Top Ten Things Not to Do at the Opening of the Wizard of Oz in 1938.

Image by Thomasschoene from Pixabay

 

This week marks the anniversary of the opening of the movie The Wizard of Oz in New York City in 1938. Since we all want to attend that gala event, we need to take our Top Ten Things Not to Do list so we can enjoy the evening without causing an incident or a tear in the time continuum. All set? Let’s go. This post ran first on August 19, 2019.

Top Ten Things Not to Do at the Opening of The Wizard of Oz in 1938.

10 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not think anyone will appreciate your cosplay attempt with the lion costume. If you do, at best, no one will take your photo. At worst, since cosplay is a thing of recent history, the zoo will be called, and you’ll be netted. (This is a fine kettle of fish you’ve gotten yourself into, Iapetus. At least there’s plenty of red meat served. I would keep an eye on that big fella over there. I think he likes you.)

9 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not let Tiny the WWF champ see you cut in line. If you do, at best, you can quickly make friends with the person you cut in front of. At worst, Tiny, who was just warned about the evils of line cutting by his boss, has decided to make an example of you. (Stop screaming, Idris. Tiny will eventually stop twirling and slam you to the pavement. Then it will be time to scream.)

8 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not make any comment about the Munchkins. If you do, at best, they’ll be too busy to hear you. At worst, your comment regarding size challenge will not go unrevenged. (How does it feel being carried aloft by one hundred hands, Ignat? I hope you enjoy the ride cause the next stop is the Hudson River.)

7 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not sing along with Dorothy on the song Over the Rainbow. If you do, at best, the music will be loud enough to drown you out. At worst, the theater management will finally find you. (They thought you had brought your cat to the performance, Iliya. Looks like you better say a quick goodbye to your seatmates.)

6 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not think it amusing to arrive on a pink horse. If you do, at best, traffic will be so bad you’ll never get to the front door. At worst, you’ll come face to face with the militant leader of the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. (The leader makes the Wicked Witch of the West appear to be a Girl Scout, Imad. That umbrella feels like a billy club, doesn’t it? Best to ride out of town.)

5 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not ask the concession person for a copy of the DVD. If you do, at best you’ll get a box of Raisinets instead. At worst, the concession person thinking you mean to hold up the stand will whistle for the police. (Now you have the pleasure of explaining what a DVD is, Imanol. Maybe it’s better to say you meant Raisinets after all.)

4 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not ask to try on the ruby slippers. If you do, at best Judy Garland will say no. At worst, you’ll get them on. (Now what are you going to do, Indra? You have size fives on your nines and no way to get them off. You’re lucky there is not a real witch, Glenda. She would send you back to Kansas.)

3 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not ask the Winged Monkey King for an autograph. If you do, at best he won’t have a pen. At worst he might decide to take you back to the tower to share a lunch. (Don’t look now, Iolo, but the term “share” has a different meaning to the Flying Monkeys)

2 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not ask Auntie Em for a cookie. If you do, at best she won’t hear you. At worst, you will be the one-millionth person to make that request. (So Auntie decided to give you something for your effort, huh, Ionakana? Here, take this steak and put it on that eye. The swelling will go down in no time.)

1 At the opening of The Wizard of Oz, do not shout out, “Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.” If you do, at best no one will know what you are talking about. At worst, when that part comes in the movie, the audience realizes you shouted a spoiler. (Time to leave your seat, Iowereth. There are about 300 moviegoers who want a piece of you. Guess what? There aren’t that many pieces to go around.)

57 comments

  1. Esther Chilton's avatar

    The Wizard of Oz is one of my favourite films. How wonderful would it have been to be there at the premiere? I would certainly take your advice had I been – though it would be tempting to arrive on a pink horse…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      I think the pink horse arrival would be great, but the challenge is finding one. Thanks, Esther.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Ankur Mithal's avatar

        Would the horse qualify for valet parking?

        Liked by 1 person

        1. John W. Howell's avatar

          Absolutely. Good idea, too.

          Liked by 1 person

  2. Charles Yallowitz's avatar

    This is why silence is golden and safe at times.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. T. W. Dittmer's avatar

    This is good advice for the opening of the movie The Wizard of Oz, John. It’s best to just watch and enjoy the movie.

    Like

  4. lois's avatar

    Do we get to follow the yellow brick road into the theater? They do have a yellow brick road, right??!! 😦😬

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      Good question. I’ll have to do more research. Thanks, Lois

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Liz Gauffreau's avatar

    I got a good laugh out of #7.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      That makes me happy. Thanks for letting me know. 😄

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Liz Gauffreau's avatar

        You’re welcome, John.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. equipsblog's avatar

    Somehow I guessed there might be as a Tiny reference somewhere. Good list.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      He is in every Top Ten beginning in the 90s

      Liked by 1 person

  7. bruce@ssa's avatar

    The flying monkeys terrified me as a kid. Hard to believe this movie is that old, John. Can’t imagine how amazing it was for audiences who saw it when it first came out. Good advice all, especially the one about not yelling out spoilers. Those individuals should be carried away…by the flying monkeys.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      Ha ha ha. Thanks, Bruce.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. D.L. Finn, Author's avatar
    D.L. Finn, Author · · Reply

    Love this and would have loved to have been there.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      Me, too, Denise.

