Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Psst”

November 18, 2017November 17, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 27 Comments

AAAAOOOOOGGGGAAA. It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again. I have to quote Linda Hill to explain this week’s prompt. Here is what Linda says, “Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “psst, or any other attention-getting noise or word.” Find a word or noise that you’d use to get someone’s attention, and start your post off with it. Enjoy!” So, now you know why I hit the ooga horn up front. If you would like to join in this fun go to Linda’s site and read how. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2017/11/17/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-nov-18-17/

“Hey, you.”

“Who are you yelling at.”

“Not the guy behind you I can assure you.”

“Alright. What do you want?”

“I need to ask you a favor.”

“A favor? What kind of favor?”

“Oh, its nothing that is illegal for you.”

“That never occurred to me. So why would you mention illegal?”

“I just meant it is nothing that will get you into trouble.”

“Trouble? What kind of trouble?”

“I mean there will be no trouble.”

“You said trouble first.”

“For heaven’s sake. Will you do me a favor or not?”

“Depends on what it is.”

“That’s reasonable.”

“Thank you. As long as it doesn’t cost me anything I’ll do it.”

“Yeah, well it might cost a little.”

“Well then count me out. What’s that?”

“Oh, this? It is my gun and I want your wallet.”

“You said it was not illegal.”

“For you, it’s not. For me big time. Hand it over.”

“I don”t have a wallet.”

“Where do you keep your money?”

“In a paper sack.”

“Let me see it.”

“Here.”

“It’s all pennies.”

“A penny saved is a penny earned.”

“Of all the patsies in this world, I gotta pick Scrooge McDuck.”

“I resemble that.”

“Get off my foot. Take your bag of pennies.”

“You are so nice.”

“Beat it.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Arm”

November 11, 2017November 10, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 31 Comments

A day to honor our veterans. I thank you all for your service which has allowed me to participate in and enjoy our country’s freedoms.

It is also Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again and this week’s prompt is “Arm.” We are advised to use it or any word that has “arm” in it. If you would like to participate in this madness visit Linda Hill’s blog and read how. You don’t even have to have normal personality traits to participate. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2017/11/10/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-nov-11-17/

“So how did you get him to say, “yes?”

“Simple. We arm wrestled, and I won.”

“Just like that? You beat him at arm wrestling, and he told you okay?”

“That’s all it took. No arm-twisting. No arguing, no strong-arm stuff. Just a simple arm wrestle.”

“How did you get him to agree to the contest?”

“It wasn’t too hard.”

“Okay tell me how.”

“I pulled out my firearm and told him I would shoot him if he didn’t arm wrestle me.”

“You told me you didn’t do any strong-arm stuff. What would you call pulling out a firearm?”

“A getting his attention device.”

“So you had the contest and how did it go.”

“Well, there we were pretty much locked in a draw. I could see his arm starting to quiver. I applied a little pressure and he slowly started to slip.”

“This is exciting. Go on.”

“I have this special trick I use. It is a twist of the wrist which gives me an advantage over my opponent.”

“So then you pinned his arm?”

“No, he started a comeback. I could not believe his arm was almost on the table when he started to rise. I could see the sweat breaking out on his forehead and he was grunting. The crowd was starting to chant for him.”

“What did you do?”

“I applied a little more pressure and his rally was over.”

“What kind of pressure?”

“Oh, something small which usually works.”

“What?”

“I pulled the hammer back on my firearm.”

“Cheater.”

“I prefer the term winner.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – “shortcut/cut short.”

November 4, 2017November 3, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 20 Comments

It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again. This week’s prompt is “shortcut/cut short.” Linda hill says we can use them anyway we want. If you would like to join in go to Linda’s blog and read how. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2017/11/03/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-nov-417/

“I’m taking a shortcut through the strawberry patch.”

“Why are you doing that?”

“I want to see what it is like to take a strawberry shortcut.”

“Man, you come up with the dumbest things. Enough of this, I need to cut short the chit-chat.”

“In a rush are we?”

“Yes. I have to go downtown and speak with the tax appraiser.”

“Uh oh. That sounds ominous.”

“Not so bad. I need to ask them for a reappraisal of my house.”

“They will do that?”

“Yes. If you have a change of circumstance they will.”

“So what change of circumstance did you have?”

“You are kidding right?”

“What?”

“You were the one who decided to cut short your vacation and stay at my house instead.”

“Yes, I did.”

“And you were the one who wanted to take a shortcut and put the roast in the microwave.”

“Well, it was a good idea for reducing cooking time.”

