Author: John W. Howell

I have been working in business for over forty years and now have the time to work in special areas of interest. My passion has always been to create compelling stories of fiction. I have authored six novels and am working on my Seventh. The first novel is still in manuscript form and being utilized as a door stop in the laundry room. The second is a contemporary fiction novel of 89,000 words and is complete and I am currently seeking a publisher. I also write poetry but have not had the guts to share any with anyone. The one time I read a piece to a person their only comment was, “it doesn’t rhyme.” I will continue to write and hopefully my blog, Fiction Favorites at www.johnwhowell.com will provide some entertainment and an interesting thought or two. I live in the Austin area with my wife Molly and an assortment of loving pets.

Tuesday Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #163 by Keith Channing

~ John W. Howell ~ 65 Comments

In Keith’s words. “Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here – pingbacks don’t often work.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, next Monday.”

The photo.

Kreative Kue #163

Das Machine by John W. Howell © 2018

“SICWK 302 calling base.”

“Go ahead 302.”

“I have made a safe touchdown and am now active.”

“We copy that 302. We are receiving an image now.”

“I hope to be able to explain it, base.”

“Yeah. The monitors are showing a carbon unit.”

“Copy that, base. It looks to me like one of the life forms on this planet.”

“Can you tell if it is an intelligent life form? ”

“It hasn’t moved in quite a while. It does have unusual facial features. It almost looks like it is trying to determine something.”

“What form did you elect to take?”

“They have something here called an ATM. There were so many I decided to take that form.”

“What is the purpose of this ATM?”

“It is a reservoir for paper.”

“Paper?”

“Yes. My sensors determined that this planet has little pieces of a compound of fibers that the inhabitants use as currency to barter for goods and services.”

“You sound like you know a lot about it.”

“They also have an intelligent being here called Google. This Google knows everything. I believe it is the repository for all knowledge.”

“Well thank the planets you have help. Has the life form moved?”

“No. It is still staring at something on my face.”

“What is on your face?”

“I had to replicate a screen. It gives instructions on how to use the ATM.”

“Why is the life form staring then?”

“Maybe there is a language problem.”

“What language did you use.”

“Ours of course.”

“Um, 302?”

“Yes, base.”

“What are the odds a life form on a distant planet will be able to decipher Scrungy?”

“Google said Scrungys are everywhere. This thing still hasn’t moved. Maybe it is not viable any longer.”

“I’m so glad we sent you on this important mission 302.”

“Why, thank you.”

“Sure,”

Top Ten Things Not to Do at the Academy Awards

~ John W. Howell ~ 58 Comments

Oscars

 

The inspiration for this list is the fact that the Academy Awards are next Sunday and I’m sure you are all going as a guest of the Academy of Motion Picture  Arts and Sciences.  I feel it is my duty to give you some pointers so that you don’t come away from the awards regretting your attendance.

10 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not try to get out of your limo before the driver opens your door. If you do, at best you might hit the driver with the swinging door. At worst, there will be a mechanical malfunction, and the driver will be forced to leave the red carpet area with you still in the car. (Pounding on the glass only adds to the chaos, Dev.)

9 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not try to walk by Tiny the WWF champ who has been given the assignment of checking all invitations for authenticity. If you do, at best you might be clotheslined by Tiny’s massive arm. At worst, Tiny has been warned once already not to let any party crashes in, so he elects to give you his best body slam to slow you down. (Don’t worry Devereaux, your breath will come back once that EMT puts the oxygen mask on.)

8 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not think dancing the Stroll on the red carpet is a good idea. If you do, at best the network reporters will pretend to be busy with someone else. At worst, you will snag your shoe in a wrinkle and go down like a Mosler Safe falling off the twelfth floor. (Yes it was caught on network TV, Devion. Yes, they got your name right. Yes, the moment is being replayed with a laugh track. No, there is not an agent who will touch you.)

7 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not complain loudly about how far away your seat is from the event. If you do, at best the room will wonder who elected you king. At worst, the committee head in charge of guest invitations will quietly ask you to leave while the two big goons drag you toes down to the ally. (You just broke the record for the shortest time as a guest, Diarmaid. You should be proud.)

