As I was finishing my cup of coffee and a wee scone, I heard what could best be described as a clatter on the roof.  Knowing it is nowhere near Christmas, I had a feeling in my gut that it may be of rather large import and worthy of investigation. However, I hesitated at the back door since whatever hit the roof was now in the process of sliding from its initial point of impact to the ground. My better judgment reminded me that stepping out of the doorway into the vector of a falling object is one way for a quick trip to eternity.

I was happy I waited since the force of the falling object, even though it was connected to a parachute, made a large dent in the yard. When it was safe, I approached the container and could see the name ACME Power Rocket stenciled on the side. There was a shipping invoice attached as well, and I tore it off. You guessed it. The recipient was one Wilie E. Coyote in care of Universal Studios, Hollywood, California. You have to wonder how it got here. Maybe it came by the USPS. Also included in the invoice was a note. It read.

Dear sir or Madam,

Please forward this package to the rightful recipient should it end up in your hands. I am trying to save money, so I shipped via USPS, and as we all know, sometimes things go astray. Also, here is a message from Linda Hill. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “wee.” Use the word “wee” or find a word that contains it and use it in your post. Have fun!

Thanks in advance.

Your friend,

Wilie E. Coyote

If you would like to have fun visit Linda’s blog and read how. Here is the link https://lindaghill.com/2021/08/06/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-aug-7-2021/

Wee by John W. Howell © 2021

“Hoo wee.”

“What?”

“This prompt.”

“What is it?”

“Wee.”

“Oh my.”

“Yeah.”

“Don’t go there.”

“Where?”

“You know.”

“Tell me.”

“I need to go wee.”

“Go ahead.”

“No, that’s where you are not supposed to go.”

“I don’t have to wee.”

“Okay, let’s start over. What were you going to write about?”

“Little pig.”

“Wee, wee, wee, all the way home pig?”

“Yeah, but now that you have tainted the word, it sounds gross.”

“Me tainted?”

“You, Robert. Are you having a stroke?”

“Okay, I think we have been around the slapstick horn enough. Let’s go get a beer.”

“Wee.”

“Just stop.”

“Wee little Willy won’t go home.”

“I’m leaving.”

“No, wait. I’ll stop.”

“Promise?”

“Oui.”

I went on a long walk today to clear my head since I knew I would be challenged to complete the Stream of Consciousness prompt later. I was in deep thought about some inconsequential matter, like should I powerwash the driveway. Then, all of a sudden, my attention was snapped to fully aware as I heard someone screaming, “Help me.”

My gaze went to a rather large brown van that was caroming off what is now a collapsed lamppost. The post altered the vector of the van so that now it was headed directly for me. As it got closer and larger, I could see a wide-eyed, uniformed driver clutching the wheel and screaming his head off. This was clearly a delivery van out of control, and not wishing to find myself the thickness of a pancake, I managed to jump to the right and grab what some would say is a sissy bar connected to the driver’s side of the van.

The three of us continued down the street, which was now taking on the topography of a soapbox racer course. I swung into the van and asked the driver if I could be of some help.  “No brakes,” he yelled. For the first time since seeing this run-a-way train, I grew concerned. The law of physics dictates that the vehicle velocity will continue to increase until such time as a deceleration event occurs. The speed at the point of deceleration will mean the difference between survival or not. “We need to slow this mother down,” I yelled. The driver looked at me with an expression I have seen on countless teenagers’ faces before the “No shit” statement.

Long story short, the van did indeed slow down by jumping a curb and tearing through several layers of shrubs, fencing, and into the Donavan’s pool. As we were sinking, the driver asked me my name and then handed me an envelope. Of course, it was from Linda Hill. As the water was reaching my chest, I tore it open and read the note. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “the last photo you took.”Take the last photo you snapped. What’s the first word that comes to mind when you look at it? That word is your prompt. Enjoy!

As the water rose to my chin, I thought about that last photo and remembered it was of Twiggy and Lucy. The word “cute” went through my mind, and the darkness crept into my consciousness.

“Stand up,” I heard from the edge of eternity. I opened my eyes and did indeed stand up to find I was in water up to my waist. “We are saved,” I screamed. The driver had nothing to say.

