Tag: fiction favorites

Tuesday – A Little Personal – Kreative Kue #226 by Keith Channing

~ John W. Howell ~ 53 Comments

In Keith’s words, “Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next Monday.”

The photo

Top ten Things Not to Do at the Start of a New American Football Season

~ John W. Howell ~ 53 Comments

 

Top Ten things not to do

Yes, it’s true. We are beginning the pre-game season. I thought I would put together a list that will hopefully lead to a more enjoyable season for all. (Notice I labeled it American football in deference to the name the rest of the world calls soccer)

Top Ten Things Not to Do at the Start of a New American Football Season

10 At the start of the football season, do not try to change entertainment providers. If you do, at best you’ll have a sports bar close. At worse, you will be hanging aluminum foil off a shirt hanger trying to pick up tonight’s game. (We all know that no matter how you hate your current provider, Isa the new one won’t work for at least 30 days.)

9 At the start of the football season, do not try to hire Tiny the WWF champ to do your yard work so you can watch the game. If you do, at best he’ll come on Tuesdays. At worse, he will show up on Saturday and will have his broad nose pressed against your window to see the game. (By the way, Islam Tiny just left his separation anxiety group therapy session, and this is no time to tell him t get lost.)

8 At the start of the football season, do not try some tricky recipes for game day. If you do, at best there still is Pizza hut. At worst, you will know your goose liver pate is being seen as meatloaf when someone asks for catsup. (You should have never tried, Istvan. Your friends would have sooner had meatloaf.)

7 At the start of the football season, do not vow to beat the Jones’ with an elaborate tailgate scheme. If you do, at best the Jones’ won’t show up. At worst, Jones has hired an eighteen-wheeler. (To make matters even worse, Ivey the thing is fully furnished including a hot tub, kitchen and a Garth Brooks live performance.)

6 At the start of the football season, do not join the One Hundred dollar squares game at work. If you do, at best you will only have spent $100.00. At worst, you didn’t read the fine print and you are expected to anti $100.00 a week. (Don’t worry, Ixon. That guy with the big nose and muscles isn’t all that bad once you pay up. He may even buy you a beer.)

5 At the start of the football season, do not insist on wearing your team jersey to work on Friday. If you do, at best, your team is very popular with your fellow workers. At worse, your team is playing your bosses’ alma mater this week. (The boss does not look amused, Izod. I think you had better explain that you lost a bet and your team is really the bosses’ team. The boss is not going to buy it, but at least you have plausible deniability, especially if the bosses’ team loses.)

4 At the start of the football season, do not quote every single statistic about every single player during lunch. If you do, at best everyone will be engaged in other discussions. At worse, sooner or later someone will ask you if you would like a big cup of shut the f–k up. (Now you know you need to be quiet, James. Otherwise, you will know what it is like to eat your lunch all by yourself.)

3 At the start of the football season, do not go shopping for a giant screen TV. If you do, At best your store will be running a sale. At worst, since they know you and everyone else wants a big screen badly, your store will add 10% to the already outrageous price. (You should have made this purchase during the Fourth of July sale, Joshua. No one wanted a TV then.)

2 At the start of the football season, do not try the old mancave in the garage bit. If you do, at best, your spouse will nix the idea immediately. At worst, you’ll get the mancave set up only to be forced to make room for the cars. (You didn’t think this one out, Jonathan. You see the snow and ice on top of the vehicles is not suitable for them or you when it comes time to try and unfreeze the doors to go to work.)

1 At the start of the football season, do not try to exert dominance over the remote. If you do, at best others in the house want to watch the same games as you. At worst, no one has any interest in the games you want to watch. (So there you are on the back patio, Jason. Yeah, that’s your breath, you see. I hope you are enjoying watching the game in the same weather conditions in which it is being played. Another hot toddy may help.)

