Today I randomly opened Circumstances of Childhood to Page 159. With eyes closed, I pointed to the page. The word closest to my finger is “meetings.” That is our prompt.
This post was initially run on March 10, 2014, co-authored by Marie Ann Bailey and me. Since there are still negative reviews out there, maybe it might be helpful.
Top Ten Things Not to Do If Your Book Gets a Negative Review
10. If your book gets a negative review, do not read the review, especially if the rating is one star. At best, the reviewer will admit the review is based on having read only a couple of pages of your book, and you can chide yourself for even bothering to read one word of it. At worst, you will read the review so many times you can quote it by heart, begin to believe it, and eventually get one star tattooed on your back to atone for imagined errors in your career choice.
9. If your book gets a negative review, do not respond to the review in any way. If you do, at best, the reviewer will ignore your comments and let others decide if you just have a case of sour grapes. At worst, the reviewer will take great delight in responding to your comments, goading you into an outraged frenzy, whereupon the website will block you from seeing any more reviews.
8. If your book gets a negative review, do not search for and then comment on other books that the reviewer has reviewed. Even if you have read those books, at best, you will be taking precious time away from your writing just to get even with the reviewer. At worst, the reviewer will realize it is you and seek a court injunction on the grounds that you are unstable, as evidenced by your spending so much more time reviewing other books rather than writing one.
7. If your book gets a negative review, do not ask your family or friends to target the reviewer with their own commentaries. If you do, at best, the reviewer will just ignore them, and eventually they will lose interest. At worst, they will all end up in an unsightly battle of words, and then they will all get banned from the website, and your family and friends will turn on you like a wounded Leopard.
6. If your book gets a negative review, do not assume a false identity and write reviews of your book to counter the negative review. If you do, at best, no one will know it’s you, and eventually, you will just feel as if you are a loser. (You think?). At worst, someone will uncover your identity and both you and your book will be pulled from the websites, leaving your readers to believe you’ve been arrested or kidnapped.
5. If your book gets a negative review, do not start a campaign against negative reviews, using the negative review as an example. At best, the campaign will quickly fizzle out as so many do without the reviewer ever knowing about it. At worst, the reviewer will see your campaign and accuse you of libel, slapping you with a lawsuit so expensive that you will be doomed to write PR copy for the Russians full-time for the rest of your life in order to pay it off.
4. If your book gets a negative review, do not think that you should suddenly switch genres just because one reviewer doesn’t “get” your book. If you do, at best, you might discover writing erotica causes you to take too many breaks during the day, so you can try out scenes with your significant other, and so your productivity suffers. At worst, you might discover that while you may now enjoy writing erotica, you can’t get your children’s literature agent or any publisher’s interest in your new book.
3. If your book gets a negative review, do not take the reviewer’s advice to quit writing and take up dishwashing as an occupation. At best, the long hours at the sink will only cause your imagination to go into high gear, and you’ll be back to writing within a few days. At worst, your brain will turn to mush from the dull drudgery, and by the time you can retire from said occupation, you will have forgotten how you got stuck as a dishwasher in the first place.
2. If your book gets a negative review, do not think one bad review trumps all your positive reviews. If you do, at best, your faithful readers will not mind that you’ve suddenly changed narrative styles because you are talented in any style you choose. At worst, you will find yourself writing solely for the reviewer who doesn’t care about you or your books, and your readers will have to stage an intervention to prevent you from reading any more negative reviews.
1. If your book gets a negative review, do not stop writing. If you do, at best, you will suddenly have more time on your hands than you know what to do with. At worst, you will disappoint your readers and they will accuse you of emulating J.D. Salinger, which, of course, you cannot afford to do until you actually become J. D. Salinger.
Today we are going to visit a ceremony in Lakeway for the remembrance of the day 80 years ago when the Japanese surrendered to end World War II. We will be going to Heritage Park and will be catered by Jeffreys of Austin. Our entertainment will be Lee Greenwood.
Menu
Tournedos de veau & escargot – veal tenderloin in bacon, escargot, butterwhite bean, confit tomato, peppered ham jus
Gulf snapper en papillote – lemongrass carrot broth, baby turnips, king trumpet mushrooms & thai basil
Pekin Duck breast “au Poivre” – roasted rapini, le puy lentils, bronze fennel, caramelized figs & banyuls vinegar
Braised beef short rib – crushed English peas, caramelized shallot vadouvan curry & preserved garlic
Grilled meats
Dean & Peeler Floresville, Texas, USDA Prime, all-natural Black Angus beef
8 oz tenderloin fileT, 16 oz ribeye
Mishima Reserve Northwest, reserve ultra, all-natural Wagyu beef
6 oz tenderloin filet, 12 oz New York strip, 16 oz ribeye
Niman Ranch Midwest, USDA Prime, all-natural Black Angus beef 24 oz bone-in strip, dry aged 32 days
26 oz bone-in ribeye, dry aged 32 days, 42 oz porterhouse, dry aged 32 days
Wood Roasted Chops
16 oz Colorado rack of lamb, served with mint jelly
16 oz tomahawk pork chop, served with truffle butter
Let’s get going.
We are here at the Heritage Center.
Welcome remarks by Patrick D. Hall, Rear Admiral USN (retired).
The invocation by Pastor Scott Rogers.
The Star Spangled Banner by the Wildflowers.
Moving remarks by Tom Kilgore, Mayor of Lakeway. The Spirit of Freedom monument behind the mayor has over 500 names of those from Lakeway who served during World War II.
