Author: John W. Howell

I have been working in business for over forty years and now have the time to work in special areas of interest. My passion has always been to create compelling stories of fiction. I have authored six novels and am working on my Seventh. The first novel is still in manuscript form and being utilized as a door stop in the laundry room. The second is a contemporary fiction novel of 89,000 words and is complete and I am currently seeking a publisher. I also write poetry but have not had the guts to share any with anyone. The one time I read a piece to a person their only comment was, “it doesn’t rhyme.” I will continue to write and hopefully my blog, Fiction Favorites at www.johnwhowell.com will provide some entertainment and an interesting thought or two. I live in the Austin area with my wife Molly and an assortment of loving pets.

Top Ten Things Not to Do on a Road Trip

May 15, 2023May 14, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 81 Comments

This post ran on February 20th, 2017. Since folks still take road trips, it might still be useful. I hope you enjoy it.

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The inspiration for this list came with President’s Day weekend. A lot of people are on road trips, and at least maybe they will read this before heading back home today. I always look back fondly on those road trips so many years ago.

Top Ten Things Not to Do on a Road Trip

10 On a road trip, do not let the kids claim their own space in the back. If you do, at best, the territory claims will be endless. At worst, you’ll have to separate them and sit with your knees under your chin. (You forgot about the hump, huh, Bunky?)

9 On a road trip, do not start the 100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall song. If you do, at best, everyone will get tired after ten. At worst, one of the kids will insist on going the whole distance. (How’s that toothache doing, Ferd?)

8 On a road trip, do not miss stating all the rules of I Spy. If you do, at best, a small loophole will allow multiple winners. At worst, forgetting the “in the car” rule means little princess will hold out for 100 miles before declaring her item was a bird on the wire. (Yes, Tex. It was the bird 100 miles back.)

7 On a road trip, do not allow anyone into Buck-ees without a pre-set budget. If you do, at best, you can justify the expense with the bonus points on the credit card. At worst, the manager of Buck-ees wants to sell your car to cover the bill. (What kind of rest stop has diamond-covered boots, huh, Pilgrim?)

6 On a road trip, do not think every tunnel is short enough to hold your breath all the way to the end. If you do, at best, you’ll hit a long one and will have to breathe. At worst, little Tiny, the future WWF champ who is a great competitor, will be blue by the time you emerge. (No one told him to give up, Buster.)

5 On a road trip, if you are the driver, do not hold up your feet over the railroad tracks. If you do, at best, you won’t have a close call. At worst, you might be caught short if you need to make a quick stop. (Is that semi in your lane, Buford?)

4 On a road trip, do not set unreasonable expectations around the number of license plates needed to be spotted to finish the game. If you do, at best, everyone will be discouraged and quit. At worst, your most competitive child will keep going until they have all fifty. (Good luck on that Hawaii plate, Pal.)

3 On a road trip, do not allow the kids to pick their own snacks. If you do, at best, you’ll need to run the car through a car wash when you get home. At worst, you will be peeling the kids off the ceiling after the mega sugar high hits. (You enjoy the screaming too, don’t you, Slick?)

2 On a road trip, do not let anyone in the car read the Stuckey’s signs. If you do, at best, you’ll have to stop every hundred miles. At worst, you’ll have so many log rolls, divinities, and clusters you will be able to open your own store. ( Not to mention the dentist bill, right Ralph?)

1 On a road trip, do not insist that everyone hold it until the gas stop. If you do, at best, the last ten miles will be very tense. At worst, you might be on the receiving end of a family mutiny. (You never realized how strong those kids are, did you, Jake?)

Views of the Neighborhood – Yard Decorations

May 14, 2023May 13, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 99 Comments

Happy Mother’s Day

I have to admit it is a slow week in the neighborhood. The Producer did see some unusual yard decorations, so that is what the tour is all about today. We are being catered by Ten Ten of Austin. Our entertainment is The Yardbirds. (Of course)

Grilled squash, black garlic, baby spinach.

Charred hamachi kama black garlic, pickled vegetables

Sea bass miso butter, bok choy

Pork belly ssamjang, baby lettuce, pickles

Short rib Japanese bbq, shimeji

Wagyu new york strip summer squash, shiso

A5 wagyu tenderloin hatcho miso, 8oz

A5 wagyu strip shiso wasabi gremolata 14oz

A5 wagyu ribeye veal truffle demi-glace 24oz

Picture of an old time school bus

The bus is ready.