Circumstances of Childhood Review by Maryann Miller

~ John W. Howell ~ 16 Comments

Maryann Miller has given Circumstances of Childhood a terrific review at her place. Here is the link to the review and her blog which is titled Maryann Writes.

https://maryannwrites.com/2019/08/25/book-review-circumstances-of-childhood-by-john-w-howell/

Maryann Miller is one of those talented authors who makes time to help other authors. She has a regular feature on her blog where she provides a review of a book on Sunday and then invites the author to be her guest for a post on Wednesday.

Here is Maryann describing the process.

“Feel free to scout around the site and read my BLOG and find information about all my BOOKS, as well as my EDITORIAL SERVICES.

I like to support my fellow authors on my blog with reviews and guest posts. Those reviews cover fiction and nonfiction, and authors can find details by clicking the “services” tab.

If you would like to contact me for a review or editing, or just to say “hello” you can do so at maryann@maryannwrites.com. I do like to chat with readers and other authors about all aspects of books and writing.”

Visit Maryann and read the excellent review. You may want to have her do the same for you.

Thank you so much, Maryann, for taking the time to read and review Circumstances of Childhood. I look forward to visiting you on Wednesday.

Views of the Neighborhood – Community Spirit – A Repost on the Second Anniversary of Hurricane Harvey.

~ John W. Howell ~ 49 Comments

Since this is the second anniversary of Hurricane Harvey which devastated Port Aransas, I thought I would repeat a post that ran after the hurricane showing the community spirit there. I think it is that spirit which helped many people through difficult times. We no longer live in Port Aransas but the experience of the hurricane is still with us. The post follows this photo of the Texas flag flying over the marina taken days after the Hurricane.

Texas Flag

Here is the post.

Continuing with my thoughts on maintaining a positive focus regarding Hurricane Harvey, I am featuring three separate groups who have set up relief points in town. All the goods in these relief locations are donations from kind folks outside of Port Aransas. These contributions have made a difference in helping folks through a very tough time.

Community spirit

Our first stop is the Recovery Supply Depot at Robert’s Point Park.

Here residents can find almost anything in cleaning supplies, hardware, and food. Bear in mind the local grocery store just opened this week with a very limited supply.

This shot will give you an idea of the magnitude of the donations. There are even wheelchairs available.

I loved this shot since it shows bikes, shovels, and rakes.

When I took this picture, a guy off camera asked, “Do you have any tarps?” The answer was, “Sure do. What size?”

Port Aransas spirit

The next relief point is Cowboy Camp David. A place run by volunteers offering free food, water, and hugs. The words across the Texas image on the right of the sign read “Texas Strong.”

Water is very important and is available here.

The volunteers are setting up for lunch.

The local churches were hard hit, so Camp David is the point to gather for worship.

Cooking under a pop-up.

Two things every Texan loves. Bar-b-que and the Texas flag.

This relief point is the Harvey Help Center and is located in the ruins of the Laughing Horse Motel.  There are bins of cleaning supplies, food, and clothes. (The Fritos looked especially good)

Here is a shot of the women who run this relief spot. I was impressed by their enthusiasm and desire to help those in need.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – Preposition

~ John W. Howell ~ 59 Comments

Stream of Consciousness

 

With the advent of Saturday, we can guess that this is Stream of Consciousness Saturday on this blog. This weeks prompt is the preposition. Linda Hill says we can get bonus points for beginning and ending our post with a preposition. So you see why the beginning of my post looks unusual (nailed it). If you would like to wander in the excitement of a weekly prompt, go to Linda’s blog and read how easy it is to do just that there. Here is the link.

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS August 24/19

The Preposition by John W. Howell © 2019

“Under what rule are you working?”

“That is an odd way to ask that question.”

“Yeah, I was trying to start our conversation with a preposition.”

“Don’t tell me. Linda Hill?”

“You know how it is. I am possessed.”

“That may be too strong a word. Let’s just say, obsessed.”

“Whatever. I’m compelled to do these prompts and don’t know why.”

“Maybe the devil makes you do them.”

“I don’t think so. I think it is a matter of wanting to let my imagination run free.”

“Oh, sure. That explains it entirely. Sitting in the house on a beautiful day, wracking your brain on a prompt is freedom.”

“You are not making me feel better.”

