Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Prompt – Body Parts

 

 

A picture of a string with drops of water- the logo for SoCSIt was fortunate to find a nice quiet spot in the park where listening to the birds and enjoying the absence of human voices was possible. Spreading out a blanket fashioned in the design of the tartan of my maternal Grandmother, who was an immigrant from Scotland, made the strange park scene seem like home. Then, settling back and taking a Topo Chico out of the cooler, the process of pecking away at the latest story began.

Out of the corner of my eye, there was a flash, but when looking directly, there was nothing. Since seeing things has been part of my life for eons, a shoulders shrug was followed by a return to work. While typing away, a feeling of not being alone crept over me. You may have had the feeling at one time. You know you want to turn around and look behind you but are very reluctant to do so since it might be something you don’t want to see. It became apparent that the birds felt keeping quiet was the better part of valor in the stillness.

That’s when the hair stood up on my neck, and my flight response kicked into high gear. Not able to move fast enough before being grabbed from behind by a big smelly beast.ย  Wanting to scream but prevented by a slippery hand sliding over my mouth, cutting off all sound. The calloused hand was wet with a slick substance that had a strong copper odor. Anyone who has read a horror story knows precisely what covered the hand.

The gag response decided to react to the smell, and after several involuntary moves, the beast released its grip.ย  It threw me to the ground and put a singular finger to its lips accompanied by a widening of the eyes that signaled for me to shut the hell up. Taking the opportunity to size up the beast, the first stunner was the impression that whoever made this thing used several different body parts. Neither arm matched. One was hairy and one smooth. The legs looked like they were taken from a horse. The head resembled a Yeti without the good looks. “What chew lookin’ at bub.” Were the first words spoken. I stammered that I had never seen anything like it before, and it explained that it was the new prototype USPS postal person.

Immediately a thought came to mind about the blood on its hands. It explained that the last delivery was a side of beef, and it had not had a chance to wash up. The thing finally handed me an envelope and inside I found a message from Linda Hill. It read

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “body parts.” Pick a body part and talk about it. Make sure to leave a comment below or put a disclaimer at the top of your post if it’s NSFW! There are people who participate in SoCS and love to support others, but not everyone will want to read about private parts. Have fun!

If you would like to have, fun visit Linda’s blog and read how easy it is. Here is the link.

https://lindaghill.com/2021/10/22/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-october-23-2021/

Body Parts by John W. Howell ยฉ 2021

“So who made the monster out of body parts?”

“I think the feds.”

“Legs from a horse?”

“Fast delivery.”

“OMG. You have finally flipped.”

“Come on it’s a stupid story.”

“Where did the USPS monster go?”

“Had more rounds.”

“Side of beef?”

“Neither rain, sleet, snow, dead of night, or cow carcass will keep them from their appointed rounds.”

“I need a drink after all that.”

“Should I call the USPS?”

“I think I’m going to use UPS from now on.’

“It’s fiction for heaven’s sake.”

“Just the same.”

“I think I’m going to have a VooDoo Ranger IPA.”

“To go with your warped sense of fiction.”

59 comments

  1. As I was reading this, I saw on the monitor displaying one of our security cameras, a wasp landed on the lens and spent some time sniffing around. I don’t know which was more scary, that ten-inch-long wasp or your federally-mandated multi-species amalgam of a postman. Happily, I was protected from both by high-definition screens! Have a good weekend, John.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I’m glad none of my sillyness got in to you. I can imagine the wasp was a treat though. Thanks, Keith.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I love “your warped sense of fiction”!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Liz.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome, John.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Gwen M. Plano · · Reply

    I loved your final line, John. And the story itself brought plenty of smiles. Have some fun today and stay clear of the monsters. They seem to be particularly nasty this pumpkin season. ๐Ÿ˜

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree. I must admit I was influenced by them. Have a peaceful Saturday, Gwen.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Another great story, John! Happy Saturday!

