The words on the coffee maker’s touchscreen are a jumble of disassociated letters. It appears as if the machine is having some kind of breakdown. My only thought is to reboot it and see if there is any improvement. The plug is pulled, and an almost imperceptible sigh is released deep inside the black box. Inserting the plug in the outlet brings the machine back to life. The words “Thank you” pop onto the screen briefly before the menu appears normally.
Being reminded of Gilda Radner’s SNL bit about Rosanne Rosanna Danna’s mantra of, “If it’s not one thing, it’s another. It’s always something,” the eight-ounce coffee selection is made. The first sip is heaven and a reminder to call the machine feelings doctor and get an appointment for an examination. The second sip is covered by the Westminster Chime cacophony of the doorbell. A quick toss of a chew toy into the soundproof room and a slam of the door returns the room to silence from the bone-cracking barking of Tempeste and Twiggy.
A look at the porch camera screen confirms that a person looking very much like Mike Tyson is glaring at the camera. “What do you want?” is the message. “Delivery for J. Howell came the answer.” “Just leave it.” A low growl through the speaker convinced me I had better open the door. The security system shutdown process has begun. The SWAT team needs to be put on standby. A quick text to the leader confirms that status. Also, the flight of A-10 Warthogs must be diverted. Another call to the commander puts that worry to rest. The SEAL team needs to be called off, and a call to the leader makes that possible. The control panel makes the shutdown of the security system process simpler. The boiling oil vats are put on standby, the turret mortars disengaged, the Trebuchet on safety, the concertina wire rolled, the Claymore mines reset, the tower Gatling guns on safety, the moat net dropped, the alligators fed, the IEDs and shoulder-held rockets put away. The locks on the door are thrown. And the door opened.
“You, Howell?” “Yes.” “Sign here or I will be forced to squeeze your head like a ripe cantaloupe.”
The letter is from Linda Hill, and after I sign and make a crack about great customer service, the guy turns to leave. “What, no tip?” he says. “Cross only on green,” is my retort. I slam the door and throw the locks. I open the letter, and it reads.
Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “jumble.” Use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!
To see what others have done with the prompt, visit Linda Hill’s post. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2025/06/20/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-21-2025/
Jumble by John W. Howell © 2025
“No clock again?”
“Nope. History was a jumble of nothing going on. The only thing reported 100 years ago was a baseball game between the Ku Klux Klan of Kansas and a black semi-pro team.”
“Might have been interesting. Who won?”
“The black team.”
“Put a hole in superiority claims, I guess.”
“For sure.”
“Speaking of superior.”
“Let me guess. Time for VooDoo Rangers. Call Uber.”
“Already did. He’s right over there.”
Photo by Jan Sikes
“Okay, that makes me laugh.”
“Why? It is luxury personified.”
“Yeah, if you’re lying flat on your back in a casket.”
“Oh, come on. That’s not a hearse.”
“What do you think it is?”
“Looks like a Mardi Gras SUV.”
“Well, I can see seats, so you may be right. I’m also reminded of the Popemobile.”
“Don’t worry. No one is going to confuse you with the pope.”
“Let’s go. How do you find these things anyway?”
“I have friends in high places.”
Fiction Favorites 
That sure is one crazy car, John… Do you really have a sound proof room?
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No, not really. It is up there with the mote and oil vats.
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What a car!
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I know right? Thanks, Rabirius
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I can’t imagine why someone would order a car to look like that, but what the heck, eh?
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I can’t imagine what someone would do with it. Thanks, GP.
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Only you could manage to fit Gilda AND Tyson into your Saturday morning opening, Sheriff. Fantastic!
As for the jumble of a challenge, as long as it ends with Voodoos, all is right with the world I guess. And umm . . . the Mardi Gras SUV! Bahahahaha!
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Ha ha ha. This is what the stream of consciousness gets you. Thanks, Pilgrim
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No complaints.
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😊
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I feel like we need to know the story behind that car. It has to be a one-of-a-kind with some bizarre origin. Also, why is it always a ripe cantaloupe when being threatened? Are those easier to crush?
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They are about the size of a head and much easier than, say, a watermelon or other kind.
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Dear John
That’s the right car for an eccentric. But too long for finding a parking space in cities. On the other hand, enough space for you shopping.
We wish you a happy ride
The Fab Four of Cley
🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂
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Would need a special garage too. Wishing the F4oC a relaxing weekend.
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Oh dear, quite a big one.
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Yes indeed.
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You be stylin’ in that car, John. Maybe is has a fully stocked bar in the back. I might og out the back door with the dogs. I think Mike T. might still be waiting for that tip.
