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Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – Pad

~ John W. Howell ~ 73 Comments

A picture of a string with drops of water- the logo for SoCS

The machine waits patiently for me to pad over and touch the screen with my choice. Today feels like a Latte Macchiato. A touch of the button and here it comes. One sip and my caffeine-deprived brain reaches out to grab and chug the rest. Before that could happen, the doorbell expresses its familiar Westminster chime. The baying hounds are pacified with a knucklebone thrown into the soundproof room. The slammed door brings back the former peace of the morning. Checking the security feed, there is no one in sight. “Who’s there?” is the demand through the speaker. “Delivery for Howell,” the reply. “Just leave it.” Seconds pass. “Need signature.” More seconds pass. “Show yourself.”

The figure steps into camera range, and although fuzzy, the image is remarkably similar to Wile E. Coyote. With a sigh, the security shut down begins., The SWAT team needs to be put on standby. A quick text to the leader confirms that status. Also, the flight of A-10 Warthogs must be diverted. Another call to the commander puts that worry to rest. The SEAL team needs to be called off, and a call to the leader makes that possible. A call to the tow truck driver stops the deployment of an M1A1 Abrams Tank. The control panel simplifies the shutdown process of the security system. The boiling oil vats are put on standby, the turret mortars disengaged, the Trebuchet on safety, the concertina wire rolled, the Claymore mines reset, the tower Gatling guns on safety, the moat net dropped, the alligators fed, and the IEDs and shoulder-held rockets put away.  The Proton torpedoes switched off. The gamma ray beams covered. The high powered maser guns switched to stand by and the nanorobots chained in the basement. The locks on the door are thrown. And the door opened.

No words are spoken, and the Coyote hands me a clipboard. I sign, and he gives me an envelope. His paw is outstretched in the classic tip request fashion. “Fall seven times. Stand up eight” is my tip of the day. The coyote seems displeased as I shut the door. My thought, given his challenges, the tip is a good one. The envelope has one note. It reads: Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “pad.” Use it as a noun, use it as a verb, use it any way you’d like. Have fun!

If you would like to see what others have done with the prompt, visit Linda’s post. Here is the link: https://lindaghill.com/2025/08/22/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-aug-23-2025/

Pad by John W. Howell © 2025

“So, no clock, huh?”

“Nope, not much going on on the dates in question.”

“So we have the security cartoon backup.”

“You trying to tell me something?”

“Was hoping for a historical jaunt.”

“Maybe next week.”

“Fair enough.”

“I thought you would be dropping VooDoo Ranger hints.”

“No need.”

“Why?”

“You just did.”

“Uber?”

“Right over there.”

Photo by Dan Antion

“Now we are talking.”

“Yup. Nice seat in the back of the coupe for the older folks.”

“Older folks?”

“I’m just sayin'”

“I suppose we’d better get going.”

“Just one thing.”

“Yes, of course.”

“We have to stop at the drag strip on the way.”

“To race?”

“No. Just to deliver some packages. The guy is a DoorDash driver.”

“Just the drag strip, right?”

“Maybe one or two others.”

“Sure. What is that smell?”

“One of the deliveries is corned beef.”

“Good grief.”

“You’ll get used to it.”

“Or have an olfactory meltdown.”

“Yeah, that too. Let’s go.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – Chip

~ John W. Howell ~ 84 Comments

 

A picture of a string with drops of water- the logo for SoCS

Approaching the coffee machine with trepidation is necessary, given past troubles. The touchscreen appears normal, and the system status lights are all green. Today may be a day of peace after all. A touch of the two coffee buttons brings the normal function of my dear friend to life.  Sure enough, a cup is delivered. The first sip lets my bleeding brain know salvation is at hand. The neurons finally stop their light show, and calm spreads throughout the gray land. The second sip is followed by the jarring intrusion of the Westminster chimes, indicating that once again, some idiot has ignored the “Do not ring the doorbell” sign.