If you would like to enjoy visit Linda Hill’s blog and read how. Here is the link.

https://lindaghill.com/2021/07/30/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-31-2021/

Cute by John W. Howell © 2021

“What’s with all the drama?”

“I just think people ought to know where the prompts come from, is all.”

“Other participants just do the prompt without the preamble upfront.”

“Maybe you ought to go talk to other participants.”

“Cute.”

“What do you mean.”

“Your snappy comeback was cute.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“I was being sarcastic.”

“Well, that’s new.”

“Cute again. So what are you going to write about that’s cute?”

“Nothing.”

“What do you mean ‘nothing?'”

“I think you said it all.”

“You’re mad.”

“A little.”

“Why?”

“I don’t get no satisfaction.”

“Cute reference. Want to explain?”

“I kill myself thinking of the prompt, and you come along and make light of what I do.”

“How much do you get paid for this gig?”

“Nothing.”

“The prosecution rests. It is beer-thirty now. Do you want to continue this philosophical discussion or dump six into that ready-made receptacle?”

“You have a cute way of making my choice easy.”

“Hold on, brother. Don’t use the word ‘cute’ when describing my behavior.”

“Goodness. Hit a nerve, did I?”

“I have the street cred to maintain. We doing beer or not?”

“Lead on Mac Duff.”

“Cute.”

“Stop it.”

I was waiting in line to use the ATM machine outside my favorite Starbucks. The line was agonizingly slow, and I could feel the little caffeine-deprived miner trying to pickax his way out of the front of my skull. The little pick, pick, pick feeling got stronger as the next customer seemed to be doing a week’s worth of transactions. Only two away from getting some cash that will allow me to trade for a grande miner killer. Suddenly, the guy behind me told me not to turn around or make a sound. Something hard was poking my backbone, and it dawned on me that I was about to be relieved of my salvation cash. I use my elbow to dislodge the hard thing and spun to face my tormentor. He had a look of shock on his face and quickly shoved an envelope in my shirt pocket and ran off.

Given the current rise in COVID cases, I did not want to touch the envelope until I could get some sanitizer inside the Starbucks. Finally, I was at the ATM, got the cash, ran into Starbucks, ordered the grande, waited an hour, gulped several ounces, and killed the miner. Then I opened the envelope. There was one sheet of paper with this message from Linda Hill. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “color/colour.” Use it as a noun, a verb, or pick a color and write about it–use it any way you like. Have fun!

If you would rather have fun than be accosted in an ATM line, go to Linda Hill’s blog and read how easy it is. Here’s the link. https://lindaghill.com/2021/07/23/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-24-2021/

Color/Colour by John W. Howell © 2021

“It’s Saturday, so before I say more do you have the prompt?”

“I do, and it is color or as our Northern neighbors say ‘colour'”

“What do you mean, Northern neighbors. Sounds the same to me.”

“They spell it c-o-l-o-u-r.”

“So do our previous oppressors.”

“Huh?”

“The British. They spell it the same way.”

“What’s up with that?”

“Goes back aways, I think. I’m not really sure. What are you going to write about?”

“I thought I would discuss my favorite color.”

“Which is?”

“Amber.”

“Amber is an unusual choice.”

“Does it remind you of anything?”

“A bottle.”

“Or six.”

“Right with you. You buying?”

“For you? Sure.”

” I love you, man.”

“Don’t say that unless you are drunk.”

“Why.”

“Sounds creepy otherwise.”

“You got it.”

I was sitting on the front porch this morning enjoying the sun and the long-running chatter of the mockingbird. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I detected some movement. Sure enough, a large truck turned into the cul-de-sac and stopped in front of my house. The driver blew his air horn which, in addition to stopping my heart, cleared the surrounding block of all manner of wildlife. Finally, the driver dismounted from the behemoth and slowly walked up to the porch. Toothpick in the way I barely understood his question. Then I caught on; he was asking if I was me. I told him I was, and he shoved a clipboard under my nose with a command to sign where marked.

Not knowing what else to do, I signed. He then turned tail and went to the rear of the huge trailer. The clanking of doors, hum of tailgate lowering, and grunt of the driver led me to believe there was something heavy now on the street. After much difficulty turning around, the truck pulled away, leaving a large box. I walked up to the box and was stunned that it was taller than me. You would think the driver could have helped move it closer to the house. While scratching my head, I looked at the other side and discovered this portrait.