    Like

    1. Thank you, Jill. Happy Saturday to you *sung to the tune of Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Derek and I love that song! xo

        Like

  5. I think I’ll go have a drink now too! lol

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Good idea. We need to get that visual out of our brain. Margaritas are the best brain erasers there is. ๐Ÿคฃ Thanks, GP.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Three fingers. Take it and find a quiet safe place to tranquilize your vivid imagination. Be well…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you , John. I need a quiet place.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I was ready for a drink before we got to the prompt! Good work, John. Now, where did I put my good arm?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha. I think you left it on the sawhorse in the garage. ๐Ÿ˜ณ

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for sharing, Michael.

      Like

  8. What another wonderful story! Reading the headline a similar thought was in my mind. With Twiggy and Lucy as actors in horror. ๐Ÿ˜‰ Now I know why you like whiskey too. It’s the Scottish genes. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I still have to look for myself. Have a nice weekend, John! xx Michael

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Michael. Yes 1/2 Scot gets you whiskey. ๐Ÿ˜

      Like

  9. “Warped sense of fiction,” indeed. ๐Ÿ™‚ Fortunately, (I suppose), our USPS guy is ordinary and friendly. Good one, John. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That is a good thiing, Tim. Ours leaves the mailbox open. ๐Ÿ˜

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Think cow carcasses would stop me. Especially if they’re in the same category as snow, sleet, and other things that fall from the sky.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I can see the weather warning now. “A possibility of heavy falling cows until 10:00 PM.”

      Like

      1. Definitely time to stay indoors. Umbrellas wouldnโ€™t be enough.

        Liked by 1 person

  11. As long as the random body parts are not part of the delivery, Iโ€™m okay with your USPS creature. Well, the bloody envelope is a little off putting – ha – and itโ€™s ability to find you in the park! Another successful SoCS post, John!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Maggie. ๐Ÿ˜

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You are welcome, John.

        Liked by 1 person

  12. First off, have you considered the witness protection program to protect you from Linda’s mail deliveries? And as for the story, you are a mad scientist my man.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ve been told that, Pilgrim. Makes me glad to know there is a reason I do this.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. For shizzle.

        Liked by 1 person

  13. Yessiree…a strong IPA is definitely deserves. What an amazing story…you had me in your blood soaked grip.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Fantastic flash fiction, John!! What a monster! Great job!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Jan

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Very good, John. Your SOCS posts are a real treat.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so glad you like them, Robbie. Thank you for letting me know. ๐Ÿ˜Š

      Liked by 1 person

  16. This is great, John, and after reading, I think it’s wine time. ๐Ÿท๐Ÿ˜

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Excellent storytelling sir! The nuisances like the Topo Chico & birds in the park juxtaposed to the postal Frankenstein is genius. I smelled copper as I read the words too.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Jill. Sometimes those olfactory hallucinations are a bear. ๐Ÿ˜

      Liked by 1 person

  18. You know what you have created? With all your intros getting more and more farfetched, I find myself trying to figure out just what Linda Hill’s prompt will be!! I never imagined body parts, I have to say…
    You are bona fide… love these!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Dale. The intros are supposed to be a little obscure. I’m glad you enjoy them. ๐Ÿ˜

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh, I don’t doubt that! I still try! ๐Ÿ˜‰

        Liked by 1 person

  19. D.L. Finn, Author · · Reply

    It’s time to worry when the birds go silent ๐Ÿ™‚ Good one.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You know it is something big. Thanks, Denise. ๐Ÿ˜

      Like

  20. The new prototype USPS person… I love it! This was great, John!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Jennie.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome, John.

        Liked by 1 person

  21. Ah..hahahaha! Love your sense of humour! Great post for Hallowe’en!
    Body parts, my foot!
    No, I’m serious. Where’d my foot go?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s over there with the boots. Gotta be careful how you kick them off.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Kick … boots…YEAH!

        Liked by 1 person

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