Wednesday Story Day – AKA – Hump Day

Wednesday Hump Day
“Lucy, Lucy, Lucy.”
“Yes, Little One?”
“Is it Friday yet?”
“Ten more naps till Friday.”
“My naps or yours?”
“Mine, of course.”
“Poo.”

Sorry, this post is a little late. I had a scheduling problem this morning.

It is Wednesday Story Day time again, and last week we witnessed the arrival of a couple of Nevada State troopers who are operating on the direction of the Reno District Attorney. Yeah, this was the same DA who seemed to believe Larry and Andrew shot some citizens for no reason. I see the troopers have delivered our heroes to the DA’s office, so I think we better get there.

“Please have a seat, gentlemen. Mr. Taggett will be with you in a moment.”

“Thank you, officers. We appreciate the ride and the security.”

“Just doing our job, detective. We’ll be right outside.”

“Wait until they are gone, Andrew.”

“Why are you always saying that?”

“I just don’t want you making a slip in front of people is all.”

“He who walks on ice is talking about a slip. Okay, they are gone. Can I speak?”

“Sure. Go ahead.”

“We have a warrant burning a hole in our pocket. By my watch, we have less than twelve hours to use it.”

“I know, but as you can see, we now have friends in high places.”

“You sure about that?”

“I’m as sure as I can be. Hold on here’s a call from the Chief.”

“Our chief?”

“Yes. Sush. Hi Chief. Yes, we are fine. Right now? We are sitting in the waiting room of ADA Spenser Taggert. No, we haven’t talked to him yet. A couple of State Troopers brought us here. Yes, sir, I understand you and the DA had a conversation with Taggert. Huh? The troopers told me. Okay, I understand. Yes, sir, we will. Goodbye, sir.”

“What the heck?”

“The chief says Taggert will give us full cooperation.”

“Why don’t I think that is a good thing?”

“Yeah, I have the same feeling about Taggert. I still think someone has him under their thumb. Well, worst-case scenario, I get my gun back, and we are no better or worse off than when we arrived.”

“A lot of crap has gone on for a zero-sum gain.”

“I think a lot of folks would agree with you.”

“Folks? What folks?”

“Just a manner of speaking. Once we are through here, we need to get to the Hyatt and finally determine if we can nail Mrs. Rafferty with lying.”

“Did the chief offer any other words of advice.”

“Yeah, he said to keep a low profile and to be polite to Taggert.”

“Handy advice, huh?”

“Someone is coming. Later on, my comments.”

“Hello, Gentlemen. Please come in.”

“Thank you, Mr. Taggert.”

“Oh, call me Spencer. After all, we are on the same team.”

“Okay, Spencer.”

“Can I get you a coffee?”

“No, I think we are good. I’m guessing you have talked to the Chief of police in Boston.”

“Oh, yes. Charming man. He actually called my boss, and we all had a nice conversation about a path forward through this mess. I do want to apologize for treating you like persons of interest, but I needed to be careful.”

“Oh, I understand. Believe me, having a couple of guys come into your area of jurisdiction would be a cause of concern.”

“Guys who killed a couple of men, I might add.”

“No hard feelings, Spencer.”

“Nice to hear you say that. I, of course, had a lot of explaining to do.”

“I can imagine. No hare feelings on your part then?”

“Let’s say that my office has been directed to help as much as possible. Let’s start by giving you back your weapon. “

“Thank you.”

“Now, if you will excuse me, I have a full agenda today. Please let me know how I can help.”

“We will.”

“One more thing.”

“Yes, sir?”

“Please keep me in the loop on what you find out.”

“You can count on that. We will be going now.”

“Good day, then.”

“Yes, good day. Get up Andrew, we are leaving.”

“Need to ask.”

“Wait until we are outside, Andrew.”

“Slip sliding away. The nearer your destination, the more it keeps slip-sliding away.”

“Very funny.”

 

 

Tuesday – Anything possible – Kreative Kue #232 with Keith Channing

In Keith’s words.

“Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next Monday.”

The photo.

The Store by John W. Howell © 2019

“Excuse me. Do you work here?”

“This orange apron with my name written with a Sharpie by a two-year-old says I do.”

“Oh, good. I really could use some help.”

“Well, sir, as our motto says, “No item too obscure for us not to carry it.”

“Huh?”

“Just retail humor, sir. I’d be glad to help you out. Now, which way did you come in?”

“More retail humor, I’ll bet.”

“Yes, sir. Seriously now. What can I do to help.”

“See this screw.”

