Hump Day is as Hump Day Does

 

camel

Here is a quick story for hump day. Warning. . .  this one is a little weird and came rolling out of my head with little control. It is called My FLY.

My FLY by John W. Howell ©2014

“OMG, if I don’t find a place to lay these eggs soon I am going to burst.”

“Now dear you can put those eggs anywhere. You know that.”

“The doctor told me I needed to find some healthy waste so the babies would have a good start.”

“Start schmart. You know those little maggots don’t appreciate anything.”

“Yes, but it is a mother’s duty to give them the best chance.”

“Yeah and what does it get you. When’s the last time we heard from any of those adults? How many are there now a couple a billion?”

“Well dear I’m sure they are just busy. You know with flying around and looking for places to lay eggs. It is nowhere near a billion. I think millions would be more accurate. Of course, who knows how many have been taken by the giant swatter?”

“I heard old man Nichols got swatted last week.”

“Oh my. I hadn’t heard. How’s Mrs. Nichols?”

“Took it real hard. She hasn’t left her dung heap since.”

“I’ll have to stop by and give her my condolences.”

“Now there is an idea. You could kill two birds with one stone. Say hello and you’re sorry to Nichols, then drop off that pile of eggs.”

“You know it just might work. Get my suitcase it is time we went to give birth. Thanks for the idea.”

“No problem. We should probably fly low. I hear there is a swatter up high.”

“You know best dear.”

 

 

 

23 comments

  1. Brilliant! I love it, its so clever!

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    1. Aw. Thank you Dean

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  2. Ungrateful maggots! Funny story thanks!

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    1. Thanks for stopping by. Glad you enjoyed it.

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  3. Now, that’s a hump. Ha.

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  4. Gulp!! How sad, not hearing from any of their ungrateful offspring. ( Wow!! How many? 😉 ) A different slice of life, served up so well, xx

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    1. Thank you. Quite a complement from such a talent.

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  5. You should post what comes “rolling out of [your] head with little control” more often. Favorite line: “She hasn’t left her dung heap since.” Made my morning 🙂

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    1. So glad you liked it. BTW am I on for the next list?

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      1. No, it’s my turn. I have it written up, just need a picture 🙂

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      2. With all this blog tour stuff I’m getting fuzzy. I’m glad it’s you. Bless you my child.

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      3. You indeed have your hands full, but you are doing a wonderful job with the blog tour.

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      4. Thank you so much.

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  6. That is brilliant – cool John! 😀

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  7. Great story to get one through the middle of the week. For some reason the Old Man Nichols part had me chuckling.

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  8. Icky. But hilarious. 💩

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  9. Brilliant to take something so trivial as a fly and work it into such a heartfelt story. A little twisted but brilliant.

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    1. Thanks. This came to me when I was riding my bike and a fly landed in my eye. (scheeze another alliteration)

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