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He’s waiting for the tip for sure. I think I will plan to stay the night.
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You have an interesting security system, John, one that you might need if aliens invade. Although you might need a photon torpedo or two to truly keep them at bay.
My friend and I recently used Uber in Boston, but we never ended up in anything that remotely looked like any of your rides. I might be a bit jealous…or not!
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I do get some pretty exotic rides, Mary. I like the idea of a photon torpedo. I may have to get one of those.
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John,
You got me with the tip to Mike: “cross only on green.”
I’ll think of that all day. Funny !!
Thanks for the smile.
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Glad you liked it, Tom. Thanks for letting me know.
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Enjoyed the need to reboot the coffee machine. I have to do that with my car too often in order to get the sound to come on in my radio. Why have a radio if it can not produce sound? Fun story and picture.
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I have had many radios that produced zero sound, so I can feel your pain.
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😆🤔😎
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That guy using a threat to get you to sign, then wanting a tip would be a temptation to flip the security system back on. That is an amazing ride.
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Or at least activate the oil vats. Thanks, Tim
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Made me laugh, too! That is a grand exit!
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Always good to laugh. 😊
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Yes, it is. 😊🙏🏻
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😊
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Oh my goodness I just spit my coffee out reading this that’s hysterical! Hey, look at the bright side you can make a cantaloupe 🍈 soup lol 😂
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That does sound like the bright side for sure, Cindy. Thanks. 😀
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always, John! 💕
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😀
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Always a jumble; now, officially so!
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Yes, it is official. Nice to see you again, Chel.
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❤️
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😊
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Nice look👌
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Thank you.
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One never knows who might be at the door! 🚪
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That is what I think. Thanks, Holly.
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Ha! Ha! Glad to see you were able to use the crazy vehicle in a post. 🙂 I cracked up at the ‘friends in high places’ comment. 🙂 Great use of the prompt!
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Thank you, Jan I’m so glad you sent that vehicle. 😊
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Such a good use of the prompt today. I just love your stories. And today I could actually hear it. That’s what you do … you paint pictures with words… Speaking pictures this time. 😄
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I like that idea, Jill. Thank you.
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Wow voodoo ranger time and the coolest uber ever. It was a good story.
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I wonder if drinking a VooDoo Ranger while laying down is a good thing?
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As long as your head is slightly raised, otherwise you can choke.
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😊
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Is that true about the baseball game?
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Yes it is.
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Thanks, John!
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You are welcome, Liz.
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Good one, John!
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Thank you, Traci
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Lots of pointy hats today. Popes, Klansmen.
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National pointy hat day.
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The jumbled letters on the coffee maker (I get those on my microwave), Gatling Gun (trying to find one for my second floor porch)–I was about to ask where you got it when you gave it away with the soundproof room for the pups. You’d never do that.
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Here’s a link where you can get one. https://brassdepot.com/product-category/firearms/gatling-gun/
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I would love one of those (yes, I’m odd). Do you think CA would approve it? I could move…
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Hand-cranked Gatling guns are legal. Sadly, they are costly.
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Didn’t know that. Hmm… My brain is … cranking…
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That car is wild!
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It is. Can’t imagine who thought it was a good idea.
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Gee, did you get an autograph? It could be M.T.! Did you cover your ears before answering? Best be safe!
I knew a lot of people can’t afford housing and live in their cars, but this is a whole new concept.
Kinda scary though…looks like one of those places you go in, but never come out. VooDoomobile …
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I like the idea of a VooDoomobile. 😊X
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🧟♀️X 🧟X 🧟♂️X
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Pathetic looking Zombies!
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Yes, they were. 😊X
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[…] Favorites: https://johnwhowell.com/2025/06/21/stream-of-consciousness-saturday-prompt-jumble/ The words on the coffee maker’s touchscreen are a jumble of disassociated letters. It appears as […]
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Thanks for the link, Traci.
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Me thinks Linda Hill needs to find a different delivery service-one that’s not so terrifyingly similar to Mike Tyson. As for that Uber ride…Italk about creative! Well done with the prompt, both visually with that vehicle as well as with your prose, John.
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Thank you, Monika. I certainly enjoy putting together my silly view of things. 😀
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Glad you didn’t get your head squeezed like a cantelope. I must say the Uber does resemble a hearse, or Mardi Gras SUV, or a Popemobile. What a great ride!
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I’ll bet the bar and sound system are terrific. 😀
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Oh yes!
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Ha ha ha.
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😅
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