Tuesday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue #352 by Keith Channing

March 22, 2022March 21, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 56 Comments

In Keith’s words.

“Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm on Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next time.”

The photo

“So Eos. What do you suppose is the hold-up?”

“Beats me, Trevor. Normally it’s a matter of opening the can and plopping the stuff into the bowl.”

“I don’t think trying to do something special is the case.”

“No, that would be on a birthday. We are not having any birthdays.”

“Maybe the can opener is busted.”

“Please don’t say that. Knowing these two, if that were the case, we would all starve.”

“I can’t think of another reason.”

“We should offer to help.”

“Yeah, how’s that going to work? A couple of barks, and we’ll find ourselves outside.”

“I guess you’re right. Plus, I don’t know a thing about can openers.”

“Me either. Did you notice one thing?”

“What?”

“There is only one bowl.”

“Whoa. You’re right. Where’s the other one?”

“You and I have been sitting here the whole time. Did you see another bowl?”

“No. Now I’m really worried.”

“What does a missing bowl mean?”

“That we have to eat out of the same one.”

“Ew. I can’t do that.”

“That makes two of us.”

“So if one is missing, that means one of us doesn’t get fed.”

“Hey, wait a minute. That better not be me.”

“Oh yeah, what if it is you?”

“I’ll just have to relieve you of yours.”

“You and what army, punk?”

“Who you calling a punk, you overfed hound.”

“Calling me fat? You take that back.”

“Not in a hundred years.”

“Well, here we are, children. Sorry about the delay, but I wanted to make sure the bowls were given a nice shine today. So let’s all go outside and have a lovely dinner. Shall we?”

“Um, I guess there are two bowls.”

“I’m sorry for calling you overfed.”

“That’s okay. I have put on a few ounces.”

“So we are good?”

“As ever, my buddy. After you to the food bowls.”

“No, I insist. After you.”

Top Ten Things Not to Do if You are Going to Disneyland or Disney World

March 21, 2022March 21, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 67 Comments

This list was published on March 23, 2015, as helpful suggestions if a trip there is planned for spring break. Since this is the last week of spring break, I thought it might come in handy.

* * *

Top Ten Things Not to Do if You are Going to Disneyland or Disney World

10 If you are going to Walt’s place, do not tell the kids until you are there. If you do, at best, you will get there after what seems like an eternity. At worst, your fight has a detour to Fargo, North Dakota, because of the weather, and the snow will melt in ten days. (The kids will ask every three minutes when you are leaving. That’s only 4,800 asks.)

9 If you are going to Walt’s place, do not try to navigate the park without a guide-book. If you do, at best, a three-day visit will seem like three years of waiting. At worst, you and all the other uninformed visitors will be arriving at the same rides simultaneously only to all decide to go to a different ride at the same time and so on until you realize you haven’t ridden one ride in eight hours. (You sure have made a lot of friends, though)

8 If you are going to Walt’s place, do not think the weather will be the same in the afternoon as it is in the morning. If you do, at best, there will be a little rain you didn’t expect. At worse, you may get caught in a monsoon-like downpour or a North Pole-like cold snap, which will also be the perfect growing conduit for the flu virus you picked up on the airplane. ( No gin does not kill the flu virus.)

7 If you are going to Walt’s place, do not let your kids talk you into allowing a friend to come along. If you do, at best, they will all get along and only cost an additional five hundred dollars. At worst, after the first day, the friend is no longer speaking to your kids and insists they want to go home. ( They informed their parents you are holding them against their will. The state police and FBI are very understanding on these kinds of situations)

6 If you are going to Walt’s place, do not think the breakfast with the characters is going to be anything but a trial. If you do, at best, you will be dismayed at the lack of non-screaming picture-taking opportunities. At worst, your child will be the one who is afraid of a giant Mickey Mouse and makes a scene that is so traumatic you hear people talking about the reaction for three days. (Luckily, your child looks completely different when not screaming bloody murder)

5 If you are going to Walt’s place, do not think the cost of eating in the park will be reasonable. If you do, at best, you will discover the three meals you are used to will need to be trimmed to one and a half. At worst, you will have dinner the first night you are there and then will spend your time at the front gate with a cardboard sign that reads “Will write for food.” (Sadly, you are accompanied by 100 other parents doing the same thing)

4 If you are going to Walt’s place, do not try to make the actors break out of character. If you do, at best, you will simply be annoying for the kids. At worst, you may encounter a character like Jim Fink, king of the river, who will take great pleasure staying in character with a knuckle sandwich to your nose. (That came fast, didn’t it?)

