Photo by Matthew Essman on Unsplash
10 If you are in the wedding party, do not take off your clothes, no matter what the circumstances may dictate or what you think the circumstances are dictating.
9 If you are not in the wedding party, see number 10.
8 If you are the best man or maid of honor, do not cry when you describe your love for the bride or groom in your toast, and eliminate the word “amazing” from your speech.
7 Do not try to set an all-time personal record in the number and kinds of drinks you intake simply because they are free.
6 If you do set an all-time personal record of kind and number of drinks, do not ask the bride or groom for a kiss or worse, for a date. (Same goes for the best man and maid of honor.)
5 If you are not in the wedding party, do not offer a toast even if several of your friends are clapping and saying your name, followed by the chant “toast, toast, toast.”
4 If you brought a wedding gift to the reception, do not take it home, no matter what.
3 Do not pretend to be someone else or use a made-up name when you are introduced to others, even if you may never see these people again, and you think it is so funny.
2 If you came with a date to the wedding, do not go home with someone else.
1. When you leave the reception, do not thank the bride and groom’s parents with a big juicy kiss
Fiction Favorites 
I have been to quite a few weddings, and I have see some behaviour that would make even you cringe, John…
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I think we all have. Thanks, Jaye.
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Haha, this list is gold 😂 #5 had me laughing out loud. Thanks for digging this up.
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I’m glad you got a laugh, Ritish. Sometimes laughs are precious gifts. 😊
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This are ALL valid suggestions, in fact they should be mandatory!
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Nail the list to the church door sounds about right. Thanks, GP. 😀
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😀👍
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😀
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10 and 9 brings up many questions and now of them are sanitary.
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I was a witness to a bunch of wedding guests stripping and jumping into the hotel pool. Had no idea what started an idiot idea like that.
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Yikes.
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I know right?
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Easy to read and understand. Not so easy to execute.
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That is the problem with all rules, it seems.
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I’m going to print this list and give it out to all guests at Son #1’s reception in September!
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I would just leave a pile of them at the entrance. More offical that way.
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#4–😂 **They won’t miss this.** This list is perfect. Now if some people would only read it…
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Ha ha ha. Yes, that would be great.
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Bwahahahaha! No. 9 especially cracked me up. Too funny.
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Thank you, Monika. Always like to hear that you got a laugh.
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Your Top Ten lists always make me smile.
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😊
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This is a great list to follow, for sure! Thanks for the laughs this morning.
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Always lovely to hear you got some. Thanks, Kymber.
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Having just attended a wedding on Saturday in Austin, I could agree with this list. 🙂 And by, the way, I saw the sign for Lakeway on our way out of town!
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So you know it is a real place. 😀
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Yes, it’s real!
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😀
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Great advice list, John! Yes, indeed, do not be an Alpha Hotel!
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Thanks, Tim. I was going to ask what an Alpha Hotel was, but it came to me. Yes good advice. 😀
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Yeah, I revert to the military alphabet phonetics often, John. 😎 Many times I’ve said “Bravo Sierra” at some government movement.
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I can identify with that. There are some real Sierra, Oscar, Bravo’s in the government.
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😊
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I love #8, particularly “eliminate the word “amazing” from your speech.” Perhaps “awesome” could be added, just to bring the advice up to date.
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Awesome is a good one.
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These had my imagination going, John. Could be a rom com movie script called Kiss the Bride (Not You!)
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Ha ha ha.Good one, Rebecca.
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Boy these are great tips. A lot of people need to read this list.
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Or just make more fodder for more lists.
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12 years old, but still valid, John.
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Seems just like yesterday
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#2—ouch! I don’t know if that’s more funny or sad.
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I’ll go for funny. Thanks, Pete.
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I can add one more #11. If you are the best man don’t forget your suit. The best man wearing shorts and a t-shirt just isn’t classy enough. Our younger son was the best man for our oldest son and he did just that. They rushed to go and rent him a suit right before the wedding.
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That is funny. Kids are like that for sure.
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Well suit, I meant tuxedo
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I assumed such.
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Every wedding guest should have this list. Along with;
If you are an older wedding guest, do not decide to show off your moves on the dance floor.
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There you go. Nothing like an old guy doing the Macarena to send folks to the exits.
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Wise words, John. My hairdresser told me that when her daughter got married, the reception ended up in one big fist fight!
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Ha ha ha. Was it in Liverpool?
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No, in Suffolk.
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Lotta drinks I’ll bet.
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Probably, although I think one side hated the other side.
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Yeah, that is a good reason.
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Simple, basic, universal. Just like lists should be. Takes out the ‘different culture’ excuse. I mean, read no. 10, or 4. Or 7, or 2…
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Yes. We are all human after all.
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Though sometimes I question that contention, I think I know what you mean.
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I’ll take it down a notch. We are all mammals after all. 😀
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I disagree strongly with #7.
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I can see your point. How about, “Don’t try to resist drinking everything in sight, cause it’s free.”
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I haven’t been to a wedding where someone tried to take their clothes off. Gee, I’ve missed all the fun.😅
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I think maybe you left the receptions before the skinny dipping began.
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Darn!
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I know. 😀
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