We start with a dinosaur and a frog character. (Sorry for the fuzzy photo, but it had to be taken from a distance.

A slightly tilted wind sculpture.

A full-blown windmill.

Mushrooms and lights.

A very strange headless monk. (I think monk.)

One of the more weird yard decorations. When the wind blows, there is an illusion of motion.

Another wind sculpture and some steel flowers at its base.

A glass something sitting among rocks.

Totally weird. Our favorite purple house now has aliens. Two kid aliens are taking a nap on the ground.

Back to normal. Steel sunflowers. (Yeah, they are normal)

That is the tour. I hope you have a great week. now enjoy the food and music.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – “Starts with Over”

May 13, 2023May 12, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 80 Comments

The new coffee machine is installed, and one button push produces a perfect cup of soothing coffee bean juice. No more begging for performance. No more waiting for relief. This machine is a new generation and seems to be built without attitude. Taking a sip of the gift of the gods sets my brain into motion. Instantaneously my phone rings, and an “unknown caller” warning flashes on the screen.

Since the kidnappers of Roger Rabbit said they would call, against my better judgment, the call is taken. A computerized voice warned me not to call the police and to follow their instructions to the letter. They overemphasized the fact that the statue would not survive any police involvement. They finalized the call with two demands. The first is a drop off of unmarked bills totaling $100,000 to a location they will identify later.

The second is a message from Linda Hill. (I swear Linda knows everyone) The message is “Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “starts with over.” Find a word that starts with “over” and use it for your prompt. Enjoy!” After delivering the message, the phone went silent.

To join the fun, visit Linda’s blog and read how. You can also see other responses to the prompt. Here is the link https://lindaghill.com/2023/05/12/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-may-13-2023/

“Pretty short intro.”

“Well, as they say, ‘short and sweet.'”

“I think that is an oversimplification.”

“How so?”

“Well, we had no security shutdown. There were no characters. A new box on the porch would have been good. I was thinking you could work Helen Crump into an episode.”

“Helen Crump? Who the heck is Helen Crump?”

“She was Andy Taylor’s school teacher girlfriend on the Mayberry sitcom.”

“How do you remember that stuff?”

“I have an overseer named Dan. He sends suggestions to pass to you.”

“So no, we had no Helen Crump.”

“How do you suppose the kidnappers got a message from Linda Hill?”

“Does this blog look like a place that has logical answers?”

“I guess that’s a no-comment, right?”

“You have guessed correctly. Speaking of over.”

“Who was speaking of over?”

“The prompt.”

“Yes?”

“How about we get overserved?”

“Overwhelmingly good suggestion.”

“Summon Uber.”

“In progress. Hey, there he is.”

“In that Willy’s Overlander with no top.”

“Complain, complain, complain.”

Friday JohnKu – AKA – TGIF – Fri-Yay Good News

May 12, 2023May 11, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 74 Comments

White’s seahorse released in Australia – Supplied by Dr. David Harasti

Today’s good news story comes from my favorite source, the Good News Network. Here is the story.

‘Best One We’ve Ever Done’–Scientists Release Hundreds of Endangered Seahorses Back Into the Wild

Andy Corbley May 11, 2023

Marine biologists restoring populations of seahorses off Australia’s east coast are ecstatic at the best efforts they’ve seen so far.

Hundreds of White’s seahorses, the only seahorse or seadragon species on Australia’s national endangered species list, were released into the waters north of Newcastle into specially-made “hotels.”

The project was conducted through a private-public effort consisting of the Sydney Aquarium and the Department of Primary Industries, (DPI) an agency that oversees hunting, agriculture, fishing, and forestry.

A generation ago, divers might see two dozen White’s seahorses at a time off Sydney Harbor at a refuge called Port Stephens, but coastal development and boat moorings have disrupted the habitat of these beautiful and strange creatures.

Sydney Aquarium has a very successful breeding program for the animal that uses individuals from Port Stephens as broodstock. The fathers raise the eggs of the next generation in a belly pouch—a feature unique in the entire animal kingdom—and are collected in large bags of seawater after they hatch.

