The last gurgle from the pretentious coffee maker has me near my happy place. The aroma of those Columbian beans freshly ground and tamped into submission, then doused with scalding water, makes me drool. The twin spouts give forth the elixir of life that soon will be crossing my lips. One final drip and a grab of the mug, followed by a big sip of the soothing syrup, will allow the day’s trials to be faced.
Speaking of trials. As the caffeine hits the brain, the realization that the safe problem, followed by the Yosemite Sam problem capped off by the Wile E. Coyote problem, is still unsolved. A look out the back windows verifies that the safe is still there. That means the other issues remain as well. My front security alert tone hits my phone as if to underscore the fact. Lucy and Twiggy live for that sound and are now acting out the part of Igor’s baying hounds. A quick handout saves the walls around the front door from total annihilation.
After using the speaker to determine Wile is out there, the security disengage routine is complete the front door slams open. My “What.” caused Wile to jump. “I thought we would go over the demolition plan.” Scratching my head and then giving the go-ahead, Wile proceed to detail placing some ACME explosives under the safe. This would be followed by attaching an extremely long fuse allowing us both to run down the block. Wile assured me the safe would be lifted out of the yard, and with the assistance of previously installed ACME mini rockets, he could guide it to the waiting bed of a truck.
He produced a contract that, for the most part, absolved him from any liability. With no other viable alternative, my signature hit the line marked ‘sucker.’ It didn’t say sucker, but the translation was complete in my mind as the ink dried. Wile also gave me an envelope and indicated that he needed to get to work. I told him to watch out for Yosemite Sam, and he seemed unconcerned as he headed for the backyard.
I opened the envelope, and sure enough, it was a letter from Linda Hill. There were four sentences in the letter. The first three read Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “happy place.” Write the first thing that comes to mind when you think of “happy place.” Have fun!
The fourth read I can’t believe you signed that contract.
Please visit Linda’s blog and read how if you want to join in. Here is the link https://lindaghill.com/2022/10/14/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-15-2022/
Happy Place by John W. Howell © 2022
“So your happy place is drinking a cup of coffee?”
“Yes. You don’t have to tell me yours.”
“That obvious, huh?”
“Duh.”
“Well, I could think of worse places than the pub.”
“Don’t get me wrong, I see nothing wrong with your choice.”
“Yeah. You do join me there after all.”
“Not all the time, though.”
“How do you know?”
“Well, I assume you go to the pub without me.”
“You think there is life beyond this post?”
“Um. Never thought of it before.”
“Well, think now. You and I live as long as there is a Stream of Conscious Saturday.”
“What are you saying?”
“As soon as the blog page turns, so to speak, we don’t exist.”
“That’s crazy. What about all those times we hung out?”
“Name one.”
“Last week. We had VooDoo Rangers at my place.”
“That was how the post ended. Do you remember drinking a VooDoo Ranger?”
“Now you are scaring me.”
“You’re right. Let’s drop it and go to the happy place.”
“Sometimes I don’t understand you.”
“Don’t worry. I was just trying to get John’s goat.”
“Who?”
“Never mind. Let’s get going.”
“Yes indeed. I’ll buy.”
“You are the best.”
It’s now clear that your friend doesn’t exist outside your imagination. That leaves three existential questions: Do you exist outside mine? What is reality? What does is mean? Perhaps the only thing that’s real is this headache I’ve just given myself.
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And me.
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And me.
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🤣
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Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh 💜
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😂
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😂
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Too much thinking 🤔
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You go, Willow.
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Too much thinking 🤔
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Reblogged this on NEW BLOG HERE >> https:/BOOKS.ESLARN-NET.DE.
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Thank you, Michael. 😁
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😊😄
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Yes, Lucy and Twiggy had a great surprise, and has gone like it was precepted. 😉 Thanks for the news, John! Enjoy your weekend! xx Michael
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Thank you, Michael. I hope you have a good weekend as well.
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Thanks as well, John! Here we are replaying “The Fog”. Lol Hope your weather will be better. xx Michael
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Welcome to today’s existential crisis. I’m sure they exist other days of the week. They’re just hibernating or trying to sober up for the next Saturday.
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Ha ha ha. Love this comment, Charles. 😁
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You can always sidestep by buying the next round, right, John? 🍺🍷🤪
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I think so, GP. I’ll give it a try. 😂
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We have a regional food store chain here named Acme. For years, when people want to make a joke about buying something at Acme based on where Wile E. shops, we naturally think they’re actually talking about the Acme grocery store instead. Except for explosives and mini-rockets, of course. The Acme grocery store chain doesn’t sell explosives and mini-rockets…yet.🙂
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I’m very familiar with Acme food stores, Bruce. I can imagine how folks would react to Wile’s stuff. 😁
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Oh my, you’ve captured a writer’s life. Brilliant. 😄 Have a wonderful weekend, John.
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Thank you, Gwen. Have a terrific weekend yourself.
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The best happy places exist in our minds. Who’s this John fellow?
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I don’t know him either.
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I always assumed my characters hung out at the union hall, waiting for another story to come along.
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I think that is a good way to imagine them passing the time.
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This was great, John! Happy Saturday!
