The neat part of having a coffee robot is the availability of that soothing syrup, available night or day, 24/7. Having to wait for an extended brewing process for more than one minute might mean the difference between calmed neurons or a catastrophic brain bleed. The first sip stops the auto production line cacaphony of the caffeine addition screaming for relief. The second sip brings the dreaded doorbell Westminster chime and Cerberus duet, which threatens to break glass or cause eardrums to bleed. Two fresh Benny bones are tossed into the soundproof room, followed by the door slam, bringing golden silence to the room.
A check of the security monitor shows Smoky the Bear standing on the porch. He has an envelope and, of course, a clipboard. Rather than argue about leaving the delivery with a sign, the security shutdown process begins.
The SWAT team needs to be put on standby. A quick text to the leader confirms that status. Also, the flight of A-10 Warthogs must be diverted. Another call to the commander puts that worry to rest. The SEAL team needs to be called off, and a call to the leader makes that possible. The MH-60 Jayhawk Helicopter hovering over the house is diverted. A call to the tow truck driver stops the deployment of an M1A1 Abrams Tank. The control panel simplifies the security system’s shutdown process. The boiling oil vats are put on standby, the turret mortars disengaged, the Trebuchet on safety, the concertina wire rolled, the Claymore mines reset, the tower Gatling guns on safety, the moat net dropped, the alligators fed, and the IEDs and shoulder-held rockets put away. The Proton torpedoes switched off. The gamma ray beams covered. The high-powered maser guns switched to standby, and the nanorobots were chained in the basement. The Klingons are called back, and the Targ is caged. Robbie’s Bot is sent to the basement. The Tasmanian Devil is directed to the food in his cage, and the door drops. The electronic jammer is kept active, given a situation with a robot not too long ago. The locks on the door are thrown. And the door opened.
The bear hands me the envelope and the clipboard. After signing and returning it, it’s obvious the bear is looking for a tip. “If what you have done yesterday still looks big to you, you haven’t done much today.” Mikhail Gorbachev said that, and that’s my tip as I slam the door.
The message in the envelope is from Linda Hill. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “neat.” Use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!
To see what others have done with the prompt, visit Linda’s post. Here is the link. https://lindaghill.com/2026/05/01/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-may-2-2026/
Neat by John W. Howell ©2024
“Pretty neat the way you got rid of the bear.”
“I don’t think it was really Smoky.”
“What makes you think that?”
“He was wearing Nike running shoes.”
“Yeah, that would be a tip-off for sure.”
“Why do you suppose you get all these weird characters delivering your messages?”
“For one, folks like to see who will be doing it.”
“Okay.”
“For another, it makes an interesting counterbalance to the security shutdown process.”
“Why? What’s wrong with the shutdown process?”
“Might be a little stale.”
“So think of something else.”
“Easy to say.”
“What about the Voo Doo Ranger bit?”
“The car part is still fresh. Plus, I have a whole file of cars sent in by Dan Antion, Tom Okragly, and Resa McConaghy.”
“Does remind me.”
“Did you call Uber?”
“Right over there.”
Photo by Resa McConaghy
“Well, that is something. Lots of room for sure. What’s the catch?”
“Nothing much. We have to pick up the boys and girls gymnastics team on the way to the pub.”
“How do we get home?”
“Oh, the driver will deliver the team and come back for us.”
“Okay, that doesn’t sound too bad. I still feel there’s more.”
“Full disclosure. It’s the 7th-grade team, and they will have had enough Gatorade to float Florida.”
“I’ll get my earplugs.”
Fiction Favorites 
I’ve been on a bus full of 7th graders, John. They called it being a chaperone but I can think of a lot of worse sounding names that would apply. Have an extra VooDoo. By the way, I think I saw Smoky in one of your bushes on his way back to his car.
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I wonder what he is doing in the bushes. Is that smoke? Thanks, Dan.😀
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😊
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😊
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That bus makes me think of ‘Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem’ from the Muppets. Pretty they had a similar bus.
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I only saw Dr. Teeth once or twice, so I’m no help.
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I was going to make a comment about you flipping out with all those 7th graders, but that is way too obvious. Stay groovy, John. 🤸♂️✌️
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Ha ha ha. Thanks, Lois.
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Good advice tip to the Smoky the Bear costume guy, John. Riding in the bus with the boys and girls gymnastics team on the way to the pub should be interesting.
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Calculated to drive me nuts. Thanks, Tim.
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😊
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You manage to keep it fresh, John.
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Thank you, Pat. 😊
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😁
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You sure it wasn’t Yogi Bear? I can see him wearing Nikes. I taught two dance classes (yes, dance, and I am beyond dancing) when I subbed last week 2nd and 4th grade. They have decibel levels that beat out seventh graders easily.
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I can believe it. I hope you had some earplugs.
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I love the shut down process. But I’ll rack my mind to dream up an alternative. This will take a while as my mind is slow to react to my requests sometimes.
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I have the same problem sometimes. Thanks, Tom
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Haha! Float Florida… 😀 But my favorite — and you have a true gift, John, to have come up with “the auto production line cacaphony of the caffeine addition screaming for relief.” Brilliant. I got a kick out of the bus too. Big hugs.
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Aw. Thank you so much, Teagan. Hugs to you.
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Finally, l have reestablished contact with the “High Exalted Mystic Ruler”…and once again, l pledge thee my troth, and anything else you consider worth betrothing🐳
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So nice to see The Tuna 🐳 back on the job. 😀
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Oh my goodness. I have been in a car with a small group of seventh graders and I needed ear plugs. 🤪 Great use of the prompt!
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Thank you, Jan. Hit ’em with some Gatorade, and you have a symphony. 😀
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