“Yes, sir, I do. Rather small little thing, but I do see it.”

“I need another one just like it.”

“That shouldn’t be too hard, sir. Follow me.”

“Oh, thank you. I have been wandering around for hours, it seems.”

“Goodness, do you need some water?”

“I could use some, I suppose.”

“Here, take this canteen.”

“Canteen?”

“Yup. We are required to carry a canteen in cases like this.”

“Is this sanitary?”

“Don’t worry, sir. I have never been accused of backwash yet.”

“Thanks, I’ll wait until I leave.”

“It is ten miles to the exit, sir. I think you will thank me for the water later.”

“Fine. There now I feel better.”

“Ah, here we are at screw acres.”

“Screw acres?”

“Yeah, that’s the name of the section. Don’t tell me you are one of those weirdos who makes a sexual innuendo out of everything.”

“Where are my screw sizes.”

“Sir, I’m going to ask you to stop. You are making me uncomfortable.”

“I just want to get my screw and get out of here.”

“Understood, sir. You. will have to wait to get home for that. Anyway, here is the section for tiny screws.”

“Here is my size. Wait, does this come in a quantity less than 10,000.”

“I’m afraid that is our smallest, sir.”

“Who buys that many screws?”

“You’d be surprised, sir. Now is there anything else I can help you with?”

“I guess you could give me directions to the exit.”

“Don’t you have a map app on your phone?”

“Yes, I do.”

“It would be a lot easier for you to do that. Once you have the directions, I think you can hitchhike your way there.”

“Hitchhike?”

“Yeah, all the carts with loads usually stop for pedestrians. Good luck to you, sir.”

“Wait.”

“Yes, sir?”

“I still don’t have my screw.”

“I would try our on-line store, sir.”

“Online store?”

“Yes, sir. https://saveatriptohell.com.”

“Thanks.”

“Always happy to help. Bye, sir.”

“I wonder if I will wake up now?”

 

Top Ten Things Not to Do at the First Live Radio Broadcast of a Football Game in 1921

Ten things not to do

 

This week marks the anniversary of the first live radio broadcast of a football game in 1921. The game was played at Forbes Field in Pittsburgh. The announcer was Harold W. Arlin of radio station KDKA. The University of Pittsburgh Panthers beat the West Virginia University Mountaineers by a score of 21 to 13. (Not much has changed there. This rivalry began in 1895, and so far, the University of Pittsburgh has won the meeting more times than West Virginia University. It is called the Back Yard Brawl since the two schools are only 70 miles from each other.) I think we ought to go to the game rater than listen on the radio. Well, bring the radio along too. It might be fun to see how close the announcer describes the real action. As usual, there are rules to follow, so we don’t create a tear in the time continuum. Take this list with you.

Top Ten Things Not to Do at the First Live Radio Broadcast of a Football Game.

10 If you are at the game, do not think you can listen to the broadcast on streaming audio via iHeart Radio. If you do, at best those around you will be too interested in the game to notice your cell phone. At worst, the usher will spot your phone and ask you to follow him. (For heaven sakes, Jacquez don’t go. You really want to explain that you are from the year 2019? There will be a padded room reserved for you.)

9 If you are at the game, do not tell Tiny the WWF Champ and hot dog vendor that his hot dogs are old. If you do, at best he will think you said cold and will laugh at the joke. At worst, Tiny who just left his self-esteem support group will think you are criticizing him. (No matter what you say, Jad you are in for an overhead pinwheel and body toss just as if you were in the ring. The landing on the bleachers, however, is not going to be as soft as the ring.)

8 If you are at the game, do not wear your Mountaineer coon-skin cap while sitting in the Pitt section. If you do, at best a kindly person behind you will ask you to remove it. At worst a not so kindly person behind you will remove it. (There you have it, Jadrein. Your hat is back and filled with who knows what liquid. No, don’t drink out of your hat you idiot. You have no idea what that is even though it looks like beer.)

7 If you are at the game, do not suggest to the fans to burn a sofa when they get home to Morgantown. If you do, at best WVU is ahead at the time. At worst, the fan will think you are a Pitt fan. (You see, Jael WVU fans only burn sofas when they win. That big guy with the red eyes and WVU shirt thinks you are mocking him.)

6 If you are at the game, do not suggest to the Pitt fans that the game be played next year in Morgantown. If you do, at best they will laugh at your joke. At worst, they will think you are a WVU fan. (The first game of the rivalry was not played in Morgantown until 1963. Is it any wonder these Pitt fans are now crowd surfing you to the exit, Jafari?)

