Top Ten Things Not To Do When Shopping at the Last Minute for the Holidays

~ John W. Howell
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

This post was initially published by Marie Ann Bailey and me on December 23, 2013. I thought it might be a good idea to publish it a little early to perhaps avoid last-minute shopping.

Top Ten Things Not To Do When Shopping at the Last Minute for the Holidays

10.  When shopping at the last-minute for the holidays, do not battle another for a parking place. If they are similarly crazed, you may just lose the front end of your car. At the same time, the other driver yells “Wakanda Forever” at you as if they are Angela Bassett in Black Panther.

9.  When shopping at the last-minute for the holidays, do not take your children with you. At best, they will get in the way. At worst, they will be a witness to your stepped-up aggressive behavior when you Taser another parent for the last remaining Lego City Police Boat Chase set.

8.  When shopping at the last-minute for the holidays, do not leave home without a list. If you do, at best, you will no doubt forget something or someone. At worst, you will be tempted to grab armloads of stuff with the rationale that what doesn’t work can be returned, only to find out after the holidays that you were wrong.

7.  When shopping at the last-minute for the holidays, do not think you are going to get anything on sale. If you think you will, at best, you will be disappointed. At worst, you will be afraid to go home, given what you have spent.

6.  When shopping at the last minute for the holidays, do not forget the sizes on your list. If you do, at best, you may just misjudge. At worst, you will get your mother-in-law an extra-large, and you’ll never hear the end of it (even if it is the right size).

5.  When shopping at the last-minute for the holidays, do not think expensive will take the place of thoughtful. If you do, at best, you will spend too much and become everyone’s favorite gift-giver.  At worst, none of your gifts will be appreciated, and all of them will be returned for cash.

4.  When shopping at the last-minute for the holidays, do not have everything gift wrapped at the store. If you do, at best, it will appear as if you did not put your heart into the gifts. At worst, you could be accused of giving gifts you bought for someone else.

3.  When shopping at the last-minute for the holidays do not buy gifts that you yourself would not want to receive. If you do, at best, you might just get it back someday. At worst, the gift might be as tasteless as you thought it was, and now you are the embarrassed recipient.

2.  When shopping at the last-minute for the holidays, do not stop until your list is complete. If you do, at best, the person you left off will give you the best gift ever, and you’ll have to admit that you got them nothing. At worst, your excuse of running out of time will be the straw that broke the camel’s back, since you had a year to make it right.

1.  When shopping at the last-minute for the holidays, do not stop humming your favorite carol. If you do, you might break out in tears, and nobody likes a crier this time of year.

 

80 thoughts on “Top Ten Things Not To Do When Shopping at the Last Minute for the Holidays”

  1. My goodness, with so much wisdom tucked into your list, I suspect you’ve learned the hard way. 😄 From parking to sales, you evoked plenty of chuckles. Have a great day, John.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. It’s #8 for me. If I don’t have a list, I lose track of everything – what I’ve bought, what I still need to get, etc. And then there’s keeping track of shipments to stay ahead of the porch pirates.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. My dad loved shopping on Christmas Eve. He’d have other presents before that day, but he loved to prowl around looking for bargains. Honestly, I think he found the edge of desperation in the air exciting.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. It is indeed the time of year now when “let go my Eggo” becomes “let go my Lego.” Battles in the aisles are common. I agree a complete list of items to get is a must. And, if I ever had someone else wrap my gifts, my gift receivers would automatically know I didn’t take the time and effort to do it myself…because they already know I am the worst gift wrapper of all time. I often adhere myself to the gifts during the process…

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I’d say don’t shop at the last minute… But, there’s always someone that shows up or office plans change.

    Ahhh but it’s the shopping thst makes it delightful. Thanks for sharing

    Liked by 1 person

  18. All good ones.. I have a new one.. do not let your 90 year old mother take her ex 91 shopping at Costco because they will have to enlist you to bring all the crap no one needs home that weights a ton!!! 🥹

    Liked by 1 person

  21. The first one #10 reminded me of when Evelyn Couch (played by Kathy Bates) shouted “Towanda!” and rammed her car into another after they stole her parking spot in Fried Green Tomatoes. That was funny.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Great list, John! Finding a parking place is gold, bringing a list is necessary (for me, at least), and buying things that we wouldn’t want for ourselves made me laugh, such good advice. Hope you’re having a good holiday season so far. 🎄

    Liked by 1 person

  24. “Nobody likes a crier this time of year” — truer words were never spoken. Plus everyone’s nerves are already shot, I doubt people would know what to do with someone leaking water from their eyes. 😂

    Liked by 1 person

Comments are closed.