      Like

  9. noelleg44's avatar

    All great advice! And funny. The winged monkey scared my kids and the new winged monkeys in Wicked and Wicked for Good scared the whey out of me!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      Ha ha ha. “Scared the whey out of me.” Great line, Noelle.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Kymber's avatar

    This one made me smile, John. The Wizard of Oz has always been my all‑time favorite, so I enjoyed this.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      I have always liked the movie, too. Thanks, Kymber.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. robertawrites235681907's avatar

    1938? Really! That long ago. This is the one with Judy Garland, isn’t it? A fantastic movie.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      That is the movie, and it was that long ago.

      Like

      1. robertawrites235681907's avatar

        Yes, longer than I realised. Wow!

        Liked by 1 person

  12. coldhandboyack's avatar

    Not a bad night. You got a steak and some Raisinettes out of the deal. Keep those Raisinettes out of reach of the pink horse on your ride home.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      Good idea. 😄

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Author Jan Sikes's avatar

    Ha! Ha! It’s interesting actually, to look back and see how far we’ve come. They wouldn’t have conceived of DVDs in 1938.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      No, not at all.😊 I remember I got on a Korean Air flight and they gave me a CD in 1990. I didn’t know what to do with it.

      Liked by 1 person

  14. petespringer's avatar

    This post brought back a lot of memories from when our staff dressed up as characters from the Wizard of Oz for Halloween. I was the cowardly lion. The best costume was made by one of my fellow teachers who dressed as Dorothy. Part of her costume included a house that had fallen on her. (the one Dorothy experiences during the tornado).

    Like

  15. Sorryless's avatar

    NEVER mess with people in line and especially not if Tiny is in charge. As for the flying monkeys . . ain’t NO way I’m going near those guys. They still scare the hell out of me. And speaking of Wizard of Oz, there’s a cool video on YouTube about lost footage. There was an eight minute song about the Jitterbug that was completely cut.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      I saw that one. It’s where te trees are dancing, right? (well, swaying)

      Liked by 1 person

  16. Dan Antion's avatar

    Another great list, John. I’ll just wait for the DVD (I know, about 60 years).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      Smart move. 😄

      Liked by 1 person

  17. thomasstigwikman's avatar

    I agree with #7 “do not sing along with Dorothy on the song Over the Rainbow” at least if I am the one attempting to sing along. But how about if it is Israel Kamakawiwoʻole?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      His version is beautiful for sure. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  18. Tails Around the Ranch's avatar

    It’s amazing this iconic classic has been around for so long charming young and old viewers alike. It’s broadcast frequently and I watch it every time I come across it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      I always enjoy it myself. I think about the audience’s reaction when the film shifts from black-and-white to color. Must have been an “Ooooooh” moment.

      Liked by 1 person

  19. Jennie's avatar

    Really funny, John!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Jacqui Murray's avatar

    It’s hard to believe that excellent movie is almost 100 years old.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      I know,right. Ahead of its time

      Liked by 1 person

  21. Rebecca Cuningham's avatar

    12 years until the 100th anniversary. I remember when it was on TV once per year, the only time TV was allowed during dinner.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      I remember that, too. Thanks, Rebecca.😊

      Liked by 1 person

  22. Andrew Joyce's avatar

    Here’s a good one:

    Victor Fleming who directed the Wizard of Oz (90% of it) also directed Gone with the Wind (100%) in the same year.

    What a slacker!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      Interesting information, Andrew. Good to have you back.

      Like

  23. Andrew Joyce's avatar

    What do you mean “1938?” It was released in 1939. Do you know something that I don’t?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      You are so right. I don’t know where the 1938 came from. I guess a typo. Thanks for keeping me honest

      Like

      1. Andrew Joyce's avatar

        Someone has to keep you honest. I guess the task falls on my broad shoulders. You’re welcome.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. John W. Howell's avatar

          Yes, thank you very much. I owe you one.

          Like

    2. John W. Howell's avatar

      Also I checked with WordPress on your report of no e-mails announcing my posts for a while, and here was their answer.
      Your newsletter sends are going out successfully — the issue is almost certainly on Andrew’s end rather than yours. A few likely culprits:

      Suppressed/unsubscribed: With 3,005 suppressed subscribers on your list, it’s possible his address was suppressed (e.g. after a bounce or an accidental unsubscribe). If that happened, he’d need to re-subscribe at your site.
      Spam folder: WordPress.com notification emails frequently land in spam or promotions tabs — worth asking him to check there and mark as “not spam.”
      Blocked by recipient: Each recent send shows 1–2 addresses blocked at the recipient’s mail server, which silently drops delivery.

      The simplest fix is to have him visit Fiction Favorites and re-subscribe, which should reset his status

      Like

  24. Andrew Joyce's avatar

    It’s always my fault! Thanks for ratting me out, Word Press.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John W. Howell's avatar

      They did make it pretty clear, didn’t they? Glad it’s back anyway.

      Like

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