“Using this photo (below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put your offering (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before Sunday evening UK time. If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please also mention it in a comment here.
Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next time.”
This list appeared on November 23, 2015. Since parents are still having kids, I think it might be useful
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This list was inspired by watching new parents having some challenges with raising their kids. Unfortunately, sometimes the stress was self-induced, and some good counseling could have avoided the scene.
Top Ten Things Not to do If you are a New First-Time Parent
10 If you are a new first-time parent, do not think your child needs to be the first in your circle to do everything. If you do, at best, you will be headed for some disappointment. At worst, you will spend needless cash on child and adult psychologists seeking explanations for unnecessary problems. (Have you ever met an adult who wasn’t potty trained?)
9 If you are a new first-time parent, do not dress your child as an adult. If you do, at best, your friends will think you missed something in your childhood. At worst, your child will notice they are a little out of place with the other kids leading to other self-image issues. (The first hint is when your five-year-old asks for a Porsche for Christmas)
8 If you are a new first-time parent, do not take your toddler to an elegant restaurant for a late-night dinner. If you do, at best, your child will be miserable being up too late in an unfamiliar environment. At worst, the rest of the restaurant patrons will draw straws to see who calls Child Protective Services. (You are used to the crying, right?)
7 If you are a new first-time parent, do not stress over preschool choices. If you do, at best, you will need medication to get through the process. At worst, you will become so obsessed with the so-called right school that you will never be satisfied if you are not successful in enrolling your child. (Isn’t preschool supposed to be enjoyable?)
6 If you are a new first-time parent, do not worry about the nursery’s color. If you do, at best, your child will not notice the color for a few months. At worst, your worry will be another stress point that a newborn will recognize. (So you have a boy in pink and a girl in blue. Only your in-laws will care.)
5 If you are a new first-time parent, do not buy quantities of clothes and accessories thinking you are saving money. If you do, at best, your child will outgrow the stuff in a month or two, and you will be able to return the excess. At worst, you lose your receipt and find yourself cutting off the feet of onesies so you won’t have to throw them away. (That Costco run really didn’t pay, did it?)
4 If you are a new first-time parent, do not read a bunch of childcare books. If you do, at best, you will be totally confused about what to do. At worst, you will have contradictory opinions, and you will need to toss a coin to decide. (Trust a coin on a fever cause and treatment? I don’t think so)
3 If you are a new first-time parent, do not believe you have to record every minute of the child’s life. If you do, at best, you will watch your child grow up through the camera viewfinder. At worst, your child will think life is only real if it is captured on film. (Maybe put the camera down and pick up the kid.)
2 If you are a new first-time parent, do not buy toys that are not age-appropriate. If you do, at best, your child will not play with them. At worst, you’ll enjoy playing with the toys and be accused of purchasing the toys on purpose. (Tsk, tsk, tsk)
1 If you are a new first-time parent, do not think you will have to survive on little sleep for the rest of your life. If you do, at best, you will think you need to run away. At worst, you will want to take the child to the pediatric return desk only to find it doesn’t exist. (Don’t worry, the lack of sleep thing only lasts a couple of years – uh, maybe eighteen)
Today we are going to the first annual cornhole tournament in Lakeway. It is a double elimination open to teams of two. We are being catered by Craig Os Pizza. Our entertainment is
Menu
SPECIALTY PIZZAS
House Special
Pizza sauce, mozzarella, pepperoni, Italian sausage, mushrooms, caramelized onions, roasted green peppers
Margarita
Olive Oil, Mozzarella, Fresh Basil, Roma Tomatoes
White Italian
Alfredo Sauce, Mozzarella, Fresh Red Onion, Sicilian Chicken, and Fresh Cilantro Tip: Get it with smoked bacon!
Traditional Veggie
Pizza sauce, mozzarella, caramelized onions, roasted green peppers, mushrooms, black olives, Roma tomatoes
Mediterranean Shipping Company (MSC) has taken a major step to help protect blue whales and other cetaceans living and feeding in the waters off the coast of Sri Lanka by altering shipping lanes to avoid their habitat.
