TGIF is as TGIF Does

~ John W. Howell ~ 25 Comments

 

Thank goodness it is Friday. It has been a hectic week. Right in the middle of everything my internet went down. After about two hours with the tech rep it was decided  they had network problems. Was kind of funny since they swore up and down it was something wrong with my computer. You have to wonder about service protocols when I explained that:

  1. My PC could not connect.
  2. My wife’s Apple iPad could not connect.
  3. My wife’s Apple Mac book could not connect.
  4. The Femto cell which allows us to receive wireless calls could not connect.
  5. The TV and VCR which are connected to the internet could not connect.
  6. All our iPhones could not connect.

Yet, the tech continued under the assumption the problem was with my computer. FINALLY the engineering group got on the phone and did a download and upload path test. GUESS WHAT? The @#$%^&* problem was in the network. That’s not all. In the process, the tech did a hard boot of my router and reset all the values back to default. The next day we figured out all our Apple products needed a different frequency which we had set up originally. ANOTHER HOUR ON THE PHONE. Totally frustrating.

I did have to think that no animals or children were hurt in the drama and as a result, got over the feeling of being duct taped to a phone. So here is a little Haiku to take you to the weekend:

Duct Taped to the Phone by John W. Howell ©2014

Been on hold an hour,

Internet is not working . . .

Told to visit web.

Dreams of Love by Pamela – A Review

~ John W. Howell ~ 5 Comments

dreamsoflovecover

Dreams of Love is a delicate collection of poems which will cause one to remember how it felt to love strongly. Pamela takes the reader on a journey much like attending a grand ball. There are light notes to entice the waltz and heavy notes to demand the reel. All are served up in differing tempos and style. My favorites are when Pamela lets go and gives herself free rein over the subject. She will bring tears, as well as, some moments of laugh out loud delight. This collection will be looked at again and again.

I actually took time out from a stressful few days of trying to get a couple of marketing programs up and running to read this collection of poems. I was immediately taken by the soothing aspect of the writing and the different styles. It felt good to take time away from the stress and concentrating on the thoughtful messages. The book is for those who have been in love, have fallen out of love, or who would like to be in love. In short, it is for everyone who needs soothing once in a while.

You can get both the e-book and paperback edition HERE

Hump Day is as Hump Day Does

~ John W. Howell ~ 10 Comments

 

Today is Wednesday and time for another story.  This one tells of a writer and actor going through some of the story line. Of course this is fiction, but actually served a purpose in saving $250.00 of couch time at the feelings doctor. The video is the Hump Day Camel in a public service announcement. Still funny.

Hope you enjoy.

The Character by John W. Howell ©2014

“So who’s the character supposed to be?”

“He is a lying no good son-of-a-bitch. That’s who he is supposed to be.”

“I know, but I am trying to get a real feeling for the person here. I can’t play the character unless I feel the person. You know what I mean?”

“Yeah I know all you actors have some kind of method. Is that what you are talking about?”

“No, not really. Method is an overused term. I’m just trying to get the motivation for the part.”

“Oh like you aren’t making a ton of money? Something else?”

“Now don’t be mean. You writers think our art is so easy since we make it look easy. We take some half backed character you dream up and put real life into your cardboard cutout. We round the character with our own interpretation of behaviors.”

“Yeah I can see that. You take the limp outline which I put on paper then you add some action, scenery and color and voila, a perfect performance.”

“I think you are getting a little carried away. You sound like I am saying acting is more important than writing.”

“Aren’t you?”

“No. I’m just saying without actors the written characterizations mean nothing.”

“Okay how’s this? Your character sometimes gets into a deep depression from having to work with real idiots. He tries to work through his depression by engaging in acts of violence targeted to those who cause him to become depressed in the first place.”

“Oh I like it. A dark character. Does he wear black?”

“Yes he does and in addition, when he is stalking his prey, he puts on black skin-tight gloves.”

“Much like the ones you are putting on?”

“Yes very much like. Then he lays in wait for the fool to make an appearance.”

“Does he have a gun?”

“No, no, no, he uses a long stiletto like this one right here.  He grabs the victim from behind and with one quick draw of the knife he severs the jugular and laughs as the sucker dies. Wanna see?”

“Um . . . you are making me feel uncomfortable. Maybe we should call it a day.”

“Oh yeah. Let’s call it a day. In fact, let’s just say you call it . . . and make my day.”

Inspiration is as Inspiration Does – Where Does a Plot Originate Anyway?

~ John W. Howell ~ 10 Comments

lex 4my grl

Picture of the USS Lexington CV 16 taken March 1944

As I have indicated before Madi Preda of Author’s promotion put together an interesting set of questions for the author interview which is HERE.  The one which caused me to do a complete retrospective on how I actually constructed the story of My GRL was simple enough on the surface: “What sparked the idea of My GRL? In a few words what is the book about?” When I started to concentrate on supplying the answer a whole range of thoughts came into my head. I finally put some organization around them and was able to answer the question. (Short and sweet) Here is a little more background on how the story took shape.

