My day started like most. I first went to the Bentley dealer and checked out a new turbo convertible for a test ride. The dealer wanted to make the whole idea more complicated, but I convinced them that as a world-famous influencer, it would be worth their while to let me drive the car. Out I cruised in a spanking clean black Saffire convertible with a fawn interior. I decided to head for the countryside, to open this baby up to see what it could do.

I turned up the Bang & Olufsen, 1500W, 16 speakers, and 16-channel amp so that I could surround myself with concert-level music. I was living the dream with beautiful sound and the wind in my hair until I noticed a huge USPS 18 wheeler was slowly moving over into my lane. It was clear the driver did not see me. If he had seen me,, he would have known it is bad to crowd someone in a Bentley. I decided to apply the ample brakes and let him move over.

Suddenly, his right wheels hit the shoulder, spraying the Bentley with what must have been a thousand rocks. I have never seen so many spiderweb cracks in a windshield before. I was forced to pull over. The USPS driver stopped as well and came walking back to where I sat. He handed me an envelope and a card. The card had a phone number to call to place a claim. The envelope was addressed to me and was from Linda Hill. The driver mentioned I should probably take my Ford to the dealer for an estimate first before making a claim. I thanked him and got out of the Bentley. Given all the dents, the Bentley did indeed look like a Ford Galaxy 500. I sighed and thanked him and opened the envelope. Here is what was inside.

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “my.” Start your post with the word “My.” Bonus points if you end your post with “yours.” Enjoy!

I think I was lucky to start the post with “my.”

If you would like to enjoy it as well, visit Linda Hill’s blog and read how. Here is the link https://lindaghill.com/2021/08/27/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-aug-28-2021/

My/Yours by John W. Howell © 2021

“My brain just can’t figure out why do you go through all that introduction stuff.”

“I enjoy writing a narrative is the only reason. Talking with you all the time makes me stale.”

“Stale? Boring don’t you mean?”

“Well maybe that too.”

“What’s the prompt?”

“Weren’t you listening?”

“To be frank I think I dozed off when you brought up the sound system in the Bentley.”

“You shoulda been there. It was sweet. The prompt is ‘My/Yours.’ Start the post with ‘my,’ end with ‘yours.'”

“Okay so you nailed the ‘my’ already. Before I ask what you’re going to do with ‘yours,’ what happened when you took that Bentley back to the dealer?”

“You should have seen his face. I have to laugh every time I think of it.”

“Weren’t you nervous?”

“No, as I said while you were taking a nap I had a claim number from the USPS.”

“But still.”

“He did rant and rave a while. Threatened to put the three hundred thou on my credit card.”

“That would have been humorous.”

“Just imagine the folks at VISA when a Bentley dealer calls to charge a Bentley to my account.”

“I’m sure the decline would have burnt his ear hairs.”

“Yeah I just opened the door and walked away. I have to say, sadly that car looked like a golf ball.”

“Well alls well that ends well. How about a beer?”

“Sounds good. Who’s turn to buy?”

“I’m going to answer you with a response that you don’t dare dispute.”

“Why?”

“If you do you won’t get the bonus points.”

“How can that be. Who’s turn?”

“Wait for it. . . .Yours.

I was taking a break during my bike ride and having a sip of water. Then, looking out over the scenic countryside, I spotted a cloud of dust heading in my direction. I thought it strange that a cloud of dust would appear in a neighborhood that was completely paved. But, since I figured it would be another one of those fictional engagements, I decided to go with the flow. Sure enough, coming around the bend was a wagon train being led by Ward Bond on horseback. “Hey, partner,” he yelled down at me.”You know of a place where we can make camp for the night?” As luck would have it, our park was free of weekend activities, so I gave him directions. “Much obliged,” he said. He then gave a sign to the wagons to follow him, which they all did.

It was about four hours before the last wagon came ambling by where I was standing with my bike. A young man walking beside the wagon came over and handed me an oilcloth-wrapped parcel. I tried to tell him I didn’t expect a present, but he insisted I keep the package. Once the wagon was out of sight, I unwrapped the parcel and found two things. The first was a block of pemmican. The second, a piece of parchment paper with a message. The message read, Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “luck.” Use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!

Yes, I did want to follow the train to the park and maybe learn about crossing the plains, but I knew it was just a figment of someone’s imagination and probably would be a waste of time. It sure seemed real, though. I did try the pemmican and can tell you not to bother. The smell alone will get ya.

