“Twiggy. I’m exhausted.”

“What’s the matter?”

“Mom took me to Lowe’s, and I’m worn out.”

“Oh, poor you. You’ve got to go to Lowe’s.”

“I know. All those people adoring me and the treats.”

“Yes, the horror.”

“I’m starting to recover.”

“Oh, I would take the rest of the day. One can’t be too careful.”

“You might be right. I should take it easy.”

“Don’t want you pulling something or getting sick.”

“A good shake and I’m as good as new.”

“I think Dad caught you on that shake. Pretty funny.”

“Dad, did you take a photo of me shaking?”

“He’s not going to answer you and break the fourth wall.”

“Maybe mom can tell me.”

“Sorry, kiddo. You are on your own.”

“Where are you going?”

“I’m just going to do my yoga.”

“Now that you mention it. I should do mine, too.”

“I wouldn’t rush into anything. Remember what a trying day you’ve had.”

“I think you are right. Maybe I’ll find a cool spot.”

“There you go. Catch your breath.”

“This tile fits the bill. Thanks for the suggestion.”

“Anytime, little one. We don’t want you to overdo it for sure.”

“Are you being facetious?”

“Who me? Not at all. I just want to make sure your highness is comfortable.”

 

“I can smell you, Tempeste.”

“That’s not a nice thing to say.”

“Well, when someone is trying to sneak up on someone else, you have to go downwind.”

“What does downwind mean?”

“Your scent carries with the wind, so you have to move to where the wind is blowing at your face, not your rear.”

“How do I do that with a ceiling fan blowing the wind in all directions?”

“That is a tricky part. Maybe it’s best to stalk someone outside.”

“Well, we are inside now. Got any tips?”

“Put your nose down. What do you smell?”

“Just a couch. I can’t get your scent.”

“Yeah, that’s cause I am on the side of the fan moving air towards me.”

“Oh, I get it. I’m on the side of the fan that carries my scent to you.”

“I think you have it. If you want to sneak up on me, you have to go around the back of me.”

“Now that is a hard thing to do for sure.”

”

“Give it a try.”

“Okay, so I’m going to move off to your left.”

“Very good. You are almost out of the fan’s influence.”

“What do you mean, almost?”

“You would have a better chance if you went through Dad’s office and came up behind me.”

“That is a long way to go.”

“Wouldn’t it be worth it to catch me by surprise?”

“Now that I’m here, I would say it would be. To jump you unannounced is the best.”

“Best for you, I would say. Not so much fun for me.”

“Makes me wonder why you teach me the skill to do it, then.”

“Sisterly love.”

 

“Twiggy, this sun feels good.”

“Yes, it does. Why not take a load off and enjoy it?”

“Oh yeah. This feels good.”

“I thought so too.”

“Have you ever thought about the meaning of life?”

“Um, besides kibble, chew toys, naps, walks, and treats?”

“Yeah. You know, do we have a higher purpose for being here?”

” This is a serious subject. What brought this up?”

“I was watching a TV show about the universe, and it got me thinking.”

“Be careful when you do that.”

“It’s just that the universe is so big and we are so small.”

“When you think about it, our universe is perfect.”

“How do you mean?”

“Look around. There are fences to keep us protected and a nice house to keep us warm.”

“Yeah, but don’t you want to go beyond these walls and experience what is out there?”

“You mean run for my life from cars and coyotes?”

“Oh man, you just made a good point. Okay, I’m off the universe stuff.”

“Yeah, let’s contemplate our next meal or maybe the next toy we are going to play with.”

“Sold.”

 

 

“What are these, Twiggy?”

“They look like giant macaroons to me.”

“There is no squeaker.”

“Not every toy has a squeaker, Tempeste.”

“Yeah, but then what’s the incentive to tear it apart?”

“That’s just it. You are not supposed to tear it apart.”

“Does yours have a squeaker?”

“I haven’t played with it long enough to know.”

“I’ll check it out.”

“Sure, and then get it all wet with your drool.”

“What’s wrong with my drool?”

“You gotta be kidding me.”

Alright then, I’ll just play with mine. What are you doing up there?”

“I just asked Mon to close the gate and toss mine in here.”

“Why did you do that?”

“So that I can play with my toy in peace.”

“Since when do I bother you while you are playing with your toy?”

“The last time was two minutes ago.”

“You mean when I was going to check for a squeaker?”

“Yup. Squeaker check now, sopping wet toy later.

“That’s not fair.”

“As is life cricket.”

Twiggy celebrated her Eighth birthday on Tuesday. Here she is with her present. Looks like she might have been expecting a treat instead but it was a good day.

Let’s join Twiggy and Tempeste outside.

“So twiggy. How’s that sun?”

“It’s delightful.”

“I have trouble just lying around like that.”

“Yeah, but you and I are different.”

“Well, that’s for sure.”

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to look for a toy so we can play.”

“What makes you think I want to play?”

