rules?”

“Of course. The idea is not to delay the race but make sure the cyclists have enough water and are healthy enough to finish.”

“Takes the uncertainty out of it don’t you think?”

“Well, the best rider will finish not the one who can stand the torture the best.”

“Isn’t the torture part of separating the strong from the weak?”

“I suppose but this way it is a matter of riding skill, not stamina.”

“I don’t know. Would be like putting a football team on Segways for part of the game.”

“Might be fun.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Think of a guy on a Segway going out for a pass and the defender is on his Segway and then they both go after the ball.”

“A big crash right?”

“Yeah. Doesn’t it sound great.”

“You like hockey don’t you?”

“How’d you guess?”

“Oh just lucky.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Hair”

February 4, 2017February 3, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 44 Comments

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It is Steam of Consciousness Saturday time again and this week’s prompt is “Hair.” Linda Hill, the master torturer at the Hill Dungeon of Prompts, says we can use the word any way we want and to have fun. This caused me to pause and wonder how many ways can I use the word “hair?” If you would like to also have these kinds of conundrums visit Linda’s post and read how. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2017/02/03/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-feb-417/

“Gimmie long lengths of hair. Shining, flaxen, waxen hair. Shoulder length or longer.”

“What are you singing?”

“The song from Hair.”

“Hair?”

“Yeah, the musical.”

“Oh. please. That old thing.”

“It’s a classic. Was a major Broadway production with nudity.”

“Nudity? You call weird flashlights nudity?”

“What do you mean?”

“The place was dark except for a few flashlights.”

“So what. The cast was necked.”

“You mean naked.”

“When a bunch of folks are without clothes and there is no swimmin’ hole, and it includes boys as well as girls that’s necked.”

“I see. Did you see the show?”

“Well no.”

“How come?”

“I was only ten when it came out.”

“How do you know about the nude scene then?”

“I read about it.”

“And the song?”

“Partridge Family sang it.”

“But you were little then,”

“I know. I had the record, though.”

“Could you understand what they were saying.”

“No, I just like the music.”

“Ever want to see the show?”

“I would now.”

“Why now?”

“You gotta ask?”

“Man you kill me sometimes. You can see more nudity at the park.”

“What park?”

“Let it go. I was just making a point.”

“Which is?”

“You are an idiot.”

Tuesday Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #108

January 31, 2017January 30, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 56 Comments

“HereYou know I love prompts and will let Keith Channing tell you in his words about this one. “Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; and either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithkreates@channing.fr before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here – pingbacks don’t often work.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, next Monday.”

The photo.

Kreative Kue #108

“Just keep running for god’s sake.”

“I’m not sure I can go any further.”

“You’d better. Want the cops to get you.”

“N-no but my lungs are going to burst.”

“Stop whining. You’re the one who screwed up the getaway car.”

“So I forgot to check the gas.”

“So I forgot to check the gas? You are an idiot you know that?”

“Aw come on. It could happen to anyone.”

“Okay let me ask. Who was responsible for the getaway car?”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah it was me. I’ll never live this down I can see that now.”

“Shut up will you and give me a chance to think. This money is getting pretty heavy, and you’re right it is getting harder to keep running.”

“Look over there. Do you see what I see?”

“Carriages?”

“Yes, carriages. We can grab one of those.”

“I can hear the all points bulletin now. ‘BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR TWO DUMB SHITS IN A STOLEN CARRIAGE ‘ Are you out of your mind?”

“No, listen. We hire one and give him a bunch of dough. He keeps his mouth shut. We look like a couple of tourists, and nobody will be the wiser.”

“I guess it does beat dying of a stroke. Okay, let’s do it.”

“You gentleman look like you are in a hurry.”

“Is this carriage for hire?”

“Well normally it is, but it is booked on an exclusive tour today.”

“Could a little incentive talk you out of skipping the trip.”

“What kind of incentive?”

“A thousand bucks.”

“Whoa. You could talk me out of anything for a thousand bucks. Hop in.”

“Here’s your money. Want to count it?”

“Ten hundred’s is pretty easy to count.”

“So what was the tour was booked?”

“Get up boy. Oh, nothing important.”

Come on. You have my curiosity aroused.”

“Well, the police chief wanted to take his wife for a ride and lunch.”

“The p-police chief?”

“Yeah. You see he’s a nut about romance, carriages, and horses.”

“He is huh.”

“He also likes to drive them himself.”

“H-himself?”

“I would sit back and enjoy the ride, boys. It might be your last for a while.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Wood/Would

January 28, 2017January 27, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 34 Comments

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Just Jot it January

It is Stream of consciousness Saturday time. This weeks prompt is “Wood/Would. Linda Hill says we can use them any way we want. We can use one or both. (Ah freedom.) If you would like to engage in this ~~foolishness~~ art go to Linda’s site and read all about it. Here is the link.

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS and #JusJoJan Jan. 28/17

“I see you have been busy studying that notebook.”

“Yeah, I have been staring at it for it must be an hour.”

“What are you looking at anyway?”

“This is the plan for a boat.”

“Oh, that’s interesting. Why would we want to be looking at a plan for a boat?”

“I was thinking you and I would be able to take this boat and see the world.”

“The world huh? Sounds like it is some boat.”

“Well, it is pretty substantial. You don’t want to caught in the middle of the ocean in some small little thingy.”

“Middle of the ocean? I’m wondering if you have been taking extra medicine when I wasn’t looking.”