I think there is more to the box story. While thinking what it could be, I discovered an envelope with a single sheet of paper and this message. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “least-favorite word.” Use your least-favorite word in your post. If you can’t decide on one, use a word that just really bugs you. Enjoy! I thought immediately of the word Awesome. If you would like to enjoy this kind of prompt, visit Linda Hill’s blog and read how easy it is. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2021/07/16/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-17-2021/

Awesome by John W. Howell © 2021.

“How’s it going?”

“Awesome. I have this week’s prompt.”

“Oh, that’s awesome. What is it.”

“My least favorite word. Isn’t that awesome?’

“Yes, awesome. What is your least favorite word.”

“It’s awesome.”

“I know it’s awesome that you have a prompt. What is your least favorite word?”

“My least favorite word is awesome.”

“Being awesome, it must be some word. What is it?”

“The word is awesome.”

“I’m sure it is. Now, if you would only tell me this awesome word.”

“Listen, Bud. I told you it is awesome.”

“I think we are in a dew loop here. So let me go out on a limb. Is the word awesome?”

“Yes. Now you are awesome; you got it.”

“Me awesome? Got what?”

“Awesome. The prompt.”

“OMG, the prompt is awesome. If that is your least favorite word, why do you use it?”

“That is the whole idea to use your least favorite word. How awesome is that?”

“Totally awesome.”

“You putting me on?”

“A little.”

“The beer is on you then.”

“Awesome sauce.”

“Gad.”

“I know, right? Let’s go.”

I was lounging in the backyard, thinking pure thoughts about the world at large. All of a sudden, I heard what sounded like a police whistle, and a guy who looked like the McDonald’s Hamburgerler jumped over the fence and landed flat-footed in front of me. “May I help you?” I said. His eyes tightened, and I could see him turn red behind the mask. “You have a gun?” he responded. I told him I didn’t have a gun, but he could borrow my shovel. He burst out laughing and handed me an envelope. He then jumped back over the fence, and I heard more noise, then silence.

I opened the envelope, and here is what was inside written on the back of a canceled cashier’s check.

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “hope.” Use it any way you’d like. Have fun!

The check was for a million dollars and since it was canceled, all hope for the Bentley Turbo Convertable went out the window.

If you would like to have fun go to Linda Hill’s blog and read how easy it is. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2021/07/09/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-10-2021/

Hope by John W. Howell © 2021

“Hey bud, what’s going on?”

“Saturday prompt.”

“Ah, another stumper?”

“No, this one is easy.”

“Like the bartender asked the horse, why the long face?”

“It is a word that can describe optimism or pessimism depending on how it is used.”

“Humm sounds like when my beer glass is empty.”

“I’m serious. I have a tough time choosing which.”

“Why not both? Then you can call whatever this is a treatise.”

“That is a good idea. The word is hope.”

“OMG, something you need a lot of for sure.”

“Uh..okay. Anyway, the word hope can mean looking forward with the optimism that things will get better.”

“Or?”

“When someone declares there is no hope, it pretty much means things will stay the same or get worse.”

“So you going to give an example of each?”

“Humm. How about I’m out of money, and very thirsty.”

“I don’t get it.”

“I hope some nice guy will stand me to a beer.”

“Yeah, I hope you are right.”

“Wait a minute that was your cue.”

“I don’t want you to lose hope, but I have no money either.”

“A perfect storm and example of no hope.”

“Wait, there is hope yet. I can put the beer on my tab at the Purple Octopus.”

“Gosh I hate that place.”

“But it offers us hope to quench our thirst.”

“Better hope than no hope I guess. Let’s go.”

“By the way. Don’t use their glasses.”

“This gets better and better.”

“Order a bottle and don’t take any of the bar nuts.”

“My hope for a happy ending is now fading.”

“Don’t touch your face until  we get hand sanitizer.”

“Hope is gone.”

“Maybe but still there’s beer.”

“There is that.”

