Top Ten Things Not to Do During A Lunar Rover Mission in 1971

July 27, 2020July 26, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 75 Comments

This week marks the 49th anniversary of Appollo 15 Astronauts using a vehicle to drive on the moon. Of course, we all want to go with them, and through the magic of our imagination, we can. We do have to follow a few rules, and so this list has been developed to keep you from causing a tear in the time continuum. Hop aboard the imagination time thingy, and off we go.

Top Ten Things Not to Do During a Lunar Rover Mission in 1971.

10 If you go, do not ask Dave Scott, the mission commander, if you can take Jim Irwin’s place on the ride. If you do, at best, Dave may not hear you through the sunspot static. At worse, Dave will let you drive. (That was smart, Michael. You have no idea how to work this thing, and you are now headed for that vast crater. Of course, this buggy can be replaced for $10,000,000. You can pay for it out of your book royalties. Hahaha)

9 If you go, do not ignore Tiny the WWF champ when he gives you a direction from mission control. If you do, at best, Tiny will provide you with one more chance. At worst, you think you are safe from Tiny up here on the moon. (Feel that heat, Mark. That is the pre-ignition warm-up of the rocket in your pants. You see, Tiny can put you in orbit. It looks like the countdown has begun.)

8 If you go, do not complain about the 8 MPH speed of the lunar rover. If you do, at best, you won’t get another ride. At worst, the commander will take you out to the furthest point and leave you there. (You now need to know what “walk back limit” means, Mica. It is the furthest point you can go and yet walk back to the lunar lander before your oxygen runs out. I hope you can hold your breath cause you were dropped off outside the walk back limit.)

7 If you go, do not mess with the equipment. If you do, at best you won’t mess up anything. At worst, you will tinker with the Sun shadow device. (That was the one thing not to touch, Moses. It is the navigational device that keeps the lunar rover in contact with the lander using the sun. The purpose is so the rover doesn’t get lost. Good thing there is still a gyro device, or you might get a tour of the dark side of the moon.)

6 If you go, do not plug your phone into the battery system to play tunes. If you do, at best, someone will tell you to knock it off. At worst, playing your music will wear down the batteries. (The only power cells carried on the mission are 36 volt, silver-zinc potassium hydroxide non-rechargeable batteries. They are suitable for a 57-mile range. Sure hope you are not out that far, Marcus.)

5 If you go, do not ask if we are there yet. If you do, at best, Dave Scott will ignore you. At worst, he will finally give up and tell you to walk back to the lander. (Since the maximum distance traveled on the lunar rover during the Apollo mission was 17.25 miles, Miguel it is no wonder Dave wants you out of the vehicle.)

4 If you go, do not ask how far to the next rest area. If you do, at best, Dave Scott will be talking to Mission Control. At worst, he will give you additional instructions on the capabilities of your suit. (You need to relax, Mitchell. There are no rest areas on the moon. Gives new meaning to the term, “hold it.”)

3 If you go, do not tell Dave Scott someone stole the steering wheel. If you do, at best, Dave will think you are joking. At worst, he’ll realize you know nothing about the lunar rover. (The rover is controlled by a T-stick controller, Milo. Push forward and you go ahead. Right or left to go right or left. Pull back, and the brakes are engaged. Press that little button while pulling back, and the rover goes into reverse. Dave is now asking you to get out of the control seat. You blame him?)

2 If you go, do not let Dave Scott know you have AAA in case of a breakdown. If you do, at best, he’ll think you are nuts. At worst, he will call Mission Contro and ask permission to lock you in the lander. (The whole idea of AAA on the moon is laughable, Miles. The fact that you said that out loud gives Dave grave concerns about the mission safety.)

1 If you go, do not offer to play your road trip CD. If you do, at best, you will get a polite decline. At worst, you’ll now have to explain what a CD is. (The CD was first sold in 1982, Marshall. The crew has never heard of it. It is not going to help to turn up the volume on Willie Nelson’s “On the Road Again.” You have these guys concerned.)

Views of the Neighborhood – The Outing

July 26, 2020July 25, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 110 Comments

The time finally came for me to go on an outing that was not doctor related. I know this may not sound like a big deal, but I was very happy to leave the neighborhood just for a little while. I hope you don’t mind that I’m dragging you along.