“No, of course not. I’m just dreaming of traveling and thought a boat would be a good idea.”

“Okay. It would be fun to have a boat I suppose. Why the plans?”

“I thought I would build it.”

“Build it? Ha ha ha. You who can’t hit a nail without involving your thumb in the process.”

“Laugh if you want, but these plans say you don’t need any special skills.”

“Well, that sounds like you for sure. So you looked puzzled. What’s the problem.”

“I can’t figure out how much it is going to cost.”

“How is that possible? You must have a material list there. All you have to do is add up the materials.”

“There’s labor cost.”

“For you, that’s about ten cents an hour.”

“Fine. Joke if you will. I’m telling you there are some key elements missing.”

“Like what?”

“There is no estimate of the amount of wood.”

“Huh? What is the boat supposed to be made of.”

“Wood.”

“Wood?”

“Wood.”

“Gosh, you would think they would include the amount of wood.”

“You would think they would have wood wouldn’t you?”

“I’m going to make some tea.”

“I would like some.”

“Of course, you would and we are done. Knock wood.”

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #107 by Keith Channing

January 24, 2017January 23, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 39 Comments

I love prompts and will let Keith Channing tell you in his words about this one. “Using this photo(below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; and either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithkreates@channing.fr before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here – pingbacks don’t often work.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, next Monday.”

The Photo.

Kreative Kue #107

“I would love to see you again.”

“I would too. This was fun.”

“I think it ‘d be terrific if we went out to dinner.”

“Oh, that would be great although this coffee shop is nice too.”

“I know it’s just I would like to treat you to something special.”

“Do you have a place in mind?”

“What kind of food do you like.”

“I like most everything.”

“Do you like Thai food.”

“Um. Not my favorite.”

“How about Italian?”

“I’m on a diet.”

“German?”

“Too heavy.”

“Japanese food. How about Japanese?”

“I have a seafood allergy.”

“Er, maybe Chinese?”

“Rice is not an approved item.”

“Gee I’ve run out of ideas.”

“Wait. I have an idea.”

“Thank heavens. I’m about ready to give up.”

“Why don’t you come over to my house and I’ll make you dinner?”

“Aw. That will be too much trouble.”

“Not at all. I will enjoy it. Here are the directions. You can’t miss it.”

“What time should I be there?”

“How about six o’clock and we can have a drink first.”

“Sounds swell. What can I bring.”

“Oh, nothing. I should mention though I live at the top of a pretty long stairway. You might find it uncomfortable.”

“Nonsense. There are no stairs that I can’t handle. See you then.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Glass”

January 21, 2017January 20, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 56 Comments

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It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again and this week’s prompt is “glass.” I have captured the exact words of Mistress Linda Hill

“Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday and Just Jot It January is: “glass.” Use the word “glass,” or find something that’s made of it and use that in your post. Have fun!”

Notice the command to have fun. I think I will take that very seriously. If you would like to join in here is the link to Linda’s post. You can get all the information there.

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS and #JusJoJan Jan. 21/17

“What is this necklace made of?”

“Oh, that piece. It is cut glass.”

“It is certainly lovely.”

“Yes. The artist put many hours into each facet. He wanted to duplicate the cut of diamonds.”

“The look is very much like diamonds.”

“You have great taste. This is one of a kind.”

“How much is it?”

“Let me see. Ah yes here’s the tag. It’s three thousand.”

“My goodness. I would have thought it was a little cheaper.”

“If these were real diamonds this necklace would be over a hundred thousand.”

“Oh, I know. Do you have a diamond necklace like this?”

“Why yes, we do.”

“I would like to see it.”

“Certainly. Wait a minute I need to go in the back and get it.”

“That is no problem. Take your time.”

“I’ll be right back.”

“My that didn’t take long.”

“No, but before I open the box, we require your ID.”

“Oh so that I don’t run away with it?”

“It is just policy. You understand?”

“Of course I do. Here I’ll get my ID out of my purse. I have two names.”

“Two names?”

“Yes, Smith and Wesson.”

“Is that a gun.”

“My goodness, you are very quick. Give me the box, and no one gets hurt.”

“Please don’t. This will come out of my salary.”

“I think you’d better quit today then since it will take a lifetime to pay back a hundred grand. Give me the box.”

“Here you go. Please point that thing somewhere but at me.”

“Now you behave, and I’m going to leave and as you can see no one gets hurt.”

“I won’t be able to get married now.”

“What?”

“My fiancée and I were counting on my job to make ends meet. He’s in Med school.”

“Oh please. This affects me how?”

“Just thought you should know you are ruining two lives.”

“Stop crying. I had a fiancée once.”

“What happened?”

“Never mind. Here take the damn necklace.”

“Really? Oh, you are the best.”

“I just hope he’s worth it.”

“He is. Take the glass one. At least you’ll have a beautiful necklace.”

“You mean it?”

“Yeah, I can cover the three thousand over time.”

“That’s okay. You take care. Give that man a kiss from me. Have a great wedding.”

“I love your bag by the way.”

“Thanks. Got it at Neiman’s. Bye now.”

Tuesday Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #106

January 17, 2017January 16, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 51 Comments

Kreative Kue with Keith Channing is back. Here is Keith’s explanation of what is going on. “Using this photo (Below)as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; and either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithkreates@channing.fr before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here – pingbacks don’t often work.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, next Monday.”

Here is the photo.

Kreative Kue #106