They are then taken to the refuges and lowered down into their hotels. The hotels are essentially cages meant for much larger animals. They create plenty of nooks and crannies that serve as habitats for them and their prey species, like crustaceans.

Recently, aboard a DPI boat off Nelson Bay, Dr. David Harasti, a scientist with the department, released 350 baby seahorses at one time.

The seahorse “hotels” – Dr. David Harasti

“That was the best one we’ve ever done—350 baby seahorses sitting around in their new home,” he told ABC au, who filmed him doing the release.

“It’s great to see, and I can’t wait to go back in a couple of weeks and see how they’re doing.”

Harasti is also planning to check up on his charges this coming October.

The good news here is that with work, endangered species can be saved. Today’s JohnKu talks about what saving endangered species means to us. I hope you have a wonderful weekend.

Vanishing Species,

Are the early warning signs . . .

For the rest of us.

Thursday – A Little Personal – Twiggy and Lucy Juggle a Big Problem

May 11, 2023May 9, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 113 Comments

“So, what is the big problem you wanted to discuss, Little One?”

“I’m thinking of changing my predator character.”

“Okay. I don’t see that as a problem. You can be what you want.”

“Yeah, but. I have invested a lot of time developing the Puma character.”

“What character did you have in mind?”

“I was thinking of something along the lines of a wolf.”

“Along the lines? Why not just choose to be a wolf and be done with it.”

“Well, you see, there are various kinds of wolves.”

“I get that. They are not all that different.”

“But you have to be comfortable with the kind I choose.”

“To the Wildebeest, a predator is a predator. Still scary.”

“I want you to be comfortable with my choice.”

“Oh,, I’m sure anything you choose will be fine.”

“It may take me some time to figure this out.”

“Take your time. You and I aren’t going anywhere.”

“There is one wolf, in particular, I’m leaning towards.”

“Oh yeah? Which one is that?”

“Ware wolf.”

“OMG.”

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Finger point Prompt – Curls

May 9, 2023May 8, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 69 Comments

The idea is to randomly open a book and, without looking, point to a page. The word or words closest to your pointing figure becomes the prompt. Today we opened The Last Drive to page 31, and the word nearest my finger is “curls.”

Thinking hard today has been difficult. I’m not sure if it is the high humidity or some kind of star alignment. In any case, when I opened my eyes and looked at the word “curls” near my finger, my mind froze. This is not just the momentary fleeting freeze usually associated with panic. No, this is the garden hose washing all the chalk off the driveway kind of freeze. A blank slate of emptiness freeze. (Final metaphor) It is an empty canyon with three echos freeze. In short, I had nothing.

Usually, taking a quick walk around can be done to thaw the mind. So after a three-mile bike ride, the feeling returns to the old mind. So now, let’s talk about curls.

I think the best way to handle the prompt is to tell a little story.

Once upon a time, there was a very strong man. He would work out in the gym building his muscles. He would do curls with heavy weights to develop his arms. His legs were strengthened by running and more weight work. All this exercise had one objective: to allow him to ride the curls of waves with his surfboard. He loved his surfboard and would spend hours waxing it and admiring the curls in the wood. One day while he was sitting on the beach, he couldn’t help but notice a fellow surfer riding the waves. She placed herself on the front of her board, allowing her toes to make curls over the leading edge. The effect was increased speed and control. When she finished and was making her way to the beach, he decided he needed to talk to her about the style she used. Getting closer, he noticed her wet hair hung in curls and framed her beautiful smile. He greeted her with a grin and an upbeat good morning. The two chatted and found much in common and spent the rest of the day together until the dusk curls of the clouds indicated that the day was done.

Well, that is it. But, yes, they developed a relationship and now live in Santa Monica, California, with their two kids and a dog.

I hope you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading.

Top Ten Things Not to Do at a Wine Tasting

May 8, 2023May 7, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 83 Comments

This post first ran on January 16th, 2017. Since wine tastings are still happening, I think it is still relevant. I hope you enjoy it.

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The inspiration for this list is attending some wine-tasting events in my time. The Producer worked as a marketing person for a winery in Northern California and was required to taste wine every week. Of course, she was a professional and would delight in witnessing some of the events listed. Since I was well-schooled by her, I never made these faux pas. (I would have died on the spot if I had.) I hope you enjoy it.

