In Keith’s words now that he is back. “Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm on Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.
Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries, with links to your own blog or web site, on Monday.”
The photo.
The Square by John W. Howell © 2018
“Okay this is part 24B so why doesn’t it fit in slot 24?”
“You sure you read the instructions right?”
“I did. The next step is to fit part 24B into slot 24.”
“Why is the part so short then? Slot 24 is a foot bigger.”
“Yeah, that has me puzzled as well.”
“I have never seen such a confused mess in my whole life.”
“What do you mean ‘confused mess?'”
“Just look at this thing. Half the parts are not the right size, and it seems some are missing.”
“I checked all the parts before I began and they were all here.”
“Then why do you seem to have run out of material?”
“If I knew that I would have this conundrum solved. I called you for help not for stating the obvious.”
“Okay. I get it. Let me look at the plan.”
“It’s over there under the coffee cups.”
“Let me see. I just love these Ikea directions. I have a mechanical engineering degree and feel underqualified.”
“So what do you think?”
“For starters did you look at the picture?”
“No. Can’t say I did.”
“If you had you would realize this is supposed to be a square.”
“A square? I didn’t buy a square. I bought a rectangle. The foundation is for a rectangle.”
“You better look at your order then. You have a square. Did you get this at the Ikea store?”
“No, I ordered it online.”
“I think you better return it. You will never have enough material to finish a rectangle.”
“Look at my order. It clearly says the measurements are a rectangle.”
“All the better. It is their fault then. Wait what is this message in red?”
“Please check your order carefully before you begin assembly. No refunds or returns once assembly has begun.”
“Looks like you are screwed.”
“What if I order another square?”
“Humm let me see. If I measure the sides and multiply by two. Yes, that will work.”
“I’m going to do it right now.”
“Just your luck you will get a rectangle.”
“That will work too.”
“Just think of the money you saved by ordering online.”
“Dark sarcasm in the classroom.”
“Yeah, sorry.”
Fiction Favorites 
Does Ikea really have that type of no refund policy?
LikeLiked by 1 person
No. Poetic license. 😀
LikeLike
It’s very well done since it’s so believable.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Charles.
LikeLike
You’re welcome
LikeLiked by 1 person
Do I sense the voice of experience here, John?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Taken from real life. 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
I can believe that!
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLike
“Dark sarcasm in the classroom.” an excellent line.
LikeLike
My inner Pink Floyd coming out. Thanks, Robbie.
LikeLike
It’s just a wild guess, but I think I hear more than a few expletives in the background. Great job capturing the frustration, John. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hear them too. Thanks, Gwen
LikeLiked by 1 person
LOL! Great job, John. I’m trying to figure out what the heck those guys are building.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I couldn’t tell either so I want with generic shapes. Thanks, Jill
LikeLiked by 1 person
Part B, is this part B? No I think this is part B…. right?
LikeLiked by 1 person
“What’s that letter under your thumb?”
LikeLiked by 1 person
lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
😀
LikeLike
hahah It really is rough when you have to build your own dog house before you are sent to it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Insult to injury. Thanks, Pamela.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Directions? We don’t need no stinking directions.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ha haha. Thanks, Dan.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I guess I shouldn’t ask what happened to part 24A, LOL.
I I try to avoid buying anything that says “assembly required” but it’s not always possible. And then there’s the joy when you have most of the what’s-it together, then realize quality control didn’t include all the parts!
Great one, John!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Mae. My deal is once it is done there are parts left over. Drives me nuts.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol! Yes, it always pays to look the order over carefully! 🙂 Thanks for the chuckle, John!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Jan
LikeLiked by 1 person
Might want to order a few more. I don’t think My Grrl will fit in that garage.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha ha. Pretty true. Need at least 65 feet.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Here is my take on IKEA.
OMG, you screwed up the order.
How so?
You ordered an Omphlekettle instead of an Ömphlekettle
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha haha. The inprotance of an umlaut.
LikeLike
John, it is important to remind our readers that people have been seriously injured while attempting to pronounce IKEA product names – with or without the umlat.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The fifth cause of death among twenty-somethings.
LikeLike
John,
I totally relate to this Ikea moment. I resemble it even!
And I love how you tucked the classic Pink Floyd line in there . . sweet!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Just had to give a bow to Pink Floyd. Thanks, Marc
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hooray!
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Regardless of the manufacturer, one should never build oneself into a box!! Great job, John.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good advice, Debbie. 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is why I never put things together! Good one:)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha ha. Thank you, Denise.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahaha!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Glad you liked it. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol, this sounds like DH and I when we try to work together 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha haha. Slice of life. Thanks, Jacquie
LikeLiked by 1 person
If I had been one of those guys, I’d have been very confused by all those measurements, John. Reminds me of the days of flatpack furniture. Now I just call ‘Flatpack Dan’ and he comes around and assembles everything for me.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good to have a “Flatpack Dan.” We don’t have one.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on Loleta Abi.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for the reblog, Traci.
LikeLike
[…] via Tuesday – Anything Possible – Creative Kue #199 by Keith Channing […]
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Traci
LikeLike
[…] The Square by John W. Howell © 2018 […]
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love the last line, dark sarcasm in the classroom.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nod to Pink Floyd for sure.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Definitely!
LikeLiked by 1 person