A Bennie bone tossed into the soundproof room and slamming of the door puts an end to the eardrum pain caused by the painful octave reach of the Frenchie bark version of “Danger Will Robinson.”  Looking at the security system monitor screen, I see what appears to be a pig dressed in human clothing. “What do you want?”

“D-d-d-d-delivery f-f-for J-J-John.” “Can you leave it?” Of course, as the words left my mouth, the answer was well known. Of course not. Heaving a sigh, the security system shutdown process has begun. The SWAT team needs to be put on standby. A quick text to the leader confirms that status. Also, the flight of A-10 Warthogs must be diverted. Another call to the commander puts that worry to rest. The SEAL team needs to be called off, and a call to the leader makes that possible. The control panel simplifies the shutdown process of the security system. The boiling oil vats are put on standby, the turret mortars disengaged, the Trebuchet on safety, the concertina wire rolled, the Claymore mines reset, the tower Gatling guns on safety, the moat net dropped, the alligators fed, the IEDs and shoulder-held rockets put away.  The Proton torpedoes switched off. The locks on the door are thrown. And the door opened.

“S-s-sign h-h-here.” We swap, and when turning to go back inside, the pig says, “What, no tip?” “Use a seven iron to chip up to the green,” is the reply. The pig bears his teeth, and the door is slammed before things get nasty. The delivery is from Linda Hill. The message reads, Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “chip.” Use it as a noun, use it as a verb, use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!

To see what others have done with the prompt, go to Linda’s post. Here is the link https://lindaghill.com/2025/07/18/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-19-2025/

Chip by John W. Howell © 2025

“You should have tipped the pig.”

“Why?”

“Just a nice thing to do.”

“I think it is his job to deliver, right?”

“Yeah, but clearly he needs the money.”

“What for? More corn?”

“It wouldn’t hurt for you to chip in a few bucks.”

“This is coming from the VooDoo Ranger big spender.”

“Hold on. This is your blog. You invented this whole scenario. Why should I have to pay?”

“It would be nice to share.”

“Do I get paid for showing up here?”

“Well, no.”

“I rest my case.”

“Fine. Order the Uber and let’s get to the pub.”

“Silly man, like 1000 times before, he’s right over there.”

Photo by Dan Antion

“You are kidding, right?”

“We got a great deal.”

“I’m sure, and all we have to do is deliver those plants.”

“Well, yeah. But they are on the way.”

“I guess it’s better than having to plant them.”

“Erm.”

“What?”

“We have to hang them.”

“Oh, for heaven’s sake.”

“It’s easy work. Well, except for the ladder.”

“Ladder, what ladder?”

“The ten-footer that we need to reach the hanging places.”

“Why so high?”

“It’s on the rooftop of that new fifty-story high-rise.”

“Of course it is.”

“You’re not afraid of heights, right?”

“Let’s just go and decide who is going up that ladder later.”

“Good plan. We can flip for it.”

“Yeah, and whoever wins the ladder climb doesn’t have to pay for the VooDoos.”

“I’ll do the ladder.”

“Thought so.”

 

