Wednesday Story Day – AKA Hump Day

Hump Day

 

It is Wednesday Story Day again. Last week we witnessed Harriet and Alice in a bit of panic over the information Frank Plano had to offer about them being seen in Kenosha. What was especially troubling to them was the possibility that Frank knew they were frequent visitors to the Severides. Harriet made the suggestion that Alice call Frank and see if he has filed his report. If not, she reasoned that they could do something to silence him. I see Alice is on the phone, so let’s get over there.

“So, Mr. Plano you are still open to getting our side of the story? Oh I know I was rude, and I apologize. Well, Harriet and I are at her house. You can come over, and we will speak openly. Yes, we will tell you what we know. You can be the judge as to the relevance of the information. Okay then. We will see you shortly. Goodbye Mr. Plano.”
“What did he say?”
“He has not completed his report.”
“Is he coming over?”
“Yes. I thought you would know that from my side of the conversation.”
“Just checking. What are we going to tell him?”
“I think we ought to let him know we visited the Severides.”
“You crazy? What excuse could we possibly have to be visiting the Severides.”
“I’m sure he knows they were major drug dealers.”
“Yeah, so you gonna confess your habit to him?”
“What’s the big deal? So I used to pop heron. So what.”
“How about the coke? You were arrested for possession.”
“And where did that lead? Seth killed those charges. You think just because I tell a private eye I used to do drugs, I’m going to get arrested?”
“You still using?”
“You know I’m not.”
“I see your point then.”
“So, what do we have to lose? Let’s just come clean. We bought drugs from the Severides. Yes, we were there the night they were killed. We didn’t do anything and have nothing to hide.”
“What about that blood spurt when you shot up.”
“What do you mean?”
“You pulled the needle out too quickly, and your blood fell on the floor.”
“I wiped that up.”
“You ever see CSI? You can’t just wipe up blood. If the lab guys go in there for more testing, they will find your blood. How do you explain that?”
“Let me think.”
“Oh oh. Frank’s at the front door.”
“Let me think Harriet. I’ll just say I cut myself.”
“With a large knife as you were killing the Severides?”
“Very funny, Harriet. Let Frank in. I’ll think of something.”

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #154

Using Keith’s words. “Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keith@channing.info before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here – pingbacks don’t often work.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, next Monday.”

The photo.

Kreative Kue #154

The Jury by John W. Howell © 2017

“I guess we have to go through with this, huh?”

“This is a trial. Of course, we have to go through this. Our client deserves the best defense possible.”

“Look at that rabble. You think we are going to seat a fair jury?”

“We have to try. I agree they don’t look like much.”

“How are we going to proceed?”

“Let me think. I think we can get a number of folks who can appreciate our client’s hardscrabble childhood.”

“This may be the only way to go”

“Why would you say that?”

“Half of those people look like they haven’t had a meal lately.”

“I’m going to pardon those kids though. I don’t think we will get them to go along.”

“I agree.”

“The other thing we need to pay attention to is how our client is dressed.”

“Dressed? Why?”

“Makes a difference. We don’t want them to make any assumptions based on what the client looks like.”

“So what are you going to dress our client to look like.”

“Not sure. I’ll have to think on that one.”

“Are you sure we can’t broker a deal?”

“Our client insists he is innocent.”

“But weren’t there tons of witnesses?”

“I know. The truth is I think the guy is guilty.”

“But you have to defend him right?”

“Of course.”

“Why did he do it do you think.”

“Take candy from a baby? I have no idea.”

Merry Christmas Day from Lucy and Bailey

Merry Christmas

“Hey, Boss. Why do we have to pose here like this?”

“It is Christmas, Lucy. We need to send a greeting to our blog friends.”

“Okay, but hurry. My neck is getting sore.”

“You are supposed to look at me.”

“Won’t happen, Boss.  You know I’m a dog, right?”

“Say, ‘Merry Christmas,’ you two.”

“Merry Christmas you two.”

“Thanks, guys.”

“Where’s our treat?”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “yule/you’ll/Yul”

Stream of Consciousness

 

You’ll not believe it is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again. This week’s prompt is “yule/you’ll/Yul.” Linda Hill says to start the post with one of them. Now you know why the first sentence was so goofy. If you would like to join this band of misfits, visit Linda’s blog and read all about how. Here is the link.

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Dec. 23/17

Yule/you’ll/Yul by John W. Howell © 2017

“What is your name , son?”

“Yul.”

“Yul?”

“Yes, sir?”

“You’ll have to give me a hand here.”

“Yes sir. What are you doing?”

“Trying to get this Yule log into the sleigh.”

“Not sure you have the strength for that, sir.”

“Guess why I asked you for help?”

