“Hey, you guys. It’s Friday. Let’s boogie.” “They are ignoring us Little One.”
FRIDAY IS HERE. Goodness, that was my outside voice. It is good to see Friday again.
Not too much new to report. I am still experimenting with Amazon on My GRL and lost money. My keywords were right. The Ad message was right. The bids were right if slightly too high. I got an unprecedented number of clickthroughs, but the actual sales were below expectations. I redid the blurb and continued. The only thing that has not been tweaked is the cover. I may have to consider a new cover but will do further testing to see for sure.
My office bookcases and credenza has arrived and only lacks a desk. I guess soon there will be no more excuses for not jumping into the WIP with both feet. Not sure on the desk arrival but it should be soon, so I have some procrastination room left.
Our bed is supposed to arrive on Monday. Now maybe we can get the box springs off the floor and the rug properly placed. Since this has been a two month deal thee are no breaths being held.
The fence guys put us off for a few days. We have had tons of rain, so it’s not a surprise. The landscape plan is done, and now we need some bids. The patio furniture is due for delivery within the next two weeks. We have a patio already in so we don’t need landscaping. Once the fence is in it will be nice to go onto the patio knowing the dogs won’t be able to get away.
Todays JohnKu talks about working your plan through to completion. (which is an objective we are getting near.) I hope you all have a lovely weekend.
Today Twiggy decided to get involved in the cleaning process. Whether it was curiosity or a Don Quixote move I can’t tell. Let ‘s just follow her and find out.
“So there you are soul sucker.”
“I want you to know I fear no evil.”
“Yeah sure. Come at me if you dare.”
“I hope you know better than to go after my toy.”
“I’m not afraid of no ghost. Excuse me but I need my rest.”
“Hey, Twiggy.”
“Yes, Dad.”
“Could you pick up your toys so I can get that corner?”
“Dad. Do you see an opposable thumb on these paws?”
“Uh, Twiggy. Looks like something followed you in here.”
“Yeah, ignore it. Lucy. It’s Dad doing the vacuuming.”
“I heard you talking to it in the other room.”
“Yeah, I was trying to make up an adventure. Dad spoiled it.”
“What happened?”
“Dad asked me to pick up my toys.”
“Ah. Buzzkill.”
“Well, ladies. I’m finished.”
“Not too soon either, Boss.”
“Maybe next time I can do a Man of LaMancha drama.”
“So Lucy what day is it?” “Can’t you tell by my demeanor?” “Wednesday, right?” “Right.”
It is Wednesday Story Day again, and last week Andrew and Larry discovered two phone calls made from Ned’s cell to Janice. The calls were brief but did prove they contacted each other at the time of Rafferty’s death. Of course, evidence of a conspiracy to commit murder will take more than two brief phone calls. Larry believes the two met and probably out of town. So he and Andrew are going to start with the airlines to see if any bookings have been made. Let’s get back to Larry’s office to check on the status.
“Here is your latte. Find anything?”
“Oh, man. There have to be thousands of reservations.”
“You centered on the few days before Rafferty’s murder?”
“I am. The problem is Boston has about 16,000 flights leaving every month. Some domestic and some foreign. So far no hits on Ned or Janice.”
“Could they be using false names?”
“Yeah, of course. That only makes the job tougher.”
“How about phone numbers? Don’t you have to give your phone number when you make a reservation?”
“Most airlines require it.”
“Search by phone number then.”
“This could take a while. The ticket database is huge and slow as hell.”
“Give it a try.”
“Done.”
“What’s it doing?”
“That annoying pinwheel.”
“Well, it is processing. Did you put in a date range as another filter?”
“Yup. We need to be patient.”
“Not your finest virtue.”
“Yeah, I know. Where’d you get this Latte?”
“Around the corner. “
“Sammy’s place?”
“Yes.”
“I should have known. Sammy’s is a sandwich shop, not a coffee house.”
“What? It’s no good.”
“No, it is good.”
“What’s the beef?”
“Just thought you would work harder for the latte is all. Hold on the search is finished.”
“What’s it say?”
“No matches to your search.”
“Crap.”
“We have to think a little bit about this.”
“How about a private plane?”
“Yeah, we can check to see if Ned has one or at least can lease one. I’m thinking about a little lower tech.”
“Lower tech? what do you mean.”
“Like around South Lake Tahoe. Maybe canvass some of the hotels.”