Views of the Neighborhood – Lakeway Farmer’s Market

~ John W. Howell ~ 95 Comments
Today, we are going to check out the Lakeway Farmers Market, which is a once-a-week happening during the summer. We are catered by Acre 41 of Austin. Our entertainment is Annie Ross
Menu
Eggs Your Way – bacon or sausage, breakfast potatoes, toast
Spinach & Mushroom Egg White Omelet – havarti, breakfast potatoes, toast
Smoked Ham & Pinmento Cheese Omelet – house pimento cheese, breakfast potatoes, toast
Tres Leches French Toast – strawberries, powdered sugar, whipped cream
Wagyu Flat Iron & Eggs – eggs your way, breakfast potatoes
Huevos Rancheros – sunny egg, crispy tortilla, black bean, avocado, jalapeno, queso fresco
Sausage & Egg Burrito – chicken sausage, queso chihuahua, pepperjack, salsa roja
Thick Bacon Benedict t – hollandaise, english muffin, asparagus, poached eggs
Salmon Poke Bowl l – maitake, edamame, cucumber, avocado, ponzu, sushi rice
14 oz Prime Rib – natural beef jus, horseradish cream, fries
We are taking the minibus today. Don’t worry, there is plenty of room. Let’s go.
This shot gives you an idea of the layout.
Jewelry and other stuff.
These guys sell meat.
Amy’s art glass.
Music to spend money by.
Yum.  Fresh bagels.
Authentic Mexican baked goods. (No, she is not selling Dios)
Authentic Mexican salsas.
A 3D printed collectables stand.
Asian Dumplings of all kinds.
Homemade pet treats.
Puzzle candles.
Forever jewelry. A concept I’m still struggling to understand.
Eggs, raw milk, and candy.
A 1937 Pontiac Special Delux.
Hand-dipped incense.
Fresh bread.
And finally, some healthy vegetables and melons.
Time now to relax with the food and music. I hope you have a terrific week.

Views of the Neighborhood – Wildlife of the Hill Country – Walk Part II

~ John W. Howell ~ 83 Comments

Yes, we are back  to finish the wildlife of the hill country walk. These are animals that live all around us in Texas. If you missed part I here is a link. We are catered today by La Condsa in Austin. Our entertainment is

Menu

TOSTADA DE CALABAZA – requesón, pepita pesto, summer squash

ENMOLADAS – chicken thigh, tomatillo, pipian verde (gf)

SOPES DE BARBACOA – beef cheek, avocado, escabeche

CARNITAS TACOS – avocado, salsa cruda, joe’s microgreens (gf)

HUARACHE DE HUITLACOCHE – black beans, dos lunas clásico, mushrooms, epazote (v)

QUESADILLA DE SHORT RIB – dos lunas clásico, black bean mole, salsa verde, pickled onion (gf )

CARNE ASADA – black bean mole, squash, salsa jitomate (gf)

A LA BRASA – grilled chicken, carrot purée, chermoula, lemon (gf)

HONGOS – grilled mushrooms, chimichurri, mole amarillo, guajillo (vg/gf)

VERACRUZANA – grilled rockfish, olives, capers, charred tomato (gf)

COCHINITA PIBIL – braised pork, achiote, black beans, habanero (gf)

Picture of an old time school bus

Let’s go

A word about the photos. The displays are under glass so reflections are hard to manage. It had just stopped raining so just a little more challenge. I hope youi enjoy the display in spite of the problems.

Nine-banded Armadillo

Black capped Vireo.

Leaf cutter Ants

Bobcat

Pollinators

Texas Toad

Feral Hog

Decomposers and Scavengers

Rio Grande Cichlid

Turkey Vulture

Monarch Butterfly

Red-tailed Hawk

Coyote

Painted Bunting

 

I am Guesting with Sally Cronin Today

~ John W. Howell

This header should look familiar. It belongs to Sally G Cronin, who has a very successful blog built on helping other Indie authors be more successful. Sally is an Indie author herself, and she has 18 books published.

Today, she features my first book, My GRL. I am so grateful for her support and hope you take a moment to visit her. Here is the link. https://smorgasbordinvitation.wordpress.com/2025/05/07/smorgasbord-book-promotions-my-first-book-thriller-mystery-my-grl-by-john-w-howell/ 

Sally is currently featuring the Author’s first or latest book. MY GRL is included in Sally’s program.

 

A little about Sally

Sally Cronin is the author of eighteen books, including her memoir Size Matters: Especially when you weigh 330lb, first published in 2001, which followed her weight loss of 150 lbs and the program she designed to achieve a healthy weight and regain her health. A program she shared with her clients over her 26-year career as a nutritional therapist and on her blog. This has been followed by another seventeen fiction and non-fiction books, including multi-genre collections of short stories and poetry.

Her latest book, Size Always Matters, is an extended and updated version of her original book. It now includes the nutritional element of losing weight and some recipes with ingredients that provide the nutrients necessary for healthy weight loss and continued good health.

