Charles Yallowitz is a prolific and talented writer who has published 42 titles in multiple genres. His latest is a book for the rest of us. He lays out inside tips on the writing craft, which are useful to all writers regardless of genre choice. For a limited time, the e-book can be had for 99¢. Here’s the cover.
Here’s the link.
Curious about craftwork? Tempted to try writing fantasy? Then grab a copy of Do I Need to Use a Dragon?as a 99 cents eBook!
Here’s Charles’ bio.
About Charles Yallowitz
Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn’t working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. ‘Legends of Windemere’ is his first series, but it certainly won’t be his last.
Thistledown — Midsummer Bedlam by Teagan Ríordáin Geneviene is now available in book form (Kindle and paperback). If you think you’re too old for a tale about faeries, it also has a dark side. For those who read the serial version at Teagan’s Books (blog), she added a little something to the ending that you haven’t seen.
Here’s Teagan to tell you a little about the story.
John, thanks so much for hosting the launch of my launch of Thistledown — Midsummer Bedlam. It is a tale of faeries written for whimsical grownups, but suitable for children of all ages.
In 2017, readers of my blog,Teagan’s Books, named many of the fairies (or faeries, as I prefer to call them). The characters are not based on the real people. They are just a way for me to recognize the people who followed Thistledown. Many people used a “fairy name key” based on their initial and month of birth. However, I wasn’t satisfied with most of those first-names for my male characters. So I created their first names myself. I want to introduce “Pick Dragonfly” to your readers.
A fairy army, as illustrated by Sir J. Noel Paton, 1870. Wikimedia
Because of his extensive travels, Pick Dragonfly is perhaps the most famous citizen of Thistledown. He wears a Panama style hat that he got in some faraway place. Pick’s unique talent magically “picks” the fruit from trees, and it rolls across the orchard to wherever he sits.
Here’s the Book Blurb
Thistledown ― Midsummer Bedlam, by Teagan Ríordáin Geneviene is a wildly whimsical tale of faeries. It was originally written for a grownup audience, but it is suitable for children ages eight and over.
Thistledown is a world of color and light. It has faeries, hummingbirds, and ancient books of magic. Bedlam Thunder is a misfit faery who is afraid of heights. She is also a seer who has terrible visions of a parallel world devoid of color and brightness. The hate and darkness of that colorless world is seeping into Thistledown. Will Bedlam and her friends be able to save their home?
Thistledown ― Midsummer Bedlam, with its radiant creatures and faeries will lift your imagination to new heights.
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In celebration of the launch of War of Nytefall, I invited Charles to take over the Top Ten duties for today. Also, it is Charles’ birthday so today is very special. Without delay, I give you Charles E. Yallowitz.
A big thanks to John, especially for letting me do one of his famous ‘Top 10’ lists in order to promote my new book. Since my latest fantasy adventure series, War of Nytefall: Loyalty, revolves around vampires, we’re going to go over some warnings to keep in mind. (For fun, check out the opposing list on My Train of Thoughts On . . .)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not try to invite them to brunch. If you do, at best they’ll be a Dawn Fang and say they aren’t hungry. At worst, you will end up eating across from a pile of ashes and be asked to leave since it’s a non-smoking establishment. (You didn’t even get your third mimosa!)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not show off your crucifix collection. If you do, at best they’ll run away, and the friendship is over. At worst, they’ll take offense at the pushing of a stereotype and break the cross handed down through the generations over your head. (The time he invited you to a Passover Seder might have been a clue that this wouldn’t work.)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not repeatedly ask them if they hang out at high schools. If you do, at best you’ll end up sitting through a long rant about how Joss Whedon and Stephanie Meyers should be sued for defamation of character. At worst, you’ll be stripped naked and put in the nearest school gym locker to see how you like being called a pervert. (What is it with humans and having vampires go after jailbait?)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not challenge them to a boxing match. If you do, at best you will be knocked out with one punch and wake up in the hospital. At worst, your head will sail through the window, across the street, and land in the punch bowl of the latest meeting of the ‘Sufferers of Decapitation Nightmares’. (Tiny the WWF Champ never could hold back.)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not eat food with tons of garlic. If you do, at best your friend will be a Dawn Fang and politely flick a mint into your mouth. At worst, the vampire goes into anaphylactic shock and ends up in the hospital. (No, doctor, I’m sure this person has a pulse, and it’s the machine that’s wrong.)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not take them to the House of Mirrors. If you do, at best they’ll not see their reflection and play pranks on the other people. At worst, they will see their reflection and be violently embarrassed by a large scrap of jogger stuck in their fangs. (It’s hard enough to floss without sword-like teeth stabbing you in the hand.)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not talk to them with a corny Dracula accent. If you do, at best they’ll tell you to stop being an idiot. At worst, you’ll learn that Dracula was their uncle and you really shouldn’t make fun of his speech impediment. (Not his fault his fangs were four times larger than that of your average vampire. In fact, most women would say . . . Okay, moving on.)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not ask to try what they’re drinking. If you do, at best you’ll get sick and learn your lesson. At worst, you’ll find that you enjoy the taste and go on a feeding frenzy as the ghoulish servant of your new master. (That’s for eating all that garlic. Even a human would have found that stench nauseating.)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not tell everyone around that your friend is a blood-drinking creature. If you do, at best people won’t believe you and call the men in white suits. At worst, you’ll find out how many vampire hunters are in the area and be the only one left to explain all the bodies to the cops. (There’s a reason we don’t announce ourselves, Billy!)