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Happy Saturday to you, Jill *sung to the tune of He’ll Have to Go by Jim Reeves
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Getting your mail is becoming a dangerous undertaking, John. Coffee is my happy place too. Nothing like that first sip. 🙂
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I agree, Diana. 😁
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Such a fun read as usual. Bravo!
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Me thinks that you saw a puddytat off in the distance and that diverted your mind from understanding the sucker contract. Either that or not enough happy coffee. Best you go off to the bar so you don’t witness the tragedy about to unfold in your yard. I hope the neighbors have home insurance…
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🤣👍
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😊
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Yeah I’m beginning to think having Wile do the job might not have been the best decision. I’m going to move to bourbon pretty quick.
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Thank you so much for letting me know you liked it, Susan.
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I love how your mind works. Thanks for the great post. I too think they hibernate awaiting the next Saturday. 🙂
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I’m almost sure they do sleep a lot. Thanks, Lauren. 😁
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Being outside is my happy place, but that first cuppa tea in the morning comes in a close second.
I don’t think John should be standing anywhere near Wile E when that safe comes down…just sayin. 😂
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I think you are right about the falling safe. Wile tells me there is nothing to fear. I think he is a chronic optimist. Thanks, Deborah.
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😀
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These always bring a smile to my face, John 🙂 ,and cause the gears to turn in my brain. Thanks!
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I’m glad you like them, Tim 😁
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For some reason, my comment didn’t land in the right place. Perhaps I need to come to the bar with you two.
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I think that would be a good idea. I did like the comment and it gave me a laugh. I think Susan liked it too. 😂
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Now that was a strange dark Steven King way to contrast the happy place. Quick bring out more Voodoo Ranger so we can forget.
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Try to forget if you can. MoooHahahaha
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Sounds like the perfect time to get the heck out of the house for any reason. Good luck with blowing the safe out of the backyard. 🙂 Here’s to happy places!
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Thank you, Jan.
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That will be an interesting experiment to see where the safe goes 🙂 Good choice of a happy place!
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It is supposed to land in the back of the truck. Knock wood.
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Fingers crossed!
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That too.
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Another great installment John…. Is the safe gone?
Is the coffee machine still working…are the girls still barking?
How about I buy you and your friend a drink and maybe all the questions in this thread could be answered ?? 💜💜💜
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The safe is still there. The machine is working. The girls have their treats and are quiet.. Wile E. Coyote is contracted to get rid of the safe. We’ll see how it goes. Thanks, Willow.
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🤞🤞🤞🕷️🕷️🙏🙏
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😊
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I agree with Linda, I can’t believe you signed the contract! Always, always get your lawyer to look over documents that could blow up your neighborhood- just sayin’
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Yeah, would have been a good idea. Thanks, Jacquie
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You do keep my little gray cells a cogitating!
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Gotta keep ’em working
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You’ve outdone yourself with this one, John. If I’m not mistaken, my brain just broke.
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Take some soothing syrup, Liz. It’ll fix it good as new.
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Ah, yes, the soothing syrup. 🙂
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Uh huh.
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Another great SOCS, John. I adore the intros you write for these. Hugs on the wing.
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Thank you, Teagan. So nice to hear. 😁
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I’ve noticed a distinct pattern here, John. There’s always a bit of mystery and confusion between characters, they sometimes work it out, and then they end up at the pub. 😊
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No better place to get things settled than the pub. Thanks, Pete.
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It’s all about cherishing that time, and the Voodoo they do makes it all the better.
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Yes indeed. Thanks, Marc.
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Loved it, Boss.
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😊
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Uh Huh!
“Don’t worry. I was just trying to get John’s goat.” ……. So, who’s with your BF?
I think it’s Wile E. masquerading as John. Your BF has probably already had a few Voodoo Rangers, and can’t tell the difference.
– Your Vinyl Primal Lover
🐂💋💥
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I think you are right about those VooDoo Rangers. He gets lost that way sometimes. 🐂💋
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🐂💋🐂💋
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These emojis are so much easier than a detailed conversation aren’t they? 🐂💋🐂💋
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Hahaha!Yes, provided we know what we are talking about.
Several years ago, when I acknowledged their existence, I sent a text to my hip 20 something niece. Oh, I sent a unicorn, a happy face… a bunch of the emoji.
She texted back: That makes no sense at all! What are you talking about? 🐂💋🐂💋
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Ha ha ha. Yes you have to speak emoji. I don’t. I’m comfortable with the 🐂💋🐂💋though.
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This was terrific, John. I loved the last sentence in Linda’s letter, “I can’t believe you signed that contract.” I’m saying a prayer for you. 😅
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Ha ha ha. Thanks, Jennie
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You’re welcome!
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😊
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“Lucy and Twiggy live for that sound and are now acting out the part of Igor’s baying hounds.” The girls would never be that uncivilized, John, even in the presence of Sam and Wile.
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Twiggy can bark the paint off a vehicle. Lucy follows along.
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😂😂😂
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🤣
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I guess there are worse things than living only within the “pages”… It sure keeps us entertained.
And I am not feeling particularly positive about that safe situation…
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I’m not too positive either.
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💣💥
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Fingers in ears for sure.
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😀
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😁
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