Today is the anniversary of the opening of the first McDonald’s by Ray Kroc in 1955. It was sixty-four years ago that the fast food innovation began. In case you have a way to get back there here is a list of things not to do that will hopefully keep you from making a big mistake.
Top Ten Things Not to Do at the Opening of the First Ray Kroc McDonalds.
10 If you are at the opening, do not try to order your burger without onions. If you do, at best your request will be ignored. At worst, you’ll be asked to stand aside and in twenty or so hours you’ll get your burger. ( I have to say you were warned, Goodwine. If Ray wanted to eliminate ketchup from the burger he would have done it already.)
9 If you are at the opening, do not drop a paper on the ground while Tiny the WWF champ is in charge of picking up trash around the restaurant. If you do, at best he will ask you politely to pick it up. At worst, he will pick up the garbage and you and deposit both in the nearest can. (I know this space in the trashcan is tight, Gorman. The bad news is Tiny is adding more trash. You better hope collection day is soon.)
8 If you are at the opening, do not take any time to make up your mind on what to order. If you do, at best there is no one behind you. At worst, the person behind you has not eaten for twelve hours. (Not sure why you have a problem ordering, Gottfried. The menu only had a hamburger, cheeseburger, fries, shake, coke, root beer, orange drink, and coffee. How hard could it be?)
7 If you are at the opening, do not ask for ketchup for your fries. If you do, at best you will be refused. At worse, you will be subjected to the corporate lecture on why the McDonald policy forbids supplying ketchup for fries. (You now realize customer service does not include satisfying customer wants, Gowyn. Unhappy? Go pay 35¢ for a burger somewhere else.)
6 If you are at the opening, do not ask for a fillet-O-fish sandwich. If you do, at best no one will understand you. At worst, the employees will think you are trying to make trouble and call the police. (This is a fine kettle of fish you have gotten yourself into Gram. You should have known the fillet-O-fish was not introduced until 1965. The police are very interested in you now.)
5 If you are at the opening, do not ask for a seat inside. If you do, at best you’ll get a strange look. At worst, the manager will bring you in, and you’ll be waiting on customers before you know what happened. (If you keep at it, Graysen you might become the President like Fred Turner who started at the counter. Inside seating wasn’t available until 1962.)
4 If you are at the opening, do not start singing “Two all beef patties, lettuce, cheese, onion, pickle, special sauce on a sesame seed bun.” If you do, at best the employees will think you daft. At worst, the manager will think you are having a mental breakdown and will call an ambulance. (Since the Big Mac was introduced in 1968 it will be thirteen years until you are released from the sanitarium, Gregoly. Try not to make any trouble until then.)
3 If you are at the opening, do not start waxing poetic about the McGriddle breakfast. If you do, at best you’ll be ignored. At worst you’ll be asked to make a McGriddle and when you fail tossed out on your ear. ( So much for having a glimpse into the future huh, Griff. Best not show your face here again.)
2 If you are at the opening, do not ask them to supersize your order. If you do, at best you’ll get a blank stare. At worst, a well-meaning customer will pull you aside and give you a talk about the evils of overeating. (You should have remembered, Grim that the super-sized concept was way off in the future and a trend that didn’t last.)
1 If you are at the opening, do not remain at the store longer than to eat your burger. If you do, at best you’ll get looks from the employees. At worst you will be accused of loitering. (Before the police arrive you may get the explanation that Ray Kroc did not install payphones or vending machines near the restaurants so that bums like you would just eat and move on. Aw, don’t be so sensitive, Guglielmo. He didn’t think of you personally as a loitering bum. Just the rest of humanity.)
Fiction Favorites 
Gosh, 64 years ago? Now the Golden Arches are in most cities/towns and all know of McDonald’s. Whether I like the food or not, the ingenuity astounds me. Thank you, John. This was a fun read. 😀
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I’m glad you enjoyed it, Gwen. Was fun to do the research. McD’s has had its shere of ups and downs.
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Didn’t realize you couldn’t alter your order back then. Wonder when that started for any restaurant.
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I think competition rammped up. Burger King started a “have it your way campaign,” which caused McD’s to rethink their standards.
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I prefer it this way. Especially since people always assume others like cheese on their burgers.
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I love the look of the original buildings. It’s too bad #2 didn’t stick… we might not have the obesity problem we have today. I enjoyed this, John!
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Thank you, Jill.
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Whoa! Time really does pass us by!
If I ever go back in time, John, I’ll be certain to heed these warnings, but here in the present, they provided a good morning chuckle!
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Thank yu, Gp. That’s the whole idea.
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I wonder what would happen if I ordered a vege burger? Yup, we have the Golden Arches here in Spain too. Haven’t been to a McDonalds since the kids left home. It is quite a success story though.
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😀
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I wonder what would happen if I ordered a vege burger? Yup, we have the Golden Arches here in Spain too. Haven’t been to a McDonalds since the kids left home. It is quite a success story though.
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Not sure why this posted twice. Delete one if you can. Thanks.
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Ha haha. Thanks, Darlene.
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Veggy burger would have gotten you a trip to the quiet home. 😁
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What do you mean you don’t have wifi?
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Toss that man.
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Gosh, remember when fast food used to be fast?
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Me too. Now it is just annoying.
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#5 had me chuckling out loud! 🙂 Great list, John! And, Craig, classic comment!
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Thank you, Jan. He usually has a classic.