If you are hanging out with a vampire, do not insist on watching ‘Blade’ every time you hang out. If you do, at best they’ll say yes. At worst . . . You know what? That’s going to be fine. Even vampires will admit to loving that movie. Just tone down the garlic popcorn this time. (Seriously, do you eat that much to counter a chronic health condition?)
Book Blurb
In the wake of the Great Cataclysm, a new predator will emerge within Windemere’s shadow.
For fifty years, Clyde has remained buried while the rest of the vampires have been battling against their enemies. Only Mab believes that her former partner survived his execution and is determined to bring him back to the city of Nyte. Retrieving the vampiric thief is only the beginning as he comes out of the ground stronger, faster, and demonstrating powers that their kind have never witnessed throughout their ancient history. Thrown into the war, Clyde must be careful to hide his true nature while fighting alongside his old friends. Too bad he is having so much fun that keeping his secret might be furthest from his mind.
Will anyone be ready for the rise of the Dawn Fangs?
Charles Yallowitz was born and raised on Long Island, NY, but he has spent most of his life wandering his own imagination in a blissful haze. Occasionally, he would return from this world for the necessities such as food, showers, and Saturday morning cartoons. One day he returned from his imagination and decided he would share his stories with the world. After his wife decided that she was tired of hearing the same stories repeatedly, she convinced him that it would make more sense to follow his dream of being a fantasy author. So, locked within the house under orders to shut up and get to work, Charles brings you Legends of Windemere. He looks forward to sharing all of his stories with you, and his wife is happy he finally has someone else to play with.
I am so pleased to be part of the launch of Charles Yallowitz’s final volume of the Legends of Windemere series. Welcome, Charles.
A big thank you to John for letting me write a guest post to celebrate the release of Legends of Windemere: Warlord of the Forgotten Age. This is it. The final volume of my fantasy adventure series that I’ve worked on for . . . carry the 1 . . . divide by pie . . . 19 years!? Wow, I finally did that actual math on that and caught myself by surprise. Anyway, one of the more common subplots I used in this series is romance. Characters fall in love, have their hearts broken, make mistakes, plan futures, and lock lips. I enjoyed writing these because it felt like rewards and promises to my beleaguered heroes. They also ended up being some of the biggest headaches of my writing career. So, what are some things I learned?
Let’s get the cynicism out of the way. No matter what you do, somebody will hate the pairing, relationship, or existence of romance in the first place. There are many people out there who feel that romance has no place in genres like fantasy and science-fiction. Especially if it’s not the main plot. The thing is that if you want characters to be more human then a relationship is one of the best things to give them. Most people fall in love or get close to others at some point, so it’s one of the easiest points of relation.
You don’t need to write a sex scene to get your point across that characters are in love or lust. Body language like hungry stares and handholding can reveal more than the actual act of procreation. Personally, I see no reason to go beyond the initial kiss and then showing the ‘afterglow’ where the characters are talking, snoring, or raiding the fridge. There’s really no reason for this unless you’re writing erotica or intending to get the reader heated.