Views of the Neighborhood

Our first stop is..wait for it…Shred Day. Yes, we are taking all our confidential stuff that needs shredding.

views of the neighborhood

Here is a shot of the lane over from us. It gives you a good idea on the process. You pull up. The Boy Scouts take your stuff and put it in the gray tote.

So we are waved into this lane.

Already someone is pulling in behind us.

The scouts have our stuff.

They go to the truck. There is an opening where the tote fits. The tote is then emptied automatically into the shredded inside the vehicle. Now, didn’t that take your breath away?

Let’s go on to the next adventure. You won’t believe this one. Curbside pickup at HOME DEPOT. (Dan will be so jealous)

This is the real thing for sure.

While waiting for our order, I spotted this guy with his dog. Twiggy and Lucy would never stay in a cart. The order arrives and is put in the rear, and off we go. No, human contact what so ever.

I had to take this snap of the social distance line up outside of Shipley’s Donuts. You know, if I were going to join a queue, it sure wouldn’t be Shipley Donuts. A pub maybe.

I’m glad you could go out with me today. I know it was a highpoint of your week.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt- Check/Cheque/Czech.

July 25, 2020July 24, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 58 Comments

It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again, and here is Linda Hill to explain this week’s prompt.

Thank you, John. By the way, you need a haircut.

“Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “check/cheque/Czech.” Use one, use ’em all, use ’em any way you’d like. Have fun!”

Thanks. Linda. If you would like to have fun, visit Linda’s blog and read how easy it is to join this troop of have funners. Here is the link.

https://lindaghill.com/2020/07/24/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-25-2020/

“Happy Saturday to you.”

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Uh, oh. Trouble in promptsville.”

“How’d you guess?”

“Long face. Since you are not a horse, I think you have the Linda Hill blues.”

“This prompt is trouble.”

“How so?”

“There are three different uses of check/cheque/Czech.”

“Why are you repeating yourself?”

“No. There are three different words. Here I’ve written them down. See?”

“Oh, now I get it. This is no big deal. Just make up a story using all three.”

“Easy for you.”

“Okay, for example. The big Czech walked into the bank to check on his cheque.”

“Then what?”

“Hey. This is not my prompt. It’s yours.”

“Fine. I think I’ll do a new one.”

“Go for it.”

“The Czeck asked the clerk if he could cash his cheque. She went to check with the manager. She came back with a sad face. “I’m sorry, but that cheque is drawn on a Czeck bank, and we have to check for the availability of funds.”

“What kind of check do you need to make on the Czeck cheque?” he said.

“The Czeck cheque needs a check on whether or not there is money to cover it in the account.”

“How long will the Czech cheque check take?”

“The Czech cheque check will take overnight.”

“I can’t wait that long. The Czech cheque check needs to done in time for dinner.”

“You can eat at my place. Then you won’t have to worry about the Czech cheque check.”

“That won’t work. I need the Czech cheque check done so I can pay for a hotel ro—”

“Okay hold on right there.”

“What?”

“What kind of story is going to turn out to be.”

“It’s a romance.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of. You have a very warped view of romance. I think you can wrap this up.

“They lived happily ever after.”

“Okay. Good.”

“Once they kicked their drug habit.”

“That will be fine.”

“And got out of jail.”

Friday JohnKu – AKA – TGIF

July 24, 2020July 23, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 72 Comments

“Look it is Friday.”
“Gee Lucy you. seem pretty excited.”
“I have to say I do like Friday.”

It is Friday again. In my mind this week went pretty fast. I really can’t explain it other than being really busy. Speaking of busy, I am over at Story Empire today talking about dialogue tags. Yeah, I know exciting stuff, eh? There might be some food for thought is you visit.

If you saw my post yesterday you know I’m getting ready to launch Eternal Road – The final stop. I will be making one more call for volunteers as we get closer to the time. Thanks to everyone who signed up already. If you missed the post here is the cover again.

COVID-19 continues to dominate the news. More cases here in Texas but some evidence that masks are causing infections to level off. I still wear mine. Of course, my going out time is limited.