“So you think they went to South Lake Tahoe? You think the chief can help?”
“I’m not sure but trying to find a match in all this data is almost impossible. I think we leave the chief out of this. He has a Barney Fife vibe.”
“So do a search on the private plane front first. Then if nothing it looks like a road trip.”
“What do you mean? All we have to do is call the hotels.”
“And broadcast to everyone in South Lake Tahoe that we are trying to get information of Ned and Janice.”
“Yeah, so what?”
“I think they had help in this and we ought to keep it on the down low.”
“Man, Andrew you are sounding paranoid.”
“Oh yeah. I have lived this long for a reason. Let me mention one name to you.”
“Okay shoot.”
“Cortez.
”Okay, I get it. Let me do the search then if nothing we’ll get some flights to South Lake Tahoe.”
In Keith’s words. “Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.
Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next Monday.”
“You just took a bucket full of my sprouts, and I want to know where you are taking them.”
“What makes you think these are your sprouts?”
“Everything here is mine.”
“I’m here, and I’m not yours.”
“How do you know?”
“The farmer tells me so.”
“Jeez, a poet. Tell me Mr. Farmer’s pet. Where are you going with those sprouts?”
“Not that it’s any of your business but I have a trough full of slop, and I thought these sprouts would add an element of crunch to a fairly bland offering.”
“You can’t eat those.”
“Why not. They look delicious.”
“They are to be planted for this year’s crop harvest.”
“Oh, come on. There is a lot left. Duh.”
“I suppose once you have totally fattened the price for you will offset any loss on the number of crops.”
“Huh. What do you mean fattened?”
“You know what happens to pigs on a farm, don’t you?”
“I still don’t know what you are talking about.”
“Ever hear of spiral sliced ham?”
“No.”
“Bacon?”
“Doesn’t ring a bell.”
“Pork shoulder? Pork belly?”
“Wait the term pork rings a bell. When we came here the farmer remarked about a fine-looking group of porkers.”
“Did he mention you will end up in packages.”
“No, tell me.”
“You are food. Once you are big enough, you go to a place and come out in pieces.”
“Say it isn’t true.”
“Can’t do that.”
“Well, there is only one thing to do.”
“What’s that?”
“Here take these sprouts back. I’m going to spread the word that we all go on a hunger strike.”
“Thanks for the sprouts. Good luck on the protest.”
Today is National No Diet Day attempting to bring to light the unnecessary obsession with weight and diets. I thought it would be fun to explore what not to do today. I hope you enjoy the list and recognize the need of accepting who we are no matter our shape.
Top Ten Things Not to Do on National No Diet Day
10 On No Diet Day, do not order a monster burger with cheese, cheese fries, and a triple thick shake at a fast food joint. If you do at best, you’ll have help eating it all. At worst, your midnight wake up call will be disturbing. (That noise you keep hearing is your stomach, Hagley. It’s trying to figure a way to handle the over 3,000 calories that you decided to ingest.)
9 On No Diet Day, do not invite Tiny the WWF champ out for a bite to eat. If you do, at best he will have eaten at least twice today. At worst, he decided to diet on No Diet Day and is pleased that you informed him of the need to honor the designation. (Don’t worry about the bill, Hali. You can get a second job to cover it. I would not be asking Tiny to slow down his ordering if I was you. After all, you invited him and you don’t need a knuckle sandwich on the menu.)
8 On No Diet Day, do not invite your vegan co-workers to join you at the Happy Corral for the “all you can eat steak tummy buster buffet.” If you do, at best you’ll get polite declines. At worst, your co-workers will ask HR to sign you up for sensitivity sessions. (I guess you found out that the vegan path is one of sincerity huh Halbert? By the way, today’s class is on trust. Your classmates are supposed to catch you as you fall backward off a ten-foot ladder. You may want to call in sick.)
7 On No Diet Day, do not announce you are going on a diet. If you do, at best you will be ignored. At worst, you will be presented with the Buzz Kill of the year award. (You could have just kept quiet, Halen. Now your boss is calling attention to your lack of judgment as you are being called up to the podium to accept the award.)
6 On No Diet Day, do not keep looking at yourself in the mirror. If you do, at best you will keep finding things you don’t like. At worst, you’ll start to obsess about what you perceive as physical problem areas and start thinking of a diet. (Better you should worry about getting to work on time rather than how your body looks, Halian.