There’s only so long that you can play the ‘will they/won’t they’ and ‘who will he/she choose’ game. In Legends of Windemere, I have both situations. One pairing stayed iffy for about 7 volumes because they characters were split up for 2 of them. It was mostly one was open with their feelings and the other was too scared to be honest. The readers knew what was going on, so I had to be careful with how to play it out. Eventually, the audience would think I’m just being a jerk and lose interest in the relationship. When things start to feel stretched and it’s the fourth time they’ve done the ‘so close’ thing then you may have missed your opportunity. As for the love triangle . . .
I don’t know what to tell you here. What I personally learned is that I never want to do one of these again. At least not one that gets this complicated. The problem with a love triangle is that it forces readers to take sides, so you end up creating enemies for the characters involved. People also seem to expect it to be clear from the beginning who will get together. You remove the mystery and risk, so they don’t get invested in a relationship that will fail. I didn’t do that at all. This was a love triangle with an open relationship, three emotionally immature characters, fantasy cultures, and no true hate/malice between those involved. As much as I and others enjoyed this subplot, it was a mess to handle, which is why I brought it to a close earlier than I originally planned.
Love at first sight is a tough card to play, but it’s doable. People talk about how it’s unrealistic and lame. Yet, there’s the chance of two characters having that spark as soon as they met. It can happen with friends, so why not potential lovers? One way I found to make it more palatable is to not go right to the lovey dovey stuff. Such emotions are strong and hit without warning. So, I had one character be overly eager to be honest and another be plain terrified. At least to me, that feels a lot more realistic.
These subplots are perfect targets for villains. Yes, this is a cliché, but what bad guy would pass up the chance to hurt a hero by attacking and possibly destroying their relationship? Many main villains work for psychological victories even if they can’t get the physical one. You stopped my plan to take over this village? Well, the ring you bought from that vendor actually has a memory wipe spell that will go off as soon as your girlfriend puts it on? Villains are cruel and going after loved ones is like stabbing at the heart without actually hitting the heart.
Romantic subplots can change the mentality of a character because they now have something more to live for. With romance comes the possibility of marriage, kids, settling down, and being with someone into old age. Prior to this, a hero might not consider much beyond their final battle or even be okay with dying. Love changes this perspective because it’s something that will last beyond the finale. It’s like a promise to the character that they can have a normal life as long as they survive their adventures.
Again, thank you to John for letting me be a guest and also being there to help support me from early on. It’s been a really long road and it’s great to have people who travel the whole thing with you. Please check out Legends of Windemere: Warlord of the Forgotten Age and I hope you enjoy the adventure.
Charles Yallowitz was born and raised on Long Island, NY, but he has spent most of his life wandering his own imagination in a blissful haze. Occasionally, he would return from this world for the necessities such as food, showers, and Saturday morning cartoons. One day he returned from his imagination and decided he would share his stories with the world. After his wife decided that she was tired of hearing the same stories repeatedly, she convinced him that it would make more sense to follow his dream of being a fantasy author. So, locked within the house under orders to shut up and get to work, Charles brings you Legends of Windemere. He looks forward to sharing all of his stories with you, and his wife is happy he finally has someone else to play with.
Hated and distrusted, Queen Trinity must leave the shadows and reach for redemption.
With their final battle on the horizon, the champions are faced with a long-lost piece of the prophecy. Unable to search for the crests that are rumored to be the key to survival, they must turn to a band of their former enemies for help. Sinister desires and hopes for redemption collide as Queen Trinity of the Chaos Elves leads the hunt and struggles to keep her companions on the path of heroism. Monsters, traps, mysteries, and their own pasts will rise up to stand in the way of these people who have spent their entire lives committing sins. Throughout it all, another old enemy is lurking in the shadows and determined to claim her own delicious prize.
By the end of their journey, those who survive will learn that being a hero is more than simply stepping into the light.
A gurgling causes the two women to pause and look into the pit where the shadows are swirling among the jagged stones. Two black tentacles lance out of the ground and wrap around Yola’s waist, the ooze-dripping projections turning silver at the taste of her magic. Attracted to the stronger energy, the aura syphon yanks the immortal into its slime-covered maw and becomes a metallic beast. With its armored skin, the camouflaged predator is now visible and resembles a sea anemone with the body of a beetle. The jagged rocks are fused to the animal’s exoskeleton and there are six jointed legs that help it scurry out of the pit. Standing over Trinity, the creature opens a faint crease on its body to reveal a bulbous eye with a star-shaped pupil. It pauses to shove a few tentacles into its mouth and hit Yola with pulses of electricity to stop her from struggling. It changes from silver to gold when she attempts to break free, her efforts being quickly drained by the monster.
