This list ran on October 16th, 2017. Since folks still get bored, it may come in handy.
* * *
This list was inspired by a daydreaming session during which I wondered what it would be like to be bored and then make some bad choices as a result. I hope you like it.
10 If you are bored, do not attend a city council meeting. If you do at best, you’ll get a needed nap. At worst, you will attempt to liven things up with an outrageous proposal. ( You didn’t think the idea of a five-year-old taking over the mayor’s job would gain traction, did you, Dylan? You make being the laughing stock look like a legitimate profession.)
9 If you are bored, do not go to the grocery store. If you do, at best, you will hope the paper goods section has been moved, but only to find it hasn’t. At worst, you will fill your cart and jump into the ten items or less line manned by Tiny, the WWF champ. Tiny was just told by the manager that he is too soft when demanding compliance with the ten-or-under rule. (You did hold your own for a while there, Drake.)
8 If you are bored, do not go to the park to watch a chess match. If you do, at best, one of the players will move a piece. At worst, you will be lucky to observe two well-matched players for what turns into a ten-hour match. (I’m unsure what you were expecting, Douglass, but this is not a contact sport.)
7 If you are bored, do not turn on reruns of the 90’s show “Cop Rock.” If you do, at best, you’ll fall into a deep sleep. At worst, about mid-episode, you will suddenly realize watching paint dry is better than this. ( Thinking that you like music and cop shows, you thought this would be a winner, right, Dean?)
6 If you are bored, do not take up a hobby that has been identified as most boring. If you do, at best, you’ll snap out of it. At worst, your family will set up an intervention to stop your traffic cone collection activities. (Just because the living room is filled with traffic cones, you didn’t see the hospitalization coming, did you, Dexter?)
5 If you are bored, do not take up a hobby like bungee jumping. If you do, at best, you’ll chicken out before the first jump. At worst, you’ll make a jump and then have to buy numerous copies of the video where you are screaming like a baby. (Oops. You missed the one that went viral on YouTube, Duke.)
4 If you are bored, do not go to Las Vegas for some excitement. If you do, at best, your first thousand-dollar loss will cure you. At worst, you put your life savings on the black spot at the roulette wheel just for kicks. (Retirement is now put off until you are eighty-two, Drew?) Editor’s note – Unfortunate alliteration.
3 If you are bored, do not plan to visit North Dakota. If you do, at best, you’ll go in the summer. At worst, you’ll be caught in the snow and can look forward to playing solitaire until May. (Hopefully, you’ll have a deck of fifty-two, Dalton.)
2 If you are bored, do not organize something. If you do, at best, it will be a half-hearted effort. At worst, you will get so wrapped up in the organization that you’ll take on signs of a classic OCD attack. (Just put that paper anywhere, Darren. You’ll never look at it again anyway.)
1 If you are bored, do not look up a list of what to do if you are bored. If you do, at best, the list may be extensive. At worst, you might do one of the items like “download the Bitmoji app. Make your personalized emoji, and then send all your friends fun cartoon texts.”* (Wonder where your friends went, Dane?)
*From 96 Things to Do When You’re Bored by Katie Sweeney. An excellent list of things to do.
Fiction Favorites 
Great list, John. Plenty of chuckles today. In a couple of hours, I have to get my car serviced. The minutes drag in the waiting room – but I’ll be armed with my Kindle. 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
I absolutely loathe the service waiting room. When we lived in San Antonio they would come get the car and then bring it back. Loved that. Have a good one, Gwen. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Worse yet for No. 10, John. At best you may end up on a committee. At worst, you may end up the Chairman – that happened to someone writing this comment.
Great list, but too late to save me. I hope you have a great week.
LikeLiked by 2 people
That would be an unfortunate occurrence. I’ll bet you made a great chairman.😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
The worst part was that when I told my wife I was going to go, she said: “Promise me you won’t speak.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
LOL. Love that.
LikeLiked by 1 person
My plan is to always go back to bed and hope for motivation when I wake up.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I could subscribe to that plan as well. Thanks, Charles.