6 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not whistle and stomp when your favorite actor wins best performance. If you do, at best the ushers will ask you to stop it. At worst, those around you will take law and order into their own hands. (Hard to make noise with that cumberbund tied firmly around your head isn’t it, Dima?)

5 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not think the bottles of wine are for you exclusively. If you do, at best a waiter will remind you. At worst, you will have to fight your tablemates all of which are stunt doubles. (Those people are healthy aren’t they, Dimochka?  You might get the feeling back in your arm by Tuesday.)

4 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not ask the person next to you if they are going to eat their lobster chunks. If you do, at best they’ll leave. At worst you will find out shortly that the person next to you is a black belt special warfare instructor. (Wow, that throat chop indeed stopped you from wanting lobster hey, Dionysius?)

3 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not take the centerpiece. If you do, at best a security person will take it from you. At worst, you’ll  make it to the pickup area and then be arrested on National TV for grand larceny. (You always take the centerpiece right, Dohasan?  Well not this time.)

2 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not do your special dance at the Governor’s Ball. If you do, at best the orchestra will suddenly take a break. At worst, the videos of you dancing will go viral with the caption, “Partygoer who is out of control.” This will do wonders for book sales, Donatello.)

1 If you are attending the Academy Awards as a guest, do not corner your favorite actor, playwright or author. If you do at best, you’ll get a cold shoulder. At worst, a gang of security people will wrestle you to the floor and hold you there for the police. (Why is that camera person continuing to film this travesty of justice, Donavon? Maybe if you stop yelling obscenities they may finish as well.)

Views of the Neighborhood – Whooping Crane Festival

~ John W. Howell ~ 55 Comments

Here is a description of the festival taken from http://www.whoopingcranefestival.org. You can visit the site for information on events.

This festival in its 22nd year is a one of a kind event, focused on the Whooping Crane, the rarest of cranes and one of the most endangered birds in the world.

The Whooping Crane population is at a record high –an estimated 431 cranes wintered at the Aransas National Wildlife Refuge last year. This summer, a record 63 Whooping Crane chicks fledged on the cranes’ breeding grounds at Wood Buffalo National Park in Canada. The Whooping Crane Festival celebrates the annual return of the cranes to their wintering habitat. The Texas Coastal Bend is the only place where you can see the world’s last naturally occurring population of Whooping Cranes.

World-renowned crane expert, Dr. George Archibald, Co-Founder of the International Crane Foundation, will be one of the featured speakers, along with representatives from Wood Buffalo National Park, Operation Migration, the Aransas National Wildlife Refuge, and more. Festival activities include boat tours to view the Whooping Cranes, interactive workshops and seminars, birding and nature boat and bus tours, a painting and wine tasting class and a free nature-related trade show.

A whooping Crane

 

Visitors from all over the country come to Port Aransas for the festival

The registration desk with a hanging quilt depicting the T-shirts from 20 festivals.

This year’s shirt

The Whooping Crane chicks are hatched in Wood Buffalo National Park in Canada.

Representatives of the International Crane Foundation

Information on the Estuaries program and how to keep the Gulf beautiful.

An overall shot of the room. There were just too many booths to feature here. There were gifts, art, jewelry and more.

The famous King Ranch was represented offering birding tours.

Information for birders on the Rio Grande Valley Birding Festival.

The Port Aransas Animal Rehabilitation Keep was well represented.

Need binoculars?

Fisherman’s Wharf is represented offering tours to the Aransas National Wildlife Refuge, home of the Whooping Cranes. This is a model of the Wharf Cat, the boat used for the trip.

If you blow up this photo, you can see which birds have been spotted so far.

A picture of the Wharf Cat and bird enthusiasts waiting to board for the tour.

Another shot

Whooping Crane Festival

The captain surveying the landlubbers.

Whooping Crane Festival

Another event that is part of the Whooping Crane Festival is the Wine and Art workshop at the Arts Center

There are wine and snacks too.

Everyone works on their individual rendering of the same piece. Here an artist is drying the background to get ready for the foreground.

Did I mention there was wine?

The artist instructor is demonstrating the application of the foreground.

Here is what each participants piece will look like.