“To make you feel better might be a bigger task than I want to tackle.”

“That’s cold but then again maybe you can help me out?”

“Which way did you come in?”

“Very funny.”

“You are not supposed to end a sentence with a preposition. You ended yours with “out.”‘

“So did you.”

“Huh?”

“Anyway. I’m supposed to end this with a preposition.”

“What? And break the cardinal rule of grammar?”

“Who appointed you the grammar boss?”

“Just trying to be helpful.”

“Okay, so I was going to end this with, ‘So where does this leave us at?'”

“Again, we in the serious, legitimate literary world don’t end our sentences with a preposition.”

“Okay. Let me rephrase my question. ‘So where does this leave us at, butthead?”

“That’s what I’m talking about.”

Friday JohnKu – AKA – TGIF

~ John W. Howell ~ 73 Comments

 

Lucy and Twiggy
“Let’s play tag, Lucy.”
“Okay, I’ll give you to the count of three.”
“Can I get five?”

It is Friday again. This week has been more of the old heatwave. It has been 103 degrees for the last nine days. That kind of heat wears one out. We are expecting at least another two weeks of above 100 degrees. We can complain as much as we want, but it won’t help.

I spent another week on my WIP. Again I averaged above 1000 words a day and am currently at over 54,000.

Today’s JohnKu talks about the weather which is everyone’s favorite subject.

The Weather by John W. Howell © 2019

It’s one of those things,

We all talk about daily . . .

And never change it.

 

I hope you all have a great weekend.

Thursday – A Little personal – Lucy and Twiggy show signs of Cabin Fever

~ John W. Howell ~ 76 Comments

“So dad, we want to play outside.”

“It is too hot right now, Little One. It’s 103 degrees. Go play with Lucy.”

“Gee, Boss. I thought outside was a good idea.”

“See Dad. Lucy agrees with me.”

“Go look out and tell me what you see.”

“I don’t see anything. How about you, Lucy?”

“Nope, nothing from down here.”

“I’m still looking. Aw Lucy. You abandoned your post.”

“Yeah, sorry Little One but these old bones gotta rest.”

“I can tell you there is nothing out there because it is too darned hot.”

“Okay. I get it. I think I’ll play with the hedgehog.”

“You want to play keep away? Twiggy?

“What do I have to do?”

“You run away, and I keep Hedgehog. away from you.”

“What are you doing, Twiggy?”

“The lioness on the plain advancing on the slow unsuspecting Water Buffalo.”

“Then the water Buffalo gores the lion with her horns.”

“Hey no fair. I’m the queen of the jungle. I don’t do gored.”

“But the lion is too smart for the Buffalo and gets the drop.”

“You’re supposed to be gored.”

“Where is that written? You missed.”

“Boss. Twiggy doesn’t play fair. She is supposed to be gored.”

“I know, Lucy. Maybe next time you can be the lion.”

Wednesday Story Day – AKA – Hump Day

~ John W. Howell ~ 43 Comments
Lucy
“What are you doing, Lucy?”
“Just checking. I think I see Friday headed this way.”

 

It is Wednesday Story Day again, and last week we had a round of doubt with Christine. Andrew was all in favor of heading back to Boston, but Larry talked him into going for justice for Alexis’ murder. Andrew wasn’t anxious to stay and drink with Christine. In fact, he thinks Christine’s days are numbered. Larry and Andrew head over to the Judge’s house. We need to get there and see how this scene is going to play out.

 

“Go ahead, Andrew ring the bell.”

“It’s after eight. Don’t you think it is a bit late to be calling on the judge?”

“I’m sure he’s expecting us. Ring the bell.”

“There, done. Man, does that thing intend to play the whole Westminster chime?”

“Someone is at the door. Let me do the talking, Andrew.”

“Can I help you, gentlemen?”

“Hello, we are from the Boston police department, and we believe the judge is expecting us.”

“Oh, yes, he is. Please come in.”

“Thank you.”

“If you gentlemen will follow me I’ll put you in the judge’s office and let him know you are here. Here we are. Make yourselves comfortable. The Judge will be right in.”