LikeLike
I started cracking up on # 5, then saw myself in # 2 and # 3. Oops, I think I must be sending out too many Christmas gif’s.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha ha. Thanks, GP. Your gifs are great.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am often bored these days, but don’t have the time to give in to those urges.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Double whammy. Bored and busy. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Same here, Craig!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ha ha ha.
LikeLiked by 1 person
😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
There’s always alphabetizing the spice rack and refusing to throw out the spices that expired 30 years ago.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yup or going into that “junk Drawer” and getting rid of the junk.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, but what if I need that junk some day?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well…Maybe buy new.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s my husband’s response!
LikeLike
If feel that doing #1 could be entering an infinity loop that will capture me and never let me go, so I’m carefully walking away. (Like I did about that guy with the sharp scythe.)
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hear you. That app can keep you mesmerized for hours.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, John, dealing with boredom has to be thoughtful.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes boredom is a subject that should be approached with caution. Thanks, Tim
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is a great list. If I’m ever bored, I’ll consult it immediately!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Somehow it doesn’t sound like you ever get bored.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great list – I hope I never get bored!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I don’t think you are the type.
LikeLike
As long as I have my Kindle I’m never bored.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I can’t imagine you being bored ever.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m rarely bored, John, but this is a fine list for those who are. I imagine I’ve simply got far too much on my plate to have time for being bored … that, plus boredom just isn’t in my nature.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I can believe you are like the Eveready bunny.
LikeLiked by 1 person
LOL, I am. Truly! I’m just blessed that way, and I know it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
😁
LikeLike
If you are bored, never read a technical manual. If you do, at best, you will fall into a fatal coma. At worst, you will find it not only interesting, but exhilarating, which is the kind of self-discovery that no one should ever experience.
LikeLike
Great add, Greg. I never met a technical manual that I couldn’t live without.
LikeLike
OK. Got it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love these. I’ll definitely take your advice on bungee jumping! It wouldn’t end well!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Something none of us should do.
LikeLiked by 1 person
A very diverse list of things NOT to do. Hope your Christmas holidays are better than that.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Of course, I don’t have time to be bored.
LikeLike
New Year’s Day is a good day to be bored if you are as disinterested in football as I am.
LikeLike
Still love to watch Notre Dame if they are playing.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I will save this list for a time I’m bored.. I’d like to be bored for a day.. lol 😆
LikeLiked by 1 person
That would be a treat. Maybe someone should make a day for bordom.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I totally agree!!!!❣️
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha ha
LikeLike
If you are bored, do not try to pull the tail out of the mouth of that animal above. At best, you might incur an annoyed roar. At worst, you might change places with the tail! 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very clever, Pit. 😁
LikeLike
Nothing boring about your amusing list! Thank you for the laughs. 😄
LikeLiked by 1 person
AW Thanks for telling me you got some laughs
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, and your post reminded me of my middle school English teacher who said, “Only boring people get bored.” Never too far from my thoughts as her words stuck with me.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That is so true, Michele. Great advice she gave you and lovely memories as well.
LikeLike
Yes! Seems like she just spoke those words and yet it has been a lifetime of honoring them. ✨🙏🏻🙏🏻
LikeLike
That is what is so wonderful about folks who give us light on the path. 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊
LikeLike
I was going to attend the next city council meeting, but I’d rather watch paint dry. 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think paint might be more entertaining,
LikeLiked by 1 person
So are you saying that North Dakota is boring? The North Dakotans may not be happy to hear that. I have never been to North Dakota so I don’t know.
LikeLike
I’m saying if you go to North Dakota go in the summer. The winters are brutal. I didn’t mention the people at all.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Funny how many of these activities will put a person to sleep if they are bored 😉 Number 1 really resonates with me. When I am bored, I need to stay away from the App Store!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha ha. I can identify.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Bwahahahaha, and here I thought attending city council meetings was the direct path to boredom. Great list, John! Thanks for the giggles.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m glad you enjoyed it, Monika. Thanks for letting me know. 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Being bored can led to not so good decisions. Very helpful!
LikeLike
I feel as if bungee jumping because you’re bored is sort of like setting yourself on fire because you’re cold. Nope! And as far as Vegas goes, it was a great time . . once.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha ha. Love that.
LikeLiked by 1 person
So funny! No bungee jumping- promise.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good for you. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person