As an author, Sally understands how important it is to have support in marketing books. She offers several FREE promotional opportunities in the Café and Bookstore on her blog and across her social media. Sally does more for Indie Authors, and visiting her blog will show you the extent of her support.

After leading a nomadic existence and exploring the world, she now lives with her husband on the coast of Southern Ireland, enjoying the seasonal fluctuations in the temperature and the rain.

Visit Sally’s Amazon page for more information on her books.

I have turned off comments and would appreciate them on Sally’s post.

Top Ten Things Not to Do When Grocery Shopping

~ John W. Howell ~ 84 Comments

 

This post was initially co-authored by Marie Bailey and me in 2014. Since we all still grocery shop, it might still be helpful.

10  When grocery shopping, do not go to the store on an empty stomach.  If you do, at best, you will quiet your grumbling stomach with a candy bar or two while waiting in the check-out line.  At worst, you will wind up devouring the entire rotisserie chicken that was to be your family’s dinner, guzzling a 64-oz bottle of Coke, and tearing into your kid’s favorite cereal, all before you reach the checkout.

9  When grocery shopping, do not assume that the shortest check-out line is indeed the quickest check-out line.  If you do, at best, the person ahead of you with five items will want to use a personal check to pay, and you’ll only have to wait an additional ten minutes while the cashier and store manager figure out a way to finally approve the check.  At worst, the person ahead of you with only nine items will question the cashier on each and every item (naturally, all the items were supposed to be on sale, including the ten-gallon water jug, which looks like it came from the employee break area).

8  When grocery shopping, do not assume that all the sale items, especially the 2-for-1 deals, have been entered into the registers.  If you do, at best, the cashier will take a few minutes to correct the error.  At worst, you’ll be like the guy in #9, having to argue about each item  on sale and drawing the ire and ill-will of every other shopper behind you.

7  When grocery shopping, do not assume that your regular grocery store will always and forever maintain the floor layout to which you’ve grown accustomed.  If you do, at best, your store might make only subtle changes like moving the eggs from beside the butter to beside the yogurt, but on the same aisle.  At worst, one day, you will walk in and become quickly convinced that you’re in the wrong store.  You will spend hours trying to find the raisins, which used to be on Aisle 3 among other dried fruits but are now on Aisle 36 next to the juice with the logic that fruit is fruit.

6  When grocery shopping, do not forget to wear noise-reducing earplugs.  If you forget your earplugs, at best, you will simply slow your pace and linger longer than planned due to the hypnotic effect of the “music.”  At worst, the subliminal messages of “buy more, buy more, buy more” will enter your brain, and you will wind up buying twice as much food as you originally intended, leaving your wallet half as full.

5  When grocery shopping, do not think that by leaving your credit cards and checkbook at home, you can avoid spending over your budget.  If you do, at best, the subliminal messages from #6 will cause you some mild embarrassment as you decide to forfeit the bottle of Merlot, Death-by-Chocolate cake, and fancy new plastic wine glasses (all items NOT on your shopping list) because you don’t have enough cash.  At worst, either to avoid embarrassment or because you are still prey to the messages of “buy more,” you will leave your items at the register, dash to the ATM, withdraw as much as you can, and then promptly ask for a case of the Merlot (which you may need later when you realize how much you have spent).

4  When grocery shopping, do not think the fresh fruit being offered as a 2-for-1 special is necessarily a great deal. If you do, at best, the fruit will be fine and edible until the following day, when you realize you will have to eat all of it since it is quickly going bad.  At worst, after you come home and put all the food away, you decide to have some strawberries and cream only to discover that the 2-for-1 fresh fruit has one layer of fresh fruit atop moldy, squishy fruit, which moves on its own.

3  When grocery shopping, do not think that the baggers are always well-trained.  If you do, at best, you will have a bagger who knows enough to put the eggs on top of other items in a bag.  At worst, you will get a bagger who either wasn’t trained or doesn’t care and find at home that a large bottle of laundry detergent was packed on top of your package of sushi rolls, which now resemble sushi pancakes.