5 On No Diet Day, do not crack jokes about others appearances. If you do, at best you won’t be overheard. At worst, your boss will be standing behind you when you mention their weight gain. (Now you will have to figure out how to get back in good graces, Halstead. You might consider an on the knees apology. It may not work but will demonstrate a sincere desire to save your own butt.)
4 On No Diet Day, do not decide to try every one of the twenty ice cream flavors at the local store. If you do, at best your sense of taste will be frozen out. At worst, your enthusiasm for the day will have been misplaced. (Notwithstanding that you now can’t stand ice cream in any flavor, Ham the idea was acceptance of body shape not to expand it.)
3 On No Diet Day, do not continue to avoid getting into a swimsuit to have some fun. If you do, at best you’ll miss out as usual. At worst, you will continue to view yourself negatively. (Sure you have some bumps, Hamidi, but look around. Others do as well. I think though, one improvement might be a nice pair of trunks rather than that red speedo)
2 On No Diet Day, do not think about yourself for 24 hours. If you do, at best you missed the point. At worst, you’ll be back worrying about how you look again. ( You spend way to much time on the subject of you, Hamlet. How about spending a little time worrying about some of the other 7.7 Billion on the planet.)
1 On Diet Day, do not forget that the point is to eat healthily rather than trying to regulate your body with often dangerous diet measures. If you do, at best you could continue to lack self-satisfaction. At worst, you could jeopardize your health. (So you think you are overweight, Hampus. Why not try a more balanced approach with good food, exercise, and a fuggedaboudit attitude. At least for one day at a time.)
I participated in a local author’s event sponsored by the Bee Cave Library. The event was part of SpringFest which was a huge festival held at the Bee Cave Galleria. (Say high-end shopping center)
Here is a shot of my table before the other author arrived. There were six authors participating and we each got a half table. That plate of squid ink pasta looking stuff is a plate of bookmark charms on grosgrain ribbon.
To give you an idea of the venue, that overhang in the distance held a band which played almost non-stop and very loud. In the foreground is a place for the kids to cool off. Water bubbles up onto the bricks.
There were many food trucks.
Here is another shot of the author booth.
I said earlier that kids cooled off on the bricks. Dogs were there too.
This tent is the current Mayor of Lakeway running for re-election.
A few boat dealers and surf shops were there. (There are several lakes close by, and the Gulf is three and a half hours away. (Surfing in the lake would be disappointing for sure.)
Here is a Madness Autoworks Custom Fiat Abarth. They are a local custom shop.
It is Stream of Consciousness Saturday time again and this week’s prompt is “fall from the sky.” Yup this is it. To quote Linda Hill, “Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “fall from the sky.” Write about anything that falls from the sky–real, imagined, or idiomatic. Have fun!” Humm I have to think about this prompt for a minute. Want to rid my mind of Chicken Little who thought the whole sky was coming down. I don’t think that’s what Linda had in mind. If you would like to deal with this kind of quandary, visit Linda’s blog and read how simple it is to fall off the end of the Earth. Here is the link.
“What are you talking about? You’ve been planning a trip to Paris for years.”
“I know. It’s not the destination that bothers me.”
“The timing then?”
“No. Spring in Paris is perfect.”
“Where to stay?”
“All set. I have reservations.”
“I give up. Can’t imagine what you are doubtful about.”
“The flight.”
“Yeah, that nine-hour stint can be boring.”
“It’s not the time in the air that has me wondering.”
“Then what is it?”
“I don’t really understand what keeps a heavy 767 300 up in the air.”
“Oh. Piece of cake. It’s lift.”
“Lift?”
“Yes, the difference in air pressure rushing across the top curve of the wing from the bottom. It’s all physics.”
“I don’t get that. I just imagine the thing falling from the sky.”
“Now why would you think that?”
“Look how big and heavy those things are.”
“Here let me make an airplane out of this paper. When I throw it the forward momentum causes the air to be displaced above the wing. Since nature abhors a vacuum the lower part of the plane rises to fill in. See it flies.”
“Yeah but that is a paper airplane. It’s light.”
“What do you think would happen if I put this paper clip on the airplane?”
“I have no idea.”
“See the plane falls from the sky so to speak.”
“Making my point exactly.”
“But what if I make the wings bigger.”
“So there is more area being displaced?”
“Yup. There you have it. The plane flies”
“So it’s the wings that keep it up in the air.”