3 If you are going to Disneyland, do not try to join the main street parade just because it looks all-American and you had one too many pops at dinner. If you do, at best, you will be sleeping in the car tonight. At worst, the parade, unfortunately, came to an abrupt end for you with fingerprinting and a drafty cell.(At least no one died as a result of your prank.)

2 If you go to Walt’s place, you cannot think the rides are for adults only. If you do, at best, your children will think you don’t know how to share. At worst, you will need to have a time out while your partner explains the purpose of going to Disneyland in the first place. (Of course, the session is in full view of the park visitors)

1 If you are going to Walt’s place do not forget the idea is to have fun. If you do, at best your family will have less of a good time. At worst, you will find your family has made up a little game of hide and seek, and you are it. After you count to one hundred, they have all disappeared, and the next time you talk to them is at the hotel through a locked door. (Fooled you they did.)

Views of the Neighborhood – Searching for Signs of Spring

March 20, 2022March 19, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 111 Comments

Today we are going to hunt down signs of spring. Since this is the first day of spring, there must be signs, so we will find them. We are being catered by the Cherrywood Coffee House in Austin to fuel our adventure. Our entertainment is The Loving Spoonful.

BENEDICT
poached eggs nestled on a toasted English muffin topped with homemade Hollandaise with choice of spinach and tomato or ham, plus one side dish

SHRIMP & GRITS
shrimp sauteed in white wine, pico de Gallo, and applewood smoked bacon

BISCUITS & GRAVY
homemade buttermilk biscuits smothered in creamy pepper gravy and sausage
add two eggs any style

STEEL-CUT OATMEAL (V)
served with raisins, walnuts, and brown sugar
add two eggs any style

HUEVOS RANCHEROS (V)
two over-easy eggs, black beans, salsa, cheese, and cilantro served on freshly fried tortillas

AMERICAN BREAKFAST
two eggs any style, hash browns, choice of toast or English muffin, and choice of bacon, sausage, or grilled ham steak

BREAKFAST QUESADILLAS
monster tortilla stuffed with bacon, egg, and cheese served with salsa and pico salad

TEXAS CHEESESTEAK SCRAMBLE
egg scramble with thinly sliced steak, onions, peppers, mushrooms, jalapenos, and American Swiss cheese. Served with hash browns on the side

VEGAN SCRAMBLE (VE)
soft tofu scramble, mushrooms, topped with avocado and served with hash browns (no butter)

CLASSIC BREAKFAST SANDWICH
eggs and cheese topped with one choice of avocado, bacon, sausage, or grilled ham
served on a wheat bun, white bun, or multigrain bread

BREAKFAST BLT SANDWICH
bacon, bibb lettuce, tomato, avocado, over medium egg, swiss cheese, light mayo on rye bread

Anything you want to drink.

There’s the bus. Let’s go.

The first stop is the garden shop. Can’t spend a lot of time here, though. Impatiens anyone?

Next are the famous Texas bluebonnets. These are the first I’ve seen.

Good ole redbuds are in bloom.

The mountain laurels and popping out.

The verbena is making itself known.

The Carolina jasmine is just starting.

A spicebush swallowtail butterfly takes off from the hibiscus.

The strawberry plant is in bloom.

The roses are budding.

Talk about hibiscus? They are going crazy.

And finally, The Producer’s herb garden. (with tomato)

I hope you enjoyed the hunt for spring. I think we found signs that it is here in central Texas. I hope it is arriving in your neck of the woods too. Have a great week. Have some food and enjoy the music.

Saturday Stream of Consciousness – Prompt – “Comp”

March 19, 2022March 18, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 96 Comments

Walking toward the coffee maker in the kitchen, a flash out of the corner of my eye caused me to look out the window into the backyard. Sure enough, something had fallen onto the turf. Not wanting to hallucinate, the decision is made to get coffee and then investigate the object.

The machine did its thing, and after several sips of the frothy caffeine-laden liquid, it was time to venture to what should be an astounding discovery. Reaching for the rear doorknob, a text message on my phone caused a momentary distraction. It was a text from the Bellagio Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas. They offer to comp a room for five nights provided; I bring bags of money to “invest.”

Setting the text aside in my mind, the problem of what landed in the yard had to be addressed. Being cautious out of fear of three-dimensional cartoon characters, the approach to the object could only be described as serpentine. Finally reaching what appears to be a pile of fabric, it occurs that this cannot be connected to cartoons and looks like a banner towed behind an airplane. Unrolling the banner took some energy and space. It was a huge message from Linda Hill. (of course) When finally unrolled, it said. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “comp.” Find a word that starts with or contains “comp” and use it in your post. Enjoy!