“Not sure.”

“You kidding me?”

“No sir.”

“Because I don’t have the strength.”

“Ah. We are on the same page.”

“So grab the end there.”

“Hummph.”

“Heavy right?”

“Mmmpphhh.”

“We are almost there.”

“There. We have it in the sleigh.”

“Thank you, Yul. You were a big help.”

“Sir?”

“Yes, Yul.”

“I hope you’ll have a Merry Christmas.”

“Thank you, Yul. I hope you’ll have the same.”

“I think I will.”

“You think?”

“Yes. Especially if you give me your wallet.”

 

Friday – JohnKu – TGIF

Funny Friday

 

We are getting close to Christmas, and it looks like I have everything under control. All my shopping is done, packages wrapped, and chores finished. (There are always chores) The fact that Christmas Eve is on a Sunday has me a little confused. As you may know, I do a Views of the neighborhood on Sunday and a Top Ten Things Not to Do on Mondays.  In the spirit of the Holiday, I will not be doing a classic Views or Top Ten. It is my intent to take the two days to remember the spirit of the season.

I hope your holiday will be filled with the joy intended. This week’s JohnKu talks about the holiday wish.

Holiday by John W. Howell © 2017

So this is Christmas,

Time to reflect true meaning. . .

A meaningful peace.

Thursday – A Little Personal – Construction

Lucy

“You busy Boss?”

“Oh just trying to finish this chapter. But for you anything.”

“You hear all that hammering?

“Yeah, It is more construction.”

Lucy and Bailey

“These new guys?”

“Nope, the same guys as last week.”

“Well, they don’t smell the same.”

“Nothing ever smells the same, Lucy. So what are they doing out there Pops?”

“They are doing what’s called a demo of the area.”

“See the handrails leaning up against the glass?

“Yeah, Pops I see ’em.”

“They came off the sun porch.”

“Pops, come back in here. That drop is a long one.”

“Just a couple more pictures. Here is another shot of the porch.”

“An outside shot of the rails leaning and a big hole.”

“Pops. You gotta quit now.”

“Okay, I’m ready with this photo of the other end.”

“I’m back, Bailey.”

“None too soon, Pops. You had me a little nervous.”

“So you were concerned about me?”

“That is a long way down for the dinner dish, Pops.”

“I get it, Bailey.”

“How about you, Lucy. You concerned?”

“Huh, what? You say something, Boss? So what did all that look like before the demo?”

Here you go, Lucy. Some before shots.”

Hurricane Harvy damage

“I’m glad someone is fixing those handrails and deck, Boss. I don’t think I want to go out there.”

“Me too, Lucy. Me either.”

Wednesday Story Day – AKA – Hump Day

Hump Day in Texas

 

It is Wednesday Day again. Last week we witnessed Frank Plano asking some questions of Alice Weston. When he got to the point of asking Alice about being in Kenosha the same day Lucas’ parents were murdered, Alice pretty much showed him the door. I see Alice is approaching Harriet Murphy’s house, so I guess she is in some kind of hurry to relate the conversation with Frank. Let’s go and maybe learn something about that night in Kenosha.

“Open the damn door, Harriet. Since when do you lock it?”
“Since we have that private eye snooping around. There come on in.”
“For heaven’s sake. That’s all I need. To have that Frank character see me hustling over to see you right after I threw him out of my house.”
“Then why are you here? You could have called.”
“I don’t trust the phones anymore. He may have mine bugged.”
“Oh come on, Alice. Aren’t you overreacting?”
“How about if I told you he knows we were in Kenosha the night the Severides were murdered?”
“Okay. That is a little concerning.”
“You bet it is. Also, he knows that we used to visit the Severides.”
“No way. How could he find that out?”
“Beats me. This guy may have a crystal ball for all I know. I’m telling you we are in deep yogurt.”
“Come on. Alice. Get a grip. So we visited the Severides? So what?”
“And we saw them right before they were killed. You think that is just a piece of idle gossip that is going to go away if Frank finds that out.”
“Did he say he knew?”
“No, he just said he knows we were in town.”
“Okay then. We were in town. We had shopping to do or something. No harm no foul.”
“You gotta keep these basketball sayings to yourself. If he knows we were in Kenosha, how long do you think it will take to track us to the Severides?”
“Unlike you, I don’t think that’s possible. Hell, we were discreet as always.”
“How did he know we had visited them before?”
“Hmm. I see what you’re saying. You want some tea?”
“Tea is not the answer, Harriet. We need to do something.”
“Let me think. Do you think Frank has made this report yet?”
“How would I know?”
“Why don’t you call him and tell him you’ve been thinking and maybe you need to talk again.”
“Yeah, then what?”
“You’ll ask him if he’s filed his report.”
“If he has?”
“We’ll have to ride it out.”
“If he has not?”
“We might need to think of a way to silence him. Here give him a call.”