10 If you are attending a wine tasting, do not insist on special glasses to claim to have a whole tasting experience. If you do, at best, the rest of the gathering will take you for an idiot. At worst, the host will produce special glasses, and then you will be on the spot to render a scholarly opinion. (Up to tonight, your experience has been Boon’s Farm Apple Red, right, Buford?)

9 If you are attending a wine tasting, do not throw back the wine as if it is a shot of tequila. If you do, at best, your drink preference and sophistication will show through. At worst, you will find yourself all alone as the discussion turns to the merits of the wine. (No one cares what you think about wine and probably thinks your chewing tobacco will get in the way of an honest opinion anyway, Tex.)

8 If you are attending a wine tasting, don’t forget the crackers are to cleanse the palette, not a meal. If you do, at best, the host will move them away from you. At worst, you might be subtly offered a place in the kitchen where the host promises a bucket of fried chicken and a six-pack of Keystone Light. (You think that offer might not be so bad until you see the look on your spouse’s face huh, Bunky?)

7 If you are attending a wine tasting, do not start describing the various flavors of the wine unless you know what you are talking about. If you do, at best, you will get polite nods at your incredible ignorance. At worst, someone will ask the host to send you to the store for more crackers. (You will find out coal oil is not a legitimate taste on the flavor wheel, Buster.)

6 If you are attending a wine tasting, do not try to sneak Two-Buck Chuck in a brown bag into the line-up. If you do, at best, the host security system video will show your placement of the bottle. At worst, one of the wine snobs will involuntarily spew the wine on Tiny, the WWF champ. (Right now, Tiny is going from guest to guest demanding to know who brought the wine. You have always been a lousy liar, and your turn is next, right, Weenie?)

5 If you are attending a wine tasting, do not forget you are not supposed to swallow the wine. If you do, at best, you will need a ride home. At worst, you will decide to inform all the guests what you think of each personally, identifying what you consider a flaw in their personality needing correction. (The next morning will be a beauty, especially when you learn what you called your boss.)

4 If you are attending a wine tasting, it is best not to wear a white shirt. If you forget, at best, you are very careful and escape embarrassment. At worst, someone asks a question and surprises you just as you raise the glass to your lips. (Maybe that shirt will make a nice car wax rag or a tie-dye coverup.)

3 If you are attending a wine tasting, do not over-swirl your wine. If you do at best, your glass will be big enough to keep the wine under control. At worst, your red wine swirl will go outside the glass, and land on the white linen couch the host just explained was made to order and arrived this afternoon. (Make no mistake, you are now the proud owner of that couch, Cowboy.)

2 If you are attending a wine tasting, do not ask for ice for your wine. If you do, at best, your host will take your wine. At worst, your host will ask you to go to the convenience store to pick up a twenty-pound bag. (It is hoped that the tasting is over before you can return, Slick.)

1 If you are attending a wine tasting, try not to argue with experts about the quality of a particular wine. If you do, at best, even if you are right, you will look particularly brutish. At worst, one of the experts just got his graduation certificate from the anger management course mandated by the courts after being arrested for assaulting a wine steward at a restaurant for disagreeing with him on wine quality. (Looks like a knuckle sandwich is on the menu, Pal.)

Views of the Neighborhood – May the Fourth be with You

May 7, 2023May 7, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 53 Comments

The Lakeway Parks and Recreation had initially planned an event for May 4th featuring a movie showing Star Wars; The Rise of Skywalker. Unfortunately, there was the threat of thunderstorms, so the event was moved to the 5th. We can still go back and participate through the magic of time travel. Here is the poster for the event.

We are catered by

Picture of an old time school bus

So let’s go.

We are in the right place. The big screen is set up.

Folks are gathering

The Craigo’s truck is here with free pizza.

The popcorn is ready to go.

A storm Trooper looks like he’s ready for all comers.

Here is a brave warrior taking him on with a laser sword.

The kids are ready for laser tag, as is Din Djarin.

Fun for everyone.

“May the Force be with You.”

Let’s have some pizza and enjoy the movie. I hope you have a good week.

Here is a trailer.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – Childhood Song

May 6, 2023May 5, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 60 Comments

The coffee machine has finally come to an end. Reminds me of the song we sang in the schoolyard. “Ring around a Rosie. Pocket full of posies. All fall down.” Since that song was inspired by the bubonic plague, it seems fitting in this situation. The machine has given up the ghost and must be replaced. The new one is on its way, but until it arrives, it must be jiggered to override the internal controls. With much jiggering, a cup comes at last.

