Top Ten Things Not to Do While Watching Competition Shows.

Image by Barry D from Pixabay

This post was published on September 12th, 2016. Let’s hope it has legs.

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The inspiration for this list came to me while watching a few shows where people compete for money, a hosting berth on a food show, to see if they would like to sell or list their house, or just want a new place to live. I did not know what to call these shows, so I labeled them competition shows. Anyway, I think you get the idea.

10 If you are watching a competition show and it involves food, do not think you need to match bite for bite. If you do, at best, you’ll be too full to sleep. At worst, your doctor will conduct an intervention and perhaps admit you to a sanitarium to lose weight. (Man, that first 100 pounds came quick, didn’t it?)

9 If you are watching a competition show that involves racing from one place to the next, do not think you need to rush to the store after it is over. If you do, at best, the kindly officer will let you off with a warning after he hears your story. At worst, your insurance company will not reinstate your policy in spite of your promise to get rid of the racing gloves. (You would have been okay had you not slid sideways into the 7-11.)

8 If you are watching a competition show and the players are all on an island with no food, do not plan your vacation while watching. If you do, at best, your room choices will seem luxurious when in fact, they should be condemned. At worst, you’ll arrive at your destination and realize that primitive camp living might not have been the best option. (Especially since your family considers roughing it to be no room service.)

7 If you are watching a competition show and the favorite day of the show is demolition day, do not tackle that small home improvement. If you do, at best, you will spend three minutes on demolition and ten days on reconstruction. At worst, your demolition fever will go unchecked until you realize you have no more bedrooms. (That night sky is sure filled with stars, isn’t it?)

6 If you are watching a competition show and the principles pay for rundown houses with cash, do not make an offer on a house. If you do, at best, you will overlook some needed repairs. At worst, you will realize there is no one to help you with what has been described as a “tear down.” (It looked so easy on TV, didn’t it, Bunky?)

5 If you are watching a competition show and the homeowners are asked if they love it or should they list it? Do not call an agent to list your house. If you do, at best, you will have second thoughts about your beloved home. At worst, your house will sell in two days with the new owners wanting to move in a week, and you have nowhere to go. (How come everything for sale is higher priced than what you got for your house? Huh?)

4 If you are watching a competition show and there are judges eliminating chefs, do not decide you can cook better than all of them. If you do, at best, your offerings may not be enthusiastically received. At worst, you will have a food walkout at your house, and you’ll be the last chef standing. (Seems kind of lonely, just you and that pot of stew.)

3 If you are watching a competition show and it involves food trucks, do not think that may be an easy way to make a buck. If you do, at best, your first week will be a killer. At worst, after you spend all that money to buy the truck, you realize you can’t sell the truck. (Kind of cramped to live in, right?)

2 If you are watching a competition show that involves two guys giving the homeowner a complete makeover for $30,000, do not ask for bids on your remodel. If you do, at best, you’ll never get a price low enough to proceed. At worst, you will find someone to do the job at your price and have to hire another contractor to redo the job at twice the price. (All looked good until the ceiling fell. Right?)

1 If you are watching a competition show that involves selecting a home from three choices of houses, do not think you will be that lucky. If you do, At best, you will need to see more. At worst, you will look at three, pick one, and discover that a better house has come on the market and is cheaper. (So much for being in a rush, huh, Rube?)

61 comments

  1. Old What’s Her Face is addicted to these shows.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It is amazing to me that this was written in 2016 and the shows are still being broadcasted today. Thanks Craig.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Inexpensive to produce. No actors, no script, no closing streets to film.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I don’t watch those shows, John, but I enjoyed the list and must say # 9 gave me the biggest laugh! You have a knack for putting reality down on paper!! 🤪😲😬😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, GP. Obviously I have watched these shows at least once. 😁

      Liked by 1 person

      1. haha, obviously!!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Those shows seem more dangerous than I realized.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You have to be careful, Charles. 😁

      Like

  4. I do not watch these shows. People think they are winning something they are not…false or incomplete information. I like your points and wish everyone would read them. “If it is too good to be true, it probably is not true.” I’m sounding pretty negative here!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s okay. There are good comments that come out of critical thinking. (My term for negative ) Thanks, Karen.