“Thank you, uh.”

“Oh, pardon my manners. My name is Thelma. I’m Judge Trimble’s wife.”

“Nice to meet you, Thelma. My name’s Larry, and this is Andrew, my associate.  We are sorry to disturb your evening.”

“Oh, not at all. This is commonplace in a judge’s life. He’ll be right in.”

“Judges’ wife Thelma huh?”

“Hush, Andrew. Remember where we are.”

“Gentlemen. It is always nice to meet those whose duty it is to bring criminals to justice.”

“Yes, sir, your honor. This is Andrew Cummings, and My name is Larry Dunfee.”

“Very nice meeting you. Now how can I help you this fine evening?”

“We need to take a look at the guest records of the Hyatt hotel.”

“And for what purpose?”

“We are trying to establish the whereabouts of one Janice Rafferty on the night her husband was murdered. She tells us she was in Boston, but there is some hearsay that she was actually staying at the Hyatt.”

“Hearsay? Any eyewitness?”

“No, that is why we need the warrant.”

“If you do determine she was at the Hyatt then what?”

“Then we believe she is guilty of obstructing justice for lying to us, and we will arrest her.”

“So that is the only charge, obstructing justice?”

“Well, we also believe she knows more than she is letting on about the death of her husband. The obstruction charge will allow us to further investigate her alibi for the evening based on the new facts. She may be in line for a murder charge or at least a conspiracy to commit murder.”

“Why isn’t local law enforcement involved?”

“We have reason to believe the locals don’t want to pursue the case because the man murdered was an employee of the Cortez cartel. His death has already been ruled an accident, but we believe otherwise.”

“Alright, I’ve heard enough. I will issue the warrant for the hotel records of the named person. You say the name is Janice Rafferty?”

“I think we will need to look at Alexis Rafferty as well. I don’t think she would sign in under her name.”

“Larry what about Ned Dixon?”

“Good point. Your honor if we could also see if Ned Dixon was in the hotel, it would be helpful.”

“Who is Ned Dixon?”

“Her paramour.”

“I’m sorry Mr.Dunfee but now you are running far afield of my comfort zone here.”

“Yes, sir. Just the Rafferty’s then sir.”

“I will need you to sign this affidavit as to the nature of the crime and the fact that you believe Janice Rafferty did it. Also, I need to see your official ID.”

“Yes, sir. Here it is. Do I sign here?”

“Yes, right on that line. Okay, here you are. The warrant is good for twenty-four hours. Good luck.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“And gentlemen.”

“Yes, sir?”

“You are running around, stepping on some pretty big toes. I would be careful if I were you.”

“Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.”

“Mrs. Trimble will show you out.”

“Nice meeting you, sir.”

“Yes, Mr. Dunfee. A pleasure. Goodbye, Sir

 

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #225 by Keith Channing

~ John W. Howell ~ 71 Comments

In Keith’s words.

“Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next Monday.”

The photo.

Kreative Kue #225

Problem Solved by John W. Howell © 2019

“Hold on Sedgwick. Who appointed you a chief mechanic?”

“Well, I’m not saying I’m chief, but I know a hell of a lot more than you.”

“Oh, sure. Says the guy who forgot the locking bolts on the baggage hold hatch.”

“I didn’t forget them. They were just not deployed is all.”

“So you did that on purpose?”

“Not on purpose. It was an honest mistake.”

“Made by an incompetent.”

“Now you two need to stop. We must get this flight ready to depart. What seems to be the problem?”

“Mr. know it all here says this piece of baggage can’t be put on the plane.”

“Sedgewick is that true?”

“There’s no room. The plane is full and so it the baggage compartment.”

“So why not take it into the terminal and we’ll send it on the next flight?”

“The problem that Sedgewick refuses to recognize or discuss is that bag has all the emergency oxygen masks in it. and need to be on the plane.”

“Do tell. How is that possible?”

“Sedgewick removed them.”

“True Sedgewick?”

“Yes, ma’am it was time for their annual inspection, so I took them out.”