If you would like to enjoy, visit Linda’s blog and read how easy it is to join this group. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2022/03/18/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-19-2022/

“Where did the complicated banner come from?”

“I have no idea. I think it fell off the back of an airplane. Maybe the attachment was compromised.”

“It is a complex situation. ”

“You are unusually complimentary today.”

“I only mean that it is hard to comprehend a banner falling into the yard.”

“I think to complete the prompt, that’s the only thing that could happen.”

“I guess you are right. The action has to be compatible with the post.”

“I’m glad you can comprehend that fact.”

“Compassion is my middle name.”

“I’m worried that you would use compassion as a component of your understanding.”

“It just is one of the comprised emotions.”

“You have other companions?”

“Yeah, like compensate.”

“What do you mean, compatriot?”

“Skip the comp words, and let’s go drink. You’re buying.”

“Compulsiveness, I love it. Let’s go.”

“That’s the last one, right?”

“Completely.”

Friday JohnKu – AKA – TGIF – Fri-Yay/Good News

March 18, 2022March 17, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 74 Comments

Photo by Gayatri Malhotra on Unsplash

Here is a good news story about folks helping Ukraine hosts in need. I’m producing it here in its entirety.

People Are Booking So Many Airbnbs in Ukraine–They Raise $2M for Hosts in Need, and Never Even Check-in

Andy Corbley

–

Mar 10, 2022

From March 2nd to March 3rd, people from around the world booked 61,000 nights in Ukrainian cities via Airbnb, likely not one ever planning to check-in, or reschedule.

It’s part of a creative social media campaign to channel funds into besieged cities where something like aid drops or supply trucks can’t reach, and it has seen $1.9 million raised for Ukrainians in just those 48 hours.

In the Ukrainian capital of Kyiv, Volodymyr Bondarenko had 10 people book into his room in a single day. “This was surprising, it’s very supportive at the moment,” 36-year-old Bondarenko told CNN early Friday. “I told many of my relatives and friends that I plan to use this money to help our people who need it at this time.”

Airbnb has said it is offering temporary housing in neighboring countries to up to 100,000 Ukrainians who are fleeing. It’s also waiving guest and host fees in the country to support individuals donating.

“We are so humbled by the inspiring generosity of our community during this moment of crisis,” said Haven Thorn, a company spokesperson. He asked those willing to help by hosting Ukrainians or donating to their efforts to visit Airbnb’s website to find additional ways to support or information.

One way anyone can help is by opening their home to Ukrainian refugees as an Airbnb host, for which the company will cover you with Aircover, a one million dollar hosting insurance policy. Airbnb also partners with non-profits and charities to help contribute to the guests’ basic needs.

The hospitality service isn’t the only community-based service that is helping out. Etsy has decided to cancel the current balances owed to Etsy by all sellers in Ukraine, which includes listing fees, transaction fees, advertising fees, and more—a roughly $4 million relief package.

The good news here is people and businesses are working together to help those being brutalized by Putin and his army. Today’s JohnKu talks about the best sides of humankind. I hope you have a wonderful weekend.

It doesn’t take much,

To open your heart to others . . .

Think if you were they.

Thursday – A Little Personal – Twiggy and Lucy and a Touch of Spring

March 17, 2022March 16, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 99 Comments

What’s all this stuff, Lucy?”

“These are spring plants, Little One.”

“This one has no scent. So how are we supposed to know what it is?”

“You have to study them. That is an impatiens.”

“Funny name. It doesn’t seem in a hurry.”

“Now these I will remember. They have a smell.”

“Yes. Those are herbs, and they have a nice scent.”

Where do these things come from?”

“When it is spring, Mom goes to the plant market and buys them.”

“How come we don’t have these in the winter?”

“These plants only like warm weather. Let’s go to the patio and see if there are more.”

“Look at these. hibiscus topiary plants.”

“Coming. There is something here.”

“Your something is a weed.”

“Yeah, I remember those. This dirt smells nice.”

“You are supposed to enjoy the plant, not the dirt.”

“To each his own. Anymore around here?”

“No, I think that’s it for now. There will be more. Let’s go play.”

“What are you doing?”

“I thought you said this was spring. These leaves are like it’s fall.”

“Yes, those are live oak leaves. They come down in the spring since the tree stays green all winter.

“So we should call this spring-fall?”

“You can. You’ll be alone, though.”

“Not unusual.”

Tueday – Anything Possible – Kreative Kue # 351 by Keith Channing.

March 15, 2022March 14, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 67 Comments

In Keith’s words.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next time.”

The photo.