If you want to enjoy, go to Linda Hill’s blog and read how easy it is. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2021/08/13/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-aug-14-2021/

Luck by John W. Howell © 2021

“Here we are on Saturday.”

“Yup.”

“So, what’s the prompt?”

“Luck.”

“Luck?”

“Luck.”

“What you got?”

“If it wasn’t for bad luck, I’d have no luck at all.”

“You serious?”

“It’s a song.”

“Oh. For a minute, I thought I was going to be forced to have an interdiction for you.”

“Nope, everything’s okay. I’m going to sing the song.”

“Please don’t.”

“Why?”

“Number one. You can’t sing.”

“Says who?”

“Number two, There’s beer at the pub calling our name.”

“You got a three?”

“Yup.”

“Let’s hear it.”

“Our word count allocation is up.”

“It’s that stupid intro. Eats word like they were free.”

“So let’s go.”

“Can I hum the song?”

“Sure, if you want to ride on the roof of the car.”

“Let me think about it.”

“Only you would say that.”

As I was finishing my cup of coffee and a wee scone, I heard what could best be described as a clatter on the roof.  Knowing it is nowhere near Christmas, I had a feeling in my gut that it may be of rather large import and worthy of investigation. However, I hesitated at the back door since whatever hit the roof was now in the process of sliding from its initial point of impact to the ground. My better judgment reminded me that stepping out of the doorway into the vector of a falling object is one way for a quick trip to eternity.

I was happy I waited since the force of the falling object, even though it was connected to a parachute, made a large dent in the yard. When it was safe, I approached the container and could see the name ACME Power Rocket stenciled on the side. There was a shipping invoice attached as well, and I tore it off. You guessed it. The recipient was one Wilie E. Coyote in care of Universal Studios, Hollywood, California. You have to wonder how it got here. Maybe it came by the USPS. Also included in the invoice was a note. It read.

Dear sir or Madam,

Please forward this package to the rightful recipient should it end up in your hands. I am trying to save money, so I shipped via USPS, and as we all know, sometimes things go astray. Also, here is a message from Linda Hill. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “wee.” Use the word “wee” or find a word that contains it and use it in your post. Have fun!

Thanks in advance.

Your friend,

Wilie E. Coyote

If you would like to have fun visit Linda’s blog and read how. Here is the link https://lindaghill.com/2021/08/06/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-aug-7-2021/

Wee by John W. Howell © 2021

“Hoo wee.”

“What?”

“This prompt.”

“What is it?”

“Wee.”

“Oh my.”

“Yeah.”

“Don’t go there.”

“Where?”

“You know.”

“Tell me.”

“I need to go wee.”

“Go ahead.”

“No, that’s where you are not supposed to go.”

“I don’t have to wee.”

“Okay, let’s start over. What were you going to write about?”

“Little pig.”

“Wee, wee, wee, all the way home pig?”

“Yeah, but now that you have tainted the word, it sounds gross.”

“Me tainted?”

“You, Robert. Are you having a stroke?”

“Okay, I think we have been around the slapstick horn enough. Let’s go get a beer.”

“Wee.”

“Just stop.”

“Wee little Willy won’t go home.”

“I’m leaving.”

“No, wait. I’ll stop.”

“Promise?”

“Oui.”

I went on a long walk today to clear my head since I knew I would be challenged to complete the Stream of Consciousness prompt later. I was in deep thought about some inconsequential matter, like should I powerwash the driveway. Then, all of a sudden, my attention was snapped to fully aware as I heard someone screaming, “Help me.”

My gaze went to a rather large brown van that was caroming off what is now a collapsed lamppost. The post altered the vector of the van so that now it was headed directly for me. As it got closer and larger, I could see a wide-eyed, uniformed driver clutching the wheel and screaming his head off. This was clearly a delivery van out of control, and not wishing to find myself the thickness of a pancake, I managed to jump to the right and grab what some would say is a sissy bar connected to the driver’s side of the van.

The three of us continued down the street, which was now taking on the topography of a soapbox racer course. I swung into the van and asked the driver if I could be of some help.  “No brakes,” he yelled. For the first time since seeing this run-a-way train, I grew concerned. The law of physics dictates that the vehicle velocity will continue to increase until such time as a deceleration event occurs. The speed at the point of deceleration will mean the difference between survival or not. “We need to slow this mother down,” I yelled. The driver looked at me with an expression I have seen on countless teenagers’ faces before the “No shit” statement.