“You also recall that the microwave caught on fire.”

“Well, I didn’t know that was going to happen.”

“What shortcut did you take with the fire?”

“Pan of water.”

“Which caused the grease to spatter and catch the island on fire.”

“Yeah, that water didn’t work too well.”

“The who decided to cut short his visit?”

“Uh. Me.”

“Correct. Meanwhile the kitchen is in flames.”

“I couldn’t do anything anyway.”

“Which spread to the upstairs.”

“That was one shortcut I didn’t expect.”

“Finally to the roof.”

“Time to cut short the description. I get it.”

“Get what?”

“Your house burned down and now you need a reappraisal.”

“Thanks to whom?”

“The change of circumstance.”

“Start running. Now.”

“Time for the shortcut.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “which/witch/wich.”

October 28, 2017October 27, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 42 Comments

Which day is today?

Stream of Consciousness Saturday of course. Today’s prompt is “which/witch/wich. Linda Hill also has some informative words. “Start your post with the word “which” and try to fit the word “witch” in somewhere if you can. Bonus points if you use a word that ends in “wich.” As an added rule this week, you will lose all the points you’ve ever earned if you type “which witch is which” anywhere in your post. Have fun!” You think it is easy being a prompt head, don’t you? Well, so far I’m okay. I started the post with which so I have that done. Now to work in witch and a word ending in wich. If you would like to become addicted to this fun visit Linda Hill’s blog at https://lindaghill.com/2017/10/27/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-2817/. You can read all about how to take the first dose.

“Which one are you?”

“I’m the guy who drove you home.”

“Oh. Did I thank you for that help?”

“No, not really. I think the barf in my front seat was thanks enough.”

“My word. I did that?”

“Yes.you did. Your friends took care of the backseat.”

“My friends?”

“Yes, that group of guys who were with you.”

“Wow. I don’t even remember a group of guys. By the way how come you are still here this morning?”

“You swallowed my keys.”

“I did what?”

“You thought I was too drunk to drive, so you took my keys and swallowed them.”

“Were you?”

“Too drunk?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t drink. You were definitely drunk though.”

“Yeah, I get that. Soooo where did you sleep?”

“On your couch.”

“Thank goodness. you weren’t in my bed then.

“No, I was not in your bed.”

“I am such a witch sometimes. Er, I don’t mean that to be a bad thing. Um, you are handsome and everything but I was too drunk for love.”

“I understand. I think I better get going.”

“What about your keys?”

“Oh, you got rid of them about three-thirty and threw them to me.”

“Don’t tell me I heaved the keys.”

“On my chest. On your couch.”

“How can I make it up to you?”

“It’s okay. It was an interesting time for sure.”

“But you must have been miserable.”

“No. I found that the experience broadened my view of life.”

“How so?”

“Made me aware of new rules.”

“New rules? Like what?”

“Before being forced from a party to drive someone like you home, always grab a sandwich.”

“A sandwich?”

“A sandwich.”

“Why a sandwich?”

“You’ll always have a choice of what to eat when you have a sandwich.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – “Season”

October 21, 2017October 20, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 44 Comments

Season is the reason for this week’s Stream of Conscious Saturday session. Theis weeks prompt is “Season,” and Linda Hill said we could add a suffix to it as well. There are bonus points for the first, and last words of the post are “season” or a seasoning. If you would like to join in on the fun, please visit Linda Hill (midnight is best) and find out all about it. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2017/10/20/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-2117/

Oh yes, Linda said there would be extra bonus points if we had pictures. That is not going to happen.

“Deck the halls with Boston Charlie.”

“What are you doing?”

“Getting into the spirit of the season.”

“what season are you talking about?”

“The holiday season. You know the one no one can actually say anymore.”

“Are you nuts?”

“Why?”

“It is not even Halloween, and you are singing about the holidays.”

“I have to ask. What’s wrong with that?”

“You sound like a lunatic. There is Halloween, and Thanksgiving before the holidays. Why aren’t you singing about Halloween?”

“I don’t know any Halloween carols.”

“Your Boston Charlie isn’t exactly a carol either.”

“Oh, I get it. Okay, let’s try this.

Trick or treat for Halloween,

Load my bag with candy.

If you cheat me, I’ll get mean,

And play a trick that’s dandy.”

“Stop.”

“What’s the problem?”

“You are killing me. Go back to the holiday stuff.”

“I thought it was quite good.”

“I think songs don’t cut it during the Halloween season.”

“Oh, I don’t know it could be a new thing.”

“Now you did it.”

‘What.”