Tuesday – Anything possible – Kreative Kue #153

In Keith’s words. “Using this photo (Below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keith@channing.info before 6 pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here – pingbacks don’t often work.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, next Monday.

The Photo.

Kreative Kue #153

The Gift by John W. Howell © 2017

“How did you come to buy this present for me?”

“It just spoke to me as I walked by it in the store.”

“What kind of store was that?”

“A little shop down on Thirteenth Street.”

“Thirteenth street? What was the address?”

“Six-sixty-sixth Thirteenth Street, why?”

“Oh, just a little curious. I noticed on the card that the store had a funny name.”

“Funny how?”

“All Things Eternal sounds a little weird.”

“Oh, I don’t think so. I think they stand behind their products is all.”

“Look at this inspection tag. It’s signed by someone named Cya.”

“A very common name in the apparatus business. You going to try them or not?”

“I’m just a little concerned about this whole thing.”

“Why?”

“Look down. That is one heck of a fall if they don’t work.”

“For heaven’s sake. There is a lifetime warranty.”

“A what?”

“Lifetime warranty.”

“Whose lifetime.”

“The user of course.”

“Now you’ve convinced me. There is no way I’m putting these wings on and stepping off this ledge.”

“Chicken.”

 

Top Ten Things Not to Do Wrapping Presents

Gift wrapping no nos

 

I always enjoy wrapping presents. I pretty much avoid the “store gift wrap” in favor of the messes I create. I think putting oneself into the process is a way you can show the recipients of the gift that you really care. The inspiration for this post is every year of doing my own. I hope you enjoy it.

10 If you are gift wrapping, don’t think it’s the thought that counts. If you do, at best your wrapping will look like you didn’t think at all. At worst, your package will be mistaken for trash and never opened in the first place. (No wonder you didn’t get a thank you, Cassidy.)

9 If you are gift wrapping, do not try to use a fake box with Tiny the WWF champ who just enrolled in a court-ordered intensive course on how to handle disappointment. If you do at best, you won’t be in the room when Tiny opens the Tiffany box to find a screwdriver. At worst, although Tiny will do his best to control himself it may be more than one can expect. (You have been thinking of removing that dining room wall anyway right, Crane?)

8 If you are gift wrapping, do not use seasonally inappropriate paper. If you do, at best others will think you mentally unstable. At worst, friends and family will gather and determine what to do with you now that you have lost track of time. (Okay so you wanted to save a few bucks on paper, but Easter wrap was not the way to go, Clive.)

7 If you are gift wrapping, do not forget the nametags. If you do, at best you’ll remember each gift and who it goes to just by the wrapping. At worst, Uncle Phil will wonder what you are trying to say with the Lady Schick electric razor gift. (You thought for sure that red box was a bottle of bourbon, Cal. I wonder what aunt Helen thinks of it.)

6 If you are gift wrapping, do not forget to measure twice before cutting once. If you do, at best there is a smaller box that can be wrapped with your mistakes. At worst, you have another trip to the wrapping store to get additional supplies. (Too bad they are all out of Christmas wrap huh, Cameron? They have plenty of Easter wrap though.)

5 If you are gift wrapping, do not use the same paper for all the gifts. If you do, someone will recognize it as last year’s $0.99 Target sale item. At worst, your display under the tree will look like the packages were done by Mrs. Jones first grade class. (Why is everyone asking if these gifts are meant for a Toys for Tots donation, Carling?)

4 If you are gift wrapping, do not throw away the return receipts. If you do, at best all your gifts will be perfect. At worst, those gifts that were a little off the mark will show up next year. (You could have sworn you gave this scarf to your cousin last year huh, Carmichael?)

3 If you are gift wrapping, do not think more scotch tape will solve sloppy wrapping. If you do, at best your recipients will have a scissor handy to cut through. At worst, you’ll get calls about paper cuts and tape in kid’s hair. (Maybe taking more time would have been a good idea, Carver.)

2 If you are gift wrapping, do not try to create what you are not qualified to design. If you do, at best yours will be the last one opened. At worst, your package will end up looking like a bizarre thing that should be soaked in water before being disarmed. (Gotta wonder why your brother-in-law called the bomb squad. That grenade on top was a dummy right, Caster?)

1 If you are gift wrapping, do not think a bunch of sparkling confetti in the box will be well received. If you do, at best the recipient will be kind and not shoot you. At worst, the gift will be opened on the new white living room carpet. (You just know that stuff will be there until next year don’t you, Chadwick?)