5 If you are at the game, do not bring your Mountaineer musket into the stands. If you do, at best most of the fans will clear out. At worst, you will come face to face with several Pitt fans all dressed as panthers. (What are you going to do now, Jagmeet. The way they are growling they seem to be serious.)

4 If you are at the game, do not tease Roc the panther. If you do, at best Roc will be used to it. At worst, Roc has made up his mind to bite the twelveth person who teases him. (Not so good news, Jahi. The eleventh just left.)

3 If you are at the game, do not sing the WVU fight song if you don’t know the words. If you do, at best the noise will drown you out. At worst, your fellow WVU fans will come to the realization you are different. ( Lucky for you, Jahnu you now get to see the game from the parking lot.)

2 If you are at the game, do not try to find a plug for that old Philco radio. If you do, at best you burn a lot of calories. At worst, someone will eventually come to believe you sole the radio. (Hauling it up and down the stadium stairs made you look very much out of place, Jair. Maybe you should just park it in the clubhouse. Wait, there’s a plug.)

1 If you are at the game, do not start quoting stats of the various players. If you do, at best people will move away from you. At worst, they will think you are from a different planet. (In the 20’s hardly anyone paid attention to the stats, Jaison. It was a matter of win or lose. All those yards gained rushing and passing as well as turnovers were blurred by actually watching the game instead of a talking head.)

Views of the Neighborhood – Water

Water is vital to all of us. In Lakeway, we have had very little rain for the last two months. This week’s View of the Neighborhood is focused on our Water supply

Here is a photo that was taken in May of the kayak launch site on Lake Travis.

Lakeway water

Here it was yesterday. Notice the water is twenty feet away.

A photo of the lake in May

A shot of the lake from yesterday. A lot of lawn. Lake Travis is the source of Lakeway’s water.

The Lakeway Municipal Utility District (LMUD for short)

The District office. LMUD is a nonprofit organization providing water to the Lakeway community. In 2009 LMUD won the best tasting water in Texas competition. LMUD also developed water reuse systems for irrigation of the golf courses, airpark, and city property.

In the fall of 1987, the first elevated storage tank was installed in Lakeway to enhance water pressure.. It had a golfball design reflecting the resort nature of the community. The ball was hand-painted by a crew suspended by ropes 487 feet above the ground.

The second elevated storage tank.

The latest tank put into service in 2019 to meet the increasing demands of a growing city.

We are all very conscious of the need to conserve water.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Tast”

Stream of Consciousness

 

It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday and this week’s prompt is … Wait, I think I’ll let Linda Hill explain it. Here are her words.

“Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “-tast-.” Find a word that contains “tast” and use it in your post. Enjoy!”

If you would like to have similar fun, go to Linda’s blog and read how easy it is. Here is the link.

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Oct. 5/19

“Tast” by John W. Howell © 2019

“Why are you laughing?”

“This week’s prompt gave me the giggles.”

“What is it?”
“To use a word with tast in it.”

“Tast? Sounds hard to me.”

“Fantastic.”

“What’s fantastic? That it sounds hard to me?”

“No fantastic has tast in it.”

“Oh. You are so right.”

“Here’s another one. Bumtastic.”

“Meaning?”

“Nice bum.”

“Oh, come on. That’s not a word.”

“Recognized by scrabble.”

“Scrabbletastic.”

“Now you’re getting it.”

“I was just kidding.”

“Unfantastic. I love this one, snarktastic.”

“Good snark, right?”

“Right you are.”

“Cheesetastic.”

“Huh.”

“Good cheese.”

“Okay, I think we are done.”

“What? You started it.”

“Linda Hill started it.”

“True. Promptastic.”

“I feel poptastic.”

“Trip the Miller lightastic?”

“Brotastic.”

 

Friday JohnKu – AKA – TGIF

“Look Lucy. Friday is here.”
“I see it Little One. Thank goodness.”

 

It is Friday and it came just in time.

As you may know I’m helping C.S.Boyack with his launch of Viral Blues his new book. If you haven’t visited yet here is the link. I’m reading it now and am enjoying it.

I’m happy to say the first draft of my new book is done. I now  need to let it rest for a few and then go back for the second run through. It is amazing to me what can be done when you make a committment. Thanks to all of you for your encouragement during the process. Today’s JohnKu talks about a journey. I hope you all have a great weekend.

The journey by John W. Howell © 2019

The first step starts it,

Then it is rinse and repeat . . .

Until you are home.