Long story short, the van did indeed slow down by jumping a curb and tearing through several layers of shrubs, fencing, and into the Donavan’s pool. As we were sinking, the driver asked me my name and then handed me an envelope. Of course, it was from Linda Hill. As the water was reaching my chest, I tore it open and read the note. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “the last photo you took.”Take the last photo you snapped. What’s the first word that comes to mind when you look at it? That word is your prompt. Enjoy!

As the water rose to my chin, I thought about that last photo and remembered it was of Twiggy and Lucy. The word “cute” went through my mind, and the darkness crept into my consciousness.

“Stand up,” I heard from the edge of eternity. I opened my eyes and did indeed stand up to find I was in water up to my waist. “We are saved,” I screamed. The driver had nothing to say.

If you would like to enjoy visit Linda Hill’s blog and read how. Here is the link.

https://lindaghill.com/2021/07/30/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-31-2021/

Cute by John W. Howell © 2021

“What’s with all the drama?”

“I just think people ought to know where the prompts come from, is all.”

“Other participants just do the prompt without the preamble upfront.”

“Maybe you ought to go talk to other participants.”

“Cute.”

“What do you mean.”

“Your snappy comeback was cute.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“I was being sarcastic.”

“Well, that’s new.”

“Cute again. So what are you going to write about that’s cute?”

“Nothing.”

“What do you mean ‘nothing?'”

“I think you said it all.”

“You’re mad.”

“A little.”

“Why?”

“I don’t get no satisfaction.”

“Cute reference. Want to explain?”

“I kill myself thinking of the prompt, and you come along and make light of what I do.”

“How much do you get paid for this gig?”

“Nothing.”

“The prosecution rests. It is beer-thirty now. Do you want to continue this philosophical discussion or dump six into that ready-made receptacle?”

“You have a cute way of making my choice easy.”

“Hold on, brother. Don’t use the word ‘cute’ when describing my behavior.”

“Goodness. Hit a nerve, did I?”

“I have the street cred to maintain. We doing beer or not?”

“Lead on Mac Duff.”

“Cute.”

“Stop it.”

I was waiting in line to use the ATM machine outside my favorite Starbucks. The line was agonizingly slow, and I could feel the little caffeine-deprived miner trying to pickax his way out of the front of my skull. The little pick, pick, pick feeling got stronger as the next customer seemed to be doing a week’s worth of transactions. Only two away from getting some cash that will allow me to trade for a grande miner killer. Suddenly, the guy behind me told me not to turn around or make a sound. Something hard was poking my backbone, and it dawned on me that I was about to be relieved of my salvation cash. I use my elbow to dislodge the hard thing and spun to face my tormentor. He had a look of shock on his face and quickly shoved an envelope in my shirt pocket and ran off.

Given the current rise in COVID cases, I did not want to touch the envelope until I could get some sanitizer inside the Starbucks. Finally, I was at the ATM, got the cash, ran into Starbucks, ordered the grande, waited an hour, gulped several ounces, and killed the miner. Then I opened the envelope. There was one sheet of paper with this message from Linda Hill. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “color/colour.” Use it as a noun, a verb, or pick a color and write about it–use it any way you like. Have fun!

If you would rather have fun than be accosted in an ATM line, go to Linda Hill’s blog and read how easy it is. Here’s the link. https://lindaghill.com/2021/07/23/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-24-2021/

Color/Colour by John W. Howell © 2021

“It’s Saturday, so before I say more do you have the prompt?”

“I do, and it is color or as our Northern neighbors say ‘colour'”

“What do you mean, Northern neighbors. Sounds the same to me.”

“They spell it c-o-l-o-u-r.”

“So do our previous oppressors.”

“Huh?”

“The British. They spell it the same way.”

“What’s up with that?”

“Goes back aways, I think. I’m not really sure. What are you going to write about?”

“I thought I would discuss my favorite color.”

“Which is?”

“Amber.”

“Amber is an unusual choice.”

“Does it remind you of anything?”

“A bottle.”

“Or six.”

“Right with you. You buying?”

“For you? Sure.”

” I love you, man.”

“Don’t say that unless you are drunk.”

“Why.”

“Sounds creepy otherwise.”

“You got it.”