My GRL was not an idea born of concentrated thoughts on any particular subject. The germ of the story was generated when I visited the aircraft carrier Lexington which is moored in Corpus Christi bay. You see, my dad was a naval aviator and served aboard the Lexington during World War II. He was part of the dive bombing squadron taking part in the invasion of Iwo Jima,  the sinking of the Japanese Battle Ship Yamato and strikes on the Japanese homeland. Since my dad passed away when I was ten, I was very interested in visiting a place where he served. He was not a direct casualty of the war but died five years later.

It is not often families can be part of the space where loved ones fought to preserve the liberty we enjoy today. The last battles on American soil took place so long ago even the survivors of survivors are no longer with us. Most do not have the resource to travel to the place where epic battles took place involving loved ones as the locations are generally thousands of miles away. The Civil War was about the last time these places of honor were somewhat accessible. The beauty of a large floating ship taking part in the historic battles of World War II is the fact it is docked in the states and can be visited. The trip to the Lexington was in reality a pilgrimage to a memorial to my dad and his service.

While my sister and I were standing on the great flight deck, a thought came to me wondering how a ship like this could be protected should someone want to make a point of destroying her? There are no armaments or defensive systems which could be used to thwart such a move.

After leaving the ship, I began to construct a story on how a group of terrorists could destroy this or any other symbol of America’s naval strength. Once I figured out how it could be done, then it was a matter of developing a way to prevent a disaster from happening which makes up the story line of My GRL. From there, I allowed the protagonist to get involved and shaped the story to a final conclusion.

The general plot came out of one quick observation. The story itself had to be built and as we all know, word by word.

Ten Things Not to do While Completing Your Taxes

~ John W. Howell ~ 17 Comments

Here is the 33rd installment of Ten Top Lists of What Not to Do by Marie Ann Bailey of 1WriteWay at http://1writeway.com and John W. Howell of Fiction Favorites at http://johnwhowell.com. These lists are simu-published on our blogs each Monday. We hope you enjoy.

 

IRS

Top Ten Things Not To Do While Doing Your Taxes

10.  While doing your taxes, do not allow the cat to sit on your keyboard. If you do, at best you may miss a couple of deductions.  At worst, your kitty may just add a few zeroes to your tax bill.

9.  While doing your taxes, do not have a hot drink sitting on some of your worksheets. If you do, at best you could tip it over and ruin the papers. At worst, you could tip it into your lap and jeopardize your love life till you heal.

8.  While doing your taxes, do not allow your do to play with the computer cord. If you do, at best you may run out of battery. At worst you may need to run out to the vet to help Fido overcome his electro shock treatment

7.  While doing your taxes, do not allow the family to play video games on your computer between sessions. If you do, at best some memory may disappear. At worst, the IRS may get a Madden football game instead of your 1040.

6.  While doing your taxes, do not leave your computer without saving your file. If you do, at best you might have to remember all your half-truths all over again. At worst ,you may be unable to reconstruct your perfect return and might end up owing more that you had planned.

5.  While doing your taxes, do not think the IRS is okay with rough guesses or estimates of the numbers. If you do, at best you will never hear from the IRS. At worst, you will have to explain your numbers during an audit to a disbelieving agent with a cattle prod.

4.  While doing your taxes, do not forget to sign your return even if you don’t believe it to be true. If you do, At best the return will bounce back. At worst, the lack of signature will trigger a visit from NSA who will want to know all about you.

3.  While doing your taxes, do not try to get away without attaching a check if you owe money. If you do, at best the government will send you a nasty note. At worst, you will find out how little a sense of humor the IRS really has.

2.  While doing your taxes, do not drink alcohol even if you think it will help. If you do, at best you might be shocked by the amount you deducted. At worst, you may be shocked to find you have already mailed the return on which you took too many deductions.

1.  While doing your taxes, do not be discouraged enough to decide not to file. If you do at best you will never sleep again. At worst, you may get your living expenses paid, but will have a roommate who wants to go steady.

 

Beyond Darkness: Shattered by Sarah M. Cradit Now Available

~ John W. Howell ~ 1 Comment

The long anticipated novella sequel to The Storm and the Darkness is now available across most major online retailers!

BeyondDarknessNowAvailable

Amazon

BN

Kobo

Smashwords

Createspace

Goodreads

Coming Soon: Itunes, Sony, Diesel

Anasofiya Deschanel fled to Maine to escape her mistakes. She learned quickly, and violently, you cannot run from what’s inside you.

Following a series of unfortunate events, Ana finds herself drowning in the consequences of actions which left her heart cruelly divided between the St. Andrews brothers. Jon’s embrace of darkness soon turns to dangerous cruelty, while Finn’s kind heart offers a promise of love she does not feel she deserves. Between all three of them lies a secret with the potential to change everything.

When the truth comes crashing down, Ana is forced to face the same demons she once ran from. As she learns more about who she is, and the situation she’s created, these realizations drive her to a desperate decision that will change everyone’s lives, forever.