A global leader in container shipping and logistics, MSC began in mid-2022 to voluntarily reroute its vessels passing by Sri Lanka on a new course that is approximately 15 nautical miles to the south, in line with the advice of scientists and other key actors in the maritime sector.
The decision was based on research surveys completed by the International Fund for Animal Welfare (IFAW), with the World Trade Institute (WTI), Biosphere Foundation, University of Ruhuna (Sri Lanka), and supported by the World Wildlife Fund (WWF).
Westbound ship traffic is now limited to a latitude between 05 30N and 05 35N, and eastbound traffic is limited to a latitude between 05 24N and 05 29N in order to avoid designated cetacean habitats.
– Released.
Sri Lanka lies in the Indian Ocean, between Asia and Europe, and the port of Colombo is a major transshipment hub for global trade.
The area off its southern coast is one of the busiest shipping lanes in the world and is also inhabited by large populations of whales, meaning that these animals may be at risk of colliding with ships.
Simulations have shown that moving the official shipping lane 15 nautical miles to the south could reduce the strike risk to blue whales by a whopping 95%. However, despite years of advocacy by scientists, the shipping industry, and NGOs, the boundaries of the official shipping line have not been reassigned to reduce the risk of ship strikes on cetaceans.
MSC is now taking measures to protect marine wildlife seriously, from adapting shipping service networks to keep away from designated whale breeding and feeding grounds to reducing vessel speed and rerouting ships to avoid reported marine wildlife populations.
“We believe that the commercial shipping sector has an important role to play in protecting cetaceans, specifically in helping to reduce the risk of ship collisions with whales,” said Stefania Lallai, Vice President – Sustainability at MSC.
“MSC is proud to rank at or near the top of whale safety shipping rankings. However, we are not at all complacent. We believe that raising awareness of these issues and encouraging collaboration between industry, scientific bodies, civil society, and governments is essential as we strive collectively to do more to minimize the risk of ship strikes.”
In Sri Lanka specifically, the liner shipping industry led by the World Shipping Council, of which MSC is a member, has advocated creating a new official marine traffic scheme that is fully separated from the blue whale feeding area.
It is hoped that this will soon become a reality, so all large-scale commercial marine traffic moves to the more southerly zone that MSC ships are now guided to follow. In the meantime, MSC urges all other ship operators to consider choosing a more southerly route past Sri Lanka to significantly reduce the possibility of whale strikes.
The good news here is that big business is beginning to take some stewardship of the planet. Today’s JohnKu talks about sharing the planet. I hope you have a terrific weekend.
In Keith’s words. “Using this photo(below) as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put your offering (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before Sunday evening UK time. If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please also mention it in a comment here.
Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next time.”
This post was originally published on September 14, 2015. I think we can squeeze in a bit of learning from it still. I hope you enjoy it.
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This list is inspired by watching some of the funny things people buy solely because they are being offered at a discounted price. Of course, I’ve taken the list to extremes (which I’m sure you have come to understand by now), but the spirit still lives.
Top Ten Things to Pass Up Even if on Discount
10 Even on discount, do not purchase cut-rate bungee jumping lessons. If you do, at best, you will only be scared poopless. At worst, your family will wonder what you were thinking as they hold a memorial for your three-foot-tall body. (Not to mention that you are six feet wide as well)
9 Even on discount, do not purchase cut-rate meat. If you do, at best, you will only miss a couple of days’ work. At worst, you will be one of the morbidity statistics as the USDA issues a countrywide recall of the E-coli tainted horse meat. (It tasted good going in, right?)
8 Even at a discount, do not buy a truckload of cut-rate toilet tissue. If you do, at best, you will spend more on storage than the original price. At worst, you will be selected for the Dr. Phil TV show segment “Am I full of it since I can’t stop myself from feeling like I need more toilet tissue.” (You’ve noticed how thin the paper is and have taken appropriate action, right?)