2  When grocery shopping, do not think that slowly walking down the middle of an aisle with your head down while talking on your cell phone will not annoy anyone.  If you do, at best, shoppers trying to get around you may just gently prod your shopping cart and alert you to the need to get out of the way.  At worst, you may find yourself pinned between your shopping cart and the cart of the person or persons who finally lost their temper and are now sending you, shopping cart and all, into the egg section.

1  When grocery shopping, do not think being polite to shoppers on cell phones who are oblivious to their surroundings will help you keep your temper.  If you do, at best, you will quickly realize that navigating around these people is futile.  At worst, you will lose your temper, causing you to crash into the offending shopper with your cart, and the momentum will send you both into the egg section.  As with automobile rear-end accidents, you will be the assumed guilty party and the store will charge you for the broken eggs as well as force you to clean up on aisle 6.

Resa McConaghy – Costume Designer – Honors Detour on the Eternal Road

~ John W. Howell

Resa McConaghy had a decades-long career designing costumes in over 50 movies for stars like Kim Cattrall and Helen Mirren. When the film industry ground to a halt during Covid, she started upcycling old fabric into elaborate couture. Today, she honored me by designing Cloud Wear for Sam Tourneau, a protagonist in Detour on the Eternal Road.

I am very grateful for Resa’s talent; she felt she could serve Sam by giving her a lovely wardrobe to wear in the afterlife. Here is the link to La post. While there, take time to look around at the beautiful photos and gowns Resa has created.

More about Resa in her words.

Resa McConaghy

Resa McConaghy

“My name is Resa McConaghy. I’m a semi-retired Costume Designer for film and television.

Strawberry Kisses

My first Art Gown “Strawberry Kisses” was to create some beauty in my life after mom died. It was a hit with people, so I continued to make and post more “Art Gowns”.

At some point, I began upcycling, repurposing, and, in general, making the gowns out of any fabric or notions that were not new goods. I was using up anything headed for landfills. All the gowns are hand-sown so that machines do not use energy.

The Art Gowns are available to borrow or rent (situation dependant) for Gala’s, photo shoots and film production.

A few more beautiful gowns from Resa’s collection.

Velvet Tango

Jade

Cecilia Lionheart

MADEMOISELLE EMILY

I have turned off comments so you can leave them with Resa.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – Blanket

~ John W. Howell ~ 68 Comments

A picture of a string with drops of water- the logo for SoCS

The long wait is over. The Columbian soothin’ syrup fills the mug, and the aroma of those poor masticated beans covers the air like a blanket. Should we feel sorry for the beans? They were ripped off their bush home and forced into bags, held deep in the hold of a ship, only to emerge in a strange country. They were then run through the most brutal grinder, doused with boing water, and disposed of with the moniker “dregs.” The first sip of my coffee tells me to be thankful, not sorry.

The clock is set for Saturday, November 15. The location is St. Louis, and the time is one hour. The plunger is pulled, and we find ourselves in the courthouse.

We hear the jury read guilty verdicts for nine members of the St. Louis-based “Egan’s Rats” gang of bank robbers who were convicted of robbery of a mail truck and each sentenced to 25 years incarceration in a federal prison. Over five years between 1919 and 1924, Egan’s Rats, founded by Willie Egan and later led by Dint Colbeck, stole almost $4.5 million worth of cash and property, including the heist of $2.4 million from an armored mail truck on April 2, 1923. The convictions ended the organization, which had employed over 300 people over 35 years.

As the judge leaves the bench, our alarm goes off, and we flop back on the couch. A text comes in from Linda Hill. It reads: Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “blanket.” Use it any way you’d like. Have fun!

To see what others have done with the prompt, visit Lnda’s post. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2024/11/15/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-nov-16-2024/

Blanket by John W. Howell © 2024

“That was an obscure blanket of history.”

“Yes, it was. Very interesting, though.”

