Photo by Christian Wiediger on Unsplash
This list ran on July 24, 2017. I think it is still current, at least for me. I hope you enjoy it.
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Top Ten Things Not to Do on a Photo Shoot.
This list was inspired by my Producer. We did a shoot yesterday, and the subject of Ten Things Not to Do came up. I have to admit publically that I only did number ten once. The rest – all fiction. I hope you enjoy the list.
10 If you are on a photo shoot, do not ignore the advice of your Producer. If you do, at best, you’ll have lousy photos. At worst, you’ll have bad pictures and an ex-producer. (See what happens when you ignore good advice, Pard?)
9 If you are on a photo shoot, do not take photos of people without permission. If you do, at best, you may have to run fast. At worst, you will take a lovely photo of Tiny, the WWF champ, before he can suck in his substantial belly. (Funny how that camera turned to dust in Tiny’s hand, huh, Tex?)
8 If you are on a photo shoot, do not try to get the whole picture while backing up to the edge of a cliff. If you do, at best, a fence will stop you from going over. At worst, you will be catching multiple shots of the cliff face whizzing by you. (It is now time to worry about the landing, Putz.)
7 If you are on a photo shoot, do not take too many pictures of the same thing. If you do, at best, you’ll waste camera memory. At worst, your Producer will believe you have some kind of fixation on the object. (Sure, you can explain away a building, but that person in a bikini is another matter right, Ferd?)
6 If you are on a photo shoot, do not take the shot until you check the camera settings. If you do, at best, the last setting is still okay for this shot. At worst, you will get home to find that the day’s best shot is a blur. (Oh, don’t worry, Buford. You’ll get another chance to photograph that rare bird in flight. Maybe in the next life.)
5 If you are on a photo shoot, do not take the shot until you check the background. If you do at best, all is good. At worst, that cute puppy in the background just decided to lift a leg as you pressed the shutter button. (And, of course, this is the only photo of the scene, hey, Bunky?)
4 If you are on a photo shoot, do not take photos of places where you see signs that say “No Photographs.” If you do, at best, you might get away with one or two with no flash. At worst, just as you are about to take the first photo, the word SECURITY appears in your viewfinder. (That guy is big and very close to you, Buzzy.)
3 If you are on a photo shoot, do not get carried away with the scene. If you do, at best, you may forget to set something. At worst, every one of your photos has the camera body strap or your thumb front and center. (Well, that was fun. Maybe the circus will return next year, and you can try again, Doofus.)
2 If you are on a photo shoot, do not enter private property to take photos. If you do, at best, you may be asked to leave. At worst, you might be unable to outrun that gigantic bull you thought would make a great picture. (You did see the “No Trespassing – Wild Bull” sign, didn’t you, Ace?)
1 If you are on a photo shoot, do not ignore the weather to get your shot. If you do, at best, you might get wet. At worst, that bolt of lightning sure cleared your sinus. (You know not to stand in water in an electrical storm, don’t ya, Bosco?)
Fiction Favorites 
If I’m taking pictures – great, but if someone else is – I avoid the camera at all costs!
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Same here, GP!
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👍😎
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😊
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Ditto. I think I’m the least photogenic person on planet earth. 😉
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No I am.
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You and The Producer have the same mindset. 😁
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#9 is so true, but ignored so much in today’s world. I will admit it is hard to take some pictures without getting other people in the shot.
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People are getting more grumpy about it too.
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Great tips, John! I love to take photos. The pictures that don’t turn out perfect are always the most fun for me. It’s real life!
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I agree, Jill. I still like the edit feature though.
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News indicates people are taking photos inside movie theaters while the film is playing. Where’s Tiny when you need him?
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The ultimate in rudeness. A good smack is what is needed.
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I like this list, John. I’ve only broken number six (and the photo actually came out OK).