Lisa Burton Visits to Talk About C. S. Boyack’s New Book – Viral Blues

It is always lovely to welcome Lisa Burton to my place for a chat.  As most of you know by now, Lisa is the personal assistant to writer C.S.Boyack, and the last time she visited, we talked at the coast. I’m so glad she was able to get through the Austin traffic to join me here today. So welcome Lisa. Have a cup of coffee . . . Oh, wait. You don’t drink coffee or anything else. Well anyway, tell us what you are up to these days.

Thanks for having me over, John. Love the new place, but I kind of miss the beach. Craig has me on the road promoting his newest book, “Viral Blues.” I really enjoyed this one, because I get to be in it.

It started off as a sequel to “The Hat,” and it is, but Craig included a bunch of his existing characters in a kind of team-up story. Lizzie and The Hat are the lead, in that they walk readers in and out of the story, but a lot of us got a second chance to shine. In fact, bear with me while I access the Internet…

To quote an older review, by John Howell, “The Playground… is about a badder than bad badass who has been hired to hunt down a guy who has some code some other guy wants to recover.”

That’s my way of saying that Clovis is also making an appearance in Viral Blues. He’s kind of helpful in his own way. There are times when a robot girl can’t find the data online, and another method is required. There are some pretty handy folks who make up our team, but Clovis was indispensable. He also has a really cute dog, and I’m a sucker for animals.

The story begins when we all got invitations to a cryptic meeting. Gina Greybill is the head of a secret society. They’ve uncovered a plot to tamper with the nation’s vaccine supply. There are supernatural tracks all over this evidence and it’s the group’s job to sort it all out.

I got the chance to do a little corporate spying, and took over a drone to scope out a hotbed of activity. I even managed to do a little shopping along the way.

Lizzie has a pretty weak sense of style, and since she fronts a band, I decided to help her out a little. Her hat is actually a creature from another dimension, and can be any kind of hat she wants. That’s pretty handy from a fashion sense, so I worked from there. The big deal is that Lizzie has to pack heat. She has to drape something to cover her revolvers, so it makes it hard to wear a nice knit dress or anything like that.

Things got a little hairy, even creepy at a couple of points, and while I can’t speak for the others, I had a good time. I think readers will, too. I hope your fans will give it a chance.

Part of being Craig’s spokesmodel is handing out my posters. This one was from “The Hat,” But it’s still appropriate. I’m posing as Lizzie, and this particular hat caused a lot of grief. The hat had never worked with a woman before, and he was kind of embarrassed about it.

Thank you, Lisa. I’m sure this book will be as enjoyable as The Hat. I just started reading it and can say it is a good read so far. Here is the blurb as well as the purchase link. Also, C.S Boyack’s bio and other links are below the blurb.

***

Blurb:

Someone knows about the hat. The creature from another dimension that helps Lizzie fight against the creatures of darkness.

They are summoned to a cryptic meeting with a secret society, where they meet other people with enhanced skills. It turns out someone, or something, has been tampering with the world’s vaccine supply. The goal doesn’t appear to be political or financial, but biblical pestilence.

Can this group of loners come together in time to make a difference when even the proper authorities are obstacles?

Check out Viral Blues, for your dose of paranormal adventure, with a strong sample of dark humor. And in recent superhero style, don’t miss the secret last chapter after the back material.

Purchase link: http://mybook.to/ViralBlues

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Thursday – A Little Personal – Lucy and Twiggy Promote Charles Yallowitz’s War of Nytefall Series at $0.99

Twiggy and Lucy

“Okay, boss. Whats that thing below us there?”

“It is a photo showing all of Charles Yallowitz’s  War of Nytefall Series which are on sale for $0.99 each for the month of October.”

Twiggy and Lucy

“Oh thank goodness. Here I thought it was a bag of some kind of new dog food.”

“Me too, Lucy. Not sure I could handle that.”

“These are Fantasy and Vampire stories, right Twiggy?”

“Not sure Lucy. I think so but I have a hard time holding books.”

“If I didn’t know better I would say you just told a joke.”

“Yeah, I think I did. Where can people who can hold a reader get War of Nytefall?”

“You just gave the link in your question.”

“I did? What’s a link?”

“Please excuse Twiggy folks. She doesn’t get out much.”

“Yeah. I wish Mom would let me out right now.”

“I would rush to get these books at $.99. They are also available for 99 Pence in the UK and discounts at other sites as well. As for me I’ve worked hard enough as a spokesperson. Nap time.

“Currency exchange makes my head hurt, Lucy. Heres the US link again.”