Character Teasers

finnteaser_shattered anateaser_shattered jonteaser_shattered

The House of Crimson and Clover

The Sullivans, a family of hard-working Irish lawyers, came from nothing and built a life they can be proud of. The Deschanels amassed incredible wealth by siding with the North during the Civil War, betraying their people. Both New Orleans families have a dark and rich history, painted with secrets, treachery, and colorful, supernatural abilities.

The House of Crimson and Clover unravels the mysteries surrounding both families, pulling us further into their tangled, enigmatic lives.

While the series is meant to be treated as one long narrative, each book can stand alone and be enjoyed without having read the other books. I’ve created pages for each of the books in the series, with story descriptions and other info.

Recommended Reading Order:

Series Prequel- St. Charles at Dusk

Book 0.5- Beyond Dusk: Anne

Book 1- The Storm and the Darkness

Book 1.5- Beyond Darkness: Shattered

Book 2- The Illusions of Eventide

Book 2.5- Beyond Eventide: Bound

(More on the horizon…)

Also, read what reviewers are saying about The House of Crimson & Clover

Dreams of Love by Pamela is Now Here

~ John W. Howell

dreamsoflovecover

Description: Poetry is an expression from deep within the soul. It can be therapeutic and healing. It can bring out all the best or the worst in life. Her poetry comes from the heart, not the head. It is an outpouring of emotion and she exposes it to reader in the pages.

Various poetry forms are explored: free verse, tanka (5-7-5-7-7), doidotsu (7-7-7-5) and etheree (1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10).

Dreams of Love

Dreams of you and me
Together in ev’ry way
Your lips pressed to mine
Assuring me of your love
Dreams of love eternally

Purchase here!

pamelaPamela began writing poetry in just the last year. She is a nonprofit executive by day and spends her hours trying to be sure that everyone has a chance for a good life. Pamela is passionate about her job and it spills over into her writing. Dreams of Love is her debut poetry collection. Pamela feels that poetry can be very personal but invites you into her soul as you read her poems.

 

Visit the Author!

Poetry by Pamela
Year ‘Round Thanksgiving Project

TGIF is as TGIF Does

~ John W. Howell ~ 32 Comments

beer

Friday is here. Happy Valentines day.  Feels like we have been pulling a sled packed with tons of ice. Oh wait a minute, we have been pulling such a sled and have new meaning to the term “huddling masses.” I don’t think I have ever been this cold for this long. We normally have temperatures thirty degrees warmer and none of us are prepared for this. We go outside in flip-flops and shorts this time of year. If one were to do that now a frost bite kit should be carried along as well. It is so cold (how cold is it?) I saw a sea-gull trying to hitchhike to Miami. It is so cold, the coyotes have pulled out their human fur wraps. It is so cold, the pelicans have their bills packed with frozen fish. Anyway enough of the Henny Youngman jokes. Here is a Haiku to celebrate the coming spring.

Spring by John W. Howell ©2014

It is damn fridged,

Spring is a far away dream . . .

Beer stays real cold.

Hump Day is as Hump Day Does

~ John W. Howell ~ 39 Comments

Wednesday is story day to celebrate Hump Day. Since this is Wednesday there will be no exception. Today’s story tells of a young man thinking he has a solution to his problems. I hope you enjoy.

The holdup by John W. Howell ©2104

“Yes Sir, can I help you?”

“Er . . . why yes. I need to make a withdrawal.”

“I can help you with that. Do you have a withdrawal slip filled out, or do you wish for me to do it?”

“N-No I have it fill out. Here take it.”

“Oh my sir. This is not a proper withdrawal slip. This is a note.”

“Y-Yes just follow the instructions.”

“Let me see. It says to put all the money in a bag and don’t tough the alarm. I have a gun and I ain’t afraid to use it.”

“T-That’s what is says alright.”

“Sir I need to help you a bit here. First of all, you don’t want to put in writing you have a gun.”

“W-Why not?”

“When you say something about a gun this crime becomes armed robbery whether or not you have a gun. You see, in this state, the mere belief the perpetrator is armed is just as intimating as if you waved a gun around. Also, you just admitted to the higher offense in writing.”

“Just get the money and cut the chatter.”

“Secondly your note has a number of typos in it. As a substitute school teacher I just don’t have respect for you when you make these kinds of mistakes.”

“Mistakes where?”

“Here see the word ‘tough’ right here. I think you meant ‘touch.’ Don’t touch the alarm. Am I right?”

“Yes, but so what?”

“Also the word ‘ain’t’ should never be used in this context. You should say ‘I am not afraid to use it.’”

‘Well you got that right. I am not afraid to use it.”

“You actually have a gun?”

“Well. . . no not really.”

“Okay here’s what we are going to do. I’m going to tear up this note and give it back to you. You go home and think about what you did today. If you still want to hold up the bank, you come back tomorrow with a proper note. Do you understand young man?”

“Yes ma’am. Sorry ma’am.”