I hope you enjoyed the walk around. It was good to see everyone enjoying themselves.

 

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Door”

~ John W. Howell ~ 43 Comments

 

Stream of Consciousness

It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday again and this weeks prompt is “door.” Now just having the word “door” as a prompt would be a little mundane, so Linda Hill kicked it up a notch. She requires “door” to be used in a specific context, which is, a door we have walked through that isn’t our own THIS WEEK. If you would like to join in on this fun go to Linda’s site and read how. Here is the link if you dare.

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Feb. 24/18

Not My Own Door by John W. Howell © 2018

“Why so glum, chum.”

“I hate to say this, but sometimes your alliterations come at the wrong time.”

“Oh, my. You are in a mood. You been over to Linda Hill’s place again, right?”

“How did you know?”

“Same face every time.”

“It’s cause I like the prompts and want to do well.”

“So what’s the problem?”

“You know I write all the time.”

“Yeah, I do. In fact, I think you are obsessive.”

“Save the psychological analysis for some other time. I have a real problem.”

“Okay. I’m sorry. What’s the problem?”

“Here it is. We are supposed to write about a door that isn’t our own that  we have gone through this week.”

“Sounds fun. I don’t see the issue.”

“I only went out once this week.”

“Ah, the old Howard Hughes recluse writer thingy.”

“And guess where I went?”

“A bar, restaurant, museum, or something interesting I hope.”

“That’s just it. I went to the frickin Rheumatologist.”

“What? the Rheumatologist? Oh, that is one exciting trip. How was the door there?”

“You are not helping.”

“What’s with you writers anyway? You have some kind of sun allergy?You’re all the same. To leave the house is like a major deal.”

“We get wrapped up in our work.”

“Yeah, and all your friends are in your head.”

“You are my friend. You aren’t in my head.”

“You’re kidding me right?”

“Yeah. Sorry about that. You are in my head too.”

“I think you need to find a hobby.”

“I have one.”

“Do tell.”

“Making up stories.”

“The prosecution rests your honor.”

 

 

 

Friday JohnKu – AKA – TGIF

~ John W. Howell ~ 72 Comments

Friday is here. (YAY) With the arrival of Friday starts the last project on our Hurricane Harvey reconstruction list. I am shuddering because this one will involve a lot of inconveniences, dust, and barking dogs. It is the total replacement of the floors on two levels of the house. It will require moving the furniture, lifting the baseboards, and then ripping out the previous floor. Obviously, this will need to be done while we are living here. To give you an idea of the before and after here is a photo of before.

TGIF

 

 

The reason I picked this shot is it will give you an idea of the complexity of the project. All the baseboards have to be taken off. The objects on top of furniture have to be moved to someplace. Then the furniture moved as well. In addition, the refrigerator (in the background) has to go somewhere as well. The pantry and closet (white doors) floors need to be done too. Then the floor has to be taken up and the new one installed. Finally, the baseboards have to be reinstalled, caulked and painted. This action has to be duplicated throughout the house. So when the job is finished, I’ll take a shot of this area and we’ll see how they do. The flooring is delivered and needs to rest in the house for a couple of days so it gets used to the environment. (I hope it likes us)

This week’s JohnKu talks about inconvenience. Hope you have a great weekend.

Inconvenience By John W. Howell © 2018

We must face challenge,

Even inconvenience . . .

In moving forward.

 

Thursday – A Little Personal – Lucy and Bailey Get Motivated

~ John W. Howell ~ 76 Comments

Lucy and Bailey

“Hey, Lucy. The sun is out.”

“Wa—huh. Oh, it’s you, Boss.”

“Come on let’s go outside.”

“Aw Boss. You know I’m still recovering from that teeth extravaganza.”

“How about you Bailey?”

“How about you Bailey what Pops?”

“Outside. You and me. Toss around the old tennis ball.”

“Mmm. Sounds delightful but I’ll pass.”

“Here. Take this toy. We’ll play fetch.”

“Gee Pops. Ever hear of siesta.”

“Sure, but you know I have a post tomorrow and I thought we could get some photos of a man and his dogs having a great time.”

“Hey, Lucy. You hear Pops. You in?”

