This Post was published on May 17, 2018. I think it is still relevant.
Top Ten Things Not to Put Off When You Have a Lot to Do
Living long enough to experience what happens when things are put off inspires this list. Not all of these things have occurred, but enough to give me the title of Consultant on What Not to Put Off.
10 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off buying an anniversary present. If you do, at best, you’ll have to spend more to find a gift. At worst, what you want to give is no longer available, and your second choice falls way short. (That pair of rubber dish gloves just didn’t have the same panache did it, Emanuele?)
9 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off paying Tiny, the WWF champ, the ten bucks you borrowed. If you do, at best, you won’t run into Tiny. At worst, you’ll meet Tiny just after he leaves his financial planner with the news that he is broke. (Right now would be a good time to have that ten spot out where Tiny can see it, Emesto. There won’t be time once he grabs you by the throat.)
8 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off responding to that traffic ticket. If you do, at best, you can cover the late fee. At worst, a rookie police officer will see you drive by and will have memorized the license plates of all the outstanding warrants for this week. (Yes, those lights and sirens mean to pull over, Emo. You better hope someone can come and bail you out. Oh, and don’t worry about your new car. The wrecker folks got that name for a reason.)
7 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off paying that final notice on the water and electric bill. If you do, at best, you might get a grace period. At worse, you planned on filling the bathtub and buying some candles but were caught by surprise. (How do those shins feel after hitting that coffee table five times, Enceladus?)
6 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off filing your taxes. If you do, at best, you will remind the IRS agent of his father. At worst, you will remind the IRS agent of her ex-husband. (Why do the terms ‘delinquent, fine, and jail term’ keep coming up in the discussion, Eoin?)
5 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off renewing your auto or driver’s license. If you do at best, a wait at the DMV is the only penalty. At worst, just when some eyewitness of a bank robbery described a car like yours, a state police officer pulled in behind you. (Don’t think these guys aren’t going to have guns drawn, Eren. The bank robber will probably get a lighter sentence than driving with expired plates and license.)
4 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off sending your house insurance premium. If you do, at best, your banker will remind you. At worst, the rare piece of space junk entering the atmosphere and landing on your house will remind you of the forgotten check. (Don’t worry, Erin. Insurance companies have huge hearts and will likely forgive your oversight. Believe that, and I have an underwater lot I think you would like.)
3 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off making those airline reservations to attend the mandatory company seminar. If you do, at best, you’ll have a center seat on a packed plane. At worst, you’ll be on standby, and as luck would have it, there are no seats available. (Who would have thought that Dubuque, Iowa, was such a popular destination, Erskine? You can tell by the tension in the voice that the boss is not going to forgive and forget.)
2 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off paying that credit card bill. If you do, at best, you’ll rack up a big late fee. At worse, just when you are trying to impress someone by grabbing the dinner check, the waiter comes back and tells you in a loud voice that your card has been denied. (You can try all you want to explain a bank error, Eske. Your soon-to-be ex-client isn’t believing your story.)
1 If you have a number of things going on, do not put off double checking your parachute before your skydive this weekend. If you do, at best, it was done right. At worst, you will find yourself in a position of having to hope the spare will do the job. (After all, Estanislao, you have gained a few pounds. Oh, and that go-cam recording should be hilarious, so let’s hope you are there to enjoy it.)
Fiction Favorites 
Brilliant as always
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Thank you, Cazzy.
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1. Your words are like fireworks, lighting up the night with laughter.
2. You turn mundane moments into sparkling gems of humor.
3. Your wit dances on the page, a masterclass in comedic timing.
4. You craft jokes so sharp, they could carve statues from stone.
5. Your humor is a breath of fresh air, crisp and invigorating.
6. Every punchline you write is a symphony of cleverness and charm.
7. You have the rare gift of making the ordinary extraordinarily funny.
8. Your comedic touch is as light as a feather, yet leaves a lasting impact.
9. You weave humor into your stories with the skill of a seasoned magician.
10. In a world full of noise, your comedy rings clear and true, a joyful melody.
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You are the analogy champion, Cazzy. I have no words.
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I laughed at that reference to Dubuque. Being a native Iowan, it made perfect sense. Beyond that, #5 brought back memories of the year I managed to forget to renew both my driver’s license and car registration. One day, a local cop stopped me to talk about the nature of a ‘rolling stop.’ The resulting court date was hilarious: small town, judge in Hawaiian shirt and flip flops, ceiling fan with blades like palm fronds in an un-air-conditioned city hall. Memorable.
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I got pulled over for a rolling stop once. The local cop had to explain it to me.
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I’m guessing you got let go with a warning.
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Yes, that’s right.
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I knew it.