7 Even at a discount, do not buy that cut-rate hair restorative product. If you do, at best, you will need to explain your new Day-Glo orange color to the boss. At worst, you will be going through the day answering to the name Uncle Fester and fielding cue ball and reflecting head jokes. ( You always thought Yul Brenner was cool looking, right?)
6 Even at a discount, do not buy that cut-rate wrinkle injection. If you do, at best, you might resemble Donald Duck for a few months. At worst, you read about your doctor being accused by the FDA of using industrial silicone for some procedures, and now you know why you haven’t been able to feel your cheeks. (You do look good, though.)
5 Even at a discount, do not buy that cut-rate parachute for skydiving. If you do, at best, you could experience the thrill of trying to slow down with a tattered canopy. At worst, you will make a lasting impression in the field as you land without the benefit of an active drag-creating device. (Looking as if you did it on purpose doesn’t help the bystanders forget.)
4 Even at a discount, do not buy that cut-rate beer. If you do, at best, you will have all the taste and satisfaction of drinking carbonated defrost. At worst, you will realize your mistake as you read the label and see that the product is 99% salmonella free. (You only noticed that after six bottles, right?)
3 Even at a discount, do not buy cut-rate gold. If you do, at best, you won’t notice until the day your neck and finger turn green. At worst, you will realize that you have paid the highest amount of money for the least amount of gold, and you thought a pound would be a good buy. (you now have an attractive doorstop. Don’t get it wet.)
2 Even at a discount, do not buy cut-rate fruit. If you do, at best, you will have enough left after you cull the spoiled to make one salad. At worst, the USDA you may call to ask you to donate your generations of fruit flies to genetic research. (And you thought those spots in front of your eyes resulted from too little sleep.)
1 Even at a discount, do not buy a cut-rate used car. If you do, at best, you will understand the phrase “Get a horse.” At worst, you might be called by your homeowner association to move what they interpret as a mobile home for stray animals out of your driveway. (It seemed like a good idea to leave the windows down to circulate fresh air since the thing wouldn’t run, right?)
Usually I would have a tour here but today is one of those days that a lighthearted time just doesn’t seem appropriate. We all were stunned into disbelief twenty-one years ago. As a nation, we were horrified that anyone had the lack of humanity to destroy innocent lives in such a brutal manner.
The leaders of this attack have been eliminated and we are left with the memory of the crime. Those who lost mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters are left with the heartbreak of living a life devoid of the warmth and love that was taken away.
Let’s remember those who were lost and those left behind and pray for peace.
A look out the back windows confirms the Mosler safe is still half buried in the backyard. For those of you in the dark, last week, a safe came out of the sky. Inside was someone who looked like Yosemite Sam in his underwear. Good, now we are all caught up. (Please don’t try to understand what a safe is doing falling from the sky. Just go with it.)
A hardy thump on the espresso machine brings it to life and produces a ten-ounce mug of soothing syrup before my hearing goes out. Before approaching the safe again, several long sips of the coffee takes priority over anything to follow.
Communing with my thoughts is suddenly disturbed by the shrill sound of the klaxon warning horn announcing someone at the front door. Having successfully gotten Lucy and Twiggy to stop throwing themselves at the door, my attention turns to the security control panel. I disengage the iron gate, concertina wire, bouncing betty land mines, stinger rocket launchers, tower machine guns, automatic boiling oil dispenser, and all double locks and bolts.
It is time to open the door. As it swings inside, the sight of an odd device is visible sitting on the drive. Looking right and left and deploying the heat-sensitive scanner, it appears no one is on the porch. Approaching the contraption brings into focus a label attached to one leg. The label reads Trebuchet -Acme Amalgamated Industries. Distributed by Daniel Conti Enterprises, Granger, Indiana.
