The coffee machine leaves a message to watch the time after pressing my order. The 10 oz coffee order is pressed and the cup is filled in ten seconds. A message comes back that the machine will try for a new record tomorrow. With a shoulder shrug and a sip, the clock is the next item of concern. The setting is for Chicago on March 8th, 1925. The duration is an hour. The plunger is pulled and we find ourselves at the Chicago Department of Public Health.
Dr. Herman N. Bundesen, Commissioner of the Chicago Department of Public Health announced in an article in the Department’s weekly bulletin that the ongoing crossword puzzle fad caused no ill health effects from headaches or eye strain, as had previously been feared, and was beneficial to health in general. The Commissioner reads from the bulletin to the employees gathered in the cafeteria. In a feature titled “Cross-Worditis”, Bundesen humorously noted, “The savage little cross-word microbe may be largely explained by the fact that part of our lives and much energy must be put into amusement, to satisfy the play instinct within us. Therefore, any game with a mental ‘kick’ in it is quickly accepted and eagerly pursued. A collective sigh went up from the crowd, and all continued drinking coffee and working on their crossword puzzles.
The alarm goes off and we end up on the couch. A text has come in from Linda Hill. It reads: Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “open book, close eyes, point, write.” When you’re ready to sit down and write your SoCS post, open the closest printed matter, close your eyes, point to a word, and use it as your prompt. Use it any way you’d like. Have fun! Following directions, I open and point at a page of GQ Magazine. My finger lands on the word “watch” in a Cartier Timepiece Advertisement.
To see what others have written visit Linda’s blog. Here is the link: https://lindaghill.com/2025/03/07/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-8-2025/
Watch by John W. Howell © 2025
“That was an interesting trip. Can’t imagine folks getting concerned about crossword puzzles.”
“Well you know how some feel anything enjoyable must be bad for you.”
“Lucky you had that GQ magazine near.”
“I had been reading it before starting to write the post.”
“You still read that mag.”
“I must admit the editorial mission of GQ has moved beyond me.”
“How so?”
“Take the watch as an example. I have an Apple watch that does everything, including calling the authorities if I fall down and can’t get up.”
“Okay but there are other things.”
“Yeah like shoes that cost a thousand bucks, not to mention grill work for my front teeth.”
“Grill work?”
“A lot of the features are with guys who have a lot of gold and silver teeth.”
“That can’t be true.”
“Besides, I think the age demographic is more around my grandkids’ age.”
“I could see you hanging out with a gold grill, Cartier watch, neck chains, and Louboutin shoes.”
“Yeah right. Try wrangler jeans, t-shirt, and bare feet.”
“Not a pretty picture, old man. Why do you get the mag anyway?”
“I think staying current is understanding what is current and not necessarily joining in.”
“Speaking of current.”
“Did you order an Uber?”
“Right over there.”
Photo by Dan Antion
“Hold on. We all have to sit upfront.”
“Unless you want to sit in the bed.”
“That door looks strange.”
“It does. It is off a GMC Denali.”
“Gotta admit the guy is resourceful.”
“He gave us a break on the fare.”
“What’s the catch?”
“We have to help him deliver some mulch.”
“Not so bad.”
“Good let’s go. Oh by the way.”
“What?”
“It’s really manure.”
“Figures. Those Rangers are going to go down easy after this.”
“My thought exactly. Also, we might need hip boots.”
Fiction Favorites 
Dear John
Come around, we need some manure for our garden.
Happy weekend
The Fab Four of Cley
🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂
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I’ll be there in six weeks, provided I can pass the customs inspector with a truck load of manure.😊
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GREAT! 👍
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Loved how you ended it with the hip boots! Do you think they’ll be high enough? 😂
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I certainly hope so. Thanks, Dan. 😀
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Now I have no excuse for skipping the crossword puzzle. What’s the deal with Wrangler jeans? They are my favorite brand, but they aren’t easy to find around here.
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I buy mine online at Wrangler.com.
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That’s where my wife found them for me.
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The Producer did as well.
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The GQ Magazine was a surprise!
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Long time subscriber. 😀
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I’m with you as far as staying current Boss, even if a lot of the fare available these days is either behind a paywall or not up my alley. It’s still important to know where people are coming from.
As for the truck, Imma take it!
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The truck is a hoot isn’t it? Love that door. 😀
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Hahaha! Me too.
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I can see going to a chop shop and saying “Just give me a door that fits.”
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Not that you’ve ever done such a thing . . . .
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I did fashion Lakers out of old gas tank necks and screw on gas caps.
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Bahahahaha!
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😀
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I agree, we all need to keep current. We can become dated very quickly. I chuckled reading that 100 years ago there was a concern that doing crossword puzzles could be bad for your health.
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I found that fantastic too. There will be way more to worry about in four short years than the effects of crossword puzzles. Thanks, Darlene.
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What a great post! I never much liked crosswords despite loving words in general. Meanings origins, etc. And there you go again painting pictures with your words. I can visualize you in either style. Good thing I can’t smell the manure though. Happy Saturday John hope it’s a good one.
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Thank you, Jill. I’m so gald you can’t smell that manure. I have Vicks Vap O Rub under my nose so I don’t notice. Have a great Sunday.
