This post originally ran on June 22, 2016. honey-do lists never go out of style.
The inspiration for this list has been several years of being the recipient of lists of things that needed fixing. I hope you enjoy it.
Top Ten Things Not to Do if You Get a Honey Do List
10 If you receive a honey do list, do not laugh at the items. If you do, at best, you’ll get one of those looks that turn brave thoughts to flee instincts. At worst, you’ll have to try to defend the undefendable fact that you haven’t kept up with normal maintenance. (The couch is pretty lumpy, wouldn’t you say?)
9 If you receive a honey do list, do not take shortcuts to complete the list. If you do, At best, the inspection will produce some embarrassing deficiencies. At worst, you find yourself in the do-over mode, and it will take longer than the original model would have taken. (Was that game you rushed to see worth it, Buster?)
8 If you receive a honey do list, do not try to substitute available materials for those that require a store trip. If you do, at best, the fix will last a month or two. At worst, you’ll find after the job definite evidence that you blew it. (How do you feel about a bedroom full of water? Bunky)
7 If you receive a honey do list, do not try to do it if you don’t know how. If you do, at best, you will need to call a pro to complete the work. At worst, you will need to call a pro to fix what you messed up and then finish the work. (Feel good about paying twice what the project would have cost in the first place?)
6 If you receive a honey do list, do not call your friends to help. If you do, at best, they will all but prevent the job from being completed. At worst, none of them will have the skills needed but will attempt to help with questionable results. (You did incur beer and food costs in addition to the repair of the repair costs, huh, Bud?)
5 If you receive a honey do list, do not ignore the instructions as to the desired outcome. If you do, at best, the job will never be satisfactory. At worst, your usual roundabout way of doing things will add time and cost to the project. (Maybe it wasn’t necessary to dig that hole and build a foundation for the flower box after all, right?)
4 If you receive a honey do list, do not fail to finish each item. If you do, at best, you will appear to be someone who needs planning help. At worst, you will be faced with someone who has been hired to complete what you start. (Man, those labor costs are killers, aren’t they?)
3 If you receive a honey do list, do not make excuses for not doing the items. If you do, at best, your excuses will fall on deaf ears. At worse, the excuses will be used as justification for engaging Expensive & How contracting. (What’s in a name? Whoa!)
2 If you receive a honey do list, do not put off getting to work on it immediately. If you do, at best, the list will only get longer. At worst, there will be a growing feeling that you will never get the list done, culminating in an introduction to Beaucoup Bucks & Sons. (Man, those sons sure have dirty shoes, don’t they?)
1 If you receive a honey do list, do not fail to report the results of projects completed. If you do, at best, there will be no record of accomplishment. At worst, you will not have confirmation that the job is complete, and it may just show up again. (You have to demonstrate you can get things done, Buford.)
Fiction Favorites 
Reblogged this on Die Erste Eslarner Zeitung – Aus und über Eslarn, sowie die bayerisch-tschechische Region!.
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Thank you for sharing today, Michael.
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Great list, John! Love the meme, too.
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I thought the meme was pretty typical. 😁
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I love the names of the contractors! 😀
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Thank you, Liz. 😁
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You’re welcome, John.
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Great meme and post, John! I need to send this list to my hubby😂🙂
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Good idea, Hamony. 😁
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“Brave thoughts to flee instincts.” Love it!
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Thank you, Joan. 😁
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I think we have those same contractors out here.
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They are nationwide.😁
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I’ve made some of these mistakes, John. I am getting better, though. A few more years and I’ll be off page one.
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Hahaha. I’ll never make that distinction, Dan. 😁
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I thought I might hold off on commenting, as I really was trying to find an excuse – but you covered that in # 3!! Thanks a lot, John! 🙄😏
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This situation is a “no excuse” zone. GP. 😳
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Then my goose is cooked.
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With a cranberry side dish.
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Of course!!
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🤣
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Not sure about #8. If it gives you some breathing room to get supplies then it could work. Depends on the pitch.
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Yes. Everytime I try to use something I already have it doesn’t work. It is like a conspiracy or something.
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Yup, hubby loves going to the store and buying all kinds of supplies and tools, which sit in a corner for years!! But he is ready. Of course, the paint is too old by the time he goes to use it, so another trip is required. It is a vicious circle.
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A man after my own heart. Thanks, Darlene. 😁
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Expensive and How Contracting . . . those guys suck!
As for enlisting your pals to help? Good advice Boss. All they’re usually good for is picking up the beer and grub YOU’RE paying for.
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So true. “Hey , John. What’s this tool used for?” “That’s a screwdriver, Bob.”
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And here I thought a screwdriver was vodka and orange juice . . .
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Well, that’s the best kind, anyway.