“Let the crazy woman go before you get killed,” Trinity whispers to the aura syphon. She creates a fireball in the hopes of getting its mouth open, but her spell is ignored. “No reason to have a snack when you have an eternal meal in your belly. Maybe we can have a trade. Can’t believe I’m trying to bargain with this thing. Well, I gave you a chance, so I’m going to blow you up before things get worse. Hope you heard that Yola and are bracing yourself.”
The beast gurgles before releasing a blast of sticky strands that lock Trinity in place. Instead of going after the trapped chaos elf, the creature turns its attention to the helpless army. Having had its fill of magic, the aura syphon is ready to gorge on fresh meat and opens a second mouth that is filled with knife-like teeth. Heading for Sir Harbiss, it is stopped when a chunk of earth erupts beneath it and flips it back into the pit. Unsure of where the attack came from, the aura syphon leaps out and reveals several eye stalks that search for an unseen enemy. A cutting wind lops off half of the projections, but Yola’s potent energy revives them and protects the crystalline armor plates. When the spell comes back around, it bounces off the new defense and bursts against a hill. Blasts of fire strike the beast from behind, so it sprouts a fan-shaped tail of water that douses the flames.
Looking around, the aura syphon stops when it sees that Trinity is nowhere to be seen and there is a hole where she once stood. Spikes grow from the predator’s belly and it slams against the ground in the hopes of impaling the chaos elf. The hiss of escaping gas is heard an instant before an explosion sends the shrieking animal into the sky. Careening towards a solitary cloud that is very low to the ground, the beast catches the scent of an aura that revives the one currently in its gut. Passing through the cloud, it finds its legs caught in a net that runs down to where Trinity is hiding behind a hill. With enhanced strength, the channeler slams the aura syphon into the ground and delivers a leaping stomp to its soft upper body. Instead of ejecting Yola, the creature opens its skin to swallow the chaos elf’s leg up the knee.
“Fine. Backup plan it is,” Trinity mutters, synching her aura to that of the imprisoned immortal.
Releasing as much magic as she can without killing herself, the channeler creates a power surge within the aura syphon. Unable to absorb or redirect so much energy at once, the predator tries to reject the grinning chaos elf. Plunging her fingers into its flesh, Trinity refuses to be thrown off and continues her assault. Blisters appear on the hard exoskeleton and the metallic color flakes off to reveal the natural black of the tentacles. Without warning, the gold returns and the animal explodes with enough force to collapse the ground. Before she can escape, the channeler falls into the pit and is buried beneath the icy dirt.
Need to catch Legends of Windemere from the beginning? Then click on the picture below! First book, ‘Beginning of a Hero’ is free!
Charles Yallowitz was born and raised on Long Island, NY, but he has spent most of his life wandering his own imagination in a blissful haze. Occasionally, he would return from this world for the necessities such as food, showers, and Saturday morning cartoons. One day he returned from his imagination and decided he would share his stories with the world. After his wife decided that she was tired of hearing the same stories repeatedly, she convinced him that it would make more sense to follow his dream of being a fantasy author. So, locked within the house under orders to shut up and get to work, Charles brings you Legends of Windemere. He looks forward to sharing all of his stories with you, and his wife is happy he finally has someone else to play with.
Death is a blessing that the Baron is not ready to bestow upon his new toy.
In the chaos surrounding the Spirit Well, Luke Callindor has disappeared and the only clue the psychic scream of agony that Dariana cannot ignore. Knowing that a journey to Shayd will result in their ultimate battle, the champions have devised another way to rescue their friend. With permission from the gods, Nyx has begun the Ritual of the Lost Lamb. It is a long and exhausting spell, which is made even more difficult by a new threat that is out to make all of the Baron’s enemies suffer.
It is a race against time where every minute lost brings Luke Callindor one step closer to a fate worse than oblivion.
Having said her piece, Nyx gnaws on a hunk of jerky and sips at a waterskin while the others discuss her idea. She refuses to admit that she is having second thoughts about breaking a god seal even with permission. The last time she accomplished such a feat was by accident and resulted in her magic being sealed for days. Nyx shudders at the memory of feeling so many lives ending at her hands and takes a sloppy drink of leathery water to steady her nerves. The result is a full body convulsion of disgust and a hacking cough as the liquid goes down her windpipe. Flicking a green beetle off her shoulder, the channeler impatiently paces in a circle and wonders why the others are taking so long.