You have to wonder when life will return to normal. There is turmoil everywhere and it seems we all are becoming more isolated due to questionable leadership, confusing information, and fractured communities. One has to wonder where to look for solid assurance that all will eventually be well. Today’s JohnKu lays out a hint as to where to look. I hope you all have a happy weekend. Stay safe.

When you need comfort,

A voice of authority . . .

Is found inside you.

Thursday – A Little Personal Eternal Road – The last stop Cover Reveal

July 23, 2020July 22, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 89 Comments

“Yes, Lucy, what is it?”

“Haven’t you been working on a new book?”

“Yeah, I sure have. The formatting is done. The cover is done.”

“Why isn’t the launch done?”

Eternal Road

“Well, the book is different from my previous ones.”

“It’s not a thriller?”

“No, it is a bunch of things.”

“Like what?”

Eternal road

“It has touches of inspiration, paranormal, metaphysical, time-travel, adventure, mystery, justice, and the supernatural.”

“Sounds like the kitchen sink.”

“It is the kind of story that has a lot of elements, but hopefully, the common theme of good challenged by evil will be an enjoyable read.”

“So when is the launch?”

Eternal road

“I’m planning for the first week of September.”

“Why wait?”

“I need to set up the launch plan.”

“Which includes asking for volunteers, right?

Eternal road

Nice segway, Lucy. I am looking for some volunteers to host the launch announcement. Each post will be unique and, hopefully, no more than one a day. So that you can consider being a volunteer here is the blurb.

Blurb

James Wainwright picks up a hitchhiker and discovers two things 1. The woman he picks up is his childhood sweetheart, only Seventeen years older. 2. He is no longer in this world.

James began a road trip alone in his 1956 Oldsmobile. He stops for a hitchhiker only to discover she is his childhood sweetheart, Sam, who disappeared seventeen years before. James learns that falling asleep miles back caused him to perish in a one-car accident. He also comes to understand that Sam was taken and murdered all those years ago, and now she has come back to help him find his eternal home.

The pair visit several time frames and places and are witness to a number of historical events. The rules dictate that they do no harm to the time continuum. Trying to be careful, they inadvertently come to the attention of Lucifer, who would love to have their souls subjected to his will. In their travels, they also discover a threat to human survival and desperately need to put in place the fix necessary to save humanity.

The question becomes, will James find his eternal home in grace or lose the battle with Satan for his immortal soul and the future of human life with it? If you like time-travel, adventure, mystery, justice, and the supernatural, this story is for you.

Posts will run in September, and Eternal Road – The final stop will be available for preorder at $0.99 for the e-book from September 1st to October 1st.

If you are interested, please snd me an e-mail at johnhowell(dot)wave(at)gmail(dot)com

Eternal road

Well, and good, but where’s the cover?

“Good point. Here it is. Thanks for your help today.”

“Sometimes, you need a shove. Glad to do it. Is that a treat up there?”

Wednesday Story Day – AKA – Hump Day

July 22, 2020July 21, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 70 Comments

It is Wednesday Story Day again, and last week we were there when Lazar Popović’s lawyer showed up. I guess we were surprised that he got there so fast. After Lazar place the call, he must have jumped into his car and took a beeline to the lockup. In any case, Lazar has the right to a lawyer during questioning. I see that the lieutenant has fetched the lawyer, and they are all gathered in the interrogation room. Let’s get over there, so we don’t miss anything.

“So, Mr. Popović Let me formally introduce myself and the team. I’m Lieutenant Mayfield, this is Larry Dunfee, and Andrew Cummings from the Boston police department. You, of course, know your lawyer … uh.”

“Jerry Stannis, lieutenant.”

“Yeah. Thanks, Jerry. Which reminds me. Mr. Popović, our readers, get way too confused with the Serbian names. Do you mind if I call you Lazar?”

“Readers?”

“Yeah don’t worry, Jerry. It’s a fourth wall situation.”

“I don’t care what you call me, Lieutenant. Just let me outta here.”

“I’m afraid that’s not going to happen, Lazar.”

“Not to interrupt this little social chat, lieutenant, but what is my client charged with if you don’t mind?”

“Not at all, Jerry. About a hundred felony counts of illegal possession of controlled substances.”

“Where did you get that number?”