The first sip brings to mind the statue of Roger Rabbit. A deep sigh follows the thought of having to get rid of it. The first task is to see if it is still there. A check of the ring doorbell on my phone shows it is no longer on the drive. To confirm the security shutdown process is begun. The claymore mines disarmed. The tower machine guns are placed on standby. The boiling oil vat is secured. The moat net retracted. The concertina wire rolled back. The trebuchet was secured. The gate lifted. The locks and deadbolts reset. The front door opened.

Looking at where the statue used to be confirms it is gone. In its place is an envelope. Tearing it open, there are two messages. The first is from someone who signs their name, The Phantom. It reads No Police. If you want to see your stature again, you’ll follow our directions. We will be in touch.

I hope the would-be kidnappers are happy with their statue since there is no reason to respond to any demands. The second message is from Linda Hill. It reads. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “a song from your childhood.” So think of a song from your childhood and just write. Have fun!

If you would like to have fun, visit Linda’s blog and read how easy it will be. You can also see other prompt responses. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2023/05/05/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-may-6-2023/

“So you did ring around the Rosie?”

“Kinda morbid, wasn’t it?”

“Ever lose a coffee machine?”

“Can’t say that I have. I would have picked London Bridges’ Falling Down.”

“Why that one?”

“Well, the machine has taken a fall, and I thought that would be more appropriate.”

“It would work well too.”

“So what about that statue?”

“I think I’ll just ignore the kidnappers when they contact me.”

“You think that’s wise?”

“Why not?”

“They might be gang members and come after you.”

“Over that stupid statue?”

“Well, they want money.”

“Yeah, I didn’t think of that. I’ll find out what they want, but I sure do not want the statue back.”

“I get that. Do you remember the song, “Nick knack paddy whack?”‘

“‘Give the dog a bone.” Sure, I remember.”

‘”This old man came rolling home.” Remind you of anything?”

“Help me.”

“A few too many VooDoo Rangers.”

“Of course. Punch up, Uber.”

“You are the best.”

“I guess that means I’m buying.”

“So kind to offer. There’s our ride.”

Friday JohnKu – AKA – TGIF – Fri-Yay Good News

May 5, 2023May 4, 2023 ~ John W. Howell ~ 100 Comments

Credit Courtesy Finbarr FallonBjarke Ingels Group

Happy Cinco de Mayo. Today’s good news story comes from the Good News Network.

Skyscraper Bursting with 80,000 Plants Opens in Singapore

Andy Corbley May 4, 2023

If you’re planning a trip to the other side of the world’s richest city-state, Singapore’s “biophilic” CapitaSpring tower is now fully bursting with a publically accessible urban forest.

In Singapore’s business district, you have to go 17 to 20 stories above street level to find vast open greenery. On CapitaSpring’s “Green Oasis” floor, accessible to the public, a spiral path winds through gardens and small replicants of tropical forests, like the kind that stood there before Singapore came to be.

On the roof, three rooftop market gardens supply fruits, vegetables, herbs, and flowers to three on-site restaurants, and trees grow in nooks in the building’s facade as often as windows.

Ground broke in 2018 under the supervision of two of Europe’s most significant architecture firms—Carlo Ratti Associati and the Bjarke-Ingels Group.

“Due to the unique character of Singapore’s urbanism—both extremely dense and green—we decided to make the design a vertical exploration of tropical urbanism,” founder Bjarke Ingels said in a statement, adding that the tower is “like a vision of a future in which city and countryside, culture and nature can coexist.”

The 51-story building houses over 80,000 trees and plants across 90,000 square feet of landscaped area.

It reflects the belief of the nation’s founder, Lee Kuan Yew, who referred to the city-state as a “garden city.” Despite 6 million people filling an area smaller than Greater London, plants are easy to come by and are, in fact, a legal requirement in building regs.

The good news here is that if an effort is made in Singapore to ensure a dense Uban area has a proliferation of plants, such an effort can happen anywhere. Today’s JohnKu talks about creativity in urban planning. I hope you have a wonderful weekend.

Alabaster lights,

Gleem on the city walkways . . .

Could accent the green.