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Agreed
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Whilst I was living in Tanzania, a young man who worked for me proudly brought in and showed me the brand-new bicycle for which he had been on a waiting list for a couple of years. He immediately said he’d be taking it to the bicycle fundi (repair man) the following morning – there were loose spokes, everything was out of adjustment, and it needed a couple of hours’ work to bring it up to scratch. I told him not to do that; I had the necessary tools and the time, and I would happily do it for him to save him the expense. “But, Sir,” he said, “if you fix it, how will the bicycle fundi feed his children?”
We now live in an area where many people are struggling and there are a lot of self-employed trying to make ends meet. That’s why we pay window-cleaners, plumbers, electricians, garden designers and others to do things that we could probably do ourselves. The bicycle fundi must be able to feed his children.
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I would say he was a wise young man. We do the same.
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As a one-time writer of the Honey Do list… this is bang on. 😉
Beaucoup Bucks & Sons are muy expensive.
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They are muy expensive and not very good either. Thanks, Dale.
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It’s always the case, isn’t it? Sigh.
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Yes it is.
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I never actually write down my honey-do list. I prefer to nag!
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There you go. Sounds like a good system,. 😁
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My dad used to say the only way to be certain of never getting asked to do a job was to do such a lousy job at it that the other person felt the need to redo it to her own specifications. I think he was onto something!
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I think so too. Thanks, Debbie. 😁
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This list is all too familar and brought a smile to my Monday:)
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I’m glad, Denise.
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Love the names of the fictional companies, John:)
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Thank you, Becky. My favorite is the law firm of Bacon , Lattace, and Tomita.
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I especially liked Expensive & How contracting.
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Hahaha.
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A great list, John! And I love the cartoon! 🙂
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Thank you, Jan. I liked it too. 😁
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Timeless set, dear John! Just do it, Man! Anytime, anywhere! 😂😁😁
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Thank you, Maria. 🤣
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😁😁😁
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😊
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I love it, but I would like to add one:
If you receive a honey do list, do not respond as my late ex-husband did by saying, “I work 5 nights a week to support this family … can’t you learn to do anything for yourself???” (This was when the water pipes beneath the house had frozen and we had no water. I did fix it myself, though … I called a plumber!)
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Hahaha. I now know why he became an ex.
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One of the many reasons!!!
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I’m sure. 😊
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Beaucoup Bucks & Sons- hilarious! Thanks for the laughs, John.
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You are welcome. Thanks for letting me know you enjoyed it.
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My pleasure!
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😁
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I have a handyman on speed dial. Hubby is nowhere near handy around the house, lol.
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I think that is the best way. I actually called a plumber for the first time in my life. There was a leak in the kitchen faucet cut off and I couldn’t get the nut loose. $150.00 and five minutes later. . . done.
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#7 really resonates with me. When we first married and had no money, I tried to do everything myself. I often got to the end of the line and eventually figured something out even though the job took twice as long as it should have. Now that my eyes are so bad and I have less patience, I call the professionals. Paying to get something done right is worth the tradeoff for me as I don’t get aggravated that way.
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I think you are right. I still do stuff myself and carry the aggravation as a badge of honor. Thanks, Pete.
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This reminded me of something my pal Camille said many years ago…the reason a woman really needs a man is to go get ice cream in the middle of the night, to make sure the AC works and to hook up the VCR. I forgot these pearls of Camille wisdom till I read this.
I’m always impressed at how in depth these are…the trouble you take. It comforts when I feel like a schmuck penning one of my Did You Know pieces. I guess we’re just that way John…in depth across that Honey-Do list, even if you’re your own Honey. Always enjoy these. 🙂
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I think Camille had it right. I would add to go get coffee and croissants in the rain. I’m glad you enjoy these. As soon as I get this next book done I’ll go back to the historical posts. 😁
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I’ve never read these so, they’re all new to me.
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Yup. But I still like the historical ones.
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Fun to write, I know.
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Yes indeed.
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It shows.
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😊
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PS VCR…you see how many years it truly was.
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Hahahaha.
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Reblogged this on Author Don Massenzio and commented:
Check out another great list from John Howell via his Fiction Favorites blog titled: THE TOP TEN THINGS NOT TO DO IF YOU GET A HONEY-DO LIST
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Thank you for sharing, Don. 😊
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You’re welcome.
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I like the meme! He-Man’s line is ” I’ll get to it”. When he gets to it is anybody’s guess! 😂
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Hahaha. The question is does he ever get to it?
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So funny, John. I’ve never created a honey-do list, but I’ve asked for help with different projects. My sister used to complain non-stop about her husband not doing this or that, until I finally said, why don’t you do it yourself? 😀
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Good advice.
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There’s nothing sweet about the ‘honey-do’ list. 🙂
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You are so right. Many oppotunities to fail.
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I have a feeling this list is made from years of experience. 🙂
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Years of it, Pamela. 😁
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🙂 🙂 🙂
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If I were ever given a honey do list, I’d happily do one item a week (or maybe a month). No use rushing things. But fortunately, I’m perfect and there is never any things that need doing where I live.
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I can imagine. 🙄
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