“Oh yeah. I have the toy which you tucked under my paw. Now if I could only get up and take it to you, Boss.”

“Okay, you two. I can see we are going to have to spin this story in a different direction.”

“What are you doing, Pops?

“Bringing out the props.”

“There Bailey. You are now reading a magazine.”

“Pops I don’t read.”

“Doesn’t make any difference. This is fiction for heaven’s sake. Now you look at the magazine and I’ll create the storyline that you would rather read than go outside.”

“No one is going to buy that one, Pops.”

“Okay then. Here is Lucy reading all about celebrity pets.”

“Celebrity Pets? What kind of hogwash is that, Boss?”

“Oh come on. You can pretend to enjoy books on pets. In my story, you are going to ask how come you can’t have a pet?”

“A pet? I don’t want a pet unless it is stuffed with peanut butter.”

Lucy and Bailey

“Okay, Boss. We get it. Outside it is. This is more like it huh, Bailey?”

Bailey

“You can say that again, Lucy. I have to wonder why we fight this?”

“Maybe cause it is the Boss’ idea.”

“Good point.”

 

 

Wednesday Story Day – AKA – Hump Day

~ John W. Howell ~ 55 Comments

Hump day

 

It is Wednesday Story Day again, and last week we were present at a discussion Sheriff Seth Gibson and the Private eye Frank Plano. According to the Sheriff, he left the Severides house before they were killed. He denied killing them. We also got some information on why the sheriff thinks Lucas’ story about what happened the night of the Severide’s murder is not the whole truth. Most of us doubt the sheriff’s motivations since he seems focused on proving Lucas as the murderer. Well, I see the sheriff and Frank are continuing to talk, so I guess the coffee break is over for now.

“You say you didn’t kill them, sheriff but Alice says you were there and can’t tell me when you left. I could argue that your story is a matter of who do you believe.”
“You have to be kidding me. Alice was so looped in those days I doubt she could even remember seeing me there. Anyone else see me?”
“No. Mrs. Murphy was there but was busy taking care of Alice. Also, they left a short time after Alice said she saw you.”
“Look at the facts, Frank. Alice was a drug user. She says she saw me. Who cares? I already said I was there. When I left the Saverides were alive.”
“I still have to wonder why you’ve been, so hell-bent to get Lucas to confess.”
“For the very reasons, I pointed out. His story has holes in it that the Chief in Kenosha refuses to acknowledge. I’m a lawman, Frank. I want to see Lucas punished for his crime.”
“If he is guilty I would like the same. You have to realize this whole case is not within your jurisdiction.”
“Sadly I know that. This is why I need Lucas to confess. None of the idiots in Kenosha are going to do anything.”
“There is just one more thing, Sheriff.”
“What’s that?”
“What if Lucas didn’t do it?”
“I don’t believe that.”
“But what if it is true. Do you have another suspect?”
“No. I don’t.”
“Right. I don’t think Lucas is going to confess because I don’t think he’s guilty.”
“What makes you so sure?”
“I have a suspicion about someone else.”
“Do tell.”
“I have no proof, but it shouldn’t be too hard to get it. You want to help?”
“Tell me who you suspect, and I’ll help if it makes sense.”
“Give me a day.”

Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #162 by Keith Channing

~ John W. Howell ~ 34 Comments

In Keith’s words.

“Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here – pingbacks don’t often work.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, next Monday.”

The photo.

Kreative Kue #162

“Say Cheese,” by John W. Howell © 2018

“Take the picture for heaven’s sake.”

“Whoops. Looks like the battery is dead.”

“Do you have another?”

“I think so. Let me look in my photog bag.”

“Your what?”

“It’s the bag with all my photography supplies.”

“So, do you have one?”

“Hold on. Let me see. Double-A nope. Triple-A won’t work. Ah, here it is.”

“Thank heavens. I don’t think I can stand here too much longer.”

“Have a seat then.”

“Are you kidding me? I can’t sit down.”

“Why not?”

“I’ll wrinkle this shirt and pants.”

“I hate to tell you, but the pants already have a crease.”

“Wha—? I knew that hangar was not right. Do you have an iron?”