“I guess running a criminal enterprise for 35 years has to be a record.”

“Oh, I don’t know. The US Congress has been at it for 248 years.”

“Well, catching them must have been some fine sleuthing.”

“I would say so. Speaking of sleuthing.”

“Uber is over there.”

Photo by Dan Antion

“A custom pick-up.”

“Yeah, she’s a beaut.”

“Looks like we can all fit.”

“That is a bonus for sure.”

“Shotgun.”

“Of course. I’m paying, and you call shotgun.”

“Okay, I’ll take the middle.”

“Good decision.”

Top Ten Things Not to Do in the Rain

~ John W. Howell ~ 80 Comments

Photo by Alex Dukhanov on Unsplash

This post ran on December 15, 2014. It may come in handy since it still rains, and we have time before the big freezes.

* * *

Top Ten Things Not to Do in the Rain

10 If you are in the rain driving your car, do not engage cruise control. If you do, at best,  you may have a spin-out. At worst, your car will continue at a constant rate of speed as you slide off the highway into the old river gorge swollen with rain water and moving at fifty miles an hour.

9 If you are in the rain driving your car, do not cross a puddle of unknown depth, especially if you see the back fin of an unidentified fish. If you do, at best, rescue will come before the car sinks. At worst, you and your car will be the subject of the six o’clock news as the Coast Guard boards your temporary boat and claps you in irons

8 If you are in the rain and don’t have an umbrella, do not hold a paper over your head. If you do, at best, you will end up wet and ink-covered. At worst, you might be mistaken for a person with a paper mache head and have to deal with parents of children who are sure you are from a different planet.

7 If you are in the rain, do not try to run to minimize the effects of the raindrops. If you do, at best, you will simply get wetter faster due to your increased velocity. At worst, running in a downpour has all the makings of a two-reel comedy, especially if you slip and fall into a puddle as you step off the curb. (You know a cellphone camera will catch that underwear flash and all)

6 If you are in the rain and standing with people to get on the bus, do not mention the rain. If you do, at best, those around you will think you are an idiot for discussing the obvious. At worst, you may just be lucky enough to get under an umbrella and then be told to move since you  have made your umbrella mate uncomfortable with your observation of “wow, some rain, huh.”

5 If you are in the rain and carrying anything, do not think you can keep it dry by shoving it under your clothes. If you do, at best, you will have a cold, wet lump next to your skin. At worst, those around you will think you have taken something illegally and turn you in to the police, who decide not to step out of their car in the rain but rather Taser you from inside the vehicle.

4 If you are in the rain, do not try to eat your sandwich on the go. If you do, at best, you will have to eat it too fast to save it from melting. At worst, you will be too slow, and the best part of the sandwich will run down the sleeve of the arm connected to the hand wrapped around the sandwich. This part of the sandwich will only be discovered when you raise your arm to ask a question of the visiting executive from the home office, who will naturally think you rolled in something terrible.

3 If you are in the rain, do not think your dog will perform as they usually do on a walk. If you do, at best, you and the dog will be in for a frustrating experience. At worst, your dog will associate rain with your disappointment and may want to help by leaving a surprise at the door before walking if it is raining outside to show you there is no need for the walk.

2 If you are in the rain and you have a flat tire, do not try to change it yourself. If you do, at best, you will be soaking wet and dirty. At worst, you might just be part of a freak accident where the car slips off the jack and rolls down an embankment, only to become airborne until it lands on a person’s roof below and stops in their living room. (While they are watching the six o’clock news about an earthquake in Asia) Okay, I’ll admit it’s not realistic, but it could happen. Why take the chance?

1 If you are in the rain, do not remove your shoes to prevent your Italian leathers from getting wet. If you do, at best, you will only step on some stranger’s gum. At worst, you may step into a puddle that, if you had your shoes on, you would have tried to avoid, only to discover someone let their pet piranhas loose for a run down the street without their leashes. The sad part is the piranhas were let loose before their tapir dinner.