The hairs on the back of Nyx’s neck rise and her arms become covered in goosebumps as a pulse of energy ripples through the clearing. She is about to ask her friends if they feel anything, but stops when she sees that they are frozen in time. The half-elf’s heart pounds in her chest as she fears that the Baron is about to attack. More terror seeps into her mind when she expects to turn around and find Luke’s tortured body dangling before her eyes. Not wanting to be caught by surprise, a flaming disc appears in her palm and hums as she searches for the source of the powerful spell. The snap of a twig to her left causes Nyx to hurl the fiery circle, which splits into a swarm of deadly copies that would destroy any normal enemy. Against the ebony platemail of Gabriel, the discs puff into balls of harmless smoke that remain hovering in place.
“Your friends have agreed to your idea,” the Destiny God states, ignoring the mortal’s amusing attack. He removes his black cape, which becomes a vague chair for the nervously bowing channeler. “Now, this is unique. In fact, it is quite unheard of, which is why I am granting you an audience. The Law of Influence says I cannot get involved, but nobody has ever asked for permission to do something like this. Needless to say, all of us are very curious to see how all of this plays out.”
“I want to unseal the Ritual of the Lost Lamb,” Nyx politely requests while she takes a seat on the cape. An enchanting warmth rises from the cloth and she nearly falls asleep from the blissful energy that infects her body. “This is the only way to save Luke without marching into the Baron’s territory. We both know that is what he wants. With the forbidden ritual, I can gather my little brother’s residual energy and bring him home. None of us will be at risk since it’s a combination of a summoning and teleportation spell.”
“Strange that you know about a spell designed by channelers. Especially since it has not been used since the ancient Race War,” Gabriel says with a nod of his head. Urging voices in the back of his head causes the god to hum with his mouth closed, the spell jolting the sources of his rising irritation. “The Ritual of the Lost Lamb was taken from mortals before my time, but I understand the reason it made the gods worry. Such a thing could be the first step into summoning a deity against his or her will. Possibly even stealing immortality. Though I believe times have changed and we should reconsider the sealing.”
“Time is also running out,” the channeler replies, shying away when the powerful deity stares at her. A flickering realization that the Baron’s power might be on the same level of Gabriel gives her the courage to meet the man’s piercing eyes. “I apologize for sounding like I’m rushing you. Yet, it has been said that the gods and goddesses have no concept of time since you exist forever. That means I have to push even though I want to speak with respect.”
“In other words, you want a decision now.”
“That would be best, sir.”
“Sadly, I cannot agree to your terms.”
“I haven’t made any terms.”
“Exactly.”
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Cover art by Jason Pedersen
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Charles Yallowitz was born and raised on Long Island, NY, but he has spent most of his life wandering his own imagination in a blissful haze. Occasionally, he would return from this world for the necessities such as food, showers, and Saturday morning cartoons. One day he returned from his imagination and decided he would share his stories with the world. After his wife decided that she was tired of hearing the same stories repeatedly, she convinced him that it would make more sense to follow his dream of being a fantasy author. So, locked within the house under orders to shut up and get to work, Charles brings you Legends of Windemere. He looks forward to sharing all of his stories with you, and his wife is happy he finally has someone else to play with.
John says “This is Crazy!!! SIX Books for 2/3’s the Price of a Latte at Starbucks?” Charles says, “Mind Your Own Business, John. I’m Doing It!”
From December 22nd at Noon EST to December 26th (8 AM PST) you can get the first 6 volumes of
LEGENDS OF WINDEMERE
for $2!
Cover Art by Jason Pedersen 3D Conversion by Bestt_graphics
*This Book Bundle contains the first 3 volumes of the LEGENDS OF WINDEMERE fantasy series.*
Every hero must take that first courageous step into adventure. For Luke Callindor, it’s more of a blind stumble. From battling a demonic assassin to facing the family he left behind, this warrior’s adventuring career has been one awkward mistake after another. Most days the only things that keep him alive, yet never unharmed, are his trusted friends and his reckless courage. How long can his luck hold out before the gods of Windemere decide to cut his legend short?