“An iron? I barely have a battery let alone an iron.”

“Are you ready to take the picture?”

“Yes. All set. Smile please.”

“Wait. I can’t stop thinking about the crease.”

“Forget the crease already. It won’t show in the final. If it does, I’ll airbrush it out.”

“You sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure. Now say cheese.”

“Cheese.”

“Beautiful. I got it. We are done.”

“Is that auto photo going to show?”

“Yes, it will.”

“Super I want her to think I like cars.”

“Who is this picture for anyway?”

“My landlady.”

“Your landlady. You have got to be kidding me. Why a photo for your landlady?”

“She told me if I ended up in pictures my rent would be free.”

“Um, Roberto?”

“What?”

“I think she meant motion pictures. You know, Hollywood.”

“Aw, you think? Hey, do you think I could be in motion pictures?”

“Don’t know about motion pictures but there is one place you could excel.”

“Where’s that?”

“Not where but what.”

“What?”

“You could run for President.”

 

 

 

Top Ten Things Not to Do on Your Birthday When You Turn One Hundred

~ John W. Howell ~ 55 Comments

 

Ten Things Not to Do

The inspiration for this list was coming across a bunch of things to do on a birthday. I then imagined doing these things when one is older, and the Ten Things Not to Do was born. It struck me that sometimes just being with family is enough. I hope you enjoy the list and who knows? Maybe you’d enjoy doing one of these when you turn One-Hundred.

10 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not decide to have a big ole house party. If you do at best, you won’t remember it. At worst, all the folks showing up would enjoy a nap and not get down and boogie with you. (You had to know that some people just show their age more than others, Davu. Also, the noise from that ten-piece band is attracting the police.)

9 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not think going clubbing is a good idea. If you do, at best you’ll be in bed before the club opens. At worst, you’ll be stopped at the door by Tiny the WWF champ who can’t count high enough to validate your ID. (So loan him your calculator, Daylan. You know the one that you got free for joining ARRP fifty years ago.)

8 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not decide to have a scavenger hunt. If you do, at best some will forget to come back. At worst, your neighbors will become hopelessly confused by a bunch of seniors appearing to be aimlessly searching for things. (The state trooper described the scene as the zombie apocalypse and now your home is surrounded, Dayson.)

7 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not decide to have a barbecue. If you do, at best you’ll need some Kentucky fried to pull it off. At worst, your gas grill hasn’t been used since your Ninety-Fifth birthday, and no one seems to notice the uncooked food including you. (Gotta hope everyone is immune to the bubonic plague, Deavon.)

6 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not decide to take a city break to a place you’ve never been. If you do, at best you understand Uber. At worst, you will need to rely on friendly strangers to help you get back home. (Funny how those sites you thought you would remember getting there now are so unfamiliar coming back huh, Dalbert. Good thinking on the luggage tag attached to your coat.)

5 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not go on a camping trip. If you do, at best you’ll have someone to help you set up camp. At worst, the search party will take another day to reach you in that ravine. (Good thing you packed your bourbon right, Delsin?)

4 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not take a road trip. If you do,  at best your AAA card will get your 67 Dodge back home. At worst, the first bar on your list will refuse to serve you without a doctor in attendance. (So much for acting out Animal House again, Deniz. Hey, wake up Jonesie. You don’t want him to miss the fun.)

3 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not get talked into skydiving. If you do, at best the airplane won’t start. At worst, your tandem diving instructor is a twenty-something who has a severe case of sleep apnea. (It is a good thing he woke up before the landing, Dermitt.)

2 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not consider a beach party. If you do, at best you’ll be sleeping with sand for a month. At worst, your walker is hopelessly useless, and you have to rely on your son-in-law to carry you everywhere. (It wasn’t so bad in the beginning, but that soft drink sure started an endless trek huh, Derrick?)

1 If you are celebrating your One-Hundredth birthday, do not think a rock concert would be fun. If you do, at best you can modulate your hearing aid to accommodate the noise. At worst, once the fireworks start you’ll realize you forgot your emergency inhaler.(Wait. All of a sudden you have this euphoric feeling that comes from a second-hand high. This was not such a bad idea after, all, was it, Derwent?)