Scratching my head, trying to figure out what the heck this thing is, my central nervous system takes a jolt from a piercing voice from the unexpected. “Dad gum it. What’s the matter, boy? Never seen a Trebuchet before?”
Aghast and Jumping almost out of my skin, I realize on the way down that the Yosemite Sam-looking character has snuck up behind me. “I didn’t see you on the scanner.” This was the best that could be said through my constricted throat. “You varment. I’m wagering that there machine doesn’t pick up figments of your imagination.”
Sam was right. It only picks up heat from living organisms, not some ghost from my imagination. Sam motions me to come closer and hands me an envelope. Before the question, “How long are you going to be here?” is asked, he disappears. Now the only things left are a safe in the back yead, this Trebuchet, and an envelope that must be from Linda Hill. Sure enough, when opened, the message reads: Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “a word that contains a silent letter.” Choose a word that contains a silent letter and use it in your post, or write about words with silent letters in general. Enjoy!
Today’s Good News was submitted by dear friend Harmony Kent from the UK. She thought we would all enjoy it and sent it on. I have reproduced it here in its entirety. (Left the British English alone.) Thank you, Harmony.
Leeds: M62 motorist brings sick driver’s car safely to a stop
A car whose driver had fallen seriously ill while at the wheel on a motorway was brought to a halt by a quick-witted motorist who had realised his plight.
John Barlow said he spotted the Audi going slowly in the outside lane of the M62 near Leeds on Saturday. The driver was slumped with a bloodied face.
Mr. Barlow managed to get his car ahead of the Audi and eased it to a stop before getting out to help the man.
It emerged the driver had suffered a seizure but was well enough to go home.
Mr. Barlow, 59, from Middleton in Greater Manchester, said he first noticed the Audi travelling slower and slower and he pulled alongside to see the driver.
“He looked dead at the wheel. I could see his lips were blue, and he had blood trickling down his face,” Mr. Barlow said.
He pulled into the lane ahead of the Audi, which was travelling at about 30mph (48km/h), before taking his foot off the accelerator and bringing both cars to a stop.
IMAGE SOURCE, PA MEDIA
Image caption,
John Barlow used his car to stop the vehicle after he spotted the driver was seriously ill.
The incident happened at about 15:15 BST on Saturday (September 3) on the M62 eastbound carriageway between junctions 29 and 30, a West Yorkshire Police spokesperson confirmed.
Officers said a man in his 70s had fallen ill, and Mr. Barlow’s actions to stop the car had prevented a “potential serious collision.”
IMAGE SOURCE, JOHN BARLOW
Image caption,
Mr. Barlow pulled in ahead of the ill man’s vehicle and helped ease it to a stop.
After the Audi was stopped, another man helped Mr. Barlow break into the vehicle.
He opened the seriously ill driver’s airway by tilting his jaw backwards, at which point the Audi driver took in a gasp of air.
Other drivers also stopped at the scene, bringing the four-lane carriageway to a halt.
A physio and an off-duty police officer took over the first aid until paramedics arrived.
Meanwhile, a doctor on the opposite carriageway of the M62 travelled to the next junction, turned round, and battled through the backed-up traffic to get to work with a defibrillator.
Mr. Barlow said: “Everyone was amazing, it was a real team effort. They got the man on the floor, then the doctor jumped in as well.”
IMAGE SOURCE, JOHN BARLOW
Image caption,
Motorists stopped to help the seriously ill driver, who had suffered a seizure at the wheel.
Mr. Barlow had been travelling to Pontefract with his wife Kirsty and son Joey, 7, to pick up a new kitten at the time of the incident.
The next day, he received a call from West Yorkshire Police thanking him, and he was told the driver had suffered a seizure but was well enough to go home.
He said he hoped to meet the man he saved in the future, adding: “I’d shake his hand and give him a hug.”
The good news here is someone cared enough to save a life. Today’s JohnKu talks about caring. I hope you all have a delightful weekend.