War of Nytefell

Wednesday Story Day – AKA – Hump Day

“Twiggy. What’s up.”
“It’s only Wednesday. I thought it was Friday.”

 

It is Wednesday Story Day again, and last week we were there when Larry and Andrew (mostly Andrew) decided to take the offer to go back to Boston to conduct further investigations from there. They went back inside and informed Nobel of their decision. He, of course, praised their wisdom and immediately summoned Rocko and Lance and ordered them to take Larry and Andrew to their car and then to the hotel to check out. Rocko and Lance, we delighted to comply with Nobel’s orders. The car was collected, and Rocco drove it to the hotel. I see that Lance has pulled up in front of Larry and Andrew’s hotel with Rocco right behind. I think we better go there now. The conversation might be interesting.

“Well, gentlemen, here we are. You two go inside, pack your bags, and check out. Rocco will go with you, so you don’t get lost so to speak. I’ll wait here and then drive you to the airport.”

“Thanks, Larry. You know it’s in the middle of the night, and the airport will be closed.”

“Don’t you worry your pretty little head, detective. We have a special airplane just waiting for you.”

“A private plane?”

“You got it, son. Mr. Nobel is sparing no expense to make sure you and your fat assed friend are well taken care of.”

“Excuse me, my dear man.”

“Yeah what?”

“This is a well-honed body of an aristocrat. I object to the plebian term ‘fat assed.”’

“Well too bad for you grandpa. Now get out of the car and go with Rocco.”

“Real nice Lance. Let’s go, Andrew.”

“Don’t slam that door either.”

“Hey, Rocco.”

“Yes, detective.”

“You supposed to watch us, huh?”

“You got the right idea. Don’t get cute either.”

“You don’t have to worry about us. We know how to behave. Hey. Rocco take a look. Two Nevada State Troopers headed our way.”

“Excuse me gentlemen but is one of you detective Dunfee?”

“Yes sergeant, I’m detective Dunfee.”

“Would you please come with us, sir?”

“Uh is there a problem sergeant?”

“ Step over here detective this is for your ears only. There’s no problem, detective. The District Attorney in Reno got a call from the DA in Boston, and we’ve been asked to make certain you are safe.”

“Safe? Is that what was said? We are in danger?”

“Sir I would rather talk to you in a private place. Who are these men?”

“The big dumb looking one is my associate, and the other one is a goon who was about to take us for a ride to the airport.”

“I see. You sir, what’s your name.”

“It’s Rocco, officer.”

“Okay, Rocco. I’m not going to ask for an ID nor do I want to take the time to fill out a bunch of paperwork, but I am going to ask you to find your way back to wherever you came from, Ok?”

“Sure, officer no problem. I’ll just get in the car and be gone.”

“Good move. Now Mr. Dunfee if you and your associate would go to your room. It’s late, and you probably could use some sleep. The officer and I will be outside your room. In the morning we need to go downtown to the DA’s office where you can ask all the questions you need. Is that okay.”

“We are bushed Sergeant, so I think that makes a lot of sense. Thank you.”

“After you, sir. We are right behind you.”

“Talk about white knight, huh, Andrew?”

“Yes, Larry, this seems good. Can we talk about ‘big dumb-looking?”’

“Term of endearment, Andrew. Just a term of endearment.”

“I can think of others if you would like.”

“Hahaha. Okay, sweetheart.”

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue # 231 by Keith Channing

In Keith’s words

“Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next Monday.”

The Photo

Kreative Kue #231

Again by John W. Howell © 2019

“Alphie come look.”

“What is is m’ love?”

“The rubbish bid has been tipped again.”

“Ack those boys.”

“Yes, and you need to set it right.”

“Me? Why not just let the rubbish blokes take care of it?”

“You know full well those blighters won’t lift a finger to right the thing. They’ll just pass by.”

“Okay but I’m getting distraught with this goings-on.”

“I know, dear, but what can we do?”

“Post a camera out by the bin and catch the little maggots who are doing this mischief.”

“Good idea. Let’s see. A camera and line feed couldn’t be more than two hundred pounds—”

“I get it, Bertie. For two-hundred pounds I can make many trips to the bin.”

“There we are, my smart man. Now pop off and set the bin right and I’ll put the water on for a lovely cuppa.”

“Ah, the shortest distance to getting what you want done, is through a tea strainer.”

“And a wee scone.”

“Be still my beating heart.”

“Now go on with ya and wear your scarf. It looks like a bit of chill in the air.”