“You added to the post. I had it finished and bonus points in the bag when I said ‘Halloween season.”‘

“You doing that prompt thing again?”

“Yes of course. Haven’t you noticed, it’s the only time I talk to you.”

“Now that you mention it, I do notice.”

“So what do you think?”

“Makes me think you are right.”

“Right? How?”

“We should end the post with the word season.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Well.”

October 14, 2017October 13, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 32 Comments

It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again and this weeks prompt is, “Well.” (Deep subject) If you would like to participate in this fun visit Linda Hill’s blog and read how. Here is her link https://lindaghill.com/2017/10/13/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-1417/

“Well, what did he say?”

“He said you and I need to get to the well.”

“Does that mean we are hired?”

“well, I don’t believe he would send us out to the well unless he intends to make us an offer.”

“That would be swell. You know a job on an oil well is just the kind of well-paying opportunity that will make us well again.”

“Well, don’t get your hopes up too high. He could just not be feeling well and wanted to get rid of us?”

“That would not be well-meaning. You talked about work right?”

“Of course I talked about work. I told him we were two able-bodied workers who were well qualified for work on a well.”

“Well said. Why don’t we get to the well and start working?”

“Do you have gloves?”

“No. You didn’t tell him we were well equipped, did you?”

“I didn’t mention anything about equipment, but I do know well work takes a good pair of gloves.”

“Maybe we need to stop at the outfitter before we get to the well.”

“We are not well off, and those gloves cost a bunch.”

“Yes, but they are well made, so they are worth it.”

“I guess you are right a couple of oil well workers need gloves.”

“So you in? We stop and then go to the well.”

“Yup. We need to get a lunch too. The day won’t go well if we don’t eat.”

“I’m glad you thought of that. You may well have saved our butts.”

“That’s what I’m here for. Well trained to save butts.”

“Very well. Let’s go.”

“I’m well positioned right behind you.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Save/Safe”

October 7, 2017October 6, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 27 Comments

Save the whales, it is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again. This weeks prompt is Save/Safe and Linda Hill’s stand-in Joey says we can use the words any way we want. If we start or end the post with one or the other, then there are bonus points to be had. I’m all over bonus points hence the weird start. If you would like to get on board with this, please visit Linda’s blog post and read how. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2017/10/06/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-617/

“Save me the humor. Just answer the question.”

“Could you repeat the question, please?”

“Is it safe?”

“Okay, I may be missing something but is what safe?”

“I had hoped you would be able to tell me.”

“Now this is sounding like a movie. Are you a dentist?”

“No. I’m not a dentist. I need to know if the package is safe.”

“What package are you talking about.”

“Save the act for Hollywood. You know very well what package.”

“If I know very well how come I can’t tell you?”

“Maybe a little convincing is necessary.”

“Now you save me the dramatics. you going to torture me?”

“Oh please. I’m going to show you a picture of you and the package.”

“Let’s see it. Yeah, that does look like me.”

“What is under your arm?”

“Looks like a package.”

“Ah ha. Exactly. Where is the package now?”

“You are kidding right?”

“We don’t kid. Now, where is it?”

“In my car.”

“Your car? How did it get into your car?”

“I put it there before you grabbed me off the street.”

“Funny I should have noticed that.”

“I would say. Now you’ve made a mess.”

“Mess? What mess.”

“Illegal detention.”

“Oh that. We are all gentlemen here. We can let bygones be bygones.”

“If you let me go we can. Why do you want that package anyway?”

“It is a matter of national security.”

“My laundry is a matter of national security?”

“Laundry?”

“Yes, that’s what was in the package.”

“Mr. Young I can assure you we have it on good authority you are transporting government secrets.”

“My name is Horowitz.”

“Oh, my. Horowitz, you say?”

“Yes. I demand you let me go.”

“Is it safe?”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Hot/Cold”

September 23, 2017September 22, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 28 Comments

Hot damn. It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again. This weeks prompt is “hot/cold.” There are bonus points for beginning the post with one and ending the post with the other. Now you see why I lead off with “hot damn.” If you would like to be involved with this craziness, then visit Linda Hill’s post and read all about it. Here is the link.

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Sept. 23/17

“Hot coffee is what will revive me.”

“What’s the problem.”

“Not sure. I haven’t been sleeping well lately.”

“That’s not good. You have something on your mind?”

“Not really.”

“I could have guessed your answer.”

“What do you mean.”

“I look upon your mind as expansive as a great vast empty ballroom.”

“My, what a nice thing to say.”

“You are kidding right?”

“No, why?”