“Okay, sir, make yourself comfortable. We’ll be getting started shortly.”

“You the captain?”

“No, sir. I’m the first officer. The captain is getting the weather reports. Oh, wait, here she comes.”

“She? That little girl?”

“Yes, sir. Looks like she has some wildflowers too.”

“Surely you aren’t serious?”

“Yes, sir, those are wildflowers, and my name’s Ralph. Don’t call me Shirly.”

“Bad joke, Ralph. You can’t tell me that girl is flying this airplane.”

“I can put money on it, sir. She and I have logged over 4000 hours together. Best captain I ever had.”

“What makes her so special?”

“She always has peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.”

“Okay, now you are pulling my leg.”

“I think that would be considered assault by the FAA.”

“I mean, you are kidding me.”

“I never kid, sir. I have had a couple of pets but never a child.”

“Good grief. Let me off. I’m not flying with a seven-year-old in command.”

“Actually, she is five, sir.”

“Whatever. Get my bags. I’m out of here.”

“Suit yourself, sir. I’ll have someone get your bags.”

“Can’t you do it?”

“Not my paygrade.”

“The baggage guys make more than the pilots?”

“The miracle of supply chain economics. Stand outside, sir. They’ll be with you in a minute.”

“I’m never flying this airline again.”

“Good luck.”

“Why?”

“For disrupting this flight, you will be put on a no-fly list. I think you’ll be here a while.”

“What if I stay on the airplane?”

“Welcome back, sir. We will be leaving shortly.”

“Hi, little girl.”

“Captain dimples to you, sir. Buckle up, please. Here are some flowers for you.”

Top Ten Things Not to do While Attending a Home Owners Association Annual Meeting

March 14, 2022March 13, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 70 Comments

I no longer live in an area with a homeowners association. This post was published on March 9th, 2015, when I did. If you live in an HOA, maybe there is a helpful tip or two.

Top Ten Things Not to do While Attending a Home Owners Association Annual Meeting

10 If you are attending an HOA meeting, do not challenge everyone who disagrees with your point to go outside and settle things. If you do, at best, you will come off as a crackpot. At worst, several bigger neighbors may take you up on your offer. (Leading to a hurried trip to the ER.)

9 If you are attending an HOA meeting, do not tell a long-winded speaker to sit down and shut up. If you do, at best, you will appear to be a bully. At worst, the speaker may be a black belt Karate champ who will show you how he breaks cement blocks using only a head. (Yours)

8 If you are attending an HOA meeting, do not ask questions just to show how smart you are about the covenants. If you do, at best, your neighbors will make a note to avoid you at all costs. At worse, you may be appointed as the rule cop for the neighborhood that will endear you to everyone to whom you point out errors (not to mention the joy of egg on your windows)

7 If you are attending an HOA meeting, do not try to convince everyone your idea is the next best thing to whipped bread. If you do, at best, you will delay the meeting while contributing to the boredom. At worst, someone in the crowd will yell at you to shut up and sit down, which will expose them to the remedies in item nine. (They will be waiting outside to settle the deal.)

6 If you are attending an HOA meeting, do not bring your Italian sub sandwich to eat during the meeting. If you do, at best, everyone will move away from you. At worst, the biggest guy in the room will invite you to join the sandwich. (It is now in the garbage can outside.)

5 If you are attending an HOA meeting, do not get up and ask for donations for your book’s marketing fund. If you do, at best, your neighbors will think you have lost your mind. At worst, they will discover you are an author and warn their family members to stay away from you. ( Especially if they see you carrying books.)

4 If you are attending an HOA meeting, do not bring the kids. If you do,, at best, you will be distracted and lose sight of what is being voted. At worst,, your kids will see a bunch of new people and ask some potentially embarrassing questions like, “why is that man wearing hair on his head that doesn’t fit?” (True but embarrassing none the less.)

3 If you are attending an HOA meeting, do not try to pretend you haven’t forgotten a few names. If you do, at best, your charade will be transparent, and some will believe you to be an idiot. At worst, you will run out of introductory statements like “Hi there” and be forced to admit you’ve forgotten the name of your next-door neighbor. (He is the man who was kind enough to run out in the rain to help you catch your dog.)

2 If you are attending an HOA meeting, do not be the first to “second” every motion. If you do, at best,, your neighbors will think you have no friends. At worst, you may be seconding things that will cause frictions among the neighbors, and you will be seen as in favor no matter that you didn’t even hear the motion. (Don’t try to stamp out that burning brown bag on your front porch.)