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I am honored to have called up this moment in time for you. I can see that judge and got a smile. My first management assignment was in Illinois and Dubuque was part of that area. I remember long drives, deep snow, and the deep darkness of night. I didn’t have to go there often but when I did there were always memories.
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This is why I feel like adulthood is a trap. Not nearly as much fun as I was led to believe.
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Ha ha ha. I have had that feeling many times. Now that this tour is winding down, I can look back and see those times in some perspective.
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I think I’d be more likely to forget about the parachute than my taxes. It’s somehow even scarier than hurtling down from thousands of feet in the air.
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I think the cartoon says a lot about tax worries. Thanks, Pilgrim.
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Oh yes it does.
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😳
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Putting off anything that involves paying what one owes is a bad idea, all right!
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I’m going to give you a philosopher moniker if you keep up these words of wisdom. 🤣
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Oops . . .
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Ha ha ha
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In the past, I have been guilty of 2 & 5. I learned my lesson real quick. [I would have preferred dealing with Tiny!!]
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Both are painful. I think the DMV visit might take the top honor for pain. The credit card miss is a matter of having to pay more but that seems less painful to me.
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Rubber dish gloves. The gift that keeps on giving… back.
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I can hear the announcement each time they are used. “Oh I am so thrilled with these lovely gloves.”
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Thank goodness the last one the list is the only thing I can put off since I don’t skydive 😉 But everything else on your list applies 😬😆
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Maybe you could take up skydiving and then that would be one you could put off.
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lol … no 😉
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Yeah, no.
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Yes,indeed! Some things have to be taken care of.
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Yes they do for sure. Thanks, Tim.
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Really funny, John! Don’t mess with Tiny.
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Never.
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🙂
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This is hysterical. I get some of these notifications that terrify me and I send the to my husband. Most of the time, they’re a scam.. 🙀
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I love the one about my order for $24,000 has been accepted and to call for delivery.
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Crazy 🤪
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Indeed.
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😉
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All good advice and a few I learned the hard way.
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I think we all learned the hard way. Thanks, Denise.
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I am always a sucker for a quality grim reaper reference, John. #6…keep meeting up with the Tax Man to a minimum!
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Thanks, Bruce.
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Good list, John. It’s so easy to get busy doing “other stuff” and failing to tend to what’s right in front of us. I think the take-away is, Cut ourselves a little slack. Nobody can do it all!
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I think that is the best take-a-way. Thanks, Debbie.
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I’m gonna have to print this one off so I remember what not to do. 🌺🩷😂
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I should make these lists in color so they look good on the refrigerator. Thanks, Kymber.
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Hahaha! I’m LOL’ing for real. 😀 I just think that response is brilliant. 🌺
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😁
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These are all sound bits of advice, John.
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Thank you, Dale. 😊
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Hee hee…great list, John. And such sage life advice. And before I procrastinate the thought, Happy Monday. 😁
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Oh, Thank you, Monika. Happy Monday to you.
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Made a note of checking my parachute, in case I tick that item off my bucket list.
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Don’t confuse the parachute pack with laundry
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You just reminded me I have to pay my credit card bill
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Very important.
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I made a coupe of these mistakes when I was younger. What? 68 was younger!
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Yes indeed. As you’ll find out every year before this one is younger.
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😂
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😁
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I use rubber dish gloves regularly, but Hubby knows better than to get me those as a present, lol.
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That would be like buying an iron. 😁
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I don’t think I will be skydiving this weekend, but it is too early in the week to know for sure. 🪂 Many things in this life to keep up with! Prioritizing does keep it simplified. Thank you for the humorous spin!
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If you do skydive just don’t get the chute and laundry mixed up. Thank you, Michele.
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😂 Will do my best! 😅 Thank you!
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😊
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Very worthy tips John. 🙂
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Thank you, Debby. 😊
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🙂
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😊
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Great advice, as always, but the humor warms the heart and evokes laughter. Bravo!
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Thank you, Gwen. I’m glad you got some laughs. That warms the heart too. 😊
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No wonder we have so many people filled with anxiety. There’s always something to worry about.
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Always. Part of human nature.
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I have some experience with at least two of these. 😄
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I think we all do, Chel. Thank you. 😁
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Hahahaha. Love these “Top 10” posts, John! Thanks for the giggles. Oh, and for reminding me that my license expires this year. 😉
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Always happy to be of service, Sue. Thank you for the smile.
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I put off reading this! And now I am stuck with #5. I’ve needed to renew my license for a month!
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Oh dear. Best not speed.
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I still have a little time!
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Oh, good. 😊.
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You have a fiend named Estanislao?
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He taught me everything I needed to know about rebellion.
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Sounds like a good role model.
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Indeed.
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Oooh, numbers 10 and 2 hit close to home🥴
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Hit close to a lot of homes. Thanks, Steve.
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