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I live in a family of female crossword fanatics. The ones in the WSJ strain your eyes. As for the Uber, the someone who has to sit in the back better wear some protective gear and hope the place the ‘mulch’ gets delivered has a hose.
GQ is an interesting way to keep current!
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Thank you, Noelle. You have great advice. Yes, GQ is a way to stay current. Thanks.
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Thinking crossword puzzles can cause health problems is strange to me. Delivering manure may make you want more Rangers.
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I think delivering manure requires more Rangers. Thanks, Tim.
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Why does this make me think humans have always been and will always be scared of everything new?
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Cause what you think is true. Humans generally hate change and so there is a fear connection.
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I love the crossword assessment. And here I thought urinating in someone else’s Cheerios was a new development.
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Nope. Humans have been doing that for eons.
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From GQ to Manure, hmmmm. Yes, a lot of the magazines that I used to enjoy are now rather …. uninteresting to me. Rather prosaic and dull, to be honest. I don’t think that’s the way they used to be, really. It’s not my age, it’s the younger set whose perspective is so different than ours used to be. I’m writing this in an unedited stream. Thanks for the inspiration. 🙂 P.S. I’ve never ordered an Uber, and now I know why.
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Great sentence, Pam. Not age but changing perspectives. I love it. 😊
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Crossword-itis…Ha! That’s a new one. Fun trip back in time today. And fun Uber ride! 🙂
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Glad you liked it, Jan. 😀
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Part of my morning routine: Wordle, Mini-Crossword (the free version. I’m too cheap to pay NYT to do a puzzle!) and Spelling Bee. I have to hold myself back for doing all the puzzles in our local newspaper. Word puzzles have always held a huge fascination for me.
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Keeps the mind active too. Thanks for sharing, Lois.
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Ahh, gotcha there with the old manure delivery. Now I want to work on a crossword puzzle lolol. Already got the coffee drinking part down! 😀 Happy Saturday, John! ☕️
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The coffee part is the most important. Thank you, Laura.
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Indeed, you are correct! 😀
☕️ ☕️ ☕️
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😀
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Hello there. I do a crossword puzzle just about every day. They relax me, and maybe keep the brain cells in decent shape. I bow down before crossword puzzles!
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The crossword puzzle is a strong draw for sure. Thanks, Neil.
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“We have to help deliver some mulch” 😂🤣🤣
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I know right?
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From the pages of GQ to a truck full of manure. Well done, John! Is GQ even still around? I know about the LAGQ- Los Angeles Guitar Quartet.
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Yes, GQ is still around. Have a super Sunday, Jo.
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Very imaginative, John.
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Thank you, Pat
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Mulch does sound more appealing than manure, or more tolerable. 😷 Either would be fine for a discount!
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😀
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Tio’s sums it up:
““Well you know how some feel anything enjoyable must be bad for you.”
I’m set on manure around here trust me so if you need more, hit me up.🤙 😂
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If we need more manure I’ll give you a call. 😀
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♥️😂❤️
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😀
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Bravo for reading your mag. I especially found this observation in it especially dynamic this day and age: “part of our lives and much energy must be put into amusement, to satisfy the play instinct within us. Therefore, any game with a mental ‘kick’ in it is quickly accepted and eagerly pursued. When you look around and see people walking their dogs but looking down at their phone you have to wonder if they are satisfying their need for amusement when their eyes are so glazed over as the real world goes on around them. Great fulfillment of the challenge, John.
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I thought the article was fascinating and timely. Thank you, Monika.
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And that is why you are rockin’ your Golden Age, John. You keep yourself relevant and in the know. It’s the difference between being a doddering old fart and a bright and interesting gent. And you are that in spades.
As for the ride, I have to admit it’s kinda cool and definitely made those VooDoos merited!
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I found that I got about six shovelfuls to the bottle.
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Hahahaha!
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😀
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GQ must give you insight into the young world, but sticking with your jeans and t-shirt is wise. Gold teeth at our age – nah! People were worried about doing crossword puzzles? Hats off to the Commissioner.
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I would wonder about clinking glasses. I’ll stick with my naturals. Thanks, Jennie.
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Me, too. Best to you, John.
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😀
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I enjoy the health check on the crossword John!
GQ magazine a blast from the past!
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Thanks, Willow. GQ is still around.
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That’s right! Crosswords were a big fad in the 20’s. I did know that, but forgot.
Crossworditis? Hmm.. what about OXitis? I wonder if there are tOXic effects?
Think I’ll look that up in the OXford encyclopedia of linguistics.
Hey, I found an amazing fOXes mural yesterday.
I like doing crosswords, but I just don’t have time.
Art (humour is an art) is way more fun.
This is now a 5 OX comment.
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I love your five OX comment. Let me set down my bagel and LOX, and get myself out of a bOX. In order to match your accomplishment I have to show some mOXie. I think I will use Websters as a prOXy and Paul Simon’s song The BOXer to detOX my creative mind. That’s six
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I’ll be back with 7!
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All different. (i just made that rule.)
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I’ll be back…again..
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Can’t wait. I will be gone for a week starting today. 😊X
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O(X) kay! 🐂
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😊X
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I like crosswords, but the easy ones. It’s a good thing you’re a jeans and T-shirt guys because a GQ ensemble wouldn’t be good attire for the Uber ride and help required for the ride. 😊
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You are so right, Deborah. Gotta dress down for that ride. 😀
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