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Awesome, John! Wonder what Ray would think of today’s restaurants? Wi-Fi, flat-screen TVs, play yards for the kiddies, etc. Talk about loitering!!
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He would not be pleased I’m sure.
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McDonald’s is as old as me? Well, a little older, but. I remember those early days. One of my friends always asked for a burger with no onions. I think we hated him as much as the clerks. Where’s Tiny when you need him? Great list, John.
The Big Mac, by the way, was invented in Pittsburgh by a franchise owner who was trying to compete with Eat’n Park’s Big Boy. I introduced my daughter to Eat’n Park and we stop at least once ever time we visit Pittsburgh.
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I’m always that person from #10. Four things I don’t eat – onions, peppers, mayo, and mustard. Try going to a restaurant and seeing how many dishes on the menu don’t contain at least one of those. I swear, it’s a conspiracy.
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Yes it is. 😁
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It would be really difficult to forego my favorite McDonald’s sandwich- the McGriddle- but hey, the price was right as far as burgers and fries go so I’d live.
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Yes you would. We would buy two cheesburgers and toss one set of buns. This was before the double cheeseburger was launched. So good,
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I loves me a double cheeseburger. 🙂
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Yup. Me too.
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Wow 64 years? I have to wonder how different the burgers tasted compared to what they hsve now?
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I think the same. McDonalds was famous for buying ground beef that had a significent amount of what the called whole cow quality components (steaks etc)
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You want to know what’s scary! I remember when there was no such thing as a Big mac or a Quarter Pounder. I also remember the day when the nearest McDonalds was six hours away from the place I went to college at. We probably made more money that most dope pushers did by importing burgers from McDonalds. My room mates and I routinely turned $500.00 in three grand just by doing a burger run!
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Wow! McSmuggler. I remember the McDonalds in college. They were 15 cents and a beer was 25.
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Well done, John! This one must have been really fun to do. I had great flashbacks – what hamburger chain did the “Where’s the beef?” commercial with the grumpy old lady?
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That was Wendys. Great campaign.
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Good memory, John! It really was a good one.
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😁
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Yaa for Tiny!
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He’s here.
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I can’t help if the McGriddle number didn’t get added after yesterday’s Sorryless post 😉
I cannot believe those Golden Arches have been around so friggen long and have become so friggen identifiable almost everywhere in the world.
Great list!
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They certainly are, Dale. 🍟
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Lookit you, all emoji-savvy 😉
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I resembel that.Thanks, Dale.
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What? No smiley 🙂 no winkie 😉 😀
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Was typing one handed. Takes three fingers for the emojis and I was holding Twiggy. 😉
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Haha! Sure. Blame Twiggy… 🐶😊
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Easy to do. 😁
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Here’s #11 — Do not, under any circumstances, show up drunk at 1 a.m. and fall asleep while in the pickup line. At best, someone will wake you up and suggest you find a parking spot. At worst, the person behind you will make a video and call the cops, ensuring that you’ll be in a pickle rather than eating a pickle.
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There are so many stories of this happeming. LOL, Linda.
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The highlight of our trips to the city ( two hours away) was dinner at McDonalds. One time, my dad didn’t stop and no one talked to him all the way home, lol.
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I don’t blame you kids. Ha haha.
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been there!
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And a billion others.
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Awesome, John. I shall take you word on all these meals as I have never set foot inside a McDonald’s.
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You might be the only one on the planet. 😀
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Gosh! No asking for ketchup? I can’t image fries without ketchup. Such a small menu back then. Too much choice these days. About a McFlury? I’m guessing no ice-cream either?
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I would have to know what a McFiury is but my guess is no ice cream.
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I should have said ‘McFlurry’, John. The McFlurry is a brand of flavoured ice cream distributed by McDonald’s and first sold in Bathurst New Brunswick Canada in 1995. We’ll have to wait 40 years for one if we’re still in 1955.
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Yes we are still there. No wonder I hadn’t heard of it.
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#11) Whatever you do, don’t shout, “Hey, Ray, you don’t plan on usurping Richard and Maurice McDonald by stealing the company they created out from underneath them, do you?”
He might take offense to that, even though that’s exactly what he did eventually.
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I guess stealing is the right word although they got two million, it was not a lot in relation to the innovations they made.
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They were supposed to get a 1% royalty in perpetuity but when it came time to sign the deal, Ray Kroc just gave them a handshake deal which he never honored.
Plus, he opened a McDonald’s across the street from them since although he let them keep their McDonald’s, he didn’t actually give them the right to keep it open without a franchise agreement.
Ray Kroc was a monster.
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I agree.
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Ray Kroc was a milkshake machine salesman. (Those old kind with the big aluminum cup and the spindle hanging down.) Well, as legend has it, one of the customers on his route kept needing new machines. They were wearing them out from overuse. So, old Ray sticks around and watches their operation for a day of so. He couldn’t believe the business they were doing.
Then a light bulb turned on over his head. He propositioned the McDonald brothers (there were two of ’em) to go into business together and start a chain of their restaurants. Everything was going great fro a year or so, but then the brothers got cold feet or greedy or both and demanded Ray buy them out for a million dollars cash. He had to hustle around to find the money and it wasn’t easy because back in the late’ 50s, a million dollars was real money. He found the money and the rest you know.
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Thd amount was two million in earyly 60’s. Let’s just say the McDonalds and Ray were not fast friends.
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I should have read the comments directly above mine before posting. Well, alternate realities are what make the world go round.
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Yes they do. Still liked your comments.
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