“That’s why your Boeing 767 300 has such big wings. It is all calculated as to how much wing it takes to lift that mother.”
“Lucy come quick. There’s a big dog out front.” “That is a deer Little One.” “It’s Friday can she come in and play?”
Another Friday comes upon us like the wind. It has been a good week for me. I hope it was for you. I attended a library event on Saturday, and it was part of a vast SpringFest. I will do a Views of the Neighborhood on Sunday to give you an idea of the scope.
Worked a little on my WIP. I’m not very happy how it started out. There is a critical piece of the story that has a clunker in it which needs fixing. Once fixed it will justify the motivation of the bad guys.
I have also been toying around with Amazon Marketing Service. I swear I will understand what is going on there one of these days. Well, I am determined to take it one step at a time and learn (and pay) as I go. It bugs me a lot not to be able to maximize the potential that exists there.
Today’s JohnKu talks about trying your best to maximize your potential. I hope you have a lovely weekend.
“Hey, Lucy. Is it Friday yet?” “Hurrumpf. Wednesday.” “Well. at least it’s not Monday.” “Thank heavens for small favors.”
It is Wednesday Story Day again, and last week we got a line on a brand-new suspect in the murder of Rafferty. No, it is not a lawyer. It is a banker. Although most of us would like to know who killed Sandusky, it is good to hear we may get to the bottom of the Rafferty incident. As a side note, Craig Boyack mentioned last week that this series had no title. I did ask him if he had an idea and being the talented author that he is he proffered, “Professor Rafferty and the Mysterious Heart Evaporating Whatchamacallit.” I thought his offering to be perfect with one change. Instead of Rafferty, the dead guy we would substitute Andrew the live former ME in the title. Craig agreed, and so we have, “Professor Andrew and the Mysterious Heart Evaporating Whatchamacallit.” Let’s get back to Larry’s office since he was going to check the phone records of Mrs. Rafferty and Ned Dixon to see if they had contact with each other.
“So the phone company said it would be a couple of days until we get the records.”
“That’s crap. Larry. We should have access to them online.”
“Yeah, I had to Bogart my way into the supervisor level. I pulled the obstruction of justice card.”
“Good one. Did it work?”
“Yessir. We have the online access codes, but I had to electronically sign that the scope of the investigation only covered Janice and Ned.”
“Seems fair. Nothing like pushing your nose into where it doesn’t belong.”
“If we were the Feds that wouldn’t be necessary.”
“Well we are not, and in today’s climate I’m grateful for that.”
“Do I detect some political leanings, Andrew?”
“No. Just can’t stand the baseness of the level of social dialog that is represented by Washington is all.”
“Okay. Here we are. I have Janice’s call records for the last six months. Let me do a search with Ned’s phone number to see if there are any matches.”
“That is a slick program.”
“What? I just took Janice’s cell records and exported them to Excel and am now doing a search.”
“Clever guy you are Larry.”
“Shit. Er, excuse me. There are no matches.”
“That is damn typical. Could we have an easy time with anything? Hell no.”
“Let me go the other way with Ned’s records.”
“Worth a try. What number are you using for Ned?”
“His office number.”
“Come on Larry no one in their right mind would call from the office. We need his cell number.”
“I have that right here.”
“Go back to Janice’s records and search incoming by Ned’s cell number.”
“Gotcha, Andrew. You are like a professor you know that?”
“Anything?”
“Well lookie here. Two hits.”
“Let me see. Humm the first the night before Rafferty hit the tree.”
“The second two days after. Look at this Andrew. The calls were less than thirty seconds both times.”
“Looks like not much talk. Maybe just confirming events.”
“Let’s do a run on Ned’s number and see if Janice made any more calls to him.”
“Could be interesting.”
“Well, there are no matches.”
“Just tells me that maybe they had a meeting or two and didn’t do much on the phone. We do know they made contact with each other by these calls and that is one thing. We are going to need some advanced sleuthing to determine if they met.”
“Don’t you think they will meet again?”
“I’ll bet they will wait until things cool down.”
“Just a hunch but don’t you think they would do any meeting out-of-town?”
“Good point. Gives us an opportunity to check airline reservations.”
“Man, this will be like finding a leopard in a Jason Pollock painting.”
“You amaze me, Larry. The fact you even know what a Jason Pollock is blows me away.”