*This Book Bundle contains volumes 4-6 of the LEGENDS OF WINDEMERE fantasy series.*
The destiny of Nyx, Sari, and Luke Callindor has been revealed, but that does not make their lives any easier. With old enemies still on the hunt, a new threat is stepping out of the shadows to indulge his sadistic desires. From battling the magic-devouring Krypters in Hero’s Gate to facing a demonic curse that has befallen one of our heroes, the champions will be pushed to their limits and beyond. Can the arrival of two more destined warriors improve their chances or will it bring them one step closer to failing like their predecessors?
Born from the light and darkness, Dariana can no longer avoid her fate.
The final corrupted temple stands between the champions and Baron Kernaghan having their great battle. Only one problem: the Compass Key refuses to work with Dariana, who long ago wiped all memories of the Spirit Well from her mind. Now, they are forced to follow a trail of clues that Dariana’s former self left behind centuries ago. It is a path that will lead the champions into a part of their friend’s past that could tear them all apart.
Will the bonds of friendship be stronger than the call of blood?
“I’m sorry, but I told you that my powers make the Compass Key argumentative when it comes to the Spirit Well,” Dariana sheepishly explains while rubbing her clear ring. She smiles when Fizzle lands on her head, the drite’s cool tail running down her spine. “This is very scary for me. None of the champions have made it to this temple, much less the final battle with my father. It’s hard to take in after this destiny being my entire life for so long. I used to always dream of how I would handle my temple, but things are different now that it’s no longer a distant dream. What if I make a mistake and get someone killed?”
“We trust you, my friend, and know that you will not fail,” Timoran whispers as he slides the Compass Key across the table. He is confused when the relic sparks at her touch and gets pushed back into his hand. “That is fairly disheartening. If you cannot use the Compass Key then there is no way to find this Spirit Well. Perhaps it does not like your physical touch and will respond to your telepathy. I wonder why the gods would create this obstacle.”
“It’s possible that we did this,” Delvin suggests while using one of his enchanted rings to create a delicious cup of coffee. He gestures for the barbarian to throw the relic over to him, but the red-haired barbarian refuses. “You’re right, Timoran. Probably not a good idea to toss something like that around. Anyway, we had the Compass Key warded against agents of the Baron. They aren’t able to see it, which means they can’t find or use it. The decision made sense at the time, but things are different now. Maybe our spell has a small effect on Dariana. Not saying you’re working with the Baron, but there could be enough of an aural touch to cause this problem. Do you think we should cancel the spells, Nyx?”
The channeler heats up a cup of tea, which she sips at while considering the possibility of her magic being the issue. “They should stay because I don’t think they’re the problem. Dariana said this has happened before, which means the gods made a mistake. Sorry for how that came out. Gabriel, who better not get angry at this conversation, created the Compass Key first and then turned Dariana into a champion. He couldn’t fix the problem thanks to the Law of Influence, so it’s remained all this time. Though he had to have created something to help us move on.”
“Maybe we have to find Isaiah and he’ll lead the way,” Sari says from the couch. Flipping to her feet, she joins her friends and immediately takes a strawberry off Luke’s plate. “He hasn’t been much help since the first temple, so one has to wonder what his purpose is. I doubt we need his protection any more, which means he has to have another role to play. What do you think, Dari?”
The telepath rubs her temples while scanning the city for a sign of the fireskin, part of her praying he is not nearby. Dariana finds evidence that Isaiah has been spying on them until recently, but the caster is long gone. She considers tracking the faint trail and goes as far as the outer wall, which is where the psychic tracks make an odd leap into the sky. The strain of following Isaiah any further makes Dariana pull back and return to find that everyone is staring at her again. Realizing that she can no longer delay the inevitable, she gets out of her chair and kneels to her friends. Fizzle is still clinging to her head, which makes the apologetic bow both amusing and awkward.
“I know I say this a lot, but I really am sorry, my friends,” Dariana states while keeping her forehead pressed to the stone floor. She looks up at the sound of rustling feet and is surprised to see that everyone is approaching her. “Long ago, I managed to avoid being put back to sleep long enough to track down the Spirit Well. My curiosity got the best of me and I wanted to know where my path would meet its end. I was still forced to wipe my memory of the location, but I do know that I left a map behind. There are a few clues that I buried in my subconscious where even I could not dislodge them after erasing the original discovery. More may come to me as we get closer, but all I know now is that we should go to Rodillen. I was hoping the Compass Key would work and we could avoid this extra journey.”