I had just finished my coffee and was looking at an enormous weed that had grown overnight on the lawn. All of a sudden, a  little shadow was starting to spread around the weed. Looking up, I could see a still small square getting larger by the second. My brain finally clicked and realized it was an object descending from on high toward the Earth. Taking a glance around, I could see the shadow growing exponentially in four directions with me at the center.  I willed my feet to move just as the large ACME fireworks box embedded itself into the ground. When the dust and scraps of lawn settled, I realized that I could have been squashed by the substantial box. The good part was I realized the weed could not have survived the landing.

Gently I removed the cover, and among the rockets and pouches of explosives, I found this:

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “contains ‘igh.’” Find a word that contains the letters “igh” in that order and use it in your post. Enjoy!

Clearly, Linda Hill has found a new delivery service. I did call Wil E. Coyote to come to pick up his stuff. If you would like to have fun like this, visit Linda’s blog and find out how easy it is. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2021/07/02/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-3-2021/

IGH by John W. Howell © 2021

“Why so glum—”

“Don’t say, chum.”

“Okay. What’s the problem as if I couldn’t guess?”

“It’s this prompt. It has me buffaloed.”

“Not a hard thing to do.”

“Come on.”

“Okay, sorry. Why are you buffaloed?”

“Words with igh? Someone is pulling my leg.”

“I can think of high. You could do a diary of our pub work.”

“Nobody is going to be interested in that.”

“I think they would be delighted.”

“Hey, you got one.”

“See, not so hard.”

“Do another.”

“Light bulb, but it doesn’t have anything to do with anything.”

“The rules don’t say it has to mean something.”

“Well, then you and I might be in the right place.”

“We have four so far, right?”

“Five.”

“I want to tighten up and win this.”

“You now have six. Why not stop now before you become bigheaded.”

“I would really like to have eight words with igh. That would be swell.”

“You made it. There are eight.”

“Let’s hit the highway then. Our job is done here and the pub calleth.”

“People might think we are shallow. All we do is prompts and beer.”

“Have a highball then.  At least you’ll look sophisticated.”

“Forget it. Who needs to go to greater heights anyway?”

“I agree. Certainly not us. Let’s go.”

I just got up and went to the window to see what all the chirping was about. I looked out on the back lawn, and there was a box sitting in the middle of the yard. There must have been a hundred birds all jumping up and down and all around the box. I quickly went outside to see what was causing all the commotion. The birds parted, and I see that the box is from the ACME seed company. That certainly explains the excitement. What is not explained is how the box got there in the first place. Deciding to ignore the mystery, I opened the box and found a note from Linda Hill with the following message:

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “up/down.” Use one, use them both, but try to put one in your first sentence. Bonus points if you use the other in your last sentence. Have fun!

I let the birds have the seed and thought I heard a “beep, beep” as I walked back into the house.

I had to check back to my first sentence and was pleased to see I had used “up.” So I’m on the road to bonus points and one step closer to the Turbo Bentley Convertable.

Up/Down by John W. Howell © 2021

“What are all these birds doing around your house?”

“It’s a long story.”

“Involves the prompt for today, I’ll bet.”

“Yeah, it does but only in a transcendental way.”

“Okay I’ll take you word for that. What’s the prompt?”

“Up/Down. Bonus points for using one in the first sentence and the other in the last sentence.”

“Oh, too bad. You missed the first sentence opportunity.”

“Au contraire mon frère. I nailed it. It was before you arrived.”

“I’ll take your word. So what else is up?”

“Oh please, that is as trite as all get out.”

“Just trying to help.”

“Next you are going to say you are down with something like beer drinking.”

“Had crossed my mind.”

“We need to think of some way to use up/down in an original way.”

“How about up/down exercise.”

“Common.”

“Uptown/downtown.”

“Not really the pure form of up/down.”

“Okay, I give up.”

“That’s a start.”

“No I mean I quit. Give up. Surrender.”

“Yeah, I get it. You’ve had it up to there.”

“Now you are doing dumb. What do you say about packing up.”

“I like it. Where should we go?”

“Down to the pub.”

“Now I can say anything since that could have been the last sentence.”

“You could say you were down with going to the pub.”

“And lay down all my principles?”

“It’s only down the street.”

“I’m down with it.”

“You are a good man.”

“Don’t say any more. I need to end this with down in the last sentence.”

“Okay then.”

“Grrr, I may have to come down hard on you.”

“Not saying a word.”

“I’m down with that too.”