      Like

  5. I’ve never watched these shows. I think your list is probably better!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha ha ha. Thanks, Jill. 😁

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I think I’ve watched all of those competition shows expect for the survivalist one. I agree that they fall into the category of “Don’t try this at home, kids.”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I saw the original survival show and then said, “No more.”

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I don’t blame you. Just seeing news reports of it was bad enough.

        Liked by 2 people

  7. The expression “your mileage may vary” comes to mind. Good advice, John.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes it does. Thanks, Dan

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Gwen M. Plano · · Reply

    I don’t watch these shows, but your advice sounds right on, John. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Gwen. 😁

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Good advice, John. I’ll try my best to stay in my own reality and keep in mind who I am. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes. Look in the mirror once in a while. Thanks, Tim

      Liked by 1 person

  10. And let’s not forget competition shows like Jeopardy. Yes I’m a huge fan.
    When you get one or two right and feel like a genius and the next category is 16th century kings or who ruled Dipcanistank in the 1600’s?
    When I shout out the answers, (right or wrong) my wife thinks I’m nuts.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Tom. I’ve been known to yell out an answer myself. Nuts is as nuts does.

      Like

  11. The only reality show we watch is Survivor, and #8 hits the bullseye for us. We’re not fans of camping, and roughing it for us is no room service or cable TV, lol.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m with you. 😁

      Liked by 1 person

  12. I enjoy the cooking shows to see if there is something I would make. And then they throw in some crazy ingredient that no one would ever put in a baked good and I think, why.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Im with you….Why? Thanks, Michele.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. I got a kick out of #4 and #3. Why do these “fantasy competitions” seem to bring out the worst in our own competitive spirits? Nicely handled, John.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think the term is “cutthroat.” Thanks, Debbie.

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Aw, come on, John. I’m sure my stews not that bad [smile].

    Liked by 1 person

  15. D.L. Finn, Author · · Reply

    I msy have.watched a show or two 🙂 I’m not one for roughing it or being a chef though fun list!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Denise.

      Like

  16. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a post from Charles, so I brought this here…
    https://charlesfrenchonwordsreadingandwriting.wordpress.com/2022/07/11/its-time-for-a-july-self-promotion-party/

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, GP. 😁

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Years ago my wife and I would occasionally watch cooking shows…that is, when they were about actual cooking. Now, there seems to be about 100 cooking competition shows and rare is the show where they just…cook. And so often, “reality tv” shows are just as scripted as scripted shows are. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree, Bruce. I think Julia was the last.

      Liked by 1 person

  18. If you did buy a food truck, you better have designated locations close by or you’ll be blowing your entire budget on gas!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So true. Maybe one that runs on propane. Oops that’s up there too.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You can’t win these days! LOL

        Liked by 1 person

      2. No that’s certain.

        Like

  19. It’s crazy the number of competitions on the boob tube, eh?
    Makes you wonder how many people do not heed your rules…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes that would be an interesting postscript. Thanks, Dale.

      Liked by 1 person

  20. The Amazing Race always interested me, mostly the locations not the racing bit. Ha. Wouldn’t have made a good partner!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree it was interesting but haven’t seen it for years.

      Like

  21. petespringerauthor · · Reply

    #10 makes me think of that hot dog eating contest they hold every 4th of July. What a great country—being rewarded for eating.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Yep it still has legs. Thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

  23. So funny!!!

    Like

  24. […] Top Ten Things Not to Do While Watching Competition Shows. […]

    Like

    1. Thank you for sharing my post, Emma.

      Like

  25. Oh, it has legs…funny ones!

    This is very amusing, John. I like all 10!
    I never watch competition shows, and you’ve pretty much covered why. 🙄🤔 I

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha ha ha. I don’t blame you. They are pretty lame. Thanks, Resa.

      Liked by 1 person

  26. One question (maybe two): Why does everyone want to be on TV? And why debase themselves to do so?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Cause they don’t know how to write and they are looking for 15 minutes of fame no matter how debased those 15 minutes are. Good questions, Andrew.

      Liked by 1 person

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