“Like our luck would be that good,” Nyx mutters while she helps Dariana stand.
Need to catch Legends of Windemere from the beginning? Then click on the covers below!
Charles Yallowitz was born and raised on Long Island, NY, but he has spent most of his life wandering his own imagination in a blissful haze. Occasionally, he would return from this world for the necessities such as food, showers, and Saturday morning cartoons. One day he returned from his imagination and decided he would share his stories with the world. After his wife decided that she was tired of hearing the same stories repeatedly, she convinced him that it would make more sense to follow his dream of being a fantasy author. So, locked within the house under orders to shut up and get to work, Charles brings you Legends of Windemere. He looks forward to sharing all of his stories with you, and his wife is happy he finally has someone else to play with.
Normally I post my Top Ten Things during this time. Today I am so pleased to have a guest “Top Tenster.” Charles has put together a laugh out loud list for you today. Charles is a gifted author, and his Amazon Author page will give more detail on his books. If you are unfamiliar with Charles Yallowitz and his fantasy series Legends of Windemere (I think maybe you have been in solitary confinement for the last three years), then I hope you will have the incentive to check out his first book. After all, the price is right and here is the cover.
So Charles, welcome, and the post is yours.
Thank you to John for letting me attempt a Top 10 list. Recently, I made the first book of my series, Legends of Windemere: Beginning of a Hero, permanently free. A tough choice to make after it being 99 cents for three years. Though there are worse ideas and here are ten book promotion methods that I wouldn’t recommend:
Do not offer free flu shots with every purchase of your book. You are not a trained physician, and I don’t think your friend Scruffy is a pharmacologist. He may own a white lab coat and know how to spell ‘influenza’, but I’m pretty sure his degree is in Sandwich Artistry. Also, you’d lose money on traveling to all of your readers.
Do not promote your book by skywriting an excerpt. Yes, it’s a unique idea that’s never been done. Though the reason is because you would run out of smoke before you get through the first paragraph. Not to mention the beginning will fade long before you get to the end. Does that say ‘dork and scurry right’?
Do not brand your readers with a booby-trapped book. It doesn’t matter if it puts the Amazon URL on their forehead. Seriously, you need to be kept away from all of mankind until you get professional help.
Do not tie a promotional kite to yourself and streak through a major sporting event. The cameras will all be on you getting tackled in your pixelated glory. Your precious kite will end up in a tree or trampled by the entire NY Giants defensive line and part of the Philadelphia Eagles offensive line.
Do not try to get a celebrity endorsement by harassing them on social media and begging for permission to put them in your book. More than likely, you’ll make a public spectacle of yourself and get no reaction. Though there’s always the chance that they’ll respond with a restraining order.
Do not make and maintain a Twitter account for every single character in your book. It might sound like a good idea for the main character, but nobody cares what Marcel the Blacksmith is doing after being mentioned in one sentence. Not to mention you’ll never leave Twitter to write your book and give Marcel a second sentence.
Do not hold a raffle for your firstborn child and enter every reader into it. For one thing, it’s rude, and not everybody wants a child. More importantly, your spouse and their new friend in a white coat might have issues with this. Let’s not forget that it’s illegal too.
Do not print out multiple cover slips for your book, go to the local bookstore, and put them on all of the bestsellers. For one thing, you never put a barcode on your creations and the cashier can simply write it up with a discount for damages. There’s also that security guard approaching to ask why your clothes are stuffed with cover clips. Enjoy the collection of paper cuts in uncomfortable places.
Do not promise to include a copy of your sex tape with every purchase. There are many reasons why this is a bad idea. The biggest one is that it will result in your spouse saying, “What sex tape?”.
Do not run for President of the United States to get attention as an author. Seriously, you could win and be put in charge of the red button. We both know how that will end, and cockroaches only read graphic novels.
Charles Yallowitz was born and raised on Long Island, NY, but he has spent most of his life wandering his own imagination in a blissful haze. Occasionally, he would return from this world for the necessities such as food, showers, and Saturday morning cartoons. One day he returned from his imagination and decided he would share his stories with the world. After his wife decided that she was tired of hearing the same stories repeatedly, she convinced him that it would make more sense to follow his dream of being a fantasy author. So, locked within the house under orders to shut up and get to work, Charles brings you Legends of Windemere. He looks forward to sharing all of his stories with you, and his wife is happy he finally has someone else to play with.
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