1 If you are attending an HOA meeting and the President is reading the agenda, do not sigh and mumble, “Another long boring meeting.” If you do, at best, you are quickly losing a friend in the President. At worst, your outspoken comment may be shared by others, but because you said it, you will be the one who the neighbors will talk about tomorrow. (They’ll begin with the words, “Can you believe how rude he was to his wife?”)

Views of the Neighborhood – Fun Walk Run for Animals

March 13, 2022March 12, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 82 Comments

A couple of weeks ago, I indicated that a fun walk/run was supposed to take place but was canceled due to the weather. Well, last weekend the event took place, and due to the magic of photography, we can attend today.

Our event is catered by Bouldin Creek Cafe in Austin. Because of many requests, our menu today has vegan options. Our entertainment today is a look back to Janis Joplin.

Menu.

BREAKFAST PLATES TOFU SCRAMBLE
OR PASTURE RAISED EGGS

Predictable Breakfast
eggs or tofu served with a scratch-made herbed potato hash cake (GF) & choice of toast sub hash for granola or spring greens w/citrus vinaigrette

El Tipico
scrambled eggs or tofu, scratch-made herbed potato hash cake (GF), diced local tomatoes, shredded lettuce, house salsa & choice of tortillas

El Maximo same as above served with beans, avocado & cheddar-jack, or vegan cheddar

Oven Cake Breakfast (contains flour) • grilled house-made vegan blueberry cornbread served with two eggs or tofu & real maple syrup, dairy butter, or vegan butter

Garden Breakfast (GF)
eggs or tofu, with sliced local tomatoes & steamed organic baby spinach & lemon

add tortillas or toast

Zucchini & Cheese Migas •
eggs or tofu scrambled with a pepper purée, tortilla chips, zucchini, onion, spices & cheddar-jack or vegan cheddar. served with house salsa, choice of tortillas & choice of beans or fruit

The Renedict •
tofu bacon, organic baby spinach, sliced local tomatoes, topped with over-medium eggs or tofu scramble on an open-faced grilled ciabatta with vegan hollandaise sauce (contains flour) & scallions

Breakfast Scramwich
organic spinach & chili flake folded in eggs or tofu scramble. topped with basil aioli, local tomato & cheddar-jack, or vegan cheddar on toasted sourdough.

So jump on the bus.

There’s a signpost up ahead. Looks like we are entering the Fun, Run Zone.

We are here for sure. Here is the flyer announcing the event. (date change and all)

The registration and some walk runners are getting ready.

So we sign up and get a T-shirt and a Bud Light. (Just kidding)

Everyone’s getting to know each other.

More registrations and a view of the lake.

Time for a chat.

The start time is close, but we will go back to the bus and relax with food and entertainment. I hope you all have a wonderful week. Now here is one of my all-time favorite singers, Janis Joplin

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – “Trip.”

March 12, 2022March 18, 2022 ~ John W. Howell ~ 65 Comments

A leisurely Saturday is usually de rigor. There is no trip to the store purposely planned for the day. Coffee brewing and the memory of a carrot chomping bunny way in the past ensure the day’s outlook looks hopeful. With cup in hand and a check of the Ring, camera gives me the assurance that the day will go as expected. Several sips into the hot steaming stuff and an alert hits my phone. “An object has been detected on the front porch.” This is very strange since most alerts call for a person detected.

Wishing and hoping the so-called object is not a cartoon character, the unlock the front door series. Three minutes later, facing me on the porch is Pepe Le Pew holding what appears to be a black cat in advanced stages of panic. Her eyes beg for help as Pepe continues to shower her with kisses.

I smile. “How may I help you?”

Pepe takes his eyes off the cat and looks at me. “Uh-huh, monsieur. Thees lovely creature, and I have a message from Linda Hill. Can you reach into my back pocket and get it?” The cat made every effort to get away, but Pepe’s hug was secure.

The message is indeed sticking out of Pepe’s pocket. A quick snatch, and it is mine. Meanwhile, the cat manages to slip out of Pepe’s hold and makes a break for the woods. Pepe takes off after her leaving me to open the message.

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “trip.” Use it any way you’d like. Have fun! This is all it read.

If you want to have fun, visit Linda’s blog and read how easy it is. Here is the link.

/https://lindaghill.com/2022/03/11/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-12-2022/

“I don’t get these cartoon characters.”

“What’s not to get?”

“I mean, as long as you are doing these pitiful intros, why not do something exciting.”

“Like what?”

“A trip to outer space or out west even. Anything but these one-dimensional cartoons.”

“Oh, stop. Weren’t you ever a kid?”

“Yeah, but I grew up.”

“Maybe you had a bad experience with cartoons.”

“No. I’m older and have given over to older things.”