“Well, it is a beautiful day and thought we could play.”

“I agree it is a beautiful day. I want to lie in the sun.”

“While you are lying there, what am I going to do?”

“You know, sometimes you just have to be alone and entertain yourself.”

“Entertain myself? What fun is that?”

“It may not sound like fun now, but think of something you would enjoy.”

“I do enjoy chasing a ball by myself. Maybe I’ll do that.”

“There you go. Find a ball and chase it.”

“I haven’t seen one for a while.”

“Go check out the entire yard.”

”

“Good idea. I’ll check every corner.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

“I’ll try the far side.”

“Great.”

“Are you watching me, Twiggy?”

“Uh Huh. Got my eyes on you.”

“Looks like you’re sleeping to me.”

“How could I possibly sleep?”

“Twiggy. Wake up. That thing is here again.”

“Uh. Please let me nap. That thing is always somewhere.”

“But not right here in our sanctuary.”

“Yeah, only once a week.”

“I don’t trust it. It makes a weird noise.”

“It is picking up dirt and hair.”

“Look, it wants me to move. I think it should move.”

“Don’t be a baby. Just get out of the way.”

“Okay, but only cause you say so.”

“Oh, brother. Next, you’ll want to give it a panther treatment.”

“Good idea. The panther gets into its striking position.”

“I hope that thing doesn’t have an electrified defense system.”

“Wait. You think it might?”

“You never know. If I were an AI machine, you better believe I would have a zapper like nobody’s business.”

“There’s Dad. I’m going to ask him.”

“That’s a good idea.”

“Dad. Does that bot have a shocking defense system?”

“I can’t imagine where you got that idea, but her initials are Twiggy. No defense systems at all.”

“Then it’s okay for me to give it a panther lesson?’

” I wouldn’t do that. Although it has no systems of its own, it is under the protective cover of Mom.”

“Say no more. That’s even more powerful than a shock.”

“Smart dog.”

 

“So, Tempest, you’ve been playing around that tree, right?”

“How’d you know?”

“I heard the fence move, and that can only mean one thing.”

“Well, I may have tried to get to an ornament or two.”

“You know that is the quickest way to drive Mom up the wall.”

“How much could it hurt? There are plenty of ornaments.”

“That’s not the point. She doesn’t want you swallowing anything harmful.”

“I don’t think a couple of needles would be harmful.”

“Says the dope who continues to eat leaves. Say, what’s that on your face?”

“Face? Nothing.”

“Oh man. You have got to be kidding me. You got an ornament. Where is it?”

“Okay, you caught me. It’s over under the tree.”

“Come here and wipe your mouth like this.”

“Why? I didn’t eat anything.”

“Trust me, you need to wipe your face. You need to spend some quality time doing that.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about. I didn’t eat anything.”

“That’s not going to help you when Mom sees your face.”

“Oh, hi, Mom.”

“I can’t bear to watch.”

“Tempest, do you know anything about this ornament on the floor?”

“What ornament?”

“Twiggy. Look at all these delicious leaves.”

“Oh no. Tempeste, you leave them alone.”

“I’ll leave them alone. Alone with me in my mouth.”

“You are going to get in so much trouble.”

“Who’s going to know? Unless you tell.”

“I’m not going to tell, but you know those aren’t good for you.”

“Not good for me? Well, I think otherwise.”

“Come up on this porch now.”

“You sounded just like Mom.”

“That was Mom,”

“Oh man, just look out there. And more keep falling.”

“And you will make yourself sick if you keep eating them.”

“Look at this one.”

“Leave it.”

“It’s such a little one. Couldn’t possibly hurt.”

“You are going to develop a leaf dependency if you’re not careful.”

“What a way to go.”

“Oh, brother. You’re hopeless.”

“Okay, I’ll leave them alone.”

“If only.”

“Hey, Twiggy. Check out my Down Dog yogi move.”

“I can’t see you from here.”

“Darn it. You missed my Down Dog.”

“Well, just do it again over here.”

“What do you have there?”

A snowman from last year.”

“I don’t remember that toy.”

“Well, it was here last year. Maybe you just forgot.”

“Just forgot? Are you kidding? I have the memory of an elephant.”

“Well, it looks like you are one peanut shy of a full memory load.”

“This is serious. You don’t think I have dementia, do you?”

“Of course not. You are too young. You just forgot the toy, is all.”

“I never forget a toy. That has a face no one could forget.”

“Well then, maybe you never played with it.”

“I guess that could be. I try to grab every toy, so this has me confused.”

“I can sure vouch for you grabbing toys.”

“I know, right? This might be serious.”

“Forget it already. Just accept that you overlooked one.”

“I don’t know if I can. Forgetting a toy is one thing, but not grabbing it is quite another.”

“I’ll be through in a minute, then you can grab this one.”

“You are  such a good sister.”

“Or someone who wants this memory vs grab conversation to be over.”