Wednesday Story Time – AKA Hump Day


a funny author pic

Wednesday story time again. Last week we left Charlotte talking to Bob, who still seems to think she is his mother. They got into a discussion about the word that Robert (for you late comers Robert is another personality of Bob’s) called him. Bob didn’t want to say the word but described it as a modern word for what Oedipus did back in Homers time. We need to get back there before Charlotte implodes.

“So why do you think Robert called you that word.”

“I think he knows deep down that some of my problems stem from an Oedipus complex.”

“Did you sleep with your mother?”

“No. Not that I remember anyway. I think it’s a more latent desire.”

“Ew. Bob. You are conscious of this desire?”

“I don’t think so, but something gives me a hint now and then.”

“What do you mean something?”

“I can’t explain it. It is a feeling kinda like a dream feeling.”

“Let me talk to Robert.”

“Hello, Charlotte. It’s me, Robert.”

“Okay, Robert what the hell are you doing?”

“Doing? Whatever do you mean?”

“You are planting some evil thought in Bob’s mind, and you know it.”

“Oh, you mean the sleeping with mommy stuff?”

“Exactly. That stuff.”

“I’m just playing with him. He’s such a wimp. He believes anything I tell him.”

“I’m going to ask you a question, and I want the truth. Agreed?”

“Sure. I mean agreed.”

“Did you sleep with Bob’s mother?”

“Er. Depends on what you mean  by sleep?”

“Oh my gosh.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t get all twisted. Yes, I slept with her but that is what we did went to sleep.”

“Tell me more.”

“She came home one night. I think Bob and I were about nineteen or so. She was drunk out of her mind. We were in bed and she just pushed into the bed.”

“What did she do?”

“Aw, nothing. She told us she loved us and wanted a kiss. I immediately took cover. Bob gave her a kiss.”

“What kind of kiss?”

“A little peck on the cheek. My god, you have a dirty mind.”

“I didn’t say anything. I just asked what kind of kiss?”

“Well, Bob gave her this little peck. He is such a wimp. I jumped in and planted a real kiss on her drunken ass. Well, I mean on her lips.”

“Then what happened?”

“Ah, she kinda made a grab for me but passed out.”

“So you wanted to do more?”

“What the hell is it to you? You come around here making trouble. You’ve got Bob upset and now accuse me of something terrible with my mother. You need to take it back.”

“Robert you are hurting my arm. Please let go.”

“Sure mommy. I’ll let go. After you give me what you owe me.”

“Bob please help me.”

“Charlotte I feel so weak. Robert won’t let me out.”

“Oh, my gosh.”




  1. Oh my gosh indeed.

    So Bob is stronger than Robert. Now I’m really confused. Who is the ego, and who the alter ego? Who is real? What does real even mean? In Spanish, it means ‘royal’, and Robert/Bob is in a right royal mess. Or is it me; am I in a right royal mess?

    My brain hurts.

    1. It does get downright painful. You have to wonder about the three of them. I am getting close to sorting out the mess which I think will make some sense.. I loved your comment. Thanks.

  2. Oh no. Oh no no no. Now the road is twisted and the car is going faster and I don’t think Charlotte is buckled in. I know I’m not. You managed to wake me up John.

    1. Yeah, I hope the jolt wasn’t too much. I wondered if I should hold back but then….naw, let ‘er rip.

      1. LOL… I can’t stop laughing. Great comment, Dan, and great come back John. Hugs!

      2. This story could mess with the mind so I have to keep asking if it is too much.

      3. Nobody said following this story would be easy John. I love how you keep moving it around.

  3. Well, Keith already said it, but “Oh, my gosh” indeed.
    It reminds me of a dream I had of Andy Warhol trying to “get me”… If i could only scream, someone would help me. But i couldn’t scream no matter what… until I finally sat up in bed, let loose a blood curdling screech, woke both myself and my (then) husband. LOL then I turned over and went back to sleep. After all — I had screamed, banishing Andy Warhol, so everything was okay. Okay John — you already knew I was twisted 😈 😀

    1. Laughed out loud on this story. I can imagine what your (then) husband thought with a blood curdling scream in the middle of the night. Thanks for this. 😀

  4. This is just getting worse and worse for Charlotte and Bob. I have to agree with another comment that it’s now fuzzy as to which of the personalities is the primary. They seem to switch back and forth so quickly that I thought they were equal. Now, I’m not so sure. Robert is definitely coming off as the evil side.

    1. Yes. I think so as well. Sounds like this is coming to a conclusion.

      1. Definitely seems that way.

  5. I’ve been awake since 1:30 am, when a powerful thunderstorm rolled through. My head is spinning after reading this. 🙂

    1. Ka-Boom. Thanks Jill.

  6. What Dan Antion said … word for word 🙂

  7. My, my. I suppose lots of problems stem from “mommy issues,” but this story just might take the cake, John! Can hardly wait to see how you’re going to wrap it all up!

  8. Hmm.. I’m wondering if there is another personality sitting back and enjoying the show?

    1. Hmmmm. Stay tuned.

  9. This story is great – I look forward to each weekly installment!

    1. Thank you so much. I’m glad.

  10. When is Charlotte going to help him with his book? Seems like he/they need a therapist more than an editor. And I thought I had problems! Ha!

    1. They do need someone to talk to don’t they?

  11. Wowee, the issues.

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