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My thumb is my worst enemy. Good thing the cropping tool is available. 😁
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Okay, I confess to doing #4 once. Couldn’t resist snapping a photo of Ringo Starr on stage. (As did a lot of other concert goers.) 😀
John – never ignore the Producer again!
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Good advice, Joan. Do you still have the photo? Would make a good post.
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I do, John, but I was so far away from the stage, no one would know it was Ringo. That was before I had a phone with a zoom lens.
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gee.
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I laughed at #7. Please define “too many pictures.” There are days when I come home with fifty photos of a single plant, although it’s also true that forty-eight may get deep-sixed.
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So true. My rule is two minimum. Sometimes there are many more. Thanks, Linda.
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The most unruly set of picture takers I have experienced has invariably been at children’s functions in school. No rules apply when parents want to click their kids on stage.
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I’ve experienced it myself. 😁
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Good advice, John! 🙂
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Thank you, Tim.
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Another hilarious list, John. I think I passed your Top Ten points, but hubby fails at #7. He has dozens and dozens of the same picture, same angle, maybe a second apart. Oh well, it’s his camera. Mine is just my cell phone. 😊
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Men are like that. Thanks, Gwen.
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Number 6 has gotten me way too many times. Test shots always. These are funny but so true.
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The old close up always gets me on the next shot. Thanks, Lois.
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I’m guilty of #4, many times over. Many, many times.
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I think we all are, Liz.
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Funny thing, I never did that when I was using a camera with film. 😉
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We were more careful then cause it cost a lot to make mistakes.
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As our parents’ cries of “Don’t waste film!” echoing in our ears.
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Ha ha ha
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If you are on a photoshoot, do not forget to take off the lens cap! (there’s a story behind this one!)
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I’m sure it is a good story like precious moments lost kind of story.
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Lol! Great photo advice, especially when backing up to the edge of a cliff for a great shot. 🙂
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Yes, be careful
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Great list, John 🙂 I may have pressed my luck once or twice or get a lightening shot.
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Yikes. Spoken like a true photographer.
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Maybe I should print out your advice and carry it with me when I’m out on a photo shoot! 😉
“At worst, you will be catching multiple shots of the cliff face whizzing by you.” But at least, you can title each of these shots :so far everything went well”! 😉
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Ha ha ha. Good one Pit.
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👍🤣
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Hi John – I enjoyed these tips – checking the background is very important! Happy Monday 🙂
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How many embarrassing selfies does it take to remind people.
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Ha!
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I may have done one or two of these on your list at least once… I have learned, however and don’t do them now.
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Me too, Dale. I do get my fat thumb in the way at times.
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I don’t often get the thumb in the way but I might overdue on some subjects 😉
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😁
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No photo permission from Tiny? That can be a big problem. I will heed you advice on #1.
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Good idea.
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😀
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My camera settings are as follows . .
Take the Damn Shot Already
Nope, That’s Not It!
and last but not least . . .
Run!!!
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Ha ha ha. Good one.Pilgrim.
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Oh . . that was kinda true.
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Was still funny.
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😉
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I didn’t mention it but this guy is pushing forty. How in the blessed hell can he be that ignorant?
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Dimness knows no age. Look at Biden.
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Bahahahaha! My God, we’re all doomed.
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We are.
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About the only thing I’ve ever done that could be considered a photo shoot was to have a photographer (a former student of mine—aren’t they all 🤣) take photos of my wife and me on our 35th wedding anniversary two years ago. I’ll keep your suggestions nearby. 😊
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The the 40th is coming up quickly.
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These are still good, John! I suppose all of us who have a fascination for photography have committed at least one of them (even if we’re too ashamed to admit it!)
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I think you are right, Debby.
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As someone that loves photography, I can honestly say I’ve done a few of these items on your list, John. And multiple times. Appreciate the advice!
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I’m right there with you, Mar.
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I must admit, I’m guilty of #7. I mean way guilty.
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We always fall in love with a scene to photograph and think we have to photo it more than once.
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