“Given all the boxes and bales of drugs, I came up with an estimate.”

“My client would like to exercise his right to remain silent.”

“I’m sure he would. I just need to know if you are open to any kind of deal that we could arrange should your client co-operate in finding the source of these drugs.”

“We can always talk, but I need to know the particulars before I commit.”

“Well, right no,w your client is looking at maybe a hundred years without parole eligibility. I think we could get the DA to agree to something that might get him twenty with the possibility of parole. This would mean he’d be out in seven with good behavior. At his age, there are a lot of years after seven. Not too many after one hundred.”

“Excuse me, gentleman.”

“Yes, Lazar?”

“You don’t know how this system works. If I shoot my mouth off chances are, I won’t even serve a year before someone sticks a shive in my heart.”

“We could guarantee protection.”

“Impossible lieutenant. Do you know how easy it is to control a 24 dollar an hour guard? All you have to do is threaten his family or drop ten grand in his bank account. I wouldn’t be safe no matter where I was or who was protecting me.”

“So, you are just going to take the fall?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“What did you mean then?”

“I can give you all the information you need to put an end to a major source of drugs for the West Coast.”

“In exchange for what?”

“Federal witness protection, and this case moved to federal jurisdiction.”

“I understand the witness protection, but why federal jurisdiction?”

“You know, Taggert the local DA?”

“Yeah.”

“He’s involved. Now I’m saying no more until I see the deal in writing.”

“I hope you can back your claims with evidence.”

“Don’t worry, Lieutenant, I have plenty of evidence.”

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #272 by Keith Channing

July 21, 2020July 20, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 65 Comments

In Keith’s words.

“Using this photo ( below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6 pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next Monday.”

The photo.

Kreative Kue # 272

“I think it is rising.”

“You got to be kidding me. I think it is falling.”

“In either case, what is it?”

“Darned if I know. Maybe we should ask mum.”

“She looks as confused as us. I don’t think she will be much help. Besides other than throwing down a bowl of food, when has she ever answered a question from you?”

“Well, there was that time I whined at the door, and she let me out.”

“That is called rug preservation. She wasn’t really giving you an answer.”

“I suppose you are right. That thing looks bigger.”

“You were right. It is a sign that it is falling.”

“How did you get so smart?”

“Pop used to throw a ball in the air. As it came down, it looked bigger. I’m not smart, just observant.”

“Do you think we should get out of the way if that thing is falling?”

“Now you are showing some smarts. By my calculation, given the length of time, that thing has been up there, and given its relative size right now, it is bigger than a breadbox.”

“Maybe we should take off now.”

“What about mum.”

“Let me give her a couple of barks.”

“Oh good, she notices us. Let’s run.”

“Is she following?”

“Man, I’ve never seen her move that fast. I think she’s going to overtake us.”

“You hear that?”

“I felt it even.”

“That thing hit the ground.”

“Let’s go back. I’ll give mum a heads up.”

“What is it?”

“I’m not sure. M-O-S-L-E-R, S-A-F-E, C-O-M-P-A-N-Y”

“What does it mean?”

“Don’t know, but mum is running back to the house.”

“You mean skipping back to the house.”

“Maybe it’s her Amazon Prime delivery. She always gets excited about that.”

Top Ten Things Not to Do on the First Around the World Solo flight with Wiley Post in 1933

July 20, 2020July 20, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 56 Comments

This week marks the 87th anniversary of Wiley Post’s solo flight around the world, which he accomplished in 1933. We all would love to be with him on the plane. There is one problem in that If we join him on the flight it would not be a solo for him. I think we can work out something where time travelers don’t count as real people. (Oh, come on. Work with me here.) If you want to go, you need to take a list of things not to do so that we don’t put a big ole rip in the time continuum.

10. If you are going on the flight, do not ask if we are there yet. If you do, at best, Wiley will be too busy to hear you. At worst, since you said it just after take-off, Wiley is going to let you test the spare parachute. (I think it would have been good to wait a little linger, Lyonia. After all, the flight lasted 7 days, 18 hours, and 49 minutes. Yeah, that strap goes between your legs. No, I don’t know what you yell, going out the door.)