Presentation of the memorial wreaths by Admiral Hall and Nancy Jo Forage.
A beautiful rendition of Taps played by Emily Muckelroy of Lake Travis High School.
God Bless America by the Wildflowers.
The Benediction by Pastor Scott Rodgers.
We are all reminded not to forget the men and women of the greatest generation who answered the call for freedom.
Now it is time to enjoy that freedom with music and food. I hope you have an easy week.
The coffee machine flashes a sign on the touch pad. “Clean me or go to a hotel for coffee.” Punching the “clean” button was the better alternative. Yes, the wait was 20 minutes, but it was well worth it. Holding a fresh hot cup of coffee with its curative vapors was my reward. A careful hoist of the cup and one sip plugged the hole that metaphorically appeared in my skull. No sooner done than someone brought home the stupidity of a doorbell. The Westminster chimes triggered the protective instincts of Twiggy and Tempeste. Their defense systems engaged at full volume and pitch, which potentially could make ears bleed.
A toss of a handful of kibble into the soundproof room, followed by the slamming of the door, brought a sweet peace from the hounds back to the valley. Checking the security monitor for the infidel stupid enough to ignore the “Do not ring the doorbell” sign, a horrific sight met my eyes. It was none other than the Tasmanian Devil holding a letter and drooling on my front porch. No need to go through the hoops of asking him to drop it there, since from experience, Tasmanian Devils are short on conversation.
With a sigh, I begin the security shutdown process. The SWAT team needs to be put on standby. A quick text to the leader confirms that status. Also, the flight of A-10 Warthogs must be diverted. Another call to the commander puts that worry to rest. The SEAL team needs to be called off, and a call to the leader makes that possible. A call to the tow truck driver stops the deployment of an M1A1 Abrams Tank. The control panel simplifies the shutdown process of the security system. The boiling oil vats are put on standby, the turret mortars disengaged, the Trebuchet on safety, the concertina wire rolled, the Claymore mines reset, the tower Gatling guns on safety, the moat net dropped, the alligators fed, and the IEDs and shoulder-held rockets put away. The Proton torpedoes switched off. The gamma ray beams covered. The high-powered maser guns switched to standby, and the nanorobots were chained in the basement. The locks on the door are thrown. And the door opened.
The devil begins to spin, and my weak “Howdy” goes unanswered. The letter flies from his hand and falls to my feet. From inside the tornado comes a spinning paw. No doubt an attempt to hound me for a tip. Scooping up the letter, I shout: “A soft answer turns away wrath…mine is No!” and slam the front door. It is a good thing the door is made of steel, since it sounds like the Devil hopes to tear it down.
The letter contains a message from Linda Hill. It reads: Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “starts with ‘ho.’” Find a word that begins with the letters “ho” and use it any way you’d like. Have fun!
A man recently received word through social media that a Long Islander and his metal detector had found his missing class ring, lost on a day at the beach 56 years ago.
Then, Alfred DiStefano remembers vaguely standing on a dock or a pier on Cedar Beach, Long Island Sound, when the ring slipped off and fell into the water.
Receiving it through the mail, the now Dr. Alfred DiStefano was able to look at the highly personalized white gold band and ruby for the first time since gasoline cost $0.35 a gallon.
The story begins when hobbyist David Orlowski was on the beach at low tide with his metal detector. Routinely scanning the beaches of Long Island for years, he’s found many rings in his time.
“They go in the water, shrinks your hands, and off your ring goes,” Orlowski told ABC 7.
Digging down more than a foot at the prompt of a loud ‘ping’ from his detector, Orlowski found the ring, which not only bore the name of the school, Fordham University, but also an inscription of a name on the inside of the band.
Orlowski did a few minutes of searching, given that he had so many clues as to the ring’s owner, and managed to find the Fordham class of 1969 reunion Facebook group. There, moderator Karen Manning was so impressed with Orlowski’s honesty that she was determined to find the person to whom the jewel belonged.
“He could have just sold it and made some money on it, but it restored my faith in humanity,” Manning said.
For his part, and true to his honest nature that Manning detected, Orlowski admitted it was his wife who urged him to seek out the ring’s owner.
“She says, ‘Well, if you lost your ring, wouldn’t you want it returned?’ And so, right. The question, answered,” Orlowski told 7’s Sonia Rincon.
Dr. DiStefano considers it a miracle and sent a lovely thank-you present to Orlowski via the return address.
WATCH the story below…
The good news in this story is the honesty of the finder and the eventual return of the ring. Today’s JohnKu talks about honesty. I hope you have a lovely weekend.
Today, I randomly opened Detour on the Eternal Road to page 247 and then, with my eyes closed, pointed to the page. The word closest to my finger is turning. This is our prompt.
This post ran first on Labor Day 2015 and every Labor Day after that. I thought it was pretty good advice, so here it is again.
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In honor of Labor Day, I’ve decided to boil the top ten list down to the most essential items. Let’s all remember those who make our lives easier and more pleasant. Of course, the remembrance includes us authors.
Top Ten Things Not to Do on Labor Day
10 through 1
On Labor Day, have fun, but do not drink and drive. If you do, at best, you are a fool. At worst, you could hurt or kill an innocent person, not to mention your guilty self.
Today, we are checking out the deer in the neighborhood. We are catered by Maie Day of Austin, and our entertainment is Steve Martin, Allison Brown, and Jackson Browne.