“I just said you were empty-headed.”

“I thought you were telling me my mind was of high-capacity.”

“Every time I talk to you, I get this feeling you hear, but you don’t understand.”

“No need to be rude. So I’m not a deep thinker. I still am having trouble sleeping.”

“What time do you eat dinner?”

“Nine o’clock. Why?”

“What time do you go to bed?”

“Ten o’clock. What are you saying?”

“You should not eat anything for at least three hours before you go to sleep. Your body has to work hard to get rid of the food, and so you are unable to sleep.”

“Yeah, whatever happened to the food coma concept?”

“The what?”

“You know when you have a big dinner you want to lay down and take a nap?”

“Who does that?”

“A lot of people I know.”

“You run with a pack of pigs?”

“Now that is cold.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Vol”

September 16, 2017September 15, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 51 Comments

It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again and this weeks prompt is “Vol.” Yup, that’s right. Linda Hill says to find a word with “vol” in it and construct the post. She also advises the group to have fun. If you would like to participate in the fun go to Linda’s blog and find out how. Here is the link https://lindaghill.com/2017/09/15/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-sept-1617/

“So what did she say?”

“Find a word with vol in it and write the post.”

“That’s it?”

“Oh, and she said to have fun with it.”

“Ha. Easy for her to say. You and I are here on the line and she sits in that Ivory Tower handing out prompts like they are free.”

“They are.”

“Are what?”

“Free.”

“What do you mean. We have to put our very heart into this crap. We sweat bullets over these damn words. How can you say they are free?”

“You finished?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Okay then, Let’s put our thinking caps on and come up with a word that has vol in it.”

“I hate that.”

“What?”

“The phrase thinking cap. I don’t have a cap. It is my brain that does all the thinking.”

“Did you get your coffee this morning?”

“Had five cups. Why?”

“You seem a little wound up is all.”

“Fine. Volume, Volvo, convoluted, volleyball, benevolent, voluptuous, devolution, malevolent, and voluminous. Just to name a few.”

That’s great. On which do you want to base a post?”

“None of them.”

“None of them? Why not?”

“They have all been done before. Let’s do something original.”

“Okay like what?”

“Well there is a village in Iran named Vol. We could do a story on it.”

“Ho hum.”

“There is Vol Dooley a former sheriff Louisiana. We could do his story.”

“Ugh.”

“How about the computer command Vol?”

“Wait a minute. You went on-line and looked this stuff up, right?”

“Well, yeah. So what?”

“So what? Do you know how frivolous this makes you look?”

“I think I’m a revolutionist.”

“I think you show the voluminousness of the empty space where your brian should be.”

“I’m thinking you border on the revolting.”

“Says the man with the vole sized brain.”

“You better vol.”

“Huh? What does that mean?”

“It’s French for flight and you should take the hint.”

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt “Motive”

September 9, 2017September 8, 2017 ~ John W. Howell ~ 34 Comments

It is Steam of Consciousness Saturday and this weeks prompt is “motive.” Linda Hill says we can use the word any way we want. If you would like to join in the fun, please go to Linda’s site and read all about it. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2017/09/08/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-sept-917/

“I wonder what gimmick the seminar leader is going to use to motivate us.”

“Oh, I believe it is the old trust your fellow workers with exercises designed to make us all not trust each other.”

“Ha ha ha. remember that time we were supposed to catch Jenkins as he fell.”

“My gosh, that was funny. He fell right on his head. Did he ever come back to work?”

“I heard they set him to a feelings doctor. He had PSSD.”

“PSSD? What’s that?”

“Post Seminar Stress Disorder.”

“No kidding. I think I have had that myself.”

“What do you suppose is management’s motive for this kind of foolishness.”

“They call it team building. I guess it’s meant to bring us together.”

“I never did forgive Simmons for that paint ball shot to the groin.”

“I’m not surprised. To see you on the ground crying like a baby is not a vision soon forgotten.”

“That was not my proudest moment. How about you? That time you were left out in the woods with no shoes.”

“My team was supposed to fetch me a pair.”

“Too bad the bar opened before they could get back.”

“I hate those people.”

“All we have is each other in this thing. I got your back.”

“Aw, thanks, man. I love you too. Oops here comes the leader.”

“Ladies and gentleman please give me your attention. This seminar is a little different from most. At the end of the week, the company will be promoting half of you based on how well you do with a pay increase of 10% above your current level. The other half will return to their old jobs at a wage level of 90 % of the previous amount.”

“Did you hear that?”

“You talking to me? Do I know you?