9 If you are going on the flight, do not ignore Tiny the WWF champ when he tells you your suitcase is too heavy. If you do, at best, Tiny will get distracted. At worst, Tiny will figure out a way to lighten it for you. (You see, Lysander, Tiny is in charge of loading the plane, and he is not used to being ignored. Oh, look. He has dumped your suitcase on the tarmac. You sure that is your suitcase. Those are pretty fancy unmentionables you have there.)

8 If you are going on the flight, do not ask when the beverage service starts. If you do, at best, the noise of the aircraft will effectively mute you. At worst, Wiley will offer that you test the guest parachute, but unfortunately, it has already been tested by Lyonia. (This presents a problem, Liam. I think I would tell Mr. Post that you are okay for now. Might be more comfortable than learning to skydive with no chute.)

7 If you are going on the flight, do not ask where the first-class section is located. If you do, at best, Wiley will think you are joking. At worst, when he discovers you are not, he will make you a private first-class section in the back. (Don’t look now, Lucas, but you are sitting in what used to be called the mailbag section. I agree it is not very comfortable. Too bad you can’t stand up either.)

6 If you are going on the flight, do not touch anything in the cockpit. If you do, at best, it won’t be essential. At worst, you just shut off the Sperry autopilot device. (I would tell Wiley, Levi. Yeah, he’s going to be mad at you, but that will be better than getting lost over Russia.)

5 If you are going on the flight, do not make fun of the plane’s name Winnie Mae. If you do, at best, Wiley will be on the radio and not hear you. At worst, he’ll explain that the plane was named after his first mentor’s daughter. (Now you have a choice, Leo. Give a big ole apology or take a big ole step into the atmosphere. I thought you would choose the former.)

4 If you are going on the flight, do not pretend you know how to speak Russian. If you do, at best, there will be no need for an interpretation. At worst, the autopilot will need repair, and the only place to stop is Russia. (What are you going to do now, Lawrence? The instrument needs repair, and everyone is looking at you for directions. I think it might be time to hit the way back button. Those Russian soldiers don’t have much of a sense of humor.)

3 If you are going on the flight, do not ask Wiley Post about his eyepatch. If you do, at best, he will ignore you. At worst, he tells you the story of how he lost his eye in great detail. (Hold on Lorenzo. Wiley is getting to the exciting part where a piece of drilling equipment took his eye in 1926. I know it is a little gruesome, but you had to ask.)

2 If you are going on the flight, do not bring up Wiley’s career as an armed robber. If you do, at best, he will want to laugh it off. At worst, he’ll tell you the story. ( You’ve heard the expression, “If I tell you then I’ll have to kill you?” Lance. Well, Wiley did 12 months for stealing a car in 1921. He does have a murderous look in his eye.)

1 If you are going on the flight, do not ask Wiley how many award miles you will get for the trip. If you do, at best he will not understand you. At worst, he will tell you that you will have earned enough miles to win a Bentley Turbo. (You have to wonder why he keeps laughing, Larry. I think you may be the butt of a Wiley flying solo 1933 joke.)

Views of the Neighborhood – Signs, Signs, Everywhere Are Signs

July 19, 2020July 18, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 81 Comments

If you read my Friday post, you know that the pandemic is making Views harder to come by. So now I’m doing my best. I thought I use the theme of signs. Also, there is a video of the title song at the end. Hope you enjoy the walk.

Views of the neighborhood

Sign of needing to move.

Sign of wanting to play.

Sign of patriotism.

Sign of helping others.

Sign of the times.

Sign of hope for some.

Sign of something new.

Sign of a carefree day.

Sign of protection.

Views of the Neighborhood

Sign of a message worth repeating.

Sign of safety.

Sign of commerce.

Sign of conservation.

Well, that’s it. Enjoy the video and help yourself to an ice-cold water. You must be parched. Good thing, it is cooler today. Only 93 degrees.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – Link

July 18, 2020July 17, 2020 ~ John W. Howell ~ 45 Comments

It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again, and here is Linda Hill to explain this week’s prompt. “Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “link.” Use it as a noun or a verb; use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!”

Thanks, Linda. If you would like to join up and enjoy prompts like this, visit Linda’s blog and read how. Even an idiot can do this. Just look at me. Here is the link (Hey, one point already)