“Now, there is no time to put them back. Is that it?”

“That is it in a nutshell, ma’am.”

“Well, I think there is an easy solution.”

“Sedgewick and I would like to hear it, ma’am.”

“We’ll tell the pilot to stay below 10,000 feet, and there will be no need for the masks should an emergency occur.”

“He can do that?”

“Of course. The only problem will be when he approaches the Alps.”

“How tall are they, ma’am?”

“Fifteen thousand or so.”

“Can the folks hold their breath till they get over them?”

“You know Sedgewick. I thought you didn’t know much, but that is a perfect solution. Are we good here?”

“All good, ma’am.”

 

Ten Things Not to Do at the Opening of the Wizard of Oz in 1938

~ John W. Howell ~ 63 Comments

 

Wizard of Oz

This week marks the anniversary of the opening of the movie The Wizard of Oz in New York City in 1938. Since we all want to attend that gala event, we need to take our Top Ten Things Not to Do list so that we can enjoy the evening and not create an incident or tear in the time continuum. All set? Let’s go.

Top Ten Things Not to Do at the Opening of the Wizard of Oz in 1938.

10 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not think anyone will appreciate your cosplay attempt with the lion costume. If you do, at best no one will take your photo. At worst, since cosplay is a thing of recent history, the zoo will be called, and you’ll be netted. (This is a fine kettle of fish you’ve gotten yourself into Iapetus. At least there’s plenty of red meat served. I would keep an eye on that big fella over there. I think he likes you.)

9 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not let Tiny the WWF champ see you cut in line. If you do, at best you can make friends with the person you cut in front of quickly. At worst, Tiny, who was just warned about the evils of line cutting by his boss, has decided to make an example of you. (Stop screaming, Idris. Tiny will eventually stop twirling and slam you to the pavement. Then it will be time to scream.)

8 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not make any comment about the Munchkins. If you do, at best they’ll be too busy to hear you. At worst, your comment regarding size challenge will not go unrevenged. (How does it feel being carried aloft by one hundred hands, Ignat. I hope you enjoy the ride cause the next stop is the Hudson River.)

7 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not sing along with Dorthy on the song Over the Rainbow. If you do, at best the music will be loud enough to drown you out. At worst, the theater management will finally find you. (They thought you had brought your cat to the performance, Iliya. Looks like you better say a quick goodbye to your seatmates.)

6 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not think it amusing to arrive on a pink horse. If you do, at best traffic will be so bad you’ll never get to the front door. At worst, you’ll come face to face with the militant leader of the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. (The leader makes the Wicked Witch of the West appear to be a girl scout, Imad. That umbrella feels like a billy club, doesn’t it? Best to ride out of town.)

5 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not ask the concession person for a copy of the DVD. If you do, at best you’ll get a box of raisinets instead. At worst, the concession person thinking you mean to hold up the stand will whistle for the police. (Now you have the pleasure of explaining what a DVD is, Imanol. Maybe it’s better to say you meant raisinets after all.)

4 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not ask to try on the ruby slippers. If you do, at best Judy Garland will say no. At worst, you’ll get them on. (Now what are you going to do, Indra? You have size fives on your nines and no way to get them off. You’re lucky there is not a real witch Glenda. She would send you back to Kansas.)

3 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not ask the Winged Monkey King for an autograph. If you do, at best he won’t have a pen. At worst he might decide to take you back to the tower to share a lunch. (Don’t look now, Iolo but the term, “share,” has a different meaning to the Flying Monkeys)

2 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not ask auntie Em for a cookie. If you do, at best she won’t hear you. At worst, you will be the one-millionth person to make that request. (So auntie decided to give you something for your effort huh, Ionakana? Here take this steak and put it on that eye. The swelling will go down in no time.)

1 At the opening of the Wizard of Oz, do not shout out, “Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.” If you do, at best no one will know what you are talking about. At worse, when that part comes in the movie, and the audience realizes you shouted a spoiler. (Time to leave your seat, Iowereth. There are about 300 movie goers who want